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    Thread: What do I do?

    1. #1
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      What do I do?

      Me and my husband have been married for 3 and a half years and he is the love of my life. Now there is a girl at work that he has built a friendship with and I canít stop thinking that he is falling in love with her and he will soon cheat on me with her. We have argued about this often, but our last argument was a severe one, to the point that he has said he will leave me if I donít stop accusing him of cheating, he said that I canít seem to trust him. I donít want this to ruin our relationship. Honestly, he is the best thing that happened to me, so what do I do? Please any help or advice will be greatly appreciated.

    2. #2
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      <span class='glow_8B0000'>Zhaylin</span>'s Avatar
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      So sorry for the late reply. I'm just now seeing this.
      I don't want to sound condescending, but how old are y'all?
      I ask because my first marriage was a nightmare. We married too young and I was exceptionally insecure and he was too proud. We were both too bull headed for our our own good.

      Y'all need to have an honest and open talk. Lay your heart, your insecurities, your intuition out there and hope he does the same. Don't accuse. Don't say things like "You make me feel". Simply change it around to "I feel this..."

      Don't completely rule out your gut though. Just because you're "paranoid" doesn't mean there isn't some (or a lot of) truth to what you feel.
      Some people don't understand emotional affairs. Some people don't consider petting, oral or mutual masturbation to be cheating (my husband was one of them- lol, until I asked him how he would feel if I did x, y or z with some other man ) All of this is where honest dialogue come in.

      I hope the two of you smooth things out soon.

    3. #3
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      This may sound inappropriate but if you have some extra cash stashed away you could hire a private investigator (one of my old co workers did this) again it may sound a little extreme but just a thought

    4. #4
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      Quote Originally Posted by Zhaylin View Post
      So sorry for the late reply. I'm just now seeing this.
      I don't want to sound condescending, but how old are y'all?
      I ask because my first marriage was a nightmare. We married too young and I was exceptionally insecure and he was too proud. We were both too bull headed for our our own good.

      Y'all need to have an honest and open talk. Lay your heart, your insecurities, your intuition out there and hope he does the same. Don't accuse. Don't say things like "You make me feel". Simply change it around to "I feel this..."

      Don't completely rule out your gut though. Just because you're "paranoid" doesn't mean there isn't some (or a lot of) truth to what you feel.
      Some people don't understand emotional affairs. Some people don't consider petting, oral or mutual masturbation to be cheating (my husband was one of them- lol, until I asked him how he would feel if I did x, y or z with some other man ) All of this is where honest dialogue come in.

      I hope the two of you smooth things out soon.
      We are both in our early 30's. I will talk to him this weekend and I will be honest as possible. Thanks
      Zhaylin likes this.

    5. #5
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      Quote Originally Posted by PrisonPlanet View Post
      This may sound inappropriate but if you have some extra cash stashed away you could hire a private investigator (one of my old co workers did this) again it may sound a little extreme but just a thought
      Too bad I don't have enough to hire one, but that's a nice suggestion though

    6. #6
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      We talked and we both agreed to undergo counseling, checked out a site that was referred by our friend.
      Zhaylin likes this.

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