Encountering some problems on my quest to obtain lucidity

Hello, I've been attempting on and off for the past year or so to have a lucid dream. My habits consist of standard reality checks and keeping a dream journal; along with my primary goal of successfully completing a WILD without having to rely on WBTB (I usually fall asleep directly after waking, usually I turn off the alarm without actually remembering turning it off until I've awoken again). Generally when attempting the WILD method in particular I can't obtain lucidity and get stuck in a "loop" of restlessness, falling into sleep paralysis faster then my brain can shut off; which leads to restless nights such as tonight and the past 2 nights, all of which have made me stay in a conscious state of mind until I pass out (For example, tonight I laid in bed around 10 PM; It is now 12, and I will probably be "forced awake" for the next few hours).

As the title implies, I have a few questions as follows:

1. I can "dream" or perceive my conscious reality with my eyes open very easily via WILD methods. I've gone as far as seeing cartoons play on my wall while my eyes were wide open, along with walls looking as though they are in a seemingly different dimension then their objective state and objects around my room contrasting in size and shape then which I would normally perceive them. My problem lays in the fact that I am unable to visualize anything while my eyes are closed. Only twice in my life have I gotten close to actually having a WILD.

2. Is there anyway to get back to sleep easily even after unsuccessful WILD attempts? A lot of the time I get so tired I contemplate suicide; not something I particularly find healthy, and I am not a suicidal person by any means.

3. Whenever I get close to having something which seems to be a LD it seems very, very spiritual, something I don't seem to see mentioned often so I'm curious if these "half" LDs are more along the lines of astral projection or something?

Thanks for reading, and hopefully having some answers or tips for me :)

Quick update on my progress; Last night I closed my eyes with my eyes listening to Björk with my TV on, with visualizations. When I slipped into deep enough sleep to have intense eye movements with my eyes closed, it made me feel as though I were watching a strobe light. Needless to say it was a fairly insane experience, the color red was very prominent even when the visualizations hold a wide array of colors.

It's hard to recall all of which happened, but I'm defiantly going to try this again but with binural beats.

Though, I must say, I felt as though I've been dreaming all day. Extremely strong derealization and depersonalization. My judgment, memory, and response have all been sluggish to a very noticeable degree.

You're definitely getting close to a successful lucid dream or sleep paralysis. Before you lay down for bed, tell yourself your intent and what you plan to do in a lucid dream. And do not be afraid of the hallucinations associated with the WILD method; be strong, and let it take you for the ride. Keep at it!

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Originally Posted by zellster

You're definitely getting close to a successful lucid dream or sleep paralysis. Before you lay down for bed, tell yourself your intent and what you plan to do in a lucid dream. And do not be afraid of the hallucinations associated with the WILD method; be strong, and let it take you for the ride. Keep at it!

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Sleep paralysis isn't the problem. It almost comes second nature when my head hits the bed; the problem is losing my motor command neurons to a dream.