• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




    View Poll Results: is it ok?

    Voters
    19. You may not vote on this poll
    • sure

      11 57.89%
    • of course not. ever.

      6 31.58%
    • onlyif they are not around

      2 10.53%
    Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast
    Results 1 to 25 of 26

    Thread: is it ok?

    1. #1
      bleak... nerve's Avatar
      Join Date
      Sep 2003
      LD Count
      a lot
      Gender
      Location
      inside you
      Posts
      5,229
      Likes
      100

      is it ok?

      do you think it is alright, if you have a girlfriend/boyfriend, to look at other women/men?

      discuss.


      Ignorant bliss is an oxymoron; but so is miserable truth.

    2. #2
      CT
      CT is offline
      Member CT's Avatar
      Join Date
      Jan 2004
      Posts
      3,235
      Likes
      4
      Nope.

    3. #3
      Member
      Join Date
      Feb 2004
      Posts
      5,165
      Likes
      709
      I think it depends on what you mean by "look". If you just happen to glance over at another girl nothing wrong with that. If you sit there staring at her though, thats another matter.

      Either way though its rude to do it infront of the person your with.

    4. #4
      bleak... nerve's Avatar
      Join Date
      Sep 2003
      LD Count
      a lot
      Gender
      Location
      inside you
      Posts
      5,229
      Likes
      100
      I'm freaking talkign about looking over at a girl and seeing her in a freaking spaghetti strap shirt and going "Mmmmm" OKAY.


      that kind of "look".


      Ignorant bliss is an oxymoron; but so is miserable truth.

    5. #5
      Ev
      Ev is offline
      Member Ev's Avatar
      Join Date
      Dec 2003
      Location
      Earth
      Posts
      2,381
      Likes
      142
      That kind of look is not ok But I voted already

    6. #6
      Member nightowl's Avatar
      Join Date
      Jul 2003
      Gender
      Location
      New York/Massachusetts. College can do funny things like that
      Posts
      2,856
      Likes
      1
      A glance is okay. you know look briefly and then go back to whatever he was doing.

      I'm freaking talkign about looking over at a girl and seeing her in a freaking spaghetti strap shirt and going \"Mmmmm\" OKAY.
      [/b]
      that's not okay. actually that's kinda disrespectful.

      Curiosity killed the cat but at least it didnt die an ignorant bastard

    7. #7
      moderator emeritus jacobo's Avatar
      Join Date
      Dec 2003
      Gender
      Location
      little mexico
      Posts
      2,683
      Likes
      2
      it's up to circumstances. -- for instance... i was at a restaurant with my girlfriend last week... we're sitting there and this guy over my right shoulder keeps looking at her... she says it's kind of creepy because the dude is with his wife and kids! you see... that's not ok. the dude is married...

      i can certainly see glancing at a butt but i'd never gawk over one... let alone go after one while i'm in a relationship... i'm sure my girlfriend does the same... it's human nature.
      clear eyes. strong hands.

    8. #8
      Member Kaniaz's Avatar
      Join Date
      Jan 2004
      Gender
      Location
      England
      Posts
      5,441
      Likes
      9
      I think that even if you're married the impulse to look at sexy butt or whatever doesn't go away so why the hell not.

    9. #9
      moderator emeritus jacobo's Avatar
      Join Date
      Dec 2003
      Gender
      Location
      little mexico
      Posts
      2,683
      Likes
      2
      i never said the impulse went away when you got married... it's just something that needs to be suppressed.

      now i'm not advocating suppressing sexual desires... or primal urges when they're most important... but dude... you're married! it's time to settle down. the act of suppressing those urges when you're young can damage you for life... but this dude was well into his 40's and he's gawking over a 24 year old while his kids eat their bread sticks... there's a line.
      clear eyes. strong hands.

