Thread: Rant and Rave, Cry and Complain

So I started that new job last week. Nothing but drama, gossip and bitchiness. SMH

Quit on Monday. Picked up final check today. Interview for better paying job tomorrow.

if you think your car is worth two parking spaces in the front of the lot... i will park inches from your door.

Rant? Every are moving so slow today. It's like everything is moving in slow-motion.

Rave!!! The interview went very well. I'll be making $4 an hour more than the job I just quit! Roflmao.

My new hobby is going on facebook and feeling miserable about everyone else's lives being better than mine.

Facebook is everyone's highlights. You don't see the boring in between.

Rant: I am an idiot. I can't pay attention to one thing at a time. I should start meditating again.
I was riding my motorbike today, obviously not paying full attention to the road, of course, looking at the footpath etc.
Look back to the road, car is stopped in front of me, slam on my brakes, it's wet, I hit the ground and my bike possible hit the car
but neither of us were really sure whether it did or not.

Leg is sore, clutch and gear levers are bent, handlebars are bent.

Don't have enough money to deal with this shit. I understand the Zen philosophy more and more the last few years.
The more you have, the more effort you need to expend to keep those things. And the more you worry about them.
Too bad public transport sucks here.

They're now gonna waste money on a 24 hour public transport trial for a year. Where half the trains will have like 10 people on them at night/early morning.
Yep, do that instead of actually making good trains, tracks and routes. Good job guys!

Yikes!!! Glad you're okay, Tommo.
Grants and hugs to everyone else (and to you too, Tommo )

My rant is that my hotsy-totsy new computer has died. I gave up on sleep and went back to my machine to the DV page I left up (my last post). But I noticed the time on my machine was wrong. It was froze. I hard rebooted it and my monitor never came up again. My computer tries to come on. The fan starts up but then there's a continuous beep/beep/beep......, then the computer shuts down and gets stuck in a cycle of not completely starting and beeping while it does.

My old computer won't come up either. I got it set up and it finally turned on 'start normal or repair'. I chose repair and the monitor (a different one from the new computers) never showed a screen again. The fans don't even start up for the old machine.

So I am now stuck with my iPad. Thankfully, I have anything at all. I have a headache and my eyes are killing me (allergies) and someone drank 75% of the only coke I had in the fridge
I'm going to call tech support for my new machine either later today or tomorrow. Probably tomorrow. I just want to do nothing but hide and grumble today.

Life is shit. I have rants everyday and I never get round to writing them here because they just manifest themselves into sadness that sits over my head like a thunderous cloud ready to break at any moment.

Rant - my boyfriend broke up with me on Saturday night because we both got mad and said stuff we didn't mean

Rave - I had a huge party on Saturday night for my dad's 50th and got super drunk

Rant - Family kept asking to meet the boyfriend of mine who wasn't coming

Rave - I got invited to stay with a friend in London because I was upset

Rant - The guy I was supposed to start dogsitting for on Sunday told me to get there between 8-30 and 9 am. He text me at 9-10 to tell me I was too late and it wouldn't have been fair to leave the dog on her own for that long if they had left at 3am as they were supposed to (for 10 fucking extra minutes?!) and that they were taking her with them. Could have understood this if I had been an hour late but not turning up 10 minutes after you told someone to arrive is a little bit crappy man. So there goes the £200 I was using for uni

Rave - We got back together on Sunday morning after we both realized we were wrong (one a lot faster than the other) and have started playing board games

Rant - Went out to feed the horses said boyfriend is looking after and he lost the key and thought one of the horses had eaten it after spending 45 minutes searching through grass for key.

Rave - I found said key, got bought a McDonalds for my brilliance.

Rant - Parents keep going away when I'm at work so I can't invite anyone over to spend the night with me because I don't finish till 10 and I hate having nights alone.

Rave - Booked a trip away to a theme park for said boyfriends birthday. Super excited, we both really enjoy this place and, in the slim chance things don't work out between us, the tickets are in my name so I can take a friend with me if plans with him fall through

Meh - Results come out in a week. Bricking it.

