dream people realize I'm aware that I'm dreaming and get upset?

I've been having lucid dreams for awhile now, I'm a every curious person and try to figure out what my dreams mean or try controlling them. I first started with having sleep paralysis that turned into lucid dreaming... the only problem is, once I gain consciousness that I am in deed dreaming, I'll turn to one of the dream people and say "hey this is just a dream" or "non of this is real" and automatically they ALL turn to me pointing at me as if I "found out", their eyes will get big or face will go blank. Like their face will illegitimately will disappear and they get offended that I found out this huge secret that I wasn't supposed to know and then I'll be thrown out of the dream or sucked out of the dream or everything will crumble around me then BAM I wake up.
I'm wanting to know how I can prevent this because I really want to go further with being lucid without them "finding out" or them not getting so upset about me knowing. why do they react that way and why do I get thrown or sucked out of the dream when I finally gain awareness?

:welcome: to DV, TigerLilly!

I think it's mostly a matter of expectation... The reaction of DCs (dream characters) when you tell them that it's a dream varies a lot from dream to dream and even from DC to DC. In some case they start laughing at you, in others they just don't believe you, sometimes they'll get hostile (like what you're describing) and sometimes they'll accept it a move on. In some case they can even tell you "yeah, I know" or "I knew all along, haven't you" or even tip you off before you become lucid yourself. I've had all of these and in my opinion the "mood" / reaction that you get from the DC is just random and depends on the specific dream plot.

However, one other thing that can effect their reaction is the dreamer. Our brains are biased and tend to remember bad experiences in more detail than good experiences. So I think that after one or two bad DC reaction experiences you just developed that unconscious bias that DCs are likely to become hostile when you tell them it's a dream. That in turn created the expectation for them to be hostile in your next lucid dream, and because our expectation in a lucid is what gives us the ability to control the dream, the DCs are much more likely to be hostile (than just in random, as it would be without the bias). So it's like a positive feedback loop... The more this happened them more it's likely to happen again - it's a pretty common issue actually...

As solutions go, first try to get rid of this bias and expect them to stay nice next time. You can even try to control their behavior and to reverse their hostility after they turn on you - it's a dream, you should be able to control everything there given enough practice. Also, you could just stop telling people it's a dream! Personally, whenever I tell my DCs it's a dream their reactions, even if not hostile, steal away a lot of the lucid dream. So unless it's my goal to converse with a DC about lucidity / to find a dream guide / to witness their reaction to realizing it's a dream (and so on), I just won't tell them and move on to my other goals...

You know, I think that reaction is what you could expect from pretty much any one in "the real life" if we said that this is just a dream. There is few people in "real life" who are curious enough to question their own reality beyond the whole "common sense attitude". Common sense is a great way to have as a safe foundation. But that's it. And I believe that "common sense" is what the DC's are rooted in, since they probably are most a reflection of our own thinking pattern.

Just to try things from another perspective: Imagine that a stranger came up to you and said "hey this is just a dream" or "non of this is real. You are not real either" how do you think that your natural reaction to that would be? Would it be a positive or a negative? My guess is that most people would get somewhat upset or feeling somewhat harassed in that moment. And since dreams in my experience is amplified feelings in general. That positive/negative reactions from DC's could just be that overreaction to one owns inner "truth" that what is real is real. But that doesn't mean that one's "truth" can be changed over time of course.

I had a common experience too ! That was funny. When I told them that I was dreaming my DCs started laughing at me funnily and they claimed that they knew it from the beginning. :\ I was angry and asked them why they didn tell me earlier . It happens and as friends said and described ( really perfectly ) its all about ur expectations. At times u feel u can't control their behavior but as soon as u realise u can they won't act the same. Thank u for ur post. I now remembered one of my lucid dreams n now I have 3 not two :P