Thread: Is my brother unteachable?

What type of Dyslexia does he have? I don't see it as being a huge problem to be honest unless he can't learn anything. If it's just read/write he should still be able to. Now if there's really no way that he can do a dream journal, my advice would be that he spends some minutes every morning recalling and GOING OVER his dream, maybe a couple times (just in his mind). Then he'll easier recall it when he has time to voice record it

I would recommend him and you sitting down and him telling you his dreams, you write them out plus the extra stuff. For some people it is harder to commit. It took me 2 months to have an LD. Now I am only like 6 months in and having loads of them. Keep him motivated by telling him yours and how realistic it is, but keep in mind that it isn't really till that first crazy vivid LD that you are hooked.

Almost everyone including your brother has the ability to lucid dream, it just a matter of dedication. It's tough to get into the learning how to lucid dream when you are that young since usually children of that age don't have a tonne of willpower for things they don't truly understand. Not that means your brother is one of those people, I do know two or three people who taught themselves how to lucid dream at the age of 11 or 12.

It can be hard to remember RCing. Can you make a game of it? Like each time you see a cool car, or whatever is of interest and fun to you. If you guys spend time together, maybe you could RC together. Make a competition who can RC more. Just remember to put emotions into it.

When you tell him about your lucids and he gets excited, that's the best time for aeareness questions and RCs. That's when you tell him, what if right then you guys were in a lucid. Then RC together.

Thanks everyone. I'm not really sure how I will do it... But I will try to teach him. Maybe waiting until he is a bit older? I'm not sure. @Gab It's hard to understand if you think I can't remember RCing but 6 months of lucid dreaming does form a habit for me. When I was starting I just looked at my hands every time I went through a door. I have no problem with lucid dreaming, and believe me he wants to lucid dream but I don't really have time to teach him while trying to improve myself. I'm thinking the best thing to do is wait until he is 15/16.

Originally Posted by GangsterPanda

Hey everyone ,
Me and my brother (age 13) always walk our dog on weekends, my mom does it the rest of the time. During these walks I always bring up lucid dreaming, he is the only one in my family that won't think i'm crazy. He really wants to learn but it's been about a month now and he's starting to lose hope. Bering in mind he is dyslexic, can he be taught? I know that this doesn't mean he cant't be taught but it effects him. I have tried teaching him most techniques, but he can't even remember to RC. It truly is difficult because when I tell him the lucid dreams I have he get's really excited. But he can't write very well either so keeping a dream journal is next to impossible. And my mom would probably not put up with voice recording either, he wakes up earlier than anyone else. Is there still hope? He want's to join dream views but i'm not sure if it's a good idea because he can get really upset by even the smallest thing. What do you guys think? I'm running low on time also I have so much to do on and off lucid dreaming, I don't know what the best thing is to do.
Thanks everyone
- GangsterPanda

Stop trying to evangelize and make others like the same things you like. Lucid dreaming in particular is something that you simply cannot do unless you REALLY want to do it.

Yes, maybe wait a few years. You've planted the seed in his mind, now wait until he's much older (I would say more like 18 at least) to bring up the subject again. Otherwise, you're going to make him hate it.

Maybe trying writing a handful of keywords about his dreams. Something like:

Park. Monster. Screamed. Ran!

He'll be able to remember the dreams if he reviews the keywords at various times in the future.

Originally Posted by GangsterPanda

@Gab It's hard to understand if you think I can't remember RCing but 6 months of lucid dreaming does form a habit for me.

You said in your OP that your brother can't even remember to RC. To this I suggested you help HIM remember by RCing together, or making it a game for his sake, not yours.

AH! tape recorder.

Well this might be just an idea but why not let him draw his dreams? remember that when you are actively engaging with your dreams and write/ or draw them after waking up you're already on the right track!

The best method for lucid dreaming for me is to take a nap or a going back to sleep after wakening up. this way you'll be conscious but your brain will still be dreamthinking. This wil increase your chance for a lucid dream immensely!

Trough i don't know how old your brother was but ive had lucid dreams when i was 10 or 12 without any knowledge of it. besides that,. a child learns way faster than an adult and will easily pick up on habbits so i don't see why you wouldn't try it now.

Originally Posted by cmind

Stop trying to evangelize and make others like the same things you like. Lucid dreaming in particular is something that you simply cannot do unless you REALLY want to do it.

Yes, maybe wait a few years. You've planted the seed in his mind, now wait until he's much older (I would say more like 18 at least) to bring up the subject again. Otherwise, you're going to make him hate it.

"He really wants to learn but it's been about a month now and he's starting to lose hope."
"It truly is difficult because when I tell him the lucid dreams I have he get's really excited."

From those statements it is clear that his brother takes an interest in this subject and he is keen to learn more about it. He's not trying to push anything on him, he simply said that sometimes he brings it up as a topic of conversation and it caught his brother's interest.

