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      (continued...) I actually restrict myself to galantamine once per week to minimize the risk of ACh receptor desensitization (and to make sure I can still get lucid without it.) I'm overly paranoid about screwing myself over, so I even throw in piracetam afterward. I'm already cautious and exacting by nature and now my unpleasant tussle with "mango mouth" has made me even worse. But I've decided once I've had 100 lucid dreams, I'll be sufficiently experienced to look at doing more with G.
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      Heh heh, exactly right on the subjective experiences. I've been relying on the (probably inadequate) combination of Erowid trip reports and my own imagination. No doubt it's just the wishful thinker in me, but I also believe that a lot of these experiences really may be accessible to the very advanced lucid dreamer. (That ain't me... yet. )

      Yeah, I was also thinking that peppermint tea would be the way to go! I mean, how many (expensive-ish) cough drops can a man chew before bedtime? I also lack the balls and milligram-level scale necessary to fool around directly with menthol crystals, but peppermint tea sounds nice and non-threatening. But dutch said something about how tea from bags wouldn't be worth doing, and I realized I needed to get a clue as to why before continuing further.
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      Woop thank you
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      Slow and steady, but very well! I have not forgotten about your white void neurochemistry walkthrough and, happily, my mind is able to wrap itself around more and more of it. One thing that never seems to quite come through in the research is the subjective experience of these different neurochemical moments. Did you have to look into research about psychedelics specifically to learn that? I'll just keep telling myself that you weren't born knowing all of this stuff.

      On the self-experimentation front, galantamine seems to still be delivering nicely, although I'm finding that L-theanine is a nice help for warding off insomnia. I haven't gotten around to trying the zinc yet! And now thanks to Xanous -> your menthol thread, I'm cough drop-curious as well. It's exciting, and I'm glad that I have (barely) enough self-control to not carpet-bomb myself with all of this different stuff too close together. I'm staying disciplined for science.
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      Happy birthday, Alyzarin!
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      Happy Birthday Alyzarin.
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      Happy birthday... Found out just now that you aren't like 19, as I previously though!
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      happy birthday have a great day.
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      Happy birthdaaay <:
    10. View Conversation
      Thanks! Yeah, I agree completely on the importance of considering all sources of zinc. I'm also not shy about meat and dairy, so that coupled w/ the zinc from my multi would make me tilt toward a pretty conservative dose if I ever tried it myself. For now I'm watching from the sidelines, but with great interest.

      What's especially exciting to me is that you're talking about a specific mechanism that can explain why zinc has the effect that it does. Cool stuff.
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    Recent Entries

    ~Summer Dreams~

    by Alyzarin on 06-07-2013 at 04:32 AM
    These are all of the lucids I've had since I went on vacation. It's good but I really need to get back on track with journaling, all of these have been high vividness but vanish so easily when I wake up. My ability to enjoy a lucid is high, but my recall is terrible. I definitely need to fix this....

    But in the meantime, dreams! It's been a while since I had some of these, so my apologies if my memory is a little shaky on them.

    May 21

    Right before my eyes!! [DILD]

    The first thing I remember is hanging around my neighborhood. I was hanging out with a couple old friends, I believe a couple who I went to elementary school with, and we were staring at where the elementary school used to be and reminiscing. It had been replaced with a college campus, though in reality it still stands there. I became lucid when I separated from them, and I headed down the alleyway that leads to my house. The main thing I recall about the beginning of this lucid was that there were a bunch of DCs chasing me like screaming fangirls. They were all cute, somewhat chubby white girls. I was fighting one of them off near my garage and I decided that I needed some kind of weapon. I held out my hand as if I was holding something and just stared at it and visualized a wrench being there, and it faded into existence right before me! It wasn't really that useful to me though, I'm not exactly sure why I went with a wrench, so I just tossed it at her and ran back out into the open. On my way out I also tried to split my body in two and summon fire but I wasn't able to do either. I was also able to reach up to my face and remove a pair of glasses, twice without putting any back on, that increased the vividness of the scene each time.

