Help! First two LDs, and an inability to repeat

REM This originally was in the n00bie subforum out of ignorance. I've attempted to ratify this and it's now in the proper place.

This definitely seems to be the best site on lucid dreaming i've found thus far- i've read the book by LaBerg, smoked calea and in time had a lucid dream; albeit seemingly without the help of either.

I had been doing reality checks for a good week, and reminding myself "The next time I'm dreaming, I need to remember I am dreaming." After three days of that I smoked a good bit of Calea before bed, yet to no avail. However my dreams are very vivid and imaginative due in part to dream journaling and probably the calea.

So after a week (5 days) I stopped everything to take an unintended break of sorts. Two nights after doing nothing I had my first lucid dream. Basically I was fighting in the trenches in WWI and all the sudden before going over the top with my best friends, surely to die, as the whistle blows- I think "Whoa! I'm dreaming. And suddenly I made everyone dissapear so I could begin my favourite form of flying. In which you take a towel or small sheet and hold it in your hands, toss it up an pull on it downwards to produce lift.

Unfortunatly I lost dreamvision in my right eye, then the next thing that happened I was back in my body. No doubt due to my overexcitement.

Fastforward to today, its been two weeks since that night- i've done reality checks every so often, and always remind myself to remember before falling asleep. I read about MILD indepth on the site and decided to try it. Whilst perusing through the tutorials section I found the thread on Brainwave Entrainment, of which I am still slightly skeptical. Being a former and off and on Intellectual user of psychedelics I was very familiar with the Brainwave Generator, with which I had been able to induce very very very weird experiances- though never with the intent of dreaming in mind.

Coupled with Bwgen and the MILD tutorial off to bed I went. I used the Ld Test preset and laid down as comfortably as I could. Within 15 minutes I had two false awakenings in sucession before I woke up the third time in reality. Very odd, and I realised I wasn't focusing logically enough- I began to count: "1. I am dreaming, 2. I am dreaming, 3. I am dreaming" and before I even got to 8 I was paralysed.

In all my experiences with Psychedelics I have never had a more trippy and internally rewarding experiance- Ever as with my second LD I will began to detail.

Suddenly I remembered I needed to open my eyes, I did and saw a colourful door already open to this "Toon Town" type of building, very colourful almost all primary colours. It was remarkable, so detailed- so much that as I entered I saw in the right corner a kitchenette with a Cofeemaker, Toaster Oven, a Wall Clock that was Binary, Cups with the Boeing Logo on them, the wallpaper, floor tiles- everything. I remarked how wonderful it was.

I did some hovering, and Breast Stroke flying- my favourite being competitive swimmer. Soon I felt as though I needed to rush with testing, as I didn't know how long the dream would last. I pointed to the floor with much conviction and command in my voice "Hannah!" I ordered, knowing that my Female aqauintance would appear... she didn't, and after two or three tries a large stuffed animal appeared with the same essential shape as that Disney cartoon dog... his name I forget.

I forgot about making Hannah appear, or rather stopped caring, and realised that:

1. I could hear the actual Binaural wave minus the "Gushing River Background," whats more I realised this sound had been playing the ENTIRE time.

2. I could not see anything with my right eye, as though I were blind.

With time my right eye closed, as though it were a steel watertight bulkhead. I pried it open with my hands only to have a psuedoblack colour invade my right vision. I remained fully lucid during this time, albeit slightly frustrated.

Then I awoke. Any thoughts?


I've tried everything in my power to have another WILD LD, I've tried every "LD Test Preset" manual configuration possible with no luck. I've tried doing WILD without the Bwgen, yet I always fall asleep to which a vivid dream ensues the end of which always marks my awakening. They last roughly 30 minutes RT. I count with the "I am dreaming," I count without it. Around 50 or so I begin to lose my ability to count efficiently, if I think about it I regain that control and end up counting to 489 then back down. If I do not think about it I count presumably another 8 numbers and fall asleep and have non lucid dreams.

I tend to think i'd have atleast one LD dream simply my chance, especially with all the work my mind absorbs dealing with the subject.

So what should I do? MILD doesn't work, I have excellent Dream Recall, and nearly 24 hours a day to experiment with 6 to 7 spent sleeping leaving a perfect setting for WILD.

Continue trying bwgen?

Anyhelp is appreciated, and sorry for the length of the post.

Edit
Calea Z. on Erowid[/url]

Update:
Just tried another bit of MILD using a modified version of the LD Test Preset, to which I lessened the background noise by half- to where I can distinctly discern the wave. After 48 minutes of relaxing with eyes closed I only briefly and mildy got any hypnagogic images, only one of which was a actual representation of something; a flowing stream as through from a champagne bottle.

I took a long break after this attempt, then began another without any entrainment. This time very little if any hypnagogic images ever manigfested. I lay 45+ minutes, after 15 of which I felt sleepy- despite laying the remaning 30+ minutes I never got anywhere, despite feeling the most relaxed in my life.


I realise I am still new to it all, but cannot help feeling "bad off." If you haven't read my original post please attempt too, as it explains my situation completely. Otherwise, any advice is and always will be greatly appreciated.