Stop Invading My Personal Space!

I am a BIG believer in not invading another person's personal space but other people don't seem to share that sentiment.

Case in point.. BATHROOM STALLS!!

When I am in a stall.. I, maybe erroneously, consider that stall my personal space! Occasionally there are times at work that I need to take care of some "business". So WHY, in the name of all that's HOLY, when there's are 20 empty freakin' stalls would someone go into the stall RIGHT NEXT TO ME?!??!?!

Another example.. MOVIE THEATER SEATS!!

Why would you sit RIGHT in FRONT or BACK or NEXT to me when there are only 5 freakin' people in the entire theater!?!?!?!

Do some people just have "separation issues" or something???

If you are guilty of one of the above transgressions (and aren't ashamed to admit it), PUH-LEAZE explain your reasoning to me!

Does anyone else have examples of personal space being invaded?

I like to do these things just to make other people uncomfortable. Pastime of mine.

Maybe they think you are cute and want to get to know you better? Although that is a little thin when considering the bathroom stalls thing. O_O

Seeker.. sweet explanation. :content: (kinda creepy with respect to the stalls tho.)

Artelis, if that's your misson.. mission accomplished! (for shame :nono: )

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Originally Posted by Clairity

Another example.. MOVIE THEATER SEATS!!

Why would you sit RIGHT in FRONT or BACK or NEXT to me when there are only 5 freakin' people in the entire theater!?!?!?![/b]

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Yeah this really annoys me too!

I think it has a lot to do with culture though - the personal space thing. I've heard that Americans generally stand further apart when speaking to each other than other cultures, or something like that. It's all what you're used to.

Everyone who gets anywhere in life knows that everyone should have a three foot box around oneself that is not to be passed. All good kindergartner teachers will teach you that.

Mine just happens to.... overlap yours.

You may be right about the culture thing Burns. I've noticed that people of Asian decent seem to have no problem sitting right next to you in a sparcely populated theater (No.. I am not being racist.. just sharing an observation).

Now Americans.. heck you can't get two American guys who come to a movie TOGETHER to sit right next to each other.. there's always that "ONE EMPTY SEAT BETWEEN US" rule. (what's up with that?)

Yeah, unless it's my fiance, I don't want people all in my space at all times. I share a very small living space as it is, and although it isn't bad, I don't like it when I make an honest effort to get some space, and someone invades that. In a movie theatre, if it isn't crowded, I usually get up and move if some just sits down right next to me...

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Originally Posted by Clairity

Artelis, if that's your misson.. mission accomplished! (for shame :nono: )[/b]

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Ten points for me.

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Originally Posted by Clairity

I am a BIG believer in not invading another person's personal space but other people don't seem to share that sentiment.

Case in point.. BATHROOM STALLS!!

When I am in a stall.. I, maybe erroneously, consider that stall my personal space! Occasionally there are times at work that I need to take care of some "business". So WHY, in the name of all that's HOLY, when there's are 20 empty freakin' stalls would someone go into the stall RIGHT NEXT TO ME?!??!?!

Another example.. MOVIE THEATER SEATS!!

Why would you sit RIGHT in FRONT or BACK or NEXT to me when there are only 5 freakin' people in the entire theater!?!?!?!

Do some people just have "separation issues" or something???

If you are guilty of one of the above transgressions (and aren't ashamed to admit it), PUH-LEAZE explain your reasoning to me!

Does anyone else have examples of personal space being invaded?[/b]

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Yeah! The stall thing really annoys me. Your standing at the urinal, and there's 5 other empties and a guy will whip it out right next to you. It makes me want to pinch mid pee and move up some. Then the dirty bastard will try talk to me! Urrrggghh!!! Also, when I'm standing in a queue, you get those people who stand so close you could swear they're trying to climb into your pants.

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Originally Posted by Clairity

Yeah this really annoys me too!

I think it has a lot to do with culture though - the personal space thing. I've heard that Americans generally stand further apart when speaking to each other than other cultures, or something like that. It's all what you're used to.[/b]

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In South Africa, we have a lot of black people, Xhosas and Zulus and Phedis and all sorts of cultures. They apparently have no sense of personal space because they do all of the above. Generally they say it's part of their cultures not to see those boundaries

You're all fucking weirdos.

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Originally Posted by Techboy

You're all fucking weirdos.[/b]

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Are you one of those knobheads who stands next to a dude when their are empty stalls in the bathroom? FREAK!!!

I don't think this is much of an issue. I can't see why one should be bothered about someone else sitting close to oneself. I always want at least one seat between myself and another guy, though, but when it is a girl that's attractive, I take the seat next to her's.

Yeah I hate using public toilets, I usually go in the cubicals. With the cinema thing, it must be different over here because if there's an empty seat, people will sit there. I dunno maybe we're just less sociable then Americans.

