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    34 Visitor Messages

    1. View Conversation
      XD I posted that like two months ago!
    2. View Conversation
      Thanks man! Unfortunately, my resignation from staff has cut down my avatar size limit to 125kB instead of 700-something, so I probably won't be able to use many good ones anymore.
    3. View Conversation
      Puffin has yet to write you a poem
      So I will take the initiative and start to rhyme
      I can't get my mind off these garden gnomes
      Because they are coming alive in the nighttime

      They are marching, dancing, and even singing
      My yard has become a mess, full of weeds and despair
      The gnomes seem to really like peeing...
      All over my glorious yard and even in their long hair

      This poem is quite random
      And my mind is wandering
      But these gnomes...I just can't Stand'em
      I think I need to go auctioneering

      The gnomes are now sold
      My yard is now green
      I got a lot of gold
      So I turned into The Queen.
    4. View Conversation
      Haha, we thought you would!
      As you probably already know, I wasn't the one who wrote it... my poetry-writing skillz are horrid.
    5. View Conversation
      Oh...I see how it is. You thank Puffin for the poem, when i'm the one that wrote it!
    6. View Conversation
      Happy birthday!
    7. View Conversation
      Happy birthday Clyde!
    8. View Conversation
      Hey...long time no speak..hows ur studies?
    9. View Conversation
      I read in a post you do parkour! Do you have any videos up?
    10. View Conversation
      check out The IT Crowd. best british sitcom ever. that and father ted.
    Showing Visitor Messages 1 to 10 of 34
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    About Clyde Machine

    Basic Information

    Date of Birth
    October 6, 1990 (33)
    About Clyde Machine
    LD Count:
    Above 31.
    I'm Clyde Machine. I do a lot of thinking, I talk to everyone, and I enjoy sugary foods.

    Anything else you need to know you'll find on my Twitter (@deadlymetal86, http://www.twitter.com/deadlymetal86) or on my blog (http://clydemachine.blogspot.com/).
    Country Flag:
    Midland, Michigan
    I enjoy a number of things. Typical guy stuff and other cool stuff thrown in.
    College student.
    How you found us:
    Reference from Vlad Dolezal.


    DV Dictionary. / Verious: a definition. /

    I'm not on DV much these days, but I'll try to toss a cool dream or two into my DJ.


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    12-06-2011 05:41 AM
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    04-18-2013 07:26 PM
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      Night Stalker

      Baron Samedi
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      Back from Hiatus!

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      aka Pedobear

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    View Clyde Machine's Dream Journal

    Recent Entries

    The President Would Like To See Noah's Ark.

    by Clyde Machine on 11-06-2011 at 11:37 PM
    I am in a tiny classroom for kindergarteners, but I'm with Chellie and Aaron. I am seated facing them, they are seated forward, and all three of us are quoting lines from funny videos we've all seen. Chellie faces the blackboard at the front of the class and goes to say something, but doesn't seem to want us to hear it. She has her hair in two blonde braids and grabs each with her hands, making another video reference which I find hilarious. She looks around to me, clearly not expecting anyone to hear what she'd said, and laughs with me about it.

    Later, I'm the President of the United States, and am in some huge dark room where a number of large items are on display. I understand the items to be important relics and artifacts collected and saved by the American government. I'm casually playing with a straight bass that is twice as tall as me, when my butler shows me an artist-drawn picture of Noah's Ark, another artifact the government apparently has possession of. I get excited at the prospect of going to see it, and we change rooms, but the dream moves to a different scene, and I don't see the boat.

    Updated 11-06-2011 at 11:39 PM by Clyde Machine


    With Chelsea at the Food Court.

    by Clyde Machine on 10-31-2011 at 04:52 PM
    I dreamed Chels and I were at the mall sitting on a cushioned bench/love-seat thing. My arms were around her, and we leaned against one another as she closed one of her hands around one of mine. After a short while she fell asleep.

    The dream shifts and we are on a different but similar love-seat in the same area, when she lays sideways onto my lap. I readjust my body so she's lying against me and I wrap my arm around her. We were talking about something but I don't recall what.

    Early on in the dream, before we were on the love-seats, I had ordered some food for us at the food court. When I noticed they were taking a terribly long time getting Chellie's food ready, I left her on the seat and went to the counter. On the way I read the receipt, trying to remember what I'd ordered, but didn't recognize or understand any of the items listed. I stopped trying to figure it out when I read the item "1x www.JOOBIE.com," and handed the lone worker at the counter the receipt.
    (That site is not as interesting as it sounds. =P)

    Since I couldn't remember what I'd ordered for Chellie, I just told her, "Can I pick up the order that has a fried chicken sandwich?" She gave me a look like she hadn't a clue what I was talking about, but tried to fake a smile to hide it, and started punching buttons on the cash register. Before the dream ended, I heard someone say, "She's the first woman to discover a whole new world," and I understood that it was referring to the cashier dealing with my order.