    10. #10
      Member Kaniaz's Avatar
      Join Date
      Jan 2004
      Gender
      Location
      England
      Posts
      5,441
      Likes
      9
      that's a different scenario. o_o;

    11. #11
      Member Umbrasquall's Avatar
      Join Date
      Oct 2003
      Gender
      Location
      NYC
      Posts
      3,444
      Likes
      3
      As long as it's just looking. Unless you're married, then I'd say no to looking. (But only in the scenario like adidas describes.)

    12. #12
      CT
      CT is offline
      Member CT's Avatar
      Join Date
      Jan 2004
      Posts
      3,235
      Likes
      4
      ok when you see a pretty girl i know you just cant help thinking pretty girl ... but you leave it at that... just a glance... Anything else is off limits.

    13. #13
      Member Achievements:
      1 year registered Veteran First Class 5000 Hall Points
      loose id's Avatar
      Join Date
      Jul 2004
      LD Count
      62
      Gender
      Location
      Elsewhere
      Posts
      213
      Likes
      0
      I go with the following words of advice in this scenario:

      Just because you're chained to the porch, doesn't mean you can't bark at the mailman.

      If a girl I was dating were to look over at another guy and admire him, I'd be a little jealous, but that doesn't make it wrong for her to do that. Now, if she were to go over and sit on his face, that's the third strike.
      An idea is something you haven't fully considered.
      A belief is merely a repetitive thought.
      A conclusion is simply where you stopped thinking.

    14. #14
      Member Amethyst Star's Avatar
      Join Date
      Jul 2004
      Gender
      Location
      Atashermi
      Posts
      6,856
      Likes
      63
      If you're in a relationship, I feel that it is important to be dedicated to the person you're with. Now, if you see someone else come along, don't go after them. I would spend more time with the person I'm already with and if I felt that I could live without being eternally close to them (maybe that's pushing it) and still had feelings for this other person, I'd let the person I'm with down slowly, but still remain close friends with them.

      It's not right to go after a first impulse unless you're single. If you're looking for a normal friend, take your girlfriend/boyfriend, etc. with you and have both of you meet them. Those are just my two bits.

      -Amé

      "If there was one thing the lucid dreaming ninja writer could not stand, it was used car salesmen."

    15. #15
      Member
      Join Date
      Feb 2004
      Posts
      5,165
      Likes
      709
      If the person your with notice your looking, your looking to much.

    16. #16
      Member
      Join Date
      Jan 2004
      Location
      The Matrix... Wishes to: Free DV ....... Bears the truth: What do you think?
      Posts
      3,339
      Likes
      0
      Paperdoll already knows my stand on this, but I think that if you are with someone, it is only common decency to not look at other girls that way while your parter is with you. Just put yourself in her/his shoes and think whether or not you would mind if your partner did the same thing.
      If I hadn't made me
      I'd be more inclined to bow
      Powers that be would have swallowed me up
      But that's more than I can allow...

    17. #17
      Member gameover's Avatar
      Join Date
      Jun 2004
      Gender
      Location
      Chicago
      Posts
      1,642
      Likes
      10
      if you are with someone, it is only common decency to not look at other girls that way while your parter is with you[/b]
      You guys are strange. We're talking about looking, not getting phone numbers. It;s one of the most basic natural things in the world to look at the opposite sex in admiration. I love my girlfriend more than life, and I think an open relationship is much healthier one, for both of us. To avoid looking when my instincts say look....well thats just wierd. For her too. I know she find other guys attractive and I wouldn't dare stress her about it. We'll talk about what we find attractive, to each other. Be open about it. Jealousy is so pointless. One should never be so insecure about a relationship like that. I know that my girl and I are perfect for each other, on so many levels, physical attraction being just one of them. Ill give anyone a look, but I wont give them the love I give her.
      I'm in Chasing Mars, one of Chicago's best [link removed - ask for permision]indie rock bands[/url]! <------CLICK FOR FREE MUSIC

    18. #18
      Member
      Join Date
      Jan 2004
      Location
      The Matrix... Wishes to: Free DV ....... Bears the truth: What do you think?
      Posts
      3,339
      Likes
      0
      I understand what you are trying to say, but unless you have some sort of implicit agreement, I just think it is disrespectful to do so in front of your mate. It's not about jealousy, I just think it's not a pleasant thing for her to watch. But that's just me...
      If I hadn't made me
      I'd be more inclined to bow
      Powers that be would have swallowed me up
      But that's more than I can allow...

