Thread: OMG Let's rap battle!

Dear Oneironaut,

The last pooosssy I saw was you in a photo
The one before that was on your ho I call Toto
I was playing about not recalling that she swallows
She's reminding me right now
She'll remind me twice tomorrow
The closet you brought up, and your subconscious caused it
You were sleeping but it heard me and Toto in your closet
You call yourself a moderator
when you're really just a superpimp hater
Don't cry on the way back to your trailer
knowing you've been schooled
and you'll get more schooling later

Oneironaut...dude you're the K-I-N-G of this thread.

Mark75: That was actually impressive lol.

UM: not bad

Sup y’all… Just a friends of O’s and he told me bout this so I wanted to check it out…

Aaaaand don't get offended, its all in good fun... I'll see y'all around DV


Okay, here he comes, its the Mr. Mysterious,
First post on DV, bout leave all y’all delirious,
Omnius Deus, I ‘preciate you startin the direction of this thread,
But now err’body check your Golden Compass… Deus is dead,
And Xox, this girl stealin lyrics then tryin’ to come hard,
Then try to call herself the judge, that girl should be disbarred,
Oneironaut, we’ll battle later, so I’ll save you for last,
Right after I get done with Universal Mind’s ass,
Riotmaker, he came out like “Let’s give it a shot”,
Then he pulled an Xox and his ass got caught,
Ynot, let’s be honest, you answered your own question,
Oneironaut, you’re a mod, please terminate his session,
Mark75, seriously, are you a dude or a chick?,
Don’t matter either I’m sure you good with a dick,
GestaltAlteration, sittin back in quiet observation,
Or maybe just caught up in a little masturbation,
Kushna Mufeed, the answer to your question is the sword,
You got no skills with a pen OR on the keyboard,
Shark Rider surfed in with a round of applause,
But ain’t talked since, prolly on Ironaut’s balls,
Universal Mind dropped in callin’ everybody bitches,
And soundin’ bout as intelligent as Cam’ron on 60 minutes,
And you know I had to get at you with more than 2 lines,
Especially the way you talk like you got 2 minds,
I agree, the world’s a pretty messed up place,
So please, don’t add your lyrics to this land of waste,
TomofForks logged in just to show some love,
Then I looked at his gender and I’m like, what the f***?
I guess that puts you in category with Mark75,
Jeff777, dropped in with the video from T.I.,
Showin much love to O, callin him the king,
And I bet you can guess who wants to be his queen,
Now Mr. Ironaut, where should I begin?,
Where UM left off or should I just jump in,
Well considering I’m the head of the aforementioned school,
My first order of business, is firing Mr. Universal,
I ain’t read any other threads so ain’t a lot of material buildin,
But when I’m done here, DV’s getting a serial killin,
And I don’t wanna say too much got save some lines for later,
Ain’t that I don’t have lines, just that you the moderator,
So for now I’ll just let you chop me down like a rainforest,
By your big words courtesy of Roget’s Thesauras

Magikjimbo, since Senseless Banter posts don't count toward post count, your count says you have zero posts.

Damn.... <hangs head in shame>

He thinks he's pimp, he thinks he's hard
The one who's gimped, that cursed retard
Hes coming slow, with DV stars
Not checking spam, it's not that hard.

Here it comes, my fear's earthquaking
I feel the tremble, I smell the bacon
Comes unearthly, banhammer raking
It's Oneironaut, the god's forsaken.

Originally Posted by Xox

I stole them

As expected.

Originally Posted by Universal Mind

Dear Oneironaut,

The last pooosssy I saw was you in a photo
The one before that was on your ho I call Toto
I was playing about not recalling that she swallows
She's reminding me right now
She'll remind me twice tomorrow
The closet you brought up, and your subconscious caused it
You were sleeping but it heard me and Toto in your closet
You call yourself a moderator
when you're really just a superpimp hater
Don't cry on the way back to your trailer
knowing you've been schooled
and you'll get more schooling later

You call the ho you fuck Toto? Ha! In actuality
I'm not surprised your pet name for her relates to beastiality.
Your mentality's twisted. I knew this all along,
but it takes a wack-job to name his mistress after A Dog!
But hey, whatever floats your boat. If that's the shit that you're into
I've got a lonely German Shepard you're welcome to attend to.
Despite your alias, we know your cluelessness is limitless.
Universal Mind? You should be renamed Local Ingnorance!
You're no hindrance to my reign when it comes to this battle
Tried to dump on me but found yourself up Shit's Creek with no paddle.
So fight the current while I prepare to X you off of my checklist.
I'm done with you at just Round Two. Round Three will be your pearl necklace.

But wait.

