to Astaroth and anyone else needing one.
*
My dramatic ramble:
I don’t even know what just happened…
After spending almost all day watching a horror series (which was probably not the best idea) and, close to finishing the final part and having watched a very elaborate scene about death – around midnight – I heard something which might or might not have been a knock on my door. I figured it was probably something else as I was wearing over-ear headphones and couldn’t hear clearly, plus it didn’t sound quite right, so it was probably something else in the house. There followed other strange tapping, knocking sounds from the hallway. Of course I immediately tried to come up with explanations for it – my imagination likes to run away with me so it didn’t take long to start thinking about things like—“Could one of my parents have had a heart attack, and the other is trying to resuscitate them?” but imagining pounding instead of pressing down on their chest. The most (perhaps only) probable and rational explanation, though, was that someone was repeatedly opening and closing one of the doors in the house.
I paused the film and listened. The sounds carried on and on. After what at least seemed like a few minutes of this, I turned on the main light in my bedroom so that I could see into the hallway when I opened the door.
My mum was on her hands and knees in the dark a little further down the corridor. I could hear my stepfather snoring, already asleep, and there was no-one else in the house. Looking at my mum, I saw that there was something off about her expression and again I wanted to instantly jump to conclusions – something happened, something was wrong with her. What if she was having a stroke, or losing her mind? I really didn’t know what I would do in either of those situations – I started trying quickly to think. Immediately I asked her: “What’s going on?”
She muttered something almost incomprehensible; I could only make out the word “fall” and it only strengthened my suspicions that something was wrong. She got up, turned the light on in the hallway and walked closer towards me. Everything looked cartoonish and surreal in the new light and the weirdness of the situation. A little freaked out, I asked her again what happened, what was going on. She didn’t answer me, instead asking me the very same question.
I said: “You’re the one on the floor and making knocking noises; should I be the one asking you what’s going on?”
“No, you shouldn’t. It’s none of your business.” In a harsh tone.
(I guess she could have been trying to hide something, but it really didn’t look like that from the situation.)
“…how is it none of my business if there are strange sounds in the house at night and something could be going on?”
Then she tells me—“You’re being mean.”
…?
(at which point the pure confusion lent itself to a sudden but intense sense of aloneness in the world )
Finally she explained to me and showed me what happened. It was really simple – she went out of the room for a glass of water but something fell over inside the room and blocked the door, so she had to keep moving it backwards and forwards to get it open. She managed to open it while I was there and showed me the thing. But I wondered why she didn’t just explain this to start with. Still confused about the way she reacted, I went into the living room and sat down. A few moments later she came into the room and once more asked me what was going on. Then she reminded me of the time and went back to bed. I went back into my room.
I guess the lesson I should learn here is that I shouldn’t watch horror films all day, heh. Or perhaps there’s no lesson to be learned. Who even knows…was that seriously not a dream? Then, I wonder if there's a single thing in life that doesn't have the potential to seem that way, from one perspective or another.
(Stop thinking and go back to your horror movies, vasiona.)
Edit - I went back to the series and the video player froze so that the same snatch of dramatic music played over and over, the video moved in jerky frames and I couldn't close it down at first. Okay, that's really enough for tonight.
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