Tried DILD, ended up with SP
Hi people,
I discovered yesterday about lucid dreams and decided try to have one for fun. So, all day, from morning 11am to the time I fell asleep, I kept on rubbing my hands and counting my fingers while seriously questioning myself at the same time about wheter the actual present is a dream or not. I also tried to be more aware of my environment : are the mirrors reflecting accuratly, what did I do a few minutes ago, is the water transparent and not blue (for most people when we try to think of water is looks blue, so when mind-creating it, it might look the same)...
When I went to bed, I was a little nervous about getting bad nightmares and awake right into them at the worst moment, so I felt kind of anxious and had difficulties falling into sleep despite efforts of cleaning my mind with what funny things I could dream of, repeating me "The next time I will awake it will be a dream" (in french).
I had a short night for my personal needs (7h30 of sleep while I was quite tired the day before), but since I just had a last dream I miraculously and proudly remembered of (I usually remember dreams maybe 5 times a year...), I wrote it as a note on my phone before going back to sleep. I think I slept for around an hour.
I opened my eyes as I normally do in my habit but I noticed something too much wrong. At the end of my bed, behind it and close to it, I spot a big fluffy, terribly looking chicken, slowly crawling around the bed to come to me, eyes staring into mine, sick and gloomy with a psychopathic killer sparkle. It was like all my fears had been mustered into that unique look. I then started to panick because I never dreamt like that and the feeling was weird. Quickly I remember that I can rub my hands to "reassure me" or the like - because I must be hallucinating IRL - but they go through each other. More precisly, I don't see them anyway, while they should be in front of me. The rest of the room seems blurry white/dark but I don't pay any attention to it. It has been only a few seconds until I awoke and instinctivly I immediatly start contracting firmly head and neck, as though I'd got a cramp, making them tremble, shake violently and rubbing my against my pillow. From that moment on, I hear clearly that sound continuously. I couldn't move any of my body members, nor speak. The chicken sneaks towards the right side of my bed until he waits there, same frightening expression on his face. I somehow noticed that the end of my bed was built like my previous one, so I don't think my eyes IRL were open the whole scene or just part of it. The world was turned upside-down from my head shaking against my pillow and I almost don't remember anything but the chicken eyes. I felt like prisoner of my own body. It was like I was dying drowned in an endless sea. 6 or 7 long seconds later I realized I could close my eyelids, which I did right away, still shocked and in panick. Around 4 seconds later, the "feeling" of this horrible sight strangely faded away. Right after that the shaking slowly stopped and then for a few seconds more I felt dizzy and unable to reopen my eyes.
When I finally managed to do it and reach the reality, I had the strong conviction of having had wake up two times in a row this morning.
I think I had a so called sleep paralysis but what I find weird is that I could think consciously from the very beginning of my first awakening. The contractions were real because I was still feeling a slight numbness in the back of my neck right after the event. Any ideas ? Was I somewhat "lucid" ? I didn't do that much reality checks today because I am afraid of getting the same thing again...
Thank you for reading all my stuff if you did :)