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Originally Posted by King

I don't think this is much of an issue. I can't see why one should be bothered about someone else sitting close to oneself. I always want at least one seat between myself and another guy, though, but when it is a girl that's attractive, I take the seat next to her's.[/b]

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I don't really like people that much. Like, strange people want to talk to me all the time. And I'm thinking to myself, "Why are you talking to me?" obviously I don't mind if it's an attractive girl though.

I don't want strangers sitting next to me. If there's only 3 empty seats in the cinema, and one happens to be next to me then sure, sit there. If there's only 3 urinals open in a busy bathroom, then I guess I can handle a guy using the one next to me. But when the cinema or toilet is EMPTY? Like, tumbleweeds and crickets? COME ON! Dude, give me some space!

drunk people invade space a lot. I hate that! It's like they try to trap you in their space too. ever walk away from a drunk and they go "no wait... you gotta hear this..." and they raise their voice? that pisses me off.

When it comes to urinals I have to agree it is uncomfortable having people standing next to oneself, but otherwise no (unless the guy seems to be a psycho).

About the cinema: I like to have the best view of the screen... So I go sit somewhere in the back rows, somewhere in the middle of the row of chairs... So that I have the perfect view. Don't you?

Now figure that there are more people wanting that view, and thus, they go sit in the row in front or behind you...

It's common sense, no?


But, yeah... If the entire cinema is empty and someone comes sitting right beside you... Then he's crazy... The same applies to the toilet stuff...

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Originally Posted by Artelis

I like to do these things just to make other people uncomfortable. Pastime of mine.[/b]

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haha for once we have something in common, Artelis ;)

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Originally Posted by Clairity

Now Americans.. heck you can't get two American guys who come to a movie TOGETHER to sit right next to each other.. there's always that "ONE EMPTY SEAT BETWEEN US" rule. (what's up with that?)[/b]

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Unless they're gay ;)

I don't experience that kind of problems in Denmark. Also, I don't really care. If a boy sits next to me, sure. Unless the cinema is entirely empty, I wouldn't really mind. Besides, if a person sits next to you (cinema and theater, not in stalls) it can imply 3 things.

1) There weren't any other seats.

2) The person wants to be close to you, because he/her wants to be/is your friend.

3) The person doesn't give a damn about personal space.

When I'm in the cinema with my friends, and we've got an entire row of chairs for our selfs, we usually sit right next to each other. We don't each have a seat between us, that's stupid :P

And I don't care, if I'm sitting with just one friend in the cinema, for two reasons: He's my friend goddamnit and I'm a bi. So there.

my mate was going out with a girl, few years back
she took laxatives to keep thin
not nice, really (it smells)
and she tried to hide this activity from everybody

anyway, about 6 of us went on a camping trip (tents 'n all, you know)
and after dinner, she went off to the site unisex loo

so we followed her
(we being 3 of us, not including her boyfriend, obviously)
and spent about 15 mins in the loo, making ourselves obvious
running the taps
gargling
stomping up and down outside the stalls

she was desperately trying to be quiet (or just failing to hold it in, don't know which)

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Originally Posted by Techboy

You're all fucking weirdos.[/b]

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why are they all fucking weirdos?
:hump:
that just seems wrong in so many ways

I think you're all paranoid and overprotective of "personal space."

Really. I mean obviously standing next to a dude in the pisher when there are other stalls free is unnecessary but it isn't exactly life threatening aids oh no.

I've noticed in Germany that it is totally acceptable for a stranger to sit at your table in a resturant if there is room. Of course, he/she will always ask permission first.

In busses in Denmark, people often sit next to each another, if there isn't any room, but I guess that's natural :-P

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Originally Posted by dodobird

haha for once we have something in common, Artelis ;)[/b]

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Oh shi- *withdrawn*

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Another example.. MOVIE THEATER SEATS!!

Why would you sit RIGHT in FRONT or BACK or NEXT to me when there are only 5 freakin' people in the entire theater!?!?!?![/b]

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I don't know, but me wonders two things:
1) why you're going to theater by yourself?
2) what kind of movies you are going to where the audience totals about five? :wtf:

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Originally Posted by Tornado

I don't know, but me wonders two things:
1) why you're going to theater by yourself?
2) what kind of movies you are going to where the audience totals about five? :wtf:[/b]

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Going to the movies by yourself is fine. Maybe you've got two hours to kill - go to the movies.
Movies that are just about to leave the theater, on a monday, and at 2:30 pm tend to have five or less people.

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Originally Posted by Tornado

2) what kind of movies you are going to where the audience totals about five? :wtf:[/b]

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Movies that were probably critically acclaimed by the experts....

