Thread: Rant and Rave, Cry and Complain

I hate how spiders don't understand that entering my home is suicide.

Originally Posted by TimeDragon97

I hate how spiders don't understand that entering my home is suicide.

And flies

Originally Posted by tommo

Same. Just remember you will be saying the same thing 10 years from now if you don't start changing now, so you can decide to be like "fuck it, I've screwed up everything" or actually do something. It's never too late, as cliche as that phrase is, just be glad you have the insight to realise it at 21 instead of when you're 40 and have a mid-life crisis.

Good luck, guys. I fucking hate hindsight! Where was that information when it mattered?

I hate this damned overpowering pains I've been getting these last few days... I can't work properly, I can't rest properly, I can't f****** practice my lucidity and recall which sucks because I'm really constantly pumped up and excited about it lately. I've got time, a lifetime actually, not going anywhere. I made my mind about this practice but that doesn't mean I can't get mad about it, I want consistency, I'm in to get it and my body just decides to cut me short for a little while (we'll see). The reason I can't keep up my practice properly is because from the moment I wake up to the moment I lay down (with few breaks in between) my back starts killing me, yeah right. It's a spine minor issue with an extremely painful outcome.
It's all good, I actually don't care all that much.
Is it not awesome freely ranting and being provided a specific place to do so? Man I love DreamViews.

Is that my boyfriend out mowing the yard at 9:40pm? It sure is!

Originally Posted by Linkzelda

^^^^ This so much. Sometimes I wonder if it's a bad idea when older people tell us younger people that it's about having experience before we realize the lesson behind whatever it is they're telling us, I always figured it's best to start analyzing why they would tell us "you'll find out when you're older". Especially when they want us to not make the same mistake, if they tell us the concept early (or we find the concept ourselves early), and we figure it out BEFOREHAND, we won't be like them in their 40s repeating the same mistakes. Even though it might make us think we know everything, at least we're attempting to really, really, really speed up the learning process. Even though it might not relieve us from every single future problem, at least we have one or few more problems off our shoulders right?

Ehhhh, I agree in a way, unfortunately I have found that even when multiple older people warn me about some things that pretty much everyone falls in to, even if I accept what they're saying, I never really REALISE it, or integrate it in to my consciousness, if you will, until I have gone through it myself.

If we can ever get telepathy and are able to transfer experiences to other people with the emotions involved, I think this will help advance humankind more than anything else.
At the moment, pretty much everyone has to go through the same things and learn the same things, and maybe come to different conclusions.
This holds back our advancement ridiculously.

Same with just learning different subjects, I mean anyone pursuing a PhD has to learn everything from the past couple of centuries about that topic, and it takes around 30 years (from birth learning simple things, to primary school, then high school and finally undergrad and then PhD).
Then they get maybe 30 years to put that knowledge to use before they die.
And we're only getting started as well, I can imagine in another 20 or 30 years, it will take even longer to learn everything we've discovered about a subject.
It's not sustainable.

Sort of got off track there....

Originally Posted by Lucid_boy

Good luck, guys. I fucking hate hindsight! Where was that information when it mattered?

Heh, as I was saying, I think, as long as you have some responsible adults in your life, or just people older than you (including on the internet in discussions), they have probably told you a thousand times, but you never really fully realise it until you go through it yourself. So that info is probably there, for most people anyway.
I think it probably also has to do with not knowing who to trust for advice. I often dismissed a lot of things because I didn't think the situations were the same, or whatever.
And a lot of things people tell you are just straight up bullshit. So yeah....

Good luck to you too!

Originally Posted by Micael

I hate this damned overpowering pains I've been getting these last few days... I can't work properly, I can't rest properly, I can't f****** practice my lucidity and recall which sucks because I'm really constantly pumped up and excited about it lately. I've got time, a lifetime actually, not going anywhere. I made my mind about this practice but that doesn't mean I can't get mad about it, I want consistency, I'm in to get it and my body just decides to cut me short for a little while (we'll see). The reason I can't keep up my practice properly is because from the moment I wake up to the moment I lay down (with few breaks in between) my back starts killing me, yeah right. It's a spine minor issue with an extremely painful outcome.
It's all good, I actually don't care all that much.
Is it not awesome freely ranting and being provided a specific place to do so? Man I love DreamViews.

