This morning I realized that a change in attitude was in order.
I used to be frustrated that I have only had one lucid dream despite the fact that I had started trying again on February 26, which is now almost two months ago. I had originally expected this to be much quicker, since two decades ago I used to be a successful regular lucid dreamer.
This morning I had a revelation: this has been one of the most successful hobbies that I have had! Let's redefine success.
Two months ago I was a caffeine addict often so brain fogged that I was going through waking life with the awareness level equivalent to some of my non-lucid dreams. I was tired all the time, especially in the mornings. I never excercised. I was having short term memory failure. My stress level was through the roof. I had zero dream recall. I also was struggling with self esteem issues, wallowing in my issues, and concentrating on contradictions in my personality.
Ever since I started trying to lucid dream again, I have reduced my caffeine intake, started exercising regularly, became more aware while awake and started a lot of self analysis. While I seldom remember long detailed dreams, but sometimes I do, and even when I don't some of my dream fragments are insightful gems. I have learned new techniques for memory improvement. I have succeeded in drastically reducing my stress at least for most days. Most of these self improvements are connected to my desire to lucid dream, so this goal has started a chain reaction which has born unbelievably successful fruit.
If I had been successful at LDing right away, I might not have had as much motivation to change in so many great ways. So it is actually awesome that this is progressing at the pace that it is. I have had one LD during this time as a reminder that yes I can do it, and I have come close to becoming lucid a few times I feel. I can't wait to see how this hobby will continue to improve my life. Yay, for lucid dreaming!