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Originally Posted by Tornado

I don't know, but me wonders two things:
1) why you're going to theater by yourself?
2) what kind of movies you are going to where the audience totals about five? :wtf:[/b]

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LOL.. OK Tornado Joe! Get your mind outta da gutter!! (you disappoint me) :bslap:

The answers to your questions:

1) Because I am a secure enough woman that if there is a movie that I want to see.. I will go see it alone!! :putemuppunk:
(Hubby's not big on romance or period movies such as Marie Antoinette, etc.)

2) The typical PG-13 to R rated movies. You'd be surprised how few people go to see the first movie playing during the week ..
especially if the movie has been out for awhile.

The only one of those transgression I have ever been guilty of is sitting in front or in back of someone in a movie theater, which I don't think is a big deal. I do it to get a good view of the screen. I always try to sit in a seat that's not right next to another person, sometimes just so they don't think I'm trying to sit next to them.

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Originally Posted by Clairity

When I am in a stall.. I, maybe erroneously, consider that stall my personal space! Occasionally there are times at work that I need to take care of some "business". So WHY, in the name of all that's HOLY, when there's are 20 empty freakin' stalls would someone go into the stall RIGHT NEXT TO ME?!??!?![/b]

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That was you? Oops...

J/k. Wait that totally backfired.

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Originally Posted by Seeker

I've noticed in Germany that it is totally acceptable for a stranger to sit at your table in a resturant if there is room. Of course, he/she will always ask permission first.[/b]

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It isnt THAT common here but its acceptable.

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Originally Posted by Squall

That was you? Oops...

J/k. Wait that totally backfired.[/b]

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Squall baby.. what were you doing in the WOMEN's bathroom?? :eh: SECURITY!!!!! :help:

:bigteeth:

Really, I'm fine. People can nudge me, poke me, play with my hair, and I don't mind. Get two inches away from my nose, and I'll speak to you as if you were three feet away instead.

Just don't screw with my ears. No, I don't want your freaky jacked-up volume i-pod speaker things jammed in my ear (they physically don't fit my ear, anyway). Go destroy your own inner (and outer) ear, thank you very much. Not even my friends have fully understood my low tolerence for loud noises. I hate concerts. I hate vacuum cleaners. I hate lawn mowers. I hate gunshots. I HATE HATE hair dryers. And I fear the popping of balloons. So please, if anything else, do not mess with my ears.

And fireworks make me twitch. I&#39;m bringing earplugs this time. ><

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Originally Posted by Abra

Really, I&#39;m fine. People can nudge me, poke me, play with my hair, and I don&#39;t mind. Get two inches away from my nose, and I&#39;ll speak to you as if you were three feet away instead.

Just don&#39;t screw with my ears. No, I don&#39;t want your freaky jacked-up volume i-pod speaker things jammed in my ear (they physically don&#39;t fit my ear, anyway). Go destroy your own inner (and outer) ear, thank you very much. Not even my friends have fully understood my low tolerence for loud noises. I hate concerts. I hate vacuum cleaners. I hate lawn mowers. I hate gunshots. I HATE HATE hair dryers. And I fear the popping of balloons. So please, if anything else, do not mess with my ears.[/b]

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Let me introduce you to Warren Jensen. He&#39;s Mary Jensen&#39;s brother. You two should get along just fine.

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Originally Posted by Ynot

my mate was going out with a girl, few years back
she took laxatives to keep thin
not nice, really (it smells)
and she tried to hide this activity from everybody

anyway, about 6 of us went on a camping trip (tents &#39;n all, you know)
and after dinner, she went off to the site unisex loo

so we followed her
(we being 3 of us, not including her boyfriend, obviously)
and spent about 15 mins in the loo, making ourselves obvious
running the taps
gargling
stomping up and down outside the stalls

she was desperately trying to be quiet (or just failing to hold it in, don&#39;t know which)[/b]

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:content: I think that would classify as invading her personal space lol. I don&#39;t know which is worse, the fact that she used laxatives to lose weight, or that her boyfriend didn&#39;t mind it.

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Originally Posted by Ynot

I think you&#39;re all paranoid and overprotective of "personal space."

Really. I mean obviously standing next to a dude in the pisher when there are other stalls free is unnecessary but it isn&#39;t exactly life threatening aids oh no.[/b]

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I probably am paranoid, but then I live in Joburg and that&#39;s scary man. I don&#39;t like people, I don&#39;t like strangers. So I&#39;m like: "I have no wish to speak to you, or hear your stories, or rub elbows while I tinkle my winkle. So if you don&#39;t move on to the next urinal, I&#39;m going to stab you in the eye with this pocket knife."