Wow. ,Wishful. Lots of ups and downs. Hope there are many more ups in your future and that you have a blast at the theme park

Rave: Got the old computer up and running. I moved it back to its old spot and it came right on. Part of me wonders if there's a problem with my multi-cord. Both computers had the same issue of trying to start but not quite making it. BUT, I have other things plugged into the multi-cord (what the heck are those things called again?) It has 6 sockets available and I added a smaller (3 socket) extender just because one plug wont fit between the others but the extender does. Only 5 of the 6 are used. Only 1 of the 3 is, so I don't think it's overloaded. One of the things plugged into it is a light.
If there was a short or something, the light would flicker- right? So, it does and does not make sense that the multi-cord is the problem.

When I was trouble-shooting the new computer, I was unplugging and re-plugging components to make sure everything was connected internally.
One thing I unplugged was actually 4 things. I *think* they're just for the LD lights. But I don't dare hook my new computer up until I figure out exactly how those 4 things plug back in. They're little things that go onto these nubby prongs. Nothing is clearly marked and there's no colors to reference either.

I'll try to tackle that tomorrow.

I forgot how SLOWWwww this machine is But it's something at least.

Originally Posted by Anju

My new hobby is going on facebook and feeling miserable about everyone else's lives being better than mine.

Maybe you otter be reading "Dear Abby" ..There are some pretty miserable people on here

Originally Posted by Zhaylin

Wow. ,Wishful. Lots of ups and downs. Hope there are many more ups in your future and that you have a blast at the theme park

Rave: Got the old computer up and running. I moved it back to its old spot and it came right on. Part of me wonders if there's a problem with my multi-cord. Both computers had the same issue of trying to start but not quite making it. BUT, I have other things plugged into the multi-cord (what the heck are those things called again?) It has 6 sockets available and I added a smaller (3 socket) extender just because one plug wont fit between the others but the extender does. Only 5 of the 6 are used. Only 1 of the 3 is, so I don't think it's overloaded. One of the things plugged into it is a light.
If there was a short or something, the light would flicker- right? So, it does and does not make sense that the multi-cord is the problem.

When I was trouble-shooting the new computer, I was unplugging and re-plugging components to make sure everything was connected internally.
One thing I unplugged was actually 4 things. I *think* they're just for the LD lights. But I don't dare hook my new computer up until I figure out exactly how those 4 things plug back in. They're little things that go onto these nubby prongs. Nothing is clearly marked and there's no colors to reference either.

Two of those are for LEDs, one is the ON button, the other restart. That's your problem
There should be little words on there saying what they do. There will be a + symbol or a dot, or a line/bracket etc. next to the word, indicating which pin is for which function.
It's possible you plugged the power one in to the reset one so it's just continually resetting.

Wanna post a pic of them? I've only ever seen them marked in those ways, but it could be different.

Edit: OH! I had SP last night! It was the most trippy I've had it. I realised I've had it before just now, a couple of times, but not as intense.
I usually feel something moving my bed/shaking it etc.
Last night I felt that, but something was pushing my bum and moving my whole body up in the bed. I was like wtf????
And then I "realised" it was a cat, thinking how the hell did the cat get in my room?
Realised it was SP and calmed down, then I heard this slightly evil cat meow twice and then it disappeared.
I still had visual hallucinations when I opened my eyes to see if I could see anything cool.

It was quite beautiful. Some sort of black, fractured pieces with an intricate white, line design over the top.
The darkness of it, shadows etc. fit perfectly with my room, it's like it was right there in front of me.
I closed my eyes and saw it again and it had bits of blue and yellow designs on it too.

That was awesome. Proof people don't need to get freaked out by SP!

Although I must say that I can see how people believe spiritual/supernatural things are real.
I really felt like the cat was my old cat which disappeared suddenly, came back once and then left for good.
Maybe some sort of cat spirit. Or maybe he's still alive and just came to visit me astrally or something.

