Stepping Up a Level

Well, the day has come. I can't believe I could ever have gotten this far. I always perceived this to be impossible.

I've always had a fair ammount of lucid dreams, with control and quite high vividness... but this just knocks them all down into nothing.

Last night I had a step by step exploration through every landmark in my life up to now; both good and bad. I even saw memories from when I was a toddler, whether they are real or not I could not say.

But in any case, I am now able to visit reflections of my life in my dreams. I can change them and see what might have been the resolution had I done something different.

I've never felt this powerful, aware and full of confidence. Landscapes rearrange themselves at the click of my fingers. It's not like it's full control or anything all that extraordinary, but for me this is such a leap into a new ability.

I want to thank everyone here who has helped me get to this point. I am so proud of myself right now, and I owe it a lot to all of the advice you have given me.

Wow Kitten, that's great! :goodjob2:

I must say I envy you - I'm still after such an insightful lucid experience myself. It's still good to hear that it's possible. I'm curious, how long did this dream seem to last? You say you went back to (possible) childhood memories. Did you go through all these periods in sequence or did they skip around?

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I even saw memories from when I was a toddler, whether they are real or not I could not say[/b]

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Wonder if it really matters whether they're real or not. What was nothing before is a memory now. It's as if you've just added a piece of life to your existance. Creating memories - real or not - still seems like part of your past now. You must feel some sort of fullfilment in that.

The dream seemed to last all night, as it's the only dream I remember. It started by me meditating and listening to a self hypnosis tape that helps you deal with the pain of past experience and then I listened to a tape that helps you drift into a deep sleep. After visualising all of the experiences in my life and with the soothing tape guiding me into sleep, the two fused and I went into a long sleep paralysis. I then had a false awakening but soon noticed that I was in my old house and I was a baby.

One by one, starting from when I was young. In a chronical sequence all of the true mind altering experiences were relived. From being beaten up and attacking back, from taking drugs for the first time, from meeting my boyfriend.. everything. It seemed like time had slowed down and my brain was telling me I HAD to cope with it all.

And by altering these things and doing what I had rather done in those situations, I felt much better. I woke up so refreshed and relaxed... comfy and warm.