Give all you've got, or try not to try so hard? (my story, RCs and MILD + some thoughts)

Hey there, everyone, this is my first post ever, and it will be a hell of a long one. I have a couple of questions, but first i'd like to tell a little about my lucid dreaming progress. In the end I will add some thoughts about my practice that I believe that could interest some people. Sorry for the big post, and I hope you guys can take the time to answer at least the Part 2.



-----Part 1 (my story)-----

I recently got interested in lucid dreaming and began practicing some basic technics like Dream Journaling and Reality Checking. In the beginning I would try to RC as often as I could, later on I began to RC everytime i crossed a doorway, then everytime I saw someone and then everytime I saw someone I knew. I quickly realized I was going nuts and just began to RC every now and then, maybe an average of 15-20 times a day. After one week, I began to get frustrated and said "that's it, it's now or never: I either LD tonight or I will never again waste my waking energy thinking about this crap" But then i came to myself and thought: "No, that's not the way to go. I read it is normal to take up to 3 weeks before your first lucid. I will keep my practice in a relaxed way for two more weeks, not worrying too much and then I will decide if I continue to try or not". Woke up next morning and couldn't remember any dreams. Went to the computer, spent one hour or so reading and felt so tired that I decided to get some more sleep. When I woke up one hour later, my heart was beating like crazy, I had my very first LD ever! A short moment of awareness during a flight followed by a lucid False Awakening.

Well, sorry for the long story. That's just to say that I early discovered that i can lucid dream too, and that perhaps trying too hard can be a very boring mistake. Since this first and only LD 2 weeks have passed and nothing has happened, no more LDs. I know that very normal, but it really got me thinking and researching technics and methods, and here come my questions:


-----Part 2 (questions about RCs and MILDs)-----

first of all, what is the real purpose of a reality check? Is it to make a new habit, or is it to improve your general awareness? I've been questioning myself whether I should RC at intervals of about 30-60min or if I should RC only when I notice something at least a little out of the ordinary. The last seems best because it puts less pressure, is much more fun and would force me to take more notice of the world as I try to find the cues for my reality checking. Besides, it is easier to get into the mindset of REALLY questioning if you are awake. Only problem is that i hardly doubt I could get much more than 5 RCs on a regular day...

second, I've decided to begin MILD two days ago. I read a lot of tutorials and especially liked Nayia's one. My main question is if all that mantra saying will not go directly against the idea of "not trying too hard". I mean, spending 2-5 minutes repeating the very same words and thoughts is quite an effortful thing...

Other doubt I have is about visualization. I have quite a hard time visualizing sceneries in first person. If I begin to reimagine a dream, at some moment I will want to visualize some digression from the dream (I mean, I want to see myself attaining lucidity, and after this point I can't keep just remembering the scenes from my dream; besides that, I really enjoy trying to imagine other landscapes from movies, pictures, books and sheer imagination). Creating the landscape is hard, but totally feasible and with some practice I should improve a lot. The tricky part is visualizing myself in FIRST person exploring the scenery, with all the changes in perspective, new objects coming up and even new rooms being explored. I will usually and unintentinally slip to THIRD person, that if I can visualize the exploration at all. Any tips on this subject?


-----Part 3 (Some thoughts and an idea for exercising Prosp/Retro Memory)-----

So, here are some things I've been thinking and developing:

First, I am coming more and more to the conclusion that fallowing your own path is the way to go, especially when we talk about something that has so much relation with intention. Going your own way can even help with some sort of placebo effect. Nevertheless, getting some advice is also tremendously helpful, as it can get you some insight into your own process. I also believe that not trying too hard may be a good choice, as it makes you more tolerant with failure and more likely to enjoy the work.

One thing I think some people will find curious is that I have stopped to DJ. I know it was hindering my progress, as I would get over stressed about spending so much time every morning. I even tried to stop writing texts and began writing only keywords, but even that was taking too much time. So I decided to take a good break and only get back to it once I FEEL like recording my dreams is really lacking in my life. Until then I will just try to remember my dreams first thing in the morning and think about them during the day, when my mind find some idle time 8)

Other things I've been doing is meditation and practicing my prospective and retrospective memory. The good thing about this practices is that they help my everydy life in the Waking World so much, that I would do them even if I didn't know anything about LDs. That way it takes almost all LD-related pressure off these activities :)

I believe that many people could benefit from hearing from my prospective/retrospective memory daily practice. What I do is to decide 3-5 cues that I am likely to encounter throught the day, like "next time I sit for lunch", or "first time i hear a birds singing" and stuff like that. Once these events take place, I remember about this exercise and then I try to recall what has happened so far in my day. When I am little motivated, I recall just the last hour or so. However, if I feel like really working out, I will recall everything that happened since I last tried this exercise, or even since I woke up in the morning. Nowadays, I try to decide 2 cues in the beginning of the day and the rest I choose as the day progresses. As I deepen my practice, I intend to decide all the cues right in the beginning of the day.