What's this I see? Another's come to get battered?
Welcome to Dream Views Jim. Now View your Dreams as they're shattered,
by none other than myself. What? D'you expect someone else?
Come in here like you're bullet-proof, you'll leave with gashes and welts.
My rhymes are tight like knots in laces, boy, you'll never undo me.
Shit, you serious? Like I'll get ripped by some DV N00bie!
You've still got a lot to learn. Step back or things'll get tragic.
Shit, even Houdini died while trying to prove he was Majik!
But I won't go all out on you till you've peeped the schematics.
Grab a pen, or tape recorder, and keep up with my tactics.
If you want to bring it, bring it. But this ain't no rehersal.
It's the real deal, so don't get killed, just like your boy Univseral.

This thread should be in favorites...this is rich.

Originally Posted by Xox

I'm sorry. Okay I'll do my own and you can probably tell it's me this time.

I'm the best
Forget the rest
You all are no competion
Get better ammunition
I was born a winner
Imma tell you the difference
Years and years of existence.
This has been fun
But I won
So I'm out, One

Yes, but this was my own! ^

Okay - this is my own as well. (You can probably tell)

Bring it on bit*hes.

Mic check 1 2 1 2
This is part 2 of 2
Yeah
I have returned, this time original.
Let's make this one educational.
Short and sweet - I'll deliver the message
O, All I'm seeing is mediocre to average
UM go home and practice bars a few times more
Deus - so weak - I don't even have an answer for
But I'm respecting the Art of War
The talent is pure
I'm landing you all on the floor
Before I lose my mind
I suggest none of you losers cross the line
Let's make this clear - I hope you understand
Next time don't ever speak to me without rasiing your hand

Hell yeah, you know you saw this coming
The rise of the master that I am becoming
I've created clones, I've beaten Triton,
I've moved the moon, yeah you better be frighten

Don't know much about rap, I rather despise it
But writing is something that I can do for s**t
So I'm posting in this here rap thread
This is a day you will always dread

The day some white kid beat you at street
At your feet, too much heat, I'm the rapper elite
I can't continue my verbal ass-kickin'
Cause it's dinner, time for me to eat some chicken!

While you're eatin your chicken,
This thread I'll be rippin'
And all the girls'll be flippin'
To be suckin' my dick 'n'
You know you be jealous,
cuz you so over over zealous
you're tryin' to get
people to rebel us
but it won't work,
cuz those mans is my fellas
I will take you on
in fist fights or checkers
When you come on the track
You be wreckin the record
When I flow on the beat
I be breakin some records
Man, you think you tough
like I'll shake in my shoes
But I'll destroy you lyrically
Even when I'm on booze.

Damn that was some mighty fine chicken
It was great, awesome, just finger-lickin'
KM, boy, you got some nerve
To stand up to the servings that I serve

You think you're better, you're more hot ****
But you didn't see the fire you just lit
That fire, it's me, I'm smokin' hot
And you not, you full of snot, IS THAT ALL YOU GOT?

Go ahead, take a shot, you'll never suceed
Can't destroy my pride, KUSHNA MUFEED!

Ha!

Originally Posted by Oneironaut

You call the ho you fuck Toto? Ha! In actuality
I'm not surprised your pet name for her relates to beastiality.
Your mentality's twisted. I knew this all along,
but it takes a wack-job to name his mistress after A Dog!
But hey, whatever floats your boat. If that's the shit that you're into
I've got a lonely German Shepard you're welcome to attend to.
Despite your alias, we know your cluelessness is limitless.
Universal Mind? You should be renamed Local Ingnorance!
You're no hindrance to my reign when it comes to this battle
Tried to dump on me but found yourself up Shit's Creek with no paddle.
So fight the current while I prepare to X you off of my checklist.
I'm done with you at just Round Two. Round Three will be your pearl necklace.

The reason that I once came up with the name
Toto for your superslutty ho that I bang
is that the grand master mac daddy pimp that I am
has so many hoes that the bottom hoochies stand
out as something so much less than the top notch
goddesses in my mass supply of biotch
Too bad your fat mama couldn't meet my need
except decades ago when I planted the seed
of the punk ass special ed bitch called Oneironaut
who loves to fuck real dogs but just hasn't been caught

Originally Posted by Xox

Bring it on bit*hes.

Mic check 1 2 1 2
This is part 2 of 2
Yeah
I have returned, this time original.
Let's make this one educational.
Short and sweet - I'll deliver the message
O, All I'm seeing is mediocre to average
UM go home and practice bars a few times more
Deus - so weak - I don't even have an answer for
But I'm respecting the Art of War
The talent is pure
I'm landing you all on the floor
Before I lose my mind
I suggest none of you losers cross the line
Let's make this clear - I hope you understand
Next time don't ever speak to me without rasiing your hand

Woes, what was that? Did I just hear my name?
I thought I heard it in some stupid shit babble that was lame
My hand will only raise to you to give you the finger
and point as I laugh while you struggle through the ringer
Bring it on again if you think you're a bad ho
but your thought is just a mental masturbation gone loco

Originally Posted by suttsman

Hell yeah, you know you saw this coming
The rise of the master that I am becoming
I've created clones, I've beaten Triton,
I've moved the moon, yeah you better be frighten

Don't know much about rap, I rather despise it
But writing is something that I can do for s**t
So I'm posting in this here rap thread
This is a day you will always dread

The day some white kid beat you at street
At your feet, too much heat, I'm the rapper elite
I can't continue my verbal ass-kickin'
Cause it's dinner, time for me to eat some chicken!

