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    Thread: Rant and Rave, Cry and Complain

    1. #17126
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      rofl, Vasiona. I thought for sure you were going to end your post with "and then I woke up." hehee

      for everyone.

      Sivason, the saying "when it rains it pours" doesn't adequately describe the sorrows you've had- one so quickly after the other. I'm glad your mother isn't as bad off as you first feared and I hope she makes a speedy and complete recovery

      Sefalik, unless the world as we know it ends, the internet and games will still be here. Go crush those opportunities!

      My only rant is still my coils. I really hoped hubby would give in and take me to the mall today. He may do so tomorrow. If not, I have to suffer until Wednesday. The coil for my iStick Eleaf feels completely clogged. I've blown it out several times but nothing helps. If I crank the wattage up to 15.1 (the highest) it still feels clogged but I also get an abundance of juice in my mouth
      So I'm back to the Volcanos. A few days ago, I dropped about 4 coils into acetone and let them sit for about 24 hours. Then I dried them for the same amount of time. I didn't rinse them or anything. It tastes fine. But my seals are going so it tends to get gurgly and drippy. They'll do though. I also have my 2 $20. units. they only last a couple hours before the battery fails... and the clearomizer has a crack in it so it's bandaged but they'll do too.

      A rave is that I did 3 loads of laundry at the laundromat today.
      It's also been very warm today ( at all of 32 degrees lol). It's supposed to stay in the 30's until tomorrow night, but hopefully the ground will thaw enough to at least flush the toilet.

      Another rave is that my new computer is supposed to arrive on Tuesday

      I've been so restless for that machine. I got 2 more drawers cleaned out. My computer currently sits on a built-in Vanity desk. There's a huge mirror on the wall in front of it, lined on either side with 3 (each side) sockets for light bulbs. The electricity for them (the wiring in the wall itself) burned out eons ago so they've just been dust collectors. As I was cleaning drawers, I came across little balls of left over yarn and decided to make covers for those sockets. I didn't know if I'd like them, but it actually looks nice.
      i've also been on YouTube learning how to crochet flowers. I figured I'd use up some more yarn bits and make (??) hanging-down-decorative-do-dads for the wall. What I really want them to be, though, are decorative dust traps.
      I also need to get off my rump and crochet some rugs, ceiling guards (canopies?), whatever I can to reduce the dust in my room. It's ridiculous in here and I can't keep up with it all.

      I think I'll work on a canopy now (I have a slanted ceiling where the two part of the modular home come together at a peak).
      At least the internet is working a little better tonight.
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    2. #17127
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      I got home after finding out my mom likely has cancer (probably treatable) and found out my wife had accidently flooded half of my brand new hard wood floor that cost $5000- (on a mortgage) and the boards were starting to bow and some were buckling. I actually broke down and laid on the floor crying.
      Peace Be With You. Oh, and sure, The Force too, why not.



      "Instruction in Dream Yoga"

    3. #17128
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      Sivason man ... I don't know what to say, I sincerely hope everything turns out alright for you. Remember you've got the support of everyone at Dreamviews.

      Ah I guess I better do some ranting/raving, although its pretty paltry. Rant: Year 12 is building up and the homework is getting intense Not more than I can handle but It leaves little time or energy for anything else. Unfortunately it also takes away my LD ability from stress related lack dream recall or prioritizing study over daytime practice. Ah well, I knew what I was signing up for when I promised to try my best this year (albeit the circumstances).
      Rave: I'm feeling pretty good. Healthy (ish), relaxed (ish), about as happy as one can be after a weekend of study and sport (not that much but hey ). I'll be playing with thermite and ferrofluid/lego cars hopefully on Thursday as well so that will be pretty awesome.
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      “I don't think that you have any insight whatsoever into your capacity for good until you have some well-developed insight into your capacity for evil.”
      ― Jordan B. Peterson

    4. #17129
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      I hate teenagehood. I hate my teenage hormones. I hate highschool.

      Edit : I need to rant EVEN more. I always looked at this thread but never really wanted to rant but jesus christ, I feel like I need to rant so bad right now and I have nobody to rant to. I literally can't fit with anybody at highschool. The 2 friends that I have are so not similar to me, we just share the same hate for the same people. They are literally so happy and they suck the energy out of me and sometimes I just want to fucking punch them in the face until they bleed. I feel like everybody is staring and judging me at highschool and if I hear one laugh I ALWAYS assume it's about me so because of my paranoia I have social anxiety too so yay fucking highschool. In the breaks I just want to go and sit alone in the toilet and wait for the day to be over. Coming home is the most awesome moment of the week day for me. I CAN'T WAIT TO GRADUATE AND NEVER LOOK BACK ON IT. I have good luck with my homeroom teacher that is really understanding and helps me with my stuff. Ugh. I went to the psychologist and I was diagnosed with depression and got sent to the psychiatrist for meds but I don't think it's depression, most likely hormones because I am not constantly sad, it just jumps from happy to sad. I tried those stupid anti depressants called zoloft which only made me feel WORSE and suicidal even. Good luck for me I have a friend that was on many anti-depressants and zoloft too and she told me it was from these pills and stopped after 3 days of taking them. It's supposed to get worse before it gets better but I'm really afraid to take them, who knows what the hell I do since I won't be able to think rationally. I got prescribed xanax too and some wort pills but I don't want to become dependent on them but they make me feel so much more better. Because of the depression and anxiety I lost 1 week of school and I'm pretty sure this isn't the first and last week I'm gonna lose because of it. I feel so dumb and worthless and my thinking is so distorted because of my depression, I only have negative thoughts even though I am an optimistic person. I am not the type to rant to random people but I felt like I needed to get this out.
      Last edited by Miau; 02-22-2015 at 12:19 PM.
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    5. #17130
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      I am on the last day before I go back into my diet, and I am looking forward to it. The foods I eat off diet make me pretty sick. I don't gain too much weight, and it's been about 2 weeks off diet, but I feel really awful. I am also hungry all the time because foods high in carbs aren't very filling.

      Looking forward to a month of clean eating and working out again.

      I also have a stupendous headache, and I had the most vivid sex dream in a while yesterday.
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    6. #17131
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      More Sivason.

      Miau.

      My rant is stomach pain. Hubby and I went to Sam's Club and the pain hit me like a blow where my ribs meet. I had pain before that and the hypocondriac in me thought heart attack but I knew it was gas. The "blow" was intense. I told hubby I had to eat something then and there. We drove through KFC and after just 3 popcorn chickens, the pain went away. What.the.heck. We then went to the Mall and he bought my coils and then we ate sushi. And the pain returned only it was much less intense but hot. It felt almost like a heating pad was against the area. It's receded again. Weirdest attack ever.

      I think it was triggered by the 2 ibuprofens and single caffeine pill I took right before we left home. It had been a few hours since I had eaten anything. Friggin annoying as heck.

      Now I'm just sleepy. I went to bed at 3AM and woke up at 5 Craziness lol
      I think it's because 1) my computer is on its way and I'm eager for it and to get my room up to par for it 2) Spring is around the corner

      In any case... despite the rants and the pain, life is very good
      Now, it's time for bed.
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    7. #17132
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      ^ Also have dat stomach pain. Should probably get it checked. lol
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    8. #17133
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      Quote Originally Posted by Miau View Post
      I hate teenagehood. I hate my teenage hormones. I hate highschool.

      [...]
      Man, that sounded a lot like me. Even down to the number of incompatible friends and the brand of anti-depressants! On the subject of anti-depressants, I was told that they weren't going to work until at least a month of use. Still, I reacted much the same way you did. Taking them fucking sucked, but in my case it took a little longer. I took my pills for a couple of weeks until my parents started 'noticing' that I was 'happier' and it pissed me me off because I didn't feel it was true, so I stopped. I felt like it wasn't right, anyway, as there were numerous big, if hard to describe, problems in my life. Anti-depression medication is for treating a chemical imbalance. My brain was not out of balance (okay lol maybe a bit) - my life was. And medication doesn't change my or others' behavior. I don't know how to turn it around, though... In any case, graduating and never looking back was indeed awesome.

      Spoiler for simpsons quote:
      Last edited by Maeni; 02-23-2015 at 07:04 PM.
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    9. #17134
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      I would have kept taking the anti depressants Maeni but they made me feel worse than before. I don't think I could handle it. I seem to be doing good now.
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    10. #17135
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      Signed up for 'electrical engineering technology' today. The scheduling is actually about as close to perfect as it could be. The school is on my way home from work, so it's not even out of my way, and classes start at 7:30am. I get off work at 6:45, so it could be a little tight, but I MIGHT be able to move my shift ahead 15 minutes so that I'd be leaving at 6:30.

      But yea, I'm gonna have to manage my time down to the minute I think... or just not sleep. Classes end at 1:00, so I'd be home by 1:20. That leaves me with roughly 8.5 hours before I have to leave again for work, so time enough to eat, sleep, and eat. My cat is going to hate me. But I'll have weekends off. And--I can't believe I'm saying this--I might have to refuse overtime.
      Last edited by sefalik; 02-24-2015 at 07:35 PM.
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    11. #17136
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      Quote Originally Posted by sefalik View Post
      Signed up for 'electrical engineering technology' today.
      Electrical engineering is likely the most in demand field in this country today :
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    12. #17137
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      You, Sefalik, refuse overtime Sounds amazing. You'll definitely be extremely busy! Cats are normally very independent so your feline friend should be okay

      My rant is a kink in my neck. I've had it for 2 days but it's almost unbearable today. And I can't blame it on my iPad this time. I've been crocheting up a storm, making that "canopy". I'm right handed, but the kink is on the left side of my neck. The muscle is even inflamed on that side from the base of my head to just above my shoulders.
      Gah!
      I also discovered I can't take ibprofen at all any more. Why is that? How can I pop caffeine pills (in moderation- 3 throughout the day), but I cannot take a single ibuprofen without triggering agonizing stomach pain. Make.No.Sense.

      My new computer arrived on Tuesday, but hubby's holding off giving it to me until Thursday. He wants to hook it up at his place to make sure it wasn't damaged during shipping before sending it over here. I can live with that. Gives me more time to work on the canopy. I wont be doing anything at all, except gaming, once I get my beast

      Another rant is that I have to take Paula to the hospital this afternoon for surgery. The appointment was made yesterday. She seeing a doctor that my hubby says "I wouldn't let her treat a dog I was trying to get rid of." She's "killed" a lot of patients. BUT... it is the hospital we're talking about. Hubby's archenemies. I don't know how much he says is hyperbole and how much is real. But Paula's problem is VERY real. She smells like rotting flesh because of infected sweat glands or lymph nodes. They have to come out. Surely the doctor is competent enough to do that. But I'm torn. She's a bit of a hypocondriac. I don't want to tell her. But should I tell my daughter so she can decide whether or not to relay the warning?

      My rave is that... well, my computer came in Nothing else matters at this point in time

      Now time to find food...

    13. #17138
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      Quote Originally Posted by Miau View Post
      I hate teenagehood. I hate my teenage hormones. I hate highschool.

      Edit : I need to rant EVEN more. I always looked at this thread but never really wanted to rant but jesus christ, I feel like I need to rant so bad right now and I have nobody to rant to. I literally can't fit with anybody at highschool. The 2 friends that I have are so not similar to me, we just share the same hate for the same people. They are literally so happy and they suck the energy out of me and sometimes I just want to fucking punch them in the face until they bleed. I feel like everybody is staring and judging me at highschool and if I hear one laugh I ALWAYS assume it's about me so because of my paranoia I have social anxiety too so yay fucking highschool. In the breaks I just want to go and sit alone in the toilet and wait for the day to be over. Coming home is the most awesome moment of the week day for me. I CAN'T WAIT TO GRADUATE AND NEVER LOOK BACK ON IT. I have good luck with my homeroom teacher that is really understanding and helps me with my stuff. Ugh. I went to the psychologist and I was diagnosed with depression and got sent to the psychiatrist for meds but I don't think it's depression, most likely hormones because I am not constantly sad, it just jumps from happy to sad. I tried those stupid anti depressants called zoloft which only made me feel WORSE and suicidal even. Good luck for me I have a friend that was on many anti-depressants and zoloft too and she told me it was from these pills and stopped after 3 days of taking them. It's supposed to get worse before it gets better but I'm really afraid to take them, who knows what the hell I do since I won't be able to think rationally. I got prescribed xanax too and some wort pills but I don't want to become dependent on them but they make me feel so much more better. Because of the depression and anxiety I lost 1 week of school and I'm pretty sure this isn't the first and last week I'm gonna lose because of it. I feel so dumb and worthless and my thinking is so distorted because of my depression, I only have negative thoughts even though I am an optimistic person. I am not the type to rant to random people but I felt like I needed to get this out.
      Exercise. Improve your diet. Read more. Go to sleep early and wake up early.