    When I got out of the alleyway I was still being chased by the girl, she tried to jump me and I ended up accidentally groping her, but then I got away and she seemed to disappear. I turned down one of my neighborhood streets and saw this girl who looked like ML, that I knew all throughout public school also since elementary, but she looked almost like a porn star. Also, I have no earthly idea what this means, but in my phone notes at the end of that last part I added "and apparently it was an ongoing procedural thing." I believe I picked her up as I walked by her and started inviting her to my house, but then the dream faded away.

    May 22

    Good thing we're not.... [DILD]

    I don't remember too much about this one. TB, a guy from elementary school, and some other guy were there, and at one point I was walking with this girl MH who people used to think we were related back in like first or second grade. I was thinking about making out with her, but then I realized that this all was odd and became lucid, but then I woke up.

    May 24

    Hammerspace trial. [DILD]

    I was back in high school talking to M's friend C at the end of a class and the beginning of break, then I left to find someone else though I forget who now. All I know is that I was done with classes at that point. I became lucid while walking into a classroom and took off my backpack and randomly decided to just drop it through the floor so I could store it for later. When it actually worked and the floor swallowed it up, I got kind of distracted and decided to toy around with it a little more. I stuck my hand into the floor and tried reaching around for the bag but couldn't find it anywhere, so I pulled myself back out and tried to summon it directly into my hand like the wrench from before but I couldn't get that to work either, and since I focused so much on it the rest of the dream faded away.

    June 4

    #1 - Acid carnival? [DILD]

    I was lucid outside at night at some kind of bizarre carnival. This whole section of the dream had a very strange psychotic feel to it. I was bursting with energy and the random chains of events happening around me were unfolding in a way that made me feel like I was in an acid trip. Everywhere I looked I had to fight off a good deal of sexual temptation to avoid getting too swept up into the dream and losing track of the lucid. The main ones I remember now are the barber shop girls and the girls getting their hair cut there, and then some beautiful performing girls including LK from middle and high school who wer just singing and dancing. There were also some weird guys here and there, and I specifically remembering sticking out my hand at one of them and yelling "Bang!" Other than that it's really hard to remember what all happened in this dream, it was very frantic and there was a lot going on.

    #2 - Maybe I'll just wait.... [DILD]

    This is an interesting dream to me because I'm pretty sure I accidentally incubated it while falling asleep due to what I was considering doing. I'm fairly certain the dream just kicked in with me lucid while walking down a hallway with the intention of masturbating. I seem to be in some kind of school or something and I come upon the bathroom so I head inside and notice that it's massive and there's a huge line of girls waiting inside, and even a few guys. I just decided to fuck the system and walk past the line all the way down to the end. I look in the stall and I try to throw this one girl out but she won't budge. She says something about seeing a "nasty phallus" or something like that, and then immediately holds up this suitcase with three fake but realistic and damaged-looking penises just sitting in it to show me. They looked like they were diseased and rotting or something, and it really grossed me out and I woke up.

    June 6

    Sort of like being drunk in an out-of-body experience. How can you beat that? [DILD]

    The first of this lucid is hard for me to recall now which is annoying because I know it was cool, but mainly what I remember is starting out in some high up apartment building out in the hills somewhere and flying out and above a city scape for a while. I also saw this old abandoned building on the ground I was approaching at one point so I did a twirl in the air with the expectation that it would be inhabited when I turned all the way around and saw it again, and it was successful. When I got there I just flew around a bit and through walls to see what all there was to do, and I came upon this very attractive girl, just a little bit younger than me by the looks of it. I picked her up and just carried her in my arms with me for a little bit and got distracted talking to another DC or something. I can't remember what was said now, mainly because of what happened next. I focused back on her again and looked down at her body and noticed that she was completely naked. That combined with the fact that I was only somewhat lucid and already pretty horny, and my prefrontal cortex must have taken a big hit. I don't remember much about the next part other than basically becoming an animal. Seriously, I could get addicted to this. >.>

    The bummer though was one part when I looked up from my partner and noticed that we were being swallowed into some sort of pit of darkness that was taking the stability of the dream along with it. At the last second I realized that I hadn't been able to keep focus, but there was no time to try to save it before my awareness vanished.
    The dream became a third-person, non-lucid scene of a woman who was escaping some thugs or something by jumping out of a window of the apartment building from before and realizing she could fly too, and I saw us flying next to each other while I told her that we were in an astral projection together. Then, I suddenly had a false awakening in that same building. I got up and noticed that my parents were talking right outside my room, and figured that that was probably what woke me up. But after that I actually did wake up.
    lucid , memorable

    Flying Over a Montain Range

    by Alyzarin on 05-17-2013 at 03:24 PM
    Flying Over a Mountain Range [DILD]

    The setting in this dream was odd, I was at home but I was also in some kind of school class working on a project. There was a decent chunk of this dream that was non-lucid, but I can't really remember much of it now. Basically where my recall comes in is when I became lucid and decided to go for a change of scenery.