With back pain, apparently lying down is the worst thing you can do. Put a bunch of pillows or clothes or something under your torso so that you're inclined, may help.


Also Cry: I have no idea what to think anymore....

Thanks bud, fortunately I feel way better today... *uff* what a relief. Last night I even had a killer sexy time LD and a strong non-SP HH event, strong as in mistaken for reality. This is especially cool because the other day I also had a more or less spontaneous WILD just by sleeping on my back which I never do because that's where nightmares come from (or so I thought since childhood thus now working like a charm). I've never been much of a WILD guy with only one or two recalled events in the past with dozens and dozens of DILD's, seems like I'm getting promoted (jk) haha

Is this the place to rave btw? «.«

Originally Posted by tommo

Ehhhh, I agree in a way, unfortunately I have found that even when multiple older people warn me about some things that pretty much everyone falls in to, even if I accept what they're saying, I never really REALISE it, or integrate it in to my consciousness, if you will, until I have gone through it myself.

If we can ever get telepathy and are able to transfer experiences to other people with the emotions involved, I think this will help advance humankind more than anything else.
At the moment, pretty much everyone has to go through the same things and learn the same things, and maybe come to different conclusions.
This holds back our advancement ridiculously.

Same with just learning different subjects, I mean anyone pursuing a PhD has to learn everything from the past couple of centuries about that topic, and it takes around 30 years (from birth learning simple things, to primary school, then high school and finally undergrad and then PhD).
Then they get maybe 30 years to put that knowledge to use before they die.
And we're only getting started as well, I can imagine in another 20 or 30 years, it will take even longer to learn everything we've discovered about a subject.
It's not sustainable.

Sort of got off track there....

No no, you're right tommo, you didn't get off track, because that's exactly what I was thinking as well with how much we "have to go through" in learning and only having so little time expressing our new role in being experts or just intellectual about a particular field of study. I sincerely feel that there are people that could dominate any person with a PhD, and seeing how I gathered some insight from a few PhD students, most of the work they did to accomplish that was just a Completion grade to them.

Just finding how we can retain all the information we learned, and keeping our minds sharp and on edge, it's truly difficult to do, but I feel things like Lucid Dreaming can help tremendously. Of course, with people who think Lucid Dreaming is demonic and what have you, if people could just for once see that if they really wanted to step their game up a bit, they would see something that occurs naturally in their minds while sleeping could have so much potential in sustaining one's ability to just remember and continue learning.

I often find myself going to a certain forum, and the questions people ask for that forum's general theme, I sometimes wonder what it is that makes these people hold back, they're so intelligent, but it's because they're distracted with feeling inferior inside. It's mostly about getting a person at ease with themselves so that when they're in a calm and confident behavior, they have less distractions, they start processing the learning much faster and efficient on an unconscious level, and they can truly shine and contribute to the community.

It's amazing how every one of us has this potential to become sharp and intellectual in many things, it's just a matter of getting those distractions (the trivial and petty ones) being less of our concern. And with people pursing a PhD, I feel it's not only just for trying to get a job, but mostly for just impressing and/or satisfying their parents or their friends. But as time goes by maybe 10 to 20 years, their status with the PhD isn't going to matter since their work experience is more important; those same people they tried to impress will be more bothered with their own lives by then, and all that person can do to make themselves feel accomplished is focusing on appreciating themselves and what they achieved. That's why I felt the whole college vibe and how I looked around people that were blind and misguided in what they're doing...it made sense how degrees are just cosmetics now.

Sure they help tremendously with giving off a better authority status, but when I find people and know for sure there are people who have more knowledge and intellect than a PhD student (work-wise and just in general), it's because of how we have to give impressions of authority (with degrees and such) that prevents these non-PhD people to truly shine.