I don't feel like I belong here anymore because I haven't even tried for a Lucid in over a year. I, however, refuse to leave.

heh, Wishful, I've never been a lucid dreamer. I mean, I've had a few by chance and one through trial for a task of the month thing, but other than that- nope.

Tommo, the problem started BEFORE I opened the machine up. I'll try to post some pics tomorrow.
My computer froze then wouldn't come all the way on once I force quit. I opened it up first to check the dust levels and then to make sure everything was plugged in. It was then that *oops* I pulled out those things and don't know where they go now
Hopefully, the manual will have a diagram I can figure out.

Awesome SP, Tommo. I rarely ever get the cool ones. Most of the time, I come to and realize it's an SP right away then fall back to sleep They don't freak me out.

My rant is that Mr. Monthly should make an appearance today. I really don't want to have to deal with that. BUT- considering I leave for Early's Auction on Wednesday, it's better now than then!!!
My sleep has been really screwed up for almost a month now. I feel like I'm in my 20's again, where I could only sleep when I was falling over exhausted I need to start taking my Cypro every night around 11 so it could help me be asleep at a reasonable hour. But, seeing how I don't even FEEL awake until 7PM, it annoys me to go to sleep again so soon.

A rave is that hubby and I went to the movies earlier. We watched the new Mission Impossible movie. I was pretty good

Originally Posted by Zhaylin

Yikes!!! Glad you're okay, Tommo.
Grants and hugs to everyone else (and to you too, Tommo )

My rant is that my hotsy-totsy new computer has died. I gave up on sleep and went back to my machine to the DV page I left up (my last post). But I noticed the time on my machine was wrong. It was froze. I hard rebooted it and my monitor never came up again. My computer tries to come on. The fan starts up but then there's a continuous beep/beep/beep......, then the computer shuts down and gets stuck in a cycle of not completely starting and beeping while it does.

My old computer won't come up either. I got it set up and it finally turned on 'start normal or repair'. I chose repair and the monitor (a different one from the new computers) never showed a screen again. The fans don't even start up for the old machine.

So I am now stuck with my iPad. Thankfully, I have anything at all. I have a headache and my eyes are killing me (allergies) and someone drank 75% of the only coke I had in the fridge
I'm going to call tech support for my new machine either later today or tomorrow. Probably tomorrow. I just want to do nothing but hide and grumble today.

Sometimes if you clean the fans, it will start. I know how you feel though. I had to write my whole new resume via tablet then change it to PDF then attach it to an email to send it off. Took quite a bit of time, but hey...I know how to do something new.

Originally Posted by Wishfulthinker

I don't feel like I belong here anymore because I haven't even tried for a Lucid in over a year. I, however, refuse to leave.

I haven't tried since i've been here.

I'm only here for RRCC and senseless banter

I've been trying to LD again lately. Alcohol gets in the way a bit. I'm getting close though.
But yeah I've been here for over 8 years and had maybe 20 LD's. Pathetic lol

I had a really good trip recently and worked through a lot of feelings of insecurity and frustrations while seeing some really cool stuff.

Originally Posted by woblybil

Maybe you otter be reading "Dear Abby" ..There are some pretty miserable people on here

Or head over to reddit.com and read up on all the terrible things that have happened to so many people.

Rant: TYPOS! So many typos. Every one of my posts on DV is FULL OF TYPOS. I look like a grammatical idiot! I have to edit each post 5 times to get rid of all the "it's" for "its", "they're" for "their," etc. I KNOW grammar, I know how to spell, I'm a *great* proofreader, so why does it come out of my fingers wrong? I'm a fairly fast typist and I have a lot of dream recall so I have to type fast (it took me 3 times to get that "fast" right: it kept coming out as "asft") to get my DJ entries done without taking all day. Then I spend all day editing the absolute SEA of typos. Its terrible (haha, [sic])!

