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    Thread: Lonely/boring dreams

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      Lonely/boring dreams

      Something I have been struggling with lately is a feeling that my dreams are lonely and uninteresting. I find the possibilities of dreaming to be exciting, whether lucid or not (although lucid is a big goal). But then I dream so much about buying food, schools I have attended, an old workplace, etc. And it becomes mundane. Not only that, it's lonely. It feels like there isn't much in my dreams these days to engage me.

      Any advice on changing this? Especially the lonely part.

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      Does anything happen in those dreams?

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      Things happen, but they often seem un-engaging. Or shallow, maybe? Like, I'll be walking around campus, and there will be a lot of people. Or shopping at a grocery store. Or buying food. Or there was a class that I forgot that I was in. Sometimes a lot of things happen, but it's like flipping through the channels on TV and not really watching much of anything. Some of the dreams seem like they should be interesting in retrospect - now and then I dream about spaceships, for example. But it's not the kind of dream that makes me look forward to dreaming it again. It's just kind of like "huh, a spaceship. Space. Hmm."

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      What do you want to have dreams about?
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      do the dreams reflect what is going on in your life?

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      A lot of my dreams could be considered mundane in setting and situation but I consider every dream fascinating as Iím involved in a completely imagined reality of the mind which is amazing in itself whether exciting things are happening or not.

      Unfortunately, I think mundane dreams are the norm and are mostly a reflection of our real lives. Doing more exciting and adventurous things in waking life would probably be the best remedy for this but obviously we canít always make fantastical things happen in reality.

      Sometimes I find watching an exciting movie or playing a video game before bed works itís way into my dreams but quite often I may dream about watching a movie or playing a video game rather than participating in the story. Iíve heard reading and visualising is a good thing to try but I havenít had much experience to know how effective it is.

      I donít fully understand what you mean by ďLonely dreamsĒ. Do you mean youíre alone in them with no people around? Or you feel alone in them? That feeling I suppose is justified as in your dreams you really are alone in that world (unless you believe in shared dreaming). Personally, I quite like being alone sometimes in dreams and is a nice change from reality.
      Last edited by Tiktaalik; 12-01-2021 at 01:47 PM.
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      What do you want to have dreams about?
      That sounds like it would make a fun thread topic! What I would like to have dreams about are meaningful relationships with recurring dream characters. Sometimes I read about people's interactions with their DC's, and I think it's that more than anything that makes their dreams seem so impressive to me. It's kind of like the difference between visiting another planet, and visiting another planet that has intelligent life.

      do the dreams reflect what is going on in your life?
      The dreams often do reflect what is going on in my life. I'm not sure that's the problem though, because my life isn't really all that boring.

      I don’t fully understand what you mean by “Lonely dreams”. Do you mean you’re alone in them with no people around? Or you feel alone in them? That feeling I suppose is justified as in your dreams you really are alone in that world (unless you believe in shared dreaming).
      Both, but more so that I feel alone in them. I think. I feel so disconnected - kind of like going shopping at a grocery store. There might be a lot of people around, but they don't seem to relate to me very much or I to them. Last night I had a dream that involved an adventure with another person, but all I remembered today was that it was "a companion".

      Having reflected on this, I think that part of the problem might be that I don't pay much attention to people in my waking life. I'm kind of a loner, and unfortunately some of the way people manifest themselves in my dreams is how I have gotten used to thinking about the people around me. So today I started trying to notice people more, and was making an effort to pay attention to names. This afternoon I took a nap and had a dream involving a dream character that had a name. That might be a coincidence, but I don't often dream about people with names unless I know them.

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      Quote Originally Posted by cedwards105 View Post
      Having reflected on this, I think that part of the problem might be that I don't pay much attention to people in my waking life. I'm kind of a loner, and unfortunately some of the way people manifest themselves in my dreams is how I have gotten used to thinking about the people around me. So today I started trying to notice people more, and was making an effort to pay attention to names. This afternoon I took a nap and had a dream involving a dream character that had a name. That might be a coincidence, but I don't often dream about people with names unless I know them.
      I think thatís a good idea and demonstrates nicely how dreams can teach us things about ourselves and ways we can improve in waking life. The more you reflect and ponder these things (especially before sleep) the more likely it is to come up in your dreams.

      Iím fairly introverted myself and encounter similar things with my DCs. Similarly, Iím looking to find some persistent characters I can interact with and get to know better too but my plan is to find/ discover them in my lucid dreams.

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      your life isn't boring?
      so, what, are you a spontaneous person, who does all sorts of different things?
      the impression i get, is that you can answer what this dream means.

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      Quote Originally Posted by aussiemusician View Post
      your life isn't boring?
      the impression i get, is that you can answer what this dream means.
      Yes, I think you guys have helped me think through this. Thanks!

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