Reality checking requires prospective memory. That means if your brother is the kind of person that forgets to turn off the tv when he leaves the room or leaves the lights up even if u tell him, that means is nothing about lucid dreaming. In the other hand, it's not the act of reminding yourself to reality check that forms a good prospective memory exercise, but the connections. For example mnemonics help a lot, and so do routines.

If he really likes it, then I'm sure he will keep asking even if you stop talking about it. Also, there's loads of ways to be imaginative with a dream journal. You can put a selection of symbols that he can cross once he wakes up. Like make him pin if the dream was an adventure, then if it was good or bad, then if it had known people or unknown people....there's so many many ways. The good thing is that prospective memory, like every other memory, is something you can develop further, you just need to get the right aids. For your brother reminders would be good, even if they mean you asking him if he's dreaming.

On a last note, lucid dreaming TAKES effort if you want them regular, so try not to over-excite your brother. At such young age many time kids don't have patience for long term reward mechanics, and you can't really help with that unless he really wants to lucid dream

PS: Gab advice is great. Doing reality checks together works wonders, because the stronger the connection between the element and the exercise, the more chances your prospective memory will "kick in".

Originally Posted by Araishu

"He really wants to learn but it's been about a month now and he's starting to lose hope."
"It truly is difficult because when I tell him the lucid dreams I have he get's really excited."

From those statements it is clear that his brother takes an interest in this subject and he is keen to learn more about it. He's not trying to push anything on him, he simply said that sometimes he brings it up as a topic of conversation and it caught his brother's interest.

In my experience, if someone has a passion for something, they self-motivate to find out more about it and don't rely on someone else "bringing it up". Then again, I've always been an autodidact so that's how I see things.

I agree with Cmind.

I would still encourage your brother to keep a dream journal. You should tell him that the purpose of his dream journal is to help him recall his dreams, it doesn't matter if no one understands it as long as he does. Your own dream journal is meant for you.

Originally Posted by cmind

In my experience, if someone has a passion for something, they self-motivate to find out more about it and don't rely on someone else "bringing it up". Then again, I've always been an autodidact so that's how I see things.

There's nothing to say that he hasn't already. However, he is quite young so perhaps doing self-research is not his kind of thing. Personally, I've always enjoyed researching about things that interest me, but I know people who simply do not have the patience to do so, but if he's interested, it's definitely a good sign. And then you also have to think about the fact that he has dyslexia which may mean that he finds it difficult to read properly. I know if I had problems reading things, I wouldn't go out of my way to provide extra-reading for myself. Maybe he relies on his brother's advice and actually likes to talk about it because it's the only way he can find out about it.

He can be taught, definitely! It just takes a different amount of time for each person to get their first lucid. Keep him motivated, keep him trying and he will do it. If it really seems like it's not working, try a different technique with him.

both take 5htp (vitamin doubles morning rem), go to bed at the same time, wake up 4 hours later and read about lucid dreaming together for 30 mins. go back to bed for 2 hours, wake up, write out your dreams then wake up your brother and immeditely ask him what he was dreaming about. because he took 5htp he'll be dreaming when you wake him up, no matter what. comment on the things that he should have noticed were dreamlike or unusual by saying that would have been a great to rc. If you're really committed to your brother, help him make notes and figure out his dream signs. doing this will also greatly increase his dream recall and likely yours since you'll be so focused on lucid dreaming throughout the night. eventually you could sleep in the same bed and split audio of dream drums and dream together. I started at the age of 5 and I know others who have started just as early, its mostly about recognizing that at any moment you could actually be asleep and keeping that state of mind, with more dreams under his belt this thought will stay with him more throughout the day

I didn't know dyslexia was associated with learning disablities.

I started off voice recording my journal because I didn't want people to read my notebook. But now I just write the title of the dream and then look over them and mentally relive them before bed to get me into the LD mood. I don't think dyslexia will effect his ability to be lucid. I have a very slight case of it, in the way that I mix up numbers, cant count objects well, mix up letters in words etc. Perhaps things like ADD could make it hard to remember to RC. But you could always try WILD. I performed my first 5 LDs without reality checking.

Originally Posted by Pakman43

I started off voice recording my journal because I didn't want people to read my notebook. But now I just write the title of the dream and then look over them and mentally relive them before bed to get me into the LD mood. I don't think dyslexia will effect his ability to be lucid. I have a very slight case of it, in the way that I mix up numbers, cant count objects well, mix up letters in words etc. Perhaps things like ADD could make it hard to remember to RC. But you could always try WILD. I performed my first 5 LDs without reality checking.

I think he was saying that the dyslexia will stop him from being able to read ad much about it and DJ, but I agree with the voice DJ it should change everything.