      That's you're only option if you're not going to take the medication. Hell, you're going to need to do that even if you do take the medication. I've been on mood stabilizers for a while now so I know how frustrating that medicated feeling can be. But doctors prescribe them because they're the easiest way to help you deal with your problems. They're simply a support, not a solution. If you really want to turn things around, you have to make major lifestyle changes. Things won't get better until you make them better - slap anyone who tells you otherwise (including yourself on those days when you're low on motivation ).

      You can start by creating a schedule for yourself. This is mine on a typical day, but yours doesn't need to be as detailed:


      6:30 AM - Wake up, make bed, stretch
      6:35 AM - Brush
      6:40 AM - Wash up
      6:45 AM - Breakfast
      6:55 AM - Get dressed, grab keys
      7:05 AM - Go for a walk/jog
      7:25 AM - Head inside, free-time (usually spent reading, exercising, or napping)
      8:00 AM - Shave, groom, etc.
      8:20 AM - Shower
      8:25 AM - Dry off
      8:30 AM - Get ready
      8:35 AM - get dressed
      8:40 AM - Grab wallet, phone, books, pack lunch, etc.
      8:45 AM - Head to library to study, or school for class

      8:55 AM - First block
      9:45 AM - Break
      9:52 AM - Second block
      11:07 PM - Lunch
      11:52 PM - Third block
      1:00 PM - Head home

      1:15 PM - Put things away
      1:30 PM - Workout
      2:30 PM - Long shower/bath
      3:00 PM - Nap
      3:30 PM - Eat
      3:50 PM - Wash up, floss, etc.
      4:00 PM - Watch a movie, work on my gameplan for the remainder of the year

      6:00 PM - Tidy up around the house
      6:15 PM - Read or get everything ready for a study session
      6:30 PM - Have a snack, then get back to reading/studying

      8:00 PM - Dinner
      8:30 PM - Make tea, watch some tv with my parents
      9:00 PM - Take medication, then floss
      9:07 PM - Brush
      9:15 PM - Mouthwash
      9:20 PM - Free time
      9:50 PM - Get ready for bed
      10:00 PM - Pass out for the night
      I know it looks a little complicated, but it really simplifies everything. I just set those timers on my phone, and then let myself run on auto-pilot. It's hard to get into a new routine at first, but once you've worked out system that works for you, the anxiety just melts away - you're too focused on the one task at hand to worry about anything else. The schedule keeps me productive and I have way more fun than I used to because I'm not wasting my free-time on trivial shit that would just bore me in the long run. And if something comes up, like a social event or my friends want to meet up to get high, I don't have to worry about falling behind on anything because I can always fall back on the schedule once I'm done doing " Activity X."
      Last edited by GavinGill; 02-25-2015 at 09:38 PM.
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    14. #17139
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      Rant Still mad about my ex
      Rave Got an interview
      Rave Getting a bad ass computer soon
      Complain Gonna be broke for a while

    15. #17140
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      Excellent schedule and advice, Gavin!

      Auron. Grats on the computer. I'm in the same boat... as well as being broke for a while But the new computer is worth it.

      Which is my rave. I got it hooked up this evening with hubby. Took us forever and a day to find everything (speakers, power cords, mic, different attachment for the monitor ) but she's beautiful.
      I have a C and D drive for storage, which is going to take some getting used to- as will getting used to Windows 8.1

      Oblivion wont install on it properly though Once I get the computer over here, some time tomorrow, I'll just download it from Steam.

      My rant is that I was in a super foul mood all day. I slept from 8-11AM, took Paula in for her surgery, came home, went to the store, went home, picked Destinee up and took her to the store, went home, took Ray to counseling, then to the store, then picked the girls up and you guessed it... went to the store Got home, then went to see hubby and worked over there from around 8:30-midnight.

