Newb! Confused, Frightened?

Hey everyone, this is my first post so HI. I found this site after experiencing my first true lucid dream. (I might have had one where I was trying to take control of a flying ability but failed at it) Although, unlike many of you - I believe I was too frightened to take control of it. This is how it went down:


I was at the top of a very high building meeting with a boss. I was admiring the foggy, celestial like view of the city looking down. My boss asks me if I've ever seen anything like that. I said no. Suddenly, the building starts to spin (at this point I somehow realized I was dreaming and felt very awake), and the building begins to fall and eventually hits the ground - where everything faded to black and all I saw was two bright lights which then faded out. A voice said to me - "Find your way out if you want to go to heaven." I found myself holding someones hand (unrecognizable) as we tried to make our way out of what seemed to be a building with MANY MANY DOORS. My first reaction was to panic and look for my DAUGHTER in all doors. I opened ALL doors hysterically trying to find her and get her out. (All light switches in the hall were turned off)

My dream stopped here, but that's not what was so upsetting. The thing is, is that I was somewhat AWAKE while I was falling to my doom in the building, all throughout the rest of the dream I KNEW that I was dreaming. BUT I couldn't wake myself up! I tried to shake myself out of my dream but I just couldn't get out - it was almost as if I was frozen until my dream ended. HELP! (My wife saw that I was twitching and shaking during this)

I had no control over any of this, but I WAS THERE. Freaked me out

You woke up because you were panicking about finding your daughter. When you realize that you are dreaming just keep telling yourself that nothing can hurt you. One of the best way that I've learn to tell my friends about lucid dreaming is referencing the movie "The Matrix." Two lines in particular: "Everybody falls the first time" and "There is no spoon" If you've never seen The Matrix I'll explain them.

In the scene with the first quote Morpheus was trying to teach Neo how to jump between tall buildings. He had to let his mind go and forget about gravity, they didn't exist in the computer (your dream,) only in your mind. If you believe in gravity in your dreams you will fall, if you don't you will fly. I've never been able to fly in my dreams either, but I can jump very long and high distances. Needless to say Neo fell because it looked so real he couldn't let his mind go, that's what happened to you.

In the scene with the spoon quote a little girl was being a spoon with her mind. She handed the spoon to Neo and he couldn't bend it with his mind. The girl told him "Don't try to bend the spoon, that's impossible, only try to realize the truth." He asked her for the truth and she said "There is no spoon." Meaning what you see in the matrix (or your dream) are just electrical processes in the brain. Nothing is real, nothing can hurt you.

Remember these and your lucid dreams will be much less scary. Once you master the second one you will learn to even control your surroundings. I haven't gotten there yet, need more practice.

Hi misterG and welcome.

Many people think that instant and total control happens as soon as you gain lucidity. Sadly, that's not nessesarily the case and people get confused or afraid when they can't control anything.

Similarly, you can have a regular dream and have total dream control with no lucidity at all.

Like ninja said, you have to reaffirm in mid dream that there is nothing to be afraid of. Get control of your own self before trying to control the rest of the dream. With more practice you'll gain more confidence and more control. As often as I've LDed, I still have control issues in some of my lucids too. They are frustrating but also can be fun amusing.

Good luck getting lucid again.
:content:

Don't worry about your daughter, tell yourself that she's not in your dream, she's in her room. If you really want to see her say (don't just say, KNOW) that your daughter is behind one of the doors and know which one, open it and she will be there. That's how I find people, I go through a door.

Welcome to the forum! You've already gotten some good responses, so I won't answer your question. But, if you need anything, feel free to PM me!

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Originally Posted by Gwendolyn

Welcome to the forum! You've already gotten some good responses, so I won't answer your question. But, if you need anything, feel free to PM me![/b]

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I had no real control in my dream though, being my first - I felt real strange about it, although exciting. I will search around and see what you guys do. :) Thanks

Remember that - in your dreams - not only are you unable to sustain physical but others are even more impervious to being harmed. If you let your emotions overwhelm you your time can be ruined. Also, try to let your morals take back burner in that kind of dream situation. In real life, your daughter needs your help and attention but in your dreams things change. Your concern for her safety is natural but, as you learn more about dream control you'll realize that it's completely unfounded in the dream realm. In other words, she wasn't even there to begin with so there's no need to feel guilty or obligated to "save her". It doesn't make you a bad parent to be selfish in the dream realm.

However, as you gain control and perspective (that it's all in your mind and not real) you'll be more prepared to deal with such frightning circumstances in the future. Then you can foil the dangers, save your daughter AND transform the fallen building into a lovely theme park for you and your daughter to enjoy!

Next time you become lucid in a dream, try to tell yourself that you, and all others, are completely safe from harm. If you remain calm and fearless you can work wonders.

I know that's all a bit easier said than done but, with practice, you'll be able to master the conquering of dream fears.

Welcome to the forum.

Yeah