-----Final Part (last words)-----

Well, that's all, folks. Sorry for the big post, and I hope some people have the patience of reading it all (though I kinda doubt it). Thanks a lot, dreamers.

Hey lucsande, welcome aboard!

I actually read the whole thing! You seem to be well on your way and to be thinking about it quite a bit, which is good. I have a response to one of your questions (I'll leave the rest for others to answer).

If you really don't want to take the time to write down your dreams in the morning, at the very least you should tell them to yourself as if you're talking to a friend. Not out loud of course - heck, if you do that people would just think you're CRAZY! :lol: But I mean subvocally, but actually form the words in your mind just as you would if you were talking to a friend or wrtiting them down. This forces you to really go through in order and get the memories organized and go through them once. This is a lot better than just quickly remembering an image or two and thinking "Ok, I've remembered that dream!". Not good enough - you really need to at least put it into words, which makes you go as far back as you can remember and then work your way forward telling each part, and occasionally remembering other parts along the way. Of course this is not as good as actually writing them down, but it's second best.

When my recall was at it's peak I was writing by hand in my notebook as soon as I woke up and then later I'd bring the notebook down and type the dreams up in my online DJ and take the time to google for images or occasionally photoshop something together. I sincerely believe all of this really helped me to get my mind firmly focused on my dreams all throughout the day.

So my best advice is always write them down... once you get lazy you'll start to backslide but at first you won't realize it. If some days you really don't want to write, then at least review it in words under your breath as if you're writing. I wouldn't do this for several days in a row though or make a habit of it - but if you do start to slack off at least this way you can keep from losing too much ground too fast.

Hey, thanks for the answer. And for the time too :)

What I've been doing so far is to review them backwards. But trying to tell them to myself afterwards would be a nice upgrade to the practice, and wouldn't be very effortful. Great idea!
As for writing, I realize most people here believe them to be essencial. But for me, curious as it may seem, it was being counterproductive. I know my recall was getting lower and lower while I kept my DJ. My own explanation is that unconscious and even a part of my conscious were thinking "hey, what you liked most about this LD thing is that you could get more time alive, as your dreams would also be a part of your daily experience. However, DJ is taking even more time out of your life than the dreams are giving. And you want to keep up with this crap? Really? Well, let's see if you will as I keep getting in the way. How well will your recall be when i prevent you from recalling anything, huh?"

So I decided to chill out a little. Especially because I believe we are capable of developing our recall just with some mental practice. In the future, when I feel the limitations of my choice, I may change my mind. It will probably be like this: I will be thinking to myself "hey, i remember I had the craziest dream last week, but I can't remember it very well right now. Crap!" and then i will probably begin to journal the sceneries, the characters and main actions and will keep it until i think I should add some more detail. In the long run, I may end up writing all my dreams in full detail, but it's gonna have to be a slow process until that point :p

Thanks again for your help, Darkmatters

Yo, congrats on first lucid dream! :thumbup:
I would suggest to at least DJ lucid dreams, because that we can recall them easier don't means we can't forget them, and accidentally forgetting some amazing lucid dream without anything to restore it is not something you would want to do.
About RC, yes you need to really question as in if it was dream. If you make reality check an habit you will probably end up successfully reality checking in dream without actually realizing it's dream. Dunno about other question though, haven't had any luck with MILDs. :zzz:

Ok, if you really feel you should stop DJing then go ahead and do it, but you should keep track of how many dreams you can remember each night. In my case after I stopped I can still remember 2 or sometimes 3 dreams from each night in fair detail, but when I was DJing I was remembering sometimes 7 dreams in intense detail. But of course dreaming is different for each person and what works for one can work against another - we each need to experiment around to find what works best for us. Just be aware that often to stop DJing is a sign of turning away from the dreamworld and the subconscious and usually weakens the connection.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by lucsande

As for writing, I realize most people here believe them to be essencial. But for me, curious as it may seem, it was being counterproductive.

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You got a great answer from Darkmatters. When you tell your dream with words, it transfers it from dream memory to your daytime memory and it will be easier to remember later.

Writing them in DJ is important, because it tells your mind, that dreaming and remembering your dreams is important to you. It will help you get more of them and have better recall. But any activity in which you think, talk, draw, write your dreams, is helpfull.

DJ helps in other ways too - you will be able to revisit your cool older dreams and get motivation from them, find different patterns - like bed time and number or vividity of dreams relation, best time to WBTB, take a B6 vitamin, what time you get most lucids, find your dream signs and such.

I§m certainly not trying to push you into anything. Just saying. Happy dreams:alien: