So I stumbled upon your website yesterday doing some research in an attempt to learn to control something that has occasionally occurred with me as long as I can remember.
My 1st recollections of attaining lucidity are from when I was pretty young. (pre-teens, I'm in early 20's now) I remember on probably half a dozen occasions having the 'flying' dream. And always when I had this dream I would realize mid flight (after I'd been flying around for a few minutes) that I was dreaming. However, within a matter of seconds after coming to this realization, the dream would end.
I haven't had this dream in many years, however over the last couple of months I have been finding that once a week or so I'll realize mid-dream than I am in fact dreaming, however unlike when I was younger I would not always immediately wake up. I didn't, until last night after reading your site, attempt any control over the dream, however I would just experience it knowing it was a dream for some time before awaking.
What finally brought me to do some research into this matter was an incident a couple weeks ago. I had aware I was having a dream, and after partaking passively in the dream for a period of time found cause to wake myself from it. However, when attempting to wake myself I instead woke into a nightmare. After being in this for a minute or two I again attempted to wake myself, however this time I was unable to.
This was the 1st time I had actually ever been unable to wake myself from a dream after realizing that it was in fact one. After trying for a period of time I was finally able to wake myself (just before something was about to kill me if I recall correctly), however after waking myself I was unable to move for a period of 5-10 seconds. It was like I had woken mentally, but physically my body was still asleep. At the time this was rather frightening, as I had no idea of the cause or duration, and this is what lead me to begin to search online.
Fast forwarding to the present, I found this sight last night and, reading through all of the main literature and a few of the tutorials, thought I would give it a try. Although I did grab a pen and paper before going to bed, I of course did not actually write down my dreams as I had them :\ I generally have an extremely hard time falling asleep at night (in bed 4-6 hours before actually falling asleep most nights), so once I finally was able to fall asleep I was, shall we say hesitant, to completely wake myself again to write my dreams down.
However from my recollection I had 4 separate dreams which I awoke after, the 1st two of which I don't remember in detail besides noting I was not at all lucid during them. The latter two however I was able to attain lucidity, at least for some time during, and for the most part remember the events in them.
The 1st of the two that I recall being lucid in, I became aware it was a dream almost the second that it began. The setting was in that of a game I play, however I was actually the character, not just playing him, so I instantly became aware it was a dream. My 1st thought upon this realization (besides sweet it worked), was lets see what I can do. However due to a combination I think of being over-excited, and not having a clear enough goal in mind, when I attempted to change the scene the dream ended.
I was able to successfully end the current scene, however it was while attempting to form the new one, I awoke. (I don't even remember what I was attempting to transform it into) I attempted to draw myself back into the dream, but was unsuccessful. The odd thing about this occurrence, was that the duration of elapsed time between when I last looked at the clock before falling asleep, to when I awoke after this was only 12 minutes if I recall correctly. From what I read that's not nearly enough time to even reach REM?
The second dream in which I was at least partially lucid occurred immediately after I fell back asleep following the 1st. This time however, the setting was much more normal and I participated in the dream for a good deal of time before finally becoming aware of it being simply a dream when I fell down what appeared to be a never-ending hole. (Actually my memories of this dream pre-lucidity are quite clear)
Again I attempted to control the surroundings, although this time the effects seemed rather odd (and are what ultimately made me decide to post). Again I was easily able to dissolve the existing scenario in the dream, however the results when attempting to create the new one were different. This time I picked a clear location from memory that I was familiar with, hoping to be able to reconstruct it without causing myself to wake.
I was able to build it to the point where I knew I was there, but visibly the location still didn't appear. Like I could clearly feel that that is where i was, but when I looked around everything was simply black. And any time I attempted to push harder to form the visual aspect of the dream, I would feel myself attempt to wake and have to concentrate to reform the dream.
This is where it got strange. Eventually after multiple tries and still being unable to fully form the location I decided to give up, and allow myself to wake. What I did not realize however, is that is that the world that I was awaking into was in fact still a dream. When I had been fighting to fully form one dream without waking up, I had actually been bouncing between one completely formed dream of waking up, and the dream I was attempting to form. (in essence the dream's dream)
Once i was out of the dream I had been attempting to form I realized upon looking around the waking up was just a separate dream. (And actually work from the shock of this) However at the time i had been putting too much effort into maintaining the dream I was attempting to form to notice the world I was exiting into was also a dream.
So, quite an experience for my 1st night of attempts? I'll give it another go tonight and see where I end up. (who knows, maybe I'll even actually write something down) I just wanted to throw that up there and get comments from those more experienced than myself. (Sorry for being so wordy)
Thx!
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