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    03-16-2013 04:24 PM
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    Entry #3

    by Cloudscape on 03-14-2013 at 11:34 AM
    So we were in this classroom.

    And by we, I mean an odd mixture of my old classmates from different year levels here in the very same classroom. One of them was my ex. It was then that I realized we were in a math class, after seeing my math teacher when I was in 7th grade. Thankfully, no lecture.

    That day was more like a day for document compilation for building our student portfolio which would be submitted by the end of the class.

    Everyone else has already submitted their portfolios but one. My ex.

    So my ex and Mr. Professor talks debates for a while on "why don't you have your portfolio with you?" "I can have it by the end of the class, I just blah blah blah blah blah stuff."

    I'm really poor at recalling conversations, sorry. But I do remember how ex moved next to the seat to mine to ask for assistance. I said sure.

    She asked me if she could borrow some stuff. I remember how disorganized she was. Like her pile of books in her bag was so disorganized. She had a blue bag with white stripes. Then I remember seeing some really big kindergarten crayons lying around some documents while she was sorting out the stuffs she's going to need for portfolio building.

    Anyway, in the midst of all that, she tells me that she forgot something, blah blah. "Can I borrow your pen? I lost mine." I saw a black pen squeezed in between the pile of books in her messy bag. I slowly pluck it out, and show it to her in a teasing manner. No words spoken, but my face was like, "and what's this?"

    she says, "but that's yours.." OH IT IS? SO THIS BAG? THIS MESSY BAG, THIS IS MINE TOO? (I actually never asked that question ever in the dream, I just realized it now - so the pen is in that bag, so that bag was mine? or was it that she borrowed that pen earlier in a dream scene? uhdunno.)

    But anyway, I just answer gently back to her, "it's okay..."

    So she takes it and she carries on doing her thing.

    The rest of the dream scene was much of a blur to me, but I'm still glad anyway that I was able to recall this much despite being only a few bits and fragments, and compile it to an entry.

    I do remember that there was a time I looked straight into her eyes. I observed her face and it was just so detailed. Everything was in the dream, in fact. But one thing I can say is that she doesn't look 101% the same as with the character based on real life. Probably because we haven't really seen each other in ages (in real life) and my brain's having a difficult time recalling her? I'm not so sure about that. Maybe it's a "interpret me" element of a dream too.

    Then I remember moving at the back of the room. I think someone called me. Then I was shown a drawing. Hey, who drew this? And who is this girl with you here? (it was not a realistic drawing, it was more like an anime sketch - i just remember the characters and the fact that we were sitting somewhere on a hill I suppose but I can't recall the background) Um, I made a wild guess but it was wrong - so I made another one, and finally got it right, "oh, this is Hanako! just take a look at it, doesn't that look like Hanako?" (Hanako is a character from a visual novel called Katawa Shouju)

    Then my ex in front row heard about this and was sort of put off when she heard about me and Hanako.

    And that's all I can put together now. I had plenty of other dreams in this session.

    -> OH MY GURSH. for the time I had those "am i dreaming moments"
    -> rubbed my hands together
    -> spun around
    -> demanded INTENSIFY NOW!
    -> but boop. everything faded.
    -> led to a false awakening.
    -> I think this happened over again.

    -> For preparation, I tried this out:
    - Achieving SP - staying there for I suppose 10-15 minutes
    - Moved to my side (first to my left side - but then it wasn't really working out but I did notice that my breathing + snoring pattern was very much that of a sleeping person |only a couple of minutes here like maybe 5 mins not the 10 mins suggested in tuts) but still no luck with achieving anything here so I
    - Moved to my other side (started having vivid visualizations, etc. etc. + I kept seeing those white lights while my eyes are closed + my eyes were like moving up towards the light) <- this is the last thing I remember

    Updated 03-14-2013 at 11:47 AM by Cloudscape

    memorable , dream fragment

    WILD Session #1

    by Cloudscape on 03-14-2013 at 12:28 AM
    First Successful WILD Session

    Disclaimer: ADULT content ahead! Some twisted, morbid content ahead! Proceed with caution!

    Note: This is a WILD Session that popped up around some time before. c: Not really this time where I'm officially challenging myself to master WILD, just before I heard about WILD and wanted to give it a shot. Anyway, without further ado, here's the session:

    I was pretty damn sleepy that time. Just finished a project, and despite the fact I just had sleep a couple of hours earlier, I'm now lying in my bed still really sleepy. weird, this rarely happens. It was around the afternoon. Now I'm not sure the exact time, I'm thinking around 2PM or 3PM or 4PM.

    The *atmosphere* circulating around my mind was just. really. different. from the usual. I can't put it into words, but seriously, it was just so different, like something I've never experienced before! The feeling crawling up to me was just like I could just summon whatever's in mind to a dream at any given point of time.