I often get mindfucked when I see someone with a PhD get 60k per year when a non-PhD or non-degree individual gets a $120,000 salary per year for a Security job.

For the last three years I've been bugging about not being able to have an entire day to do everything I want to do. An easy, yet immensely fulfilling day where I can get away and sort a few things out, then (in a sense) close one chapter and open the next. And today (well yesterday, since it's 7:25 AM atm) I finally did it. Even slept in until 2:15-ish in the afternoon, had three smoke sessions, took three, naps, and three long showers; and I still managed to get everything done despite all the downtime.



It was fucking perfect. >:I

Originally Posted by Linkzelda

I often get mindfucked when I see someone with a PhD get 60k per year when a non-PhD or non-degree individual gets a $120,000 salary per year for a Security job.

because now it's martial law century, whoever joins anything connected to law enforcement/military automatically gets higher pay, but i advise not to join, they are 100% corrupted bastards, lost my job many times to security because i was doing my job right and i was accused for things i didn't do only to have an excuse to fire or lay me off.
Now i can't find a job because of previous security companies laid me off and there's NO jobs out there now. It's ALL fucked up. I now feel like Alex jones in joker mode.
"RISE UP, BECAUSE THE JOKES ON THEM!! IT'S ALL ON THEM! EVERY STINKIN BIT OF IT!! LETS GET FIRED UP! LET THEM KNOW WE ARE NOT SLAVES!!!!!"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TCHJ...Bhsv4v&index=4

Deeeeaaaaar Facebook,
Would you kindly stop advertising engagement rings on my page? It's depressing and annoying.

Great i wake up 3am, my daughter woke me up because she is up. I know i had dreams but i keep waking up like 3 + times during sleep and forget my dreams! I know every time i wake up i feel happy and great because of the dream, now i am waking up not knowing why i wake up feeling happy but i know it's about D.G.
Seems like we are communicating more, but i'm not recalling well, urgh.

Yes, I'm an idiot!

Is saying you are wrong or should you use you're instead. I know that in some circumstances you are is the only option, but I was just wondering. Since this is not my native language, I'll be using that as my excuse for this retarded question.!

This question is pissing me off, so I guess that counts as a complain. (+ I didn't want to create a topic just for this. )

I can never do an FILD because I'm never tired enough. That's right; I'm pissed because I get proper amounts of sleep.

Originally Posted by TimeDragon97

I can never do an FILD because I'm never tired enough. That's right; I'm pissed because I get proper amounts of sleep.

Interrupt your sleep to try then.

But by all means be pissed at will!

Originally Posted by Ekyu

Yes, I'm an idiot!

Is saying you are wrong or should you use you're instead. I know that in some circumstances you are is the only option, but I was just wondering. Since this is not my native language, I'll be using that as my excuse for this retarded question.!

This question is pissing me off, so I guess that counts as a complain. (+ I didn't want to create a topic just for this. )

They mean exactly the same thing. "you're" is just short for "you are" so whichever you use you're never wrong. "You're" is generally used in more casual circumstances, while "you are" is taken to be a bit more formal and serious.

I don't want to do this anymore. I miss having normal interests. Can't I go back to how things were before? ._.

I CAN'T FUCKING SLEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!

And now I'm working my way up a recall dry spell. Damn body, look at what you've done. -_-

The skatepark is soaked. I can't wait till fall.