    I had decided to try walking through some doors instead of phasing for once, but then I remembered a thing I read where it said that walking through a door is enough to disrupt short-term memory and decided against it. I phased out through the backyard door of my house and flew over the fence and across other peoples' yards. The main thing I remember is that in this yard immediately behind mine, which looked nothing like it does in real life, there was a naked woman sunbathing that just caught me by surprise so I thought it was funny.

    Next thing I knew the area around my house had completely changed, and I was flying high over a bunch of fields and a mountain range. It was extremely vivid and lifelike, I think it may have been the most realistic flying scene I've ever had in a lucid. I was just in awe of all of it, especially the trees, some of which were hanging in the air. They actually had very similar designs to these plants we have hanging from our living room ceiling, so I'm betting that that's what inspired them, but they were much larger, more complex, and very beautiful and natural-looking. The whole view was just incredible.

    Anyway... I started thinking the name S, which I've known lots of people named, and landed somewhere in a field by this compact trailer home. I looked around and saw this girl who was one of the people with that name, this girl SS I knew from acting classes in middle school, and ran up to her and said hi. She pointed out this tornado to me that was in the distance, and either she told me or I just suddenly knew that she was training to be a wind witch and I told her to try to change its path. She wasn't really able to though, but it did pass right by us in a very unrealistic fashion without even creating any feeling of gust, it's more like it just phased out of existence by getting closer to me in my vision.

    After that SS and I just sat down and I wrapped my legs around her, but then
    I woke up.
    lucid , memorable

    Say that one more time, I dare you....

    by Alyzarin on 05-14-2013 at 06:11 PM
    Say that one more time, I dare you.... [Non-Lucid]

    There was a lot that had already happened in this dream that I don't remember clearly now, but it involved me being in the backyard of my house and seeing lots of "villains", like with a supervillain kind of atmosphere to it. I was building a history with these people, though like I said, I don't know what occurred now. Where my memory comes in is a little strange, I was just in my house with my parents and my aunt and uncle and we were having the villains over for some reason. Based on the context, I think it might have been that we were giving them a chance to redeem themselves and prove that they could be regular people.

    This one guy brought his wife and son over, and I really didn't like him. We were all trying to act civilized but I didn't trust him at all, and I got the feeling that he only brought along his family to try to prove that he was a good person which just made me see him as even more of a scumbag. The main thing I remember knowing about this guy was that he normally attacks women in the bathroom and he's pretty sick, so I immediately stood in the hallway opening by the front door. He was introduced to everyone and told that my aunt was in the bathroom, and he started walking in my direction and said that he could go say hi. I just spread myself out across the opening so he couldn't get by me and told him he could wait. He tried to push past me but I got mad and told him that this was my house so it's my rules he has to follow.

    He backed off and I started flipping through this book of pamphlets I randomly had in my hand. Eventually my aunt came out and I walked down the hallway a bit myself and stood right at where it turns, next to both my room and the bathroom. The guy followed me down there so it was just the two of us, and he was suddenly much less civil. He made some crass remark about how he's really in charge and there's nothing I can do about it, or something like that. It was basically this rant about how we're all subservient to him, and I was just getting more and more pissed. I was so angry when he stopped talking that I started responding but couldn't find my words, so I tripped over them at first. He took on this mad face and said "Did I say you could stutter, bitch?" and reached out to smack me, but I grabbed him arm in mid-air and unleashed the fury. I beat the shit out of him, the main parts of which I remember involve twisting his arm and flipping into the wall, grabbing him by the back and repeatedly smashing his skill directly into the edge of the wall, and pummeling him into the ground before picking up his beaten and bloody body and hurling it down the hall into the living room and watching him just kind of twitch and flail around.