Originally Posted by tommo

I've been trying to LD again lately. Alcohol gets in the way a bit. I'm getting close though.
But yeah I've been here for over 8 years and had maybe 20 LD's. Pathetic lol

Rave: I had an epic LD last night (in my DJ). I work hard on LD practice, dream recall, etc., and it still feels like the great dreams are too few, too far apart. FryingMan's "3 D's" of lucid dreaming: diligence, determination, dedication. It's like becoming skilled at anything: it takes thousands of hours of practice, skills build up slowly over the months and years. You have to stick through the dry spells (hard, very hard, doing steady day-long practice for 4 weeks with no lucids, and still maintaining a positive attitude?...hard!).

Lucid dreaming is perhaps the most challenging of all disciplines: it's entirely inside your head, and you're totally alone. Sure, you can get advice, but it's never direct advice, it's always running through the filter of your interpretation of what's going on. Boy oh boy, wouldn't I *love* to do a WILD dive with Sageous there inside my head with me, correcting my unproductive responses, nudging me this way and that, saying "this is *exactly* what you need to do: a, b, c, etc., "Hey, there that's the dream, now follow me and enter it like this!"

Yeah, alcohol and from what I read, weed really mess with dreaming. You must decide what you want more. I basically gave up all drinking (I was only a light social drinker to start with, but I starting saying "no" to my wife's "let's have a little night cap" suggestion on vacation, too (I've since started saying "yes" more, but always keeping the amounts low).

The first step in having great, frequent LDs is making the decision that you want it, and if you do, doing whatever it takes for as long as it takes (note: it's a lifelong journey!). Like ThreeCat quotes in his signature:

"My advice to you is not to undertake the spiritual path. It is too difficult, too long, and is too demanding. I suggest you ask for your money back, and go home. This is not a picnic. It is really going to ask everything of you. So, it is best not to begin. However, if you do begin, it is best to finish.”

--Chogyam Trungpa

So if you're serious about wanting it, come on over to the DVA DILD class, open up a workbook thread, and fogelbise and I will do our best to guide you to help you maximize your dreaming potential.

today has been the worst day i've had in years, right now I just wanna go home and cry myself to sleep

Originally Posted by Wishfulthinker

Relapsing back into my old shit again *sigh* It's gonna be a long night

Aaaaand we're back here again! Joyous.

^^turn that frown upside down!

Originally Posted by FryingMan

Rave: I had an epic LD last night (in my DJ). I work hard on LD practice, dream recall, etc., and it still feels like the great dreams are too few, too far apart. FryingMan's "3 D's" of lucid dreaming: diligence, determination, dedication. It's like becoming skilled at anything: it takes thousands of hours of practice, skills build up slowly over the months and years. You have to stick through the dry spells (hard, very hard, doing steady day-long practice for 4 weeks with no lucids, and still maintaining a positive attitude?...hard!).

Lucid dreaming is perhaps the most challenging of all disciplines: it's entirely inside your head, and you're totally alone. Sure, you can get advice, but it's never direct advice, it's always running through the filter of your interpretation of what's going on. Boy oh boy, wouldn't I *love* to do a WILD dive with Sageous there inside my head with me, correcting my unproductive responses, nudging me this way and that, saying "this is *exactly* what you need to do: a, b, c, etc., "Hey, there that's the dream, now follow me and enter it like this!"

Yeah, alcohol and from what I read, weed really mess with dreaming. You must decide what you want more. I basically gave up all drinking (I was only a light social drinker to start with, but I starting saying "no" to my wife's "let's have a little night cap" suggestion on vacation, too (I've since started saying "yes" more, but always keeping the amounts low).

The first step in having great, frequent LDs is making the decision that you want it, and if you do, doing whatever it takes for as long as it takes (note: it's a lifelong journey!). Like ThreeCat quotes in his signature:



So if you're serious about wanting it, come on over to the DVA DILD class, open up a workbook thread, and fogelbise and I will do our best to guide you to help you maximize your dreaming potential.

I just decided today that I'm gonna quit, not just for lucid dreaming, but that's part of it. Just had half a glass of wine today to avoid any withdrawals (been drinking every day for quite a while).

LD's are the most amazing thing, I don't wanna waste my life not having them! Can't believe I stopped trying for so long.

I will check out that class. Thanks!