Originally Posted by Universal Mind

The reason that I once came up with the name
Toto for your superslutty ho that I bang
is that the grand master mac daddy pimp that I am
has so many hoes that the bottom hoochies stand
out as something so much less than the top notch
goddesses in my mass supply of biotch
Too bad your fat mama couldn't meet my need
except decades ago when I planted the seed
of the punk ass special ed bitch called Oneironaut
who loves to fuck real dogs but just hasn't been caught

Third and final round. Shit is final now, Gather round,
and witness the demise of ol' Universal Da Clown.
Talking bout he's got squads of females, like he fucks entire teams,
Guess it's appropriate, seeing as how this is a website 'bout our dreams.
Oh, just so you know, UM, I don't mean to imply you're slow,
But I used the "yo' momma" angle 'bout, oh, say, a round ago.
It's all good, though, you were just panicking, dude.
If I was looking wack as you, I'd have tried anything, too!
And did you say "daddy mac?" Look, Gramps is bringing back past words!
Figures you'd quote from Kriss-Kross, like them, your style is ass-backwards!
You should have heeded the parental advisory, slut,
Now look. You're cold and the undertaker's sizing you up.
Will see, in time, if you'll want more or will just bury the hatchet.
So long, UM. Somebody help me carry this casket.

Originally Posted by Oneironaut

Third and final round. Shit is final now, Gather round,
and witness the demise of ol' Universal Da Clown.
Talking bout he's got squads of females, like he fucks entire teams,
Guess it's appropriate, seeing as how this is a website 'bout our dreams.
Oh, just so you know, UM, I don't mean to imply you're slow,
But I used the "yo' momma" angle 'bout, oh, say, a round ago.
It's all good, though, you were just panicking, dude.
If I was looking wack as you, I'd have tried anything, too!
And did you say "daddy mac?" Look, Gramps is bringing back past words!
Figures you'd quote from Kriss-Kross, like them, your style is ass-backwards!
You should have heeded the parental advisory, slut,
Now look. You're cold and the undertaker's sizing you up.
Will see, in time, if you'll want more or will just bury the hatchet.
So long, UM. Somebody help me carry this casket.

Oh, okay, running away you say?
That's what I thought when I first set out and fought
Oneironaut my crybaby son I taught
not to cower out in the midst of his onslaughts
of crying while struggling to spit out his store bought
lameness, so much the same as
a chihuahua barking bolting from a bad great dane's ass
Kriss Kross's Mac Daddy/Daddy Mac was the name
of one of your heroes that's the source of your game?
The term mac daddy was big before your idols,
and it looks like their method is your rap game Bible
Now that I know where your fanship lies
I can laugh some more at how your nursery rhymes died

Alright, well I'll just freestyle and let someone challenge me. No beef, no beef (none of my words are meant to be serious).
.....



Now now now, look at these flashy rhymes,
Every line the equivalent of a whine,
Mark and Oneiro, please can ya get a room?
Both ya'll look like clowns dressed in full costume
with big red noses, a wig and some makeup,
Fighting like two bitches after a breakup,
Now wake up, can't you see O is the champ,
Just put Universal in his respective internment camp.
How does it feel to be caged by some words,
I'm sure the Jewish wouldn't think it's absurd.
Now fly back to your dignity like a little bird,
Challenge me now 'n' there won't be a third,
Ya you heard, but I prefer to chew nerds,
Who can't spit anything but an ABAB verse,
Now do your worst, you're about to get cursed,
I await your decision, now quench my thirst.

You're talking of rhyme schemes?
You're living in pipe dreams.
Fool, I'm the ace,
and you all are my queens.
So step up, put up and prepare.
I'll wipe the smirk off your face;
replace with a blank stare.
"No fair!" you declare as you spew hot air.
You think I care? Propel into despair!
Too bad! Oh well!
You want to go somewhere?
I'm gonna send you to hell!
Don't represent and present
yourself as something cheap;
Lesser product.
Your cred's clothes deep.

Oneironaut; You sound so similar to Immortal Technique it's astonishing. That is a complement obviously.

I lol'd at this so hard: "To stand up to the servings that I serve". It was single-handedly the most un-flowing line within the entire thread.

Me brotha beatin you bitch.
F***in yo whole with my sawdoff.

This thread is fricking good
So many people savor it
Tell me if you could
Why ain't this DV Favorites?

(not the best I've done, thought of it in like 30 seconds, but seriously, why?)

What happen Oneironaut? Why is this taking so long?
Does it really take that long to answer to my song?
Perhaps you've run out of gimmicks.
Perhaps you've forgotten those lyrics
C'mon man, you're losing the spirit