My mind messing with my head.

So I have been trying to lucid dream since last July. No luck although there were several opportunities to possibly slip into one but I just do not realize it while in the dream state or when I tried after going through SP. I stopped trying for about a month or so after experiencing the crazy scary SP, but during that time of not reading anything about lucid dreaming...I found that my senses while dreaming were all heightend. I felt many things (including having sex at one point and I remember feeling amazing) but also just touching random things and everything was very clear and vivid. My dreams ran more smoothly than sporadic scenes like they normally are.

But as soon as that motivates me to read up on lucid dreaming again, it stops. I feel like my mind is playing tricks on me. I won't remember any dreams and won't be as vivid as they were when I'm not concentrating on LDing. I used an app a few weeks ago and for two nights it gave me crazy scary weird dreams. I had found my dream sign finally (although it was the friend of an ex - he just kept poppin up in my dreams which I found slightly odd that it would be him of all people) but now I don't see him anymore in my dreams.

Any suggestions on what to do?

Your brain is giving you a cruel situation now. Could it be the stress or excitement? Or just the focus on lucid dreaming which causes your brain to mess with you? :?

Some people got their first lucid without trying or expecting anything. I wonder if not focusing on lucid dreaming will help you. Or it could be the things that you were reading which got kind of altered when you're dreaming.

Dream recall and having lucid dreams fluctuates. You may not be doing anything different, and sometimes you won't remember your dreams and you won't have any LDs. That's normal. But if you are forcing or trying too hard to have LDs, that could be a problem. It's better to "know" that you gonna have a LD tonight, than "wish" to have it. It will come back, don't worry.

Yes this happens to me too, but the good thing is it probably isn't all bad news. The expectation and excitement of having a lucid dream could indeed inhibit your ability to have one, maybe because you are spending more energy etc.
However a certain extent is also caused because of your interpretation, when you really want something and you don't have it you start to make up excuses (Even really small almost unnoticable ones), so maybe it's not all as bad as it may seem and it just happens to be temporarily. The negative attitude however will not help and will only make it worse. Keep up a good spirit and it will happen :)

Awesome, thank you for all of the advice! I am excited to someday be able to lucid dream so that is the outlook I will keep. A couple of weeks ago I was practicing MILD every night and meditating right before bed and that did help. I just got stressed out with school a little, but I'm going to start it back up tonight. Thanks again!