I'm so very nervous right now. A few days ago I hung out with a couple friends, one of whom was sick. She looked totally miserable, and apparently she got it from her boyfriend who had it a week before. Today I've felt uncomfortably warm and sweaty all day, and about an hour ago I started getting these sharp stomach pains. I hadn't eaten much throughout the day, but... it still doesn't make me feel very good. >_>;;

Rant: My life has been a waste. I haven't done a damn thing other than chase highs since I was a little kid. All I ever wanted to do was learn everything about myself personally that I possibly could, learn everything about the brain in general that I could, try everything I could get my hands on, learn all the best techniques, and put myself in all the ideal situations to completely maximize my euphoria at all times. Well here I am. I know more about myself than I ever thought it was possible to know. I've been researching the brain frequently since middle school and now I've fucking run out of things to research, I've figured out everything I ever wanted to short of actually picking one apart in a lab. I've tried more drugs than I used to think even existed, and higher doses of those drugs than I once thought survivable. I got good enough at becoming lucid that all I ever had to do was want one to happen and nothing else, and it would. I practiced sexual meditation so much that I can induce my own toe-curling euphoria from thought alone. I used my knowledge of myself and the brain along with these experiences to reach new plateaus of ecstasy that I never even conceived of before. I found clubs, illegal raves, crack houses, and BDSM dungeons where I was and am welcomed like family. I got myself into situations where I'd never have to pay to get high again if I didn't want to. I fucking did it. I made it here just like I always wanted to.

And what do I have to show for it? I'm a hypochondriac, paranoid, and anxious. There's a constant existential crisis running in the background of my mind. I have strange tics and obsessions. I have a more addictive personality than anyone else I've ever known. None of the drugs work anymore, and the few that do give me panic attacks and headaches. I've become bored with lucid dreaming and turned it into a fantasy escape which only makes me feel worse when I wake up like everything else. I have lots of useful sexual techniques, but no one special to share them with. I'm filled with regrets for things I did while basically manic. I'm frequently physically and mentally uncomfortable because I feel like I need constant stimulation to survive. I have mood swings like crazy. My moments of emotional highs are probably more fulfilling than most peoples' just based on how I feel compared to how other people act, but when they're not happening I tend to shift between an incredible emptiness and a crushing sadness. Meanwhile, my grades in school are terrible and I don't really retain any of the information from my classes. I have no future in mind and nothing I seriously I want to do. I've never had a job. I'm so unmotivated that I find it difficult to get off of the couch every day. When I do manage to get up and walk around it's usually because I have loads of anxious information and the amount of thinking I'm doing is driving me crazy. Day after day I think about making changes for the better in my life and they never come to pass, which makes me hate myself more and more. I spend my entire life feeling trapped by both myself and the world around me.

A couple weeks ago I started really getting out of the house for once. Going to movies, concerts, events, and getting more exercise, swimming often, and so on. I stopped smoking weed or really caring to track my dreams, or focusing on my visualizations that I do just for pleasure, or really using much of the internet at all, and I felt so much healthier. So many little addictions dropped all at once and it just got better and better. I even thought about taking a break from DV to add to it because I knew that it's still one of them as well, much as I would like to deny it. I figured that keeping any addictions around at all would be a risk factor, so I seriously considered it, but then I ended up sticking around when I got wrapped up in a couple interesting conversations. As a result of that my brain research sort of exploded, and I feel that I literally have peaked now. I wasn't kidding in my first paragraph, I'm done. There's no great mysterious left that seriously interest me anymore, it would just be tiny things here and there. I'm at a loss because researching things is actually probably one of my strongest addictions of all, if not the strongest. But I realize that this just furthers what I've been building up to all this time. The only thing left to consider is that even when I got what I wanted out of those discussions, I didn't leave. I'm still here browsing DV randomly with no goal in mind, and the more I'm on it, the less I'm doing those things that were making me so happy. That's why I know what I have to do now.

TL;DR: I'm leaving DV. Probably for a long time. I'm not going to miss this opportunity to finally stabilize my life and get to the point where I can make something of it. I wanted to stick around even while dropping everything else, but it's not an option. It's all or nothing.

I'm posting a little bit more formal of a goodbye in the thread for it along with how to contact me, so in case anyone wants to know check it out here: http://www.dreamviews.com/lounge/718...ml#post2032262

As always, I love you all and I'll miss you dearly. Goodbye, everyone, and good luck with your lives.

Farewell Lyz! Which is not to say goodbye, at least not permanently, but to say literally I hope you fare well.