    19. #19
      bleak... nerve's Avatar
      Join Date
      Sep 2003
      LD Count
      a lot
      Gender
      Location
      inside you
      Posts
      5,229
      Likes
      100
      Originally posted by Truthbearer
      It's not about jealousy, I just think it's not a pleasant thing for her to watch.
      ...


      Ignorant bliss is an oxymoron; but so is miserable truth.

    20. #20
      Member gameover's Avatar
      Join Date
      Jun 2004
      Gender
      Location
      Chicago
      Posts
      1,642
      Likes
      10
      It's not about jealousy, I just think it's not a pleasant thing for her to watch.[/b]
      For who to watch? Not every girls the same.
      I'm in Chasing Mars, one of Chicago's best [link removed - ask for permision]indie rock bands[/url]! <------CLICK FOR FREE MUSIC

    21. #21
      moderator emeritus jacobo's Avatar
      Join Date
      Dec 2003
      Gender
      Location
      little mexico
      Posts
      2,683
      Likes
      2
      [quote]it's up to circumstances.

      clear eyes. strong hands.

    22. #22
      Rotaredom Howie's Avatar
      Join Date
      Dec 2003
      Gender
      Location
      Undisclosed location
      Posts
      10,272
      Likes
      24
      There is a time and place for everything. I think it is a lack of respect to look at other women or men when you are with your partner. It is obvious that just because you are "with" someone that you will still find other people attractive. So on occasion to look at somone you find attractive while you are not with your significant other seems to me to be OK. Maybe I sound contradictive.

    23. #23
      Member Achievements:
      1 year registered Veteran First Class Made lots of Friends on DV 1000 Hall Points Stickie King Vivid Dream Journal Populated Wall 50000 Hall Points
      OpheliaBlue's Avatar
      Join Date
      Jun 2004
      Location
      Aisle NEIN
      Posts
      13,310
      Likes
      13726
      DJ Entries
      224
      I think it's ok if you don't make it SOOOOOOOO obvious to your lover. I wouldn't like it if a boyfriend was like "Ohhhhhhhhh, DAMN she's hot!! GOD I want to do her, WOOHOOOO!!!!!!" in front of me. However, if my boyfriend was like, "I think she's hot, what do you think?" Then I could honestly answer him "yes" or "no", because it was an honest question. So long as he wasn't TRYING to make me jealous, ya know? I think there's a difference between a guy just "looking" and a guy trying really desperately to make me jealous or test me as it were. I'll just ignore him if that's the case.

      If you're in an insecure relationship, then you better not say/do a DAMN thing!! I look all the time, but I don't do it in a way that hurts my guy.

      God I hope that made sense, I had a bit of wine tonight .

    24. #24
      Seamstress of Song Achievements:
      Referrer Bronze 1000 Hall Points Made lots of Friends on DV Veteran First Class
      Vira's Avatar
      Join Date
      Dec 2008
      Gender
      Location
      Texas
      Posts
      271
      Likes
      13
      Depends, really...How much confidence do you have in yourself or your lover/spouse/significant other? Just comes down to trust. So, either way, it depends really...
      “If only I was equipped with the capacity to
      utilize my brain for witty quips.”



    25. #25
      Gentlemen. Ladies. slayer's Avatar
      Join Date
      Mar 2007
      Gender
      Location
      Right here... Reputation: 9999
      Posts
      4,900
      Likes
      469
      DJ Entries
      4
      Vira why are you bumping these threads?

    Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast

    Bookmarks

    Posting Permissions

    • You may not post new threads
    • You may not post replies
    • You may not post attachments
    • You may not edit your posts
    •