    Immediately after this I turned and walked into the bathroom. I started trying to think about how I was going to handle the little boy seeing his dad beaten to a pulp, but at that moment I really didn't care. He had it coming to him.
    non-lucid , memorable

    Too Much Energy

    by Alyzarin on 05-10-2013 at 05:19 PM
    Too Much Energy [DILD]

    This lucid is from last night, I waited a little too long to record it so some of the details from the non-lucid part of the dream that I wrote down I can't really remember anymore. I've got the lucid part down though.

    I was walking past this girl S when I realized I was dreaming, and I followed this path out of a parking garage and it took me to this big open area between really big buildings with a pond in between and an awesome sky view. I was really sped up and started to think that I should calm myself and just try to meditate or something, so I sat down in the grass at the end of one side of the pond. I was just planning on staring at the water but I felt way too stimulated, and the second I tried to keep myself still the dream started reacting. The water started undulating intensely and creating big waves and everything else started to get hazy.

    I looked away and got up and just tried to go into one of the buildings instead, but it was too late to save it and
    I woke up.

    Kick the Dog

    by Alyzarin on 05-08-2013 at 01:52 PM
    Kick the Dog [DILD]

    I was hanging out on the street in front of my old elementary school with J who also went there and O who didn't, though he might have been D for some of this dream.... Anyway, the whole building had apparently been reconstructed and now looked much fancier than it ever has or probably ever will, so we were just checking it out and talking about it for a bit. At one point we decided to go back to my house though, and even though it's literally like right on the other side of the alleyway behind the street we were on, we were suddenly in my car driving there. We come up to the garage and I park in there, even though I don't use the garage in waking life, and my dad's car is in there too but the actual structure of the garage is totally different from normal. This doesn't throw me off though, I just get out of the car and see that my two companions have now become JB, this guy who I used to hang out with all the time when I first started smoking, and DW, this girl I saw a lot in middle school drama classes. I didn't pay much attention to this and just walked into the house.

    As I walked in, I noticed that the whole inside looked wrong too, and there were four little kids sitting on the couch. JB has a little brother and I guess because I just saw him I immediately assumed that we must have accidentally come to his house instead, even though it looked nothing like that either. Also, three of the kids were black like JB but one of them was white, but I still assumed that all four of them were his brothers. His little brother in waking life would recognize me so I guess I also assumed that they all would in this dream, so I just started apologizing and asked if it was their house, and they said yes. I asked them about my dad's car in the garage and the white brother says that it's his car. I just kind of chuckle and smirk and say um, you're like 12, which he actually looked much younger than. He starts to get a little mad, but around that time
    I had started becoming lucid.

    When I had walked in the four brothers had been sitting on a couch in front of windows facing the street outside of the house, but while I wasn't looking the outside scenery had changed. We were now very high up in some apartment building in the middle of a big city, which seems to be a pretty common environment for me in dreams for some reason even though I'm literally almost never anywhere like that in waking life. I notice that there's some random dog running around in the room now, and I decided to see if I could make something else phase through a wall just like I can, so I kicked it toward the window and it passed right through it with no trouble and fell off the side of the building. Next my friend N's dog showed up too and I kicked her out the window as well, but as I could feel her presence falling down the side of the building I reached out with my hands and remotely grabbed ahold of it. I started raising it back up and soon I saw her come back up just hanging in the air outside the window. This was my smoothest telekinesis that I could really remember, so I just directed her around to fly through the air and then made her blast off into the distance, and she looked pretty stiff the whole time, like moving a 3D model that was just in its awkward default stance before being able to run its walking or idling animation.

    After that I wasn't quite sure what to do, but a strange thing happened. This black line appeared down the center of my vision, and I reached my arms out to the side only to see copies of my arms, facing me, so when I moved my right arm the one I saw on the left moved, and vice-versa, and there was nothing in between them other than the line so it looked very odd, no body or anything. I started waving them around trying to leave patterns and parts of my arms would smear out or random things would happen like my fingers would start multiplying, and it looked pretty neat on this downtown sunset sky backdrop, but then the dream faded away.