      Destinee was annoying the heck out of me. We didn't know about surgery until yesterday. Wednesday's are always counseling days. It is non-negotiable. I told her if Paula wasn't finished before I had to leave with Ray (it's about an hour's commute) then they would have to wait until I returned. She understood but then called all the flippin time trying to get me to put off counseling and then wondering what was taking so long getting home. I told her 8:00. I told her I would call once I got to the hospital. How is that hard to understand?
      but I was an idiot and kept answering my phone and now I have 7 minutes left . Which means, I'll have to buy cellphone time before I get a Steam card.

      I've also had a kink in my neck for several days. Today was better than it has been, but it's still annoying. AND my blood pressure was running high today; 147/101. What.the.heck.

      I have to take Paula back to the hospital later today for wound packing, but I'm otherwise free. Thank goodness.
      I'm going to get my computer moved over here and I'm going to game and sleep all day tomorrow. Except for taking Paula in, I refuse to go anywhere or do anything else. They can walk.
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      Oh my god... what the hell am I even doing here...

      Rant: Forever alone, deleted my online dating account (once again, for probably the seventh time or something) because it feels like such a chore just to log on and look AND no guys are replying back anymore, even when I reply back. I had a guy a few months ago I dated a couple times who I REALLY started to like, but he wasn't exclusive, and revealed he was already in a "serious" relationship with someone else. And I think to myself "every guy insists that it's EASY for girls to date. Then it must be a REAL failure if you can't get any action even as a girl". Of course, once in a blue moon there are a couple random yahoos who say "hey babe" who clearly have no proper grammar, punctuation or interest in anything other than sex, but to me, those don't count.

      In other news, I've gotten my new psychiatrist's permission to ramp off my anti-depressant, which I got REALLY super excited about, but then once I took only half my regular dosage for just that night, I immediately started freaking out and going into an unusual mad spiral about how alone, unloved and worthless I am and how I should just kill myself now. It got REALLY intense (I pretended to put a knife against my neck to see how it felt, and cried a fair amount). There are plenty of times when I forget to take any of the dosage for a day or so and nothing weird happens at all, so this event was definitely psychosomatic. It was my fear of change manifesting itself into one big bipolar reign of terror. It ended quickly, though. I'm ramping down on the medication with no problems...

      Except for the new problem, that is, which is running out of my OTHER medication (a mood stabilizer) and I can't get a refill for it, so I have to do a runaround to try to get it from my new psychiatrist and haven't gotten my dosage last night or tonight. Last night, yet again, I had a huge fear of going off this other pill, leading to a very similar rampage of worthlessness, fear and rage. It's so obvious that it's fear of change. I want to get off ALL my medications eventually. I imagine that this is what it's like for depressed people who start getting better, and they fear change, so that's why that time frame is when they're most likely to commit suicide. I got SO suicidal and crazy over just fear of not having enough pills, or going off the pills permanently.

      Rave: I am SO happy to be moving into our nice, big old house again, where I'll grow a HUGE organic garden and it'll all be so beautiful and wonderful in the summer. I've already got so many seeds sprouting at my windowsill now: eggplants, onions, flowers, pomegranates, lemons... I'm obsessed. I want this to be the biggest, most successful garden possible. I'd like to see just how self-sufficient I can get with the amount of food I grow (which will definitely be easier as a vegan now).
      DILDs: A Lot

    17. #17142
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      Quote Originally Posted by OpheliaBlue View Post
      You DO have veteran status tommo, your name is teal. And to check it, can you see the Community Team Forum on the main forum page? Let me know if you can't. As for the pictures that you can't see, do you mean pics in posts, or avatars or what.

      Complaint: I will never wake up at 3am for work again EVER. It's unnatural and meant to destroy.
      Sorry for late reply. O.M.G! I didn't even realise!
      Did you do that after I complained? Coz I seriously never noticed. I'm on to you....
      And yeah I can see the forum.

      I can't see pictures that are attached to people posts. Like if it's linked it's fine. But if it's attached it says "you do not have permission, please refresh or sign in or whatever".