    So the first thing that came into my mind was: smexy time! c:

    Then I just felt like being sucked into the dream. Not like being vacuum cleaner sucked in, but the images, the scenes - they just kept coming, before I even realized it, I was inside the dream. And let me tell you, it was no smexy time at all.

    Now here's the WEIRDEST thing ever. So I was in the dream, and then I heard a kid. A little kid, asking for help. To stop it. Please, I never meant to hurt them. For some unexplained reason, I got the story that there was a daughter, little kid - abused, and then the stepfather, the abuser - and this little kid, she ended up, I think, killing her step sister. For what reason, I don't know, can't remember. So the stepfather was furious. Next thing I can remember, I was like floating in a room that looks like the one next to mine (in the real world), so I browsed through the computer and saw like an article piece of a kid who killed blah blah blah. Actually, I forgot what's exactly in that article piece, I just know I saw a news article and all that.

    And then there, I was in the body of the little kid. And I felt something inside of me. Like the stepdad's you know what. And it was painful. Not the kind of sex sensation I've ever experienced in a dream kind of painful.

    Then I woke up. The transition from a little girl body to my own felt like a wave overcoming me. It was weird. The first thing that came into my mind then was that how weird everything in the dream was. If you would take a look at it, it's actually somewhat realistic - like the plot is realistic and all that, but there are fragments (like elements in the dream) from the dream that are simply distorted. Though I think those distorted stuff would play some roles in dream interpration, etc. etc.

    Anyway, so that's one of the dreams I've had in my WILD session.

    I remember having a couple more, and I can still recall their scenes, but I won't put it in here anymore as their just bits and fragments. What I can is that they were extremely vivid and just very long dreams + far from my usual dreams

    Updated 03-14-2013 at 12:34 AM by Cloudscape

    non-lucid , dream fragment

    Dream Journal #1

    by Cloudscape on 03-13-2013 at 07:58 AM
    Disclaimer: I'm just going to lay out here a straight forward 'all-that-I-remember-from-last-night' journal. I'm not really used to making my journal literali-ish (how some DV members seem to make their journal entries like they come out from a Harry Potter book or something! which is a good thing, btw that I admire - just something I can't do now ;_; )

    Last night was really different. Short yet vivid dreams are something I'm not really new to, but over the past few weeks, I haven't really been getting any of those so last night I was sort of just wow'd when I woke up realizing I've had at least 3 of those kinds of lucid dreams last night - all from only 3-6 of sleep.

    Here's what I remember about waking up, etc.:
    First, I woke up an hour I think after laying on my bed to rest, but wow it felt a lot more than that. I was just really too exhausted to think about things that time though so I immediately went back to sleep after checking the clock and my laptop.

    2nd, I woke up again - just a short waking up, I was too sleepy so I went back immediately to bed after checking the clock

    3rd, same thing happened.

    On to the dream:
    My dreams last night in a nutshell. One word. Crazy. One part I can recall, I was in school. I was walking along the corridor when I saw this crush of mine. Weird thing, crush was leading her class to clean up and all that. I assume it was dismissal time and the class was going nowhere unless the whole room was cleaned. So she was there, in front of the class, asking everyone to arrange the chairs, then I marched in lol, then she just smiled at me sweetly. I don't remember anything after that. I just remember marching to my own classroom and that's where I saw Crush #2. Crush #2 was with me started making out. Speaking of make outs, on another part of a dream, I recall basically staying in this sort of center. There was this cute girl who sort of resembles Mandy from Billy and Mandy (yes, a cartoon character), then when we got back to our car, she transformed to a human. Like to Ellen Paige human and we started making out too.

    When I woke up, it was all goody good feeling inside of course. I just felt weird because naturally, the people my dream characters are based on ARE far from how those characters behaved in my dreams. For example, crush #1? The one leading the cleaning in the room? Not the leader type really. More like retreat to a little corner in the room. Total introvert, which I don't mind really. I think that's just the way she is and that's actually very cute of her, but yeah - just to point out the differences.

    Well that's about everything that I remember from the dreams. Not much with details, just everything there is to it: making out with dream characters.

    Note: Last night, I applied mantras for the first time in a while. I also switched my sleeping position. I used to sleep with my head on the foot of the bed and just lying with my belly on top, not facing left or right. Just straight lying on my belly. I switched to that when I wanted to improve my dream. Now I went back to my old position and was shocked at the results. Also yesterday, we went out for an exposure trip - did a lot of walking, etc. I haven't really been out of the house for a while now so the rigorous activities might have added to it. My visualization also became more intense, probably because of all the site seeing. I also took 2 short naps during our trip back home. I've read that taking naps help in giving more vivid dreams. I was also very sleepy the time we arrived home. This might have helped a lot.

    Updated 03-13-2013 at 08:02 AM by Cloudscape