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Originally Posted by Ynot

Really, I&#39;m fine. People can nudge me, poke me, play with my hair, and I don&#39;t mind. Get two inches away from my nose, and I&#39;ll speak to you as if you were three feet away instead.[/b]

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I really can&#39;t handle that sh*t. I mean, if it&#39;s a buddy or someone I know I can maybe handle it. But if a stranger puts his face right up in my grill, I&#39;m gonna throw some punches man&#33;

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Originally Posted by Ynot

Just don&#39;t screw with my ears. No, I don&#39;t want your freaky jacked-up volume i-pod speaker things jammed in my ear (they physically don&#39;t fit my ear, anyway). Go destroy your own inner (and outer) ear, thank you very much. Not even my friends have fully understood my low tolerence for loud noises. I hate concerts. I hate vacuum cleaners. I hate lawn mowers. I hate gunshots. I HATE HATE hair dryers. And I fear the popping of balloons. So please, if anything else, do not mess with my ears.[/b]

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So you don&#39;t like planes? I like planes. I&#39;m deaf though, I have mild bilateral hearing loss. So noises don&#39;t really bug me. Coz I can&#39;t hear them&#33;

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Originally Posted by Seeker

I&#39;ve noticed in Germany that it is totally acceptable for a stranger to sit at your table in a resturant if there is room. Of course, he/she will always ask permission first.[/b]

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Really? This is great... The same is true in India, and I love it.

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Originally Posted by Clairity

I am a BIG believer in not invading another person&#39;s personal space but other people don&#39;t seem to share that sentiment.

Case in point.. BATHROOM STALLS&#33;&#33;

When I am in a stall.. I, maybe erroneously, consider that stall my personal space&#33; Occasionally there are times at work that I need to take care of some "business". So WHY, in the name of all that&#39;s HOLY, when there&#39;s are 20 empty freakin&#39; stalls would someone go into the stall RIGHT NEXT TO ME?&#33;??&#33;?&#33;

Another example.. MOVIE THEATER SEATS&#33;&#33;

Why would you sit RIGHT in FRONT or BACK or NEXT to me when there are only 5 freakin&#39; people in the entire theater&#33;?&#33;?&#33;?&#33;

Do some people just have "separation issues" or something???

If you are guilty of one of the above transgressions (and aren&#39;t ashamed to admit it), PUH-LEAZE explain your reasoning to me&#33;

Does anyone else have examples of personal space being invaded?[/b]

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For bathroom stalls and urinals and the like, I don&#39;t know why people would ever go to the one next to you, and it is just rude in my opinion, but in the case of movie theaters, I don&#39;t really give a damn if I am crowded around, I want the best possible seat, and I know exactly where that is for me about 5 seconds after entering a theater (middle of the row, mid-level in the theater, not too close/too far). I like that dead center perfect height seat; it is one of those little obsessive things that I automatically do, as it somehow psychologically improves my viewing experience.

I am the male Elliot.

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Originally Posted by Yume

I am the male Elliot.[/b]

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YUME.. where have you been my son?&#33;?

You never write.. you never call.. :morecrying: .. (A mother&#39;s road is a lonely one)

It&#39;s so good to read ya&#33;&#33;

I have no problem with people being close. I really wish people would sit at my table in America like they do in other countries. I hate that Americans are all afraid of other people. I have no problem other people sitting right next to me or peeing right next to me. Its not like I would ever do that to someone, but if someone were to do it to me the, who cares. I feel that we are all disconnected from the strangers around us. When we go to a public place we put a bubble around us with cell phones and ipods. If you try to talk to people you dont know, they look at you weird and question why you are talking to them. Come on people, The world is filled with wonderful and interesting people that we will never know unless we stop being afraid to interact and talk with strangers.

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Originally Posted by Barbizzle

I have no problem with people being close. I really wish people would sit at my table in America like they do in other countries. I hate that Americans are all afraid of other people. I have no problem other people sitting right next to me or peeing right next to me. Its not like I would ever do that to someone, but if someone were to do it to me the, who cares. I feel that we are all disconnected from the strangers around us. When we go to a public place we put a bubble around us with cell phones and ipods. If you try to talk to people you dont know, they look at you weird and question why you are talking to them. Come on people, The world is filled with wonderful and interesting people that we will never know unless we stop being afraid to interact and talk with strangers.[/b]

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Mr Sensible over here

hmm...i&#39;ve never really thought about it till you mentioned it clairity...I don&#39;t think it bothers me, cos usually if i have to go to the bathroom in public, i&#39;m intent on going to the loo&#33;&#33;&#33; It can be a bit unnerving hearing the person in the cubicle next to you doing one or the other though, if you know what i mean.

I wouldn&#39;t be bothered if someone sat next to me at the pictures as long as they asked first, same goes for restaurant tables.

however, i might be bothered if someone did that when i was with my boyfriend, cos i think that&#39;s just plain rude...
I&#39;ve noticed on trains and buses though, people avoid sitting next to other people if there&#39;s a free seat...

I tend to do it cos i usually have a cartload of stuff and need somewhere to put it...