      Quote Originally Posted by Zhaylin View Post
      My rant is that e-cig are killing my lungs I go through 30 ml at 12 mg a week and I wake up coughing moreso than when I smoked. That makes no sense. It's annoying me because I love vaping.
      This is a good thing. Some of the glycerin/propylene glycol will get in your lungs obviously, but it's good that it's clearing out, it means your lungs are actually working.
      Smoking paralyses these tiny hairs called cilia, which is what clean shit out of your lungs. Vaping doesn't, so they're probably just starting to work again.

      RANT: Goddamn I am such an idiot. I literally wasted the whole day. I'm finally trying to finish my isolation tank, and I bought these bricks, loaded them all in to my car, unloaded them, realised they won't work, loaded them back in and returned them. That took like 6 hours.

      I realised I should have just used sleepers like the ones that surround gardens and stuff because *that's what they're bloody build for*, holding stuff in.
      I just come up with all these ridiculous plans which fail miserably when I could just do something way more simple.

      I also should have used my 5 frikken months holiday to build this, instead of starting a week before I go back to school....

    18. #17143
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      Tommo: it was on 6/1/2013 lol. It's not automatic so I just communitify folks when I happen to notice it's been 5+ years for someone. Sorry I should have PMed you instead of sneaking into the night like that haha.

      DEERY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! /me faints
      My god I missed that avatar. Well and you too ofc. But that avatar wins.

    19. #17144
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      Quote Originally Posted by GavinGill View Post
      Exercise. Improve your diet. Read more. Go to sleep early and wake up early.

      That's you're only option if you're not going to take the medication. Hell, you're going to need to do that even if you do take the medication. I've been on mood stabilizers for a while now so I know how frustrating that medicated feeling can be. But doctors prescribe them because they're the easiest way to help you deal with your problems. They're simply a support, not a solution. If you really want to turn things around, you have to make major lifestyle changes. Things won't get better until you make them better - slap anyone who tells you otherwise (including yourself on those days when you're low on motivation ).

      You can start by creating a schedule for yourself. This is mine on a typical day, but yours doesn't need to be as detailed:



      I know it looks a little complicated, but it really simplifies everything. I just set those timers on my phone, and then let myself run on auto-pilot. It's hard to get into a new routine at first, but once you've worked out system that works for you, the anxiety just melts away - you're too focused on the one task at hand to worry about anything else. The schedule keeps me productive and I have way more fun than I used to because I'm not wasting my free-time on trivial shit that would just bore me in the long run. And if something comes up, like a social event or my friends want to meet up to get high, I don't have to worry about falling behind on anything because I can always fall back on the schedule once I'm done doing " Activity X."
      Wow, really good advice! Thanks GavinGill.. I will work on that!
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      Quote Originally Posted by OpheliaBlue View Post
      DEERY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! /me faints
      My god I missed that avatar. Well and you too ofc. But that avatar wins.
      Haha, thanks! I missed it too. I don't feel like changing it... ever. I also missed you guys, and actually using a forum, not just Facebook. Feels good, man.
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    21. #17146
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      Quote Originally Posted by DeeryTheDeer View Post
      Oh my god... what the hell am I even doing here...

      Rant: Forever alone, deleted my online dating account (once again, for probably the seventh time or something) because it feels like such a chore just to log on and look AND no guys are replying back anymore, even when I reply back. I had a guy a few months ago I dated a couple times who I REALLY started to like, but he wasn't exclusive, and revealed he was already in a "serious" relationship with someone else. And I think to myself "every guy insists that it's EASY for girls to date. Then it must be a REAL failure if you can't get any action even as a girl". Of course, once in a blue moon there are a couple random yahoos who say "hey babe" who clearly have no proper grammar, punctuation or interest in anything other than sex, but to me, those don't count.

      In other news, I've gotten my new psychiatrist's permission to ramp off my anti-depressant, which I got REALLY super excited about, but then once I took only half my regular dosage for just that night, I immediately started freaking out and going into an unusual mad spiral about how alone, unloved and worthless I am and how I should just kill myself now. It got REALLY intense (I pretended to put a knife against my neck to see how it felt, and cried a fair amount). There are plenty of times when I forget to take any of the dosage for a day or so and nothing weird happens at all, so this event was definitely psychosomatic. It was my fear of change manifesting itself into one big bipolar reign of terror. It ended quickly, though. I'm ramping down on the medication with no problems...

      Except for the new problem, that is, which is running out of my OTHER medication (a mood stabilizer) and I can't get a refill for it, so I have to do a runaround to try to get it from my new psychiatrist and haven't gotten my dosage last night or tonight. Last night, yet again, I had a huge fear of going off this other pill, leading to a very similar rampage of worthlessness, fear and rage. It's so obvious that it's fear of change. I want to get off ALL my medications eventually. I imagine that this is what it's like for depressed people who start getting better, and they fear change, so that's why that time frame is when they're most likely to commit suicide. I got SO suicidal and crazy over just fear of not having enough pills, or going off the pills permanently.

      Rave: I am SO happy to be moving into our nice, big old house again, where I'll grow a HUGE organic garden and it'll all be so beautiful and wonderful in the summer. I've already got so many seeds sprouting at my windowsill now: eggplants, onions, flowers, pomegranates, lemons... I'm obsessed. I want this to be the biggest, most successful garden possible. I'd like to see just how self-sufficient I can get with the amount of food I grow (which will definitely be easier as a vegan now).
      Welcome back! I cannot recall if I was around when you were or if I just saw old posts, but welcome back all the same.

      Rant: I had Jury Duty on Monday. I didn't know that my county has a "call for the week" where if I am dismissed from one case, I roll over to the next one until all juries are met.
      Rave: Doesn't matter!
      Rant: Because I got selected for the first jury. I am on Day 3, and it is really taxing.

      In other news, I am doing a lot of progress on what will be my second and possibly third novels. Publishers rejected the shit out of my first, and I had an agent tell me the plot, characters, and world were great, but I didn't describe enough of the world in a showing way. In other words, they want my story told in the same way everyone else does. I'm good.
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    22. #17147
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      Quote Originally Posted by Tiresias View Post
      I had Jury Duty on Monday
      Lucky, I've always wanted to serve on jury duty.
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    23. #17148
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      So nice to see you again Deery!

      Thanks for the info Tommo. I think dehydration could also have been playing a role. I posted to a vaper FB page and they recommended drinking more. I did, and the cough subsided. Huh.
      Your isolation tank sounds amazing. I've always wanted to try one

      Gavin.
      Tiresias is more like it Jury duty seems too stressful.

      I got my computer home, got both of them set up after working through some problems. Got to the store... again *sigh* and now my butt is planted. But now I'm too sleepy to play any games

      I'm also "weirded out" by a silly picture. #whiteandgold Destinee came back before the store and asked what color a dress was. I told her "black and blue." She said white and gold and I told her she was absolutely insane. I took a screen shot to show my hubby and he said white and gold then got annoyed at the questions (he needed a snickers bar hehe).
      I got home, finished working on the machines, relaxed a bit and then Destinee posted a gray pic on FB saying "problem solved" lol. Then I looked at the original again and saw white and gold. I read some, looked at the pic again and it's black and blue.
      What sort of sorcery is this!

      Some people say it's tied in with emotion, but I don't buy it. I think it would probably be more a contrast thing (looking at something bright or dark before seeing the pic, changes perceptions or some such).

      In any event, I'm going to sleep.

      Sweet dreams DV.
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      Quote Originally Posted by GavinGill View Post
      Lucky, I've always wanted to serve on jury duty.
      You really don't.

      A. You cannot talk about the case at all, even with your spouse.
      B. You are required to, and expected, to avoid all media.
      C. Any decision you make will result in the irrevocable change of a person's life. Decide the are guilty? They go to prison. Decide they are not guilty? They may have really been guilty, and you just unleashed them on the world with the knowledge of how to be careful.

      All this includes the fact that you cannot work your normal job while serving. My work is cool, but others aren't. They ask them to check in daily, and usually, don't pay them. You only get $25 per day at my court. Finally, the entire court process is nothing like TV or movies. It is very dry, boring, and slow, and the criminal cases are mostly the prosecutor painting evidence against one person, then the defense trying to create doubt over that evidence. They don't have to prove their client's innocence, just prove the evidence is not 100% sound.
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      I am so glad I wasn't picked for jury duty. I just missed the cutting block. *phew* My knowledge of jury duty is all I've gleaned from crime dramas and 12 Angry Men, but I'm sure it's not nearly as interesting as the movie.
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