    We never did get that order.

    EDIT: Another dream fragment remembered from earlier.
    I'm in a church surrounded by people with their heads down. Everyone is singing and then they all cross themselves. I try blending in - I hum along and place my hand vertically on my chest without crossing myself. My efforts fail and someone announces, "There's a rebel among us," with a laugh. Everyone disperses and I walk about the church before the dream ends.

    Updated 11-01-2011 at 01:22 AM by Clyde Machine


    The Donnie Darko Dream

    by Clyde Machine on 10-24-2011 at 04:36 AM
    Coming from an earlier dream, I am with a couple very young friends, running through a muddy pond-sized puddle. I avoid some deep spots to make sure I donít wind up drowning myself, since I canít swim, and run through shallow waters with the group to join a group of unfamiliar older adults on a lawn on the other side. I suspect they are of some relation to me, but I donít actually know any of them.

    Lead by a tall man among them, they are reciting some long historic quote which I recognize but havenít memorized. When theyíve finished I walk around a bit and overhear someone asking another how to install Linux on their computer Ė they ask, ďdo you have to use a CD?Ē I can answer their question, but I feel like I need to drive somewhere. After thinking about it a moment, I choose not to interject into his conversation, and hop in a silver mini-SUV and drive off the lawn, down a driveway that has appeared where the pond was earlier.

    I stop at the road (also replacing the aforementioned pond), still able to hear the would-be Linuxerís questions. I think about driving off like Iíd planned to, then I throw the car in reverse, hop out, and push the car by its hood backward to the group of people, intent on helping out. (Somehow Iím able to drive the car without operating the steering wheel, but I think nothing of it.)

    When I arrive back at the group, I push the car away and find that theyíve all gone silent. One elderly man, an ex-sailor possibly a veteran of military service, stands from his lawn chair and approaches me, and begins reading a script. It reads like a funeral speech, or something youíd hear on Memorial Day. The manís son was killed/died early in his young life, and the group gathered every year to remember him. However, the man began directing the speech at me, going off the script to tell everyone that I am dishonouring his memory, ďstanding there looking all cool, wearing the shoes he could have worn.Ē

    His words were painful for both of us, but the sadness and guilt I was feeling was quickly replaced with anger. I became thoroughly pissed and pulled off my sunglasses, disgusted that he was publicly blaming me for his sonís death. He continued to rant, both of us standing there face-to-face with no more than three feet between us, and I could feel the situation about to escalate. He pulled out an oversized handgun, loading it with a single shotgun shell. Someone came up from behind me and tried to talk him down, as did I, but to no avail. I tried to get closer to him with a kind of diagonal sidestep in the hopes of disarming him, while making it difficult for him to aim at me, but I wound up twirling as I moved. Obviously, I start to freak out because Iím moving much more slowly than Iíd intended to, and am expecting to feel a bullet break my skin. However, the ex-sailor appears to have turned into a short dark-skinned boy and is having trouble figuring out how to operate the gun. Since I canít run, I twirl a couple more times, and someone manages to stop him Ė I donít see how exactly.

    I find myself on the road in the silver mini-SUV, and Iím barreling down the road. I am on the phone with the boy that saved my life, and I excitedly laugh that the scene Iíd just witnessed reminded me of the movie Donnie Darko. I ask the boy on the phone if heís seen Donnie Darko, and explain the comparison: if I hadnít started down the driveway in the SUV, then returned to try answering the Linux guyís question, I might not have survived Ė it made sense in the dream. He agrees with a laugh, and the dream ends.

    Earlier dream fragments:
    I am with Chelsea listening to an old woman talking. She is switching between French and English, with a heavy Mexican accent to all her words. I interpret the French words for Chelsea where I recognize them.

    Iím on a train which is driving on the freeway, high above a big city, and the door next to me is open to allow me a clear line of sight to the people driving cars next to us. One person is driving what appears to be a blue-coloured variation of the Dalek suit from Doctor Who, and I call it a TARDIS (without realizing my mistake). Iím incredibly entertained by seeing this as a functioning vehicle.

    Updated 10-24-2011 at 04:42 AM by Clyde Machine


    The Things I Do To Impress A Girl

    by Clyde Machine on 10-20-2011 at 09:28 PM
    I dreamed I was joining the US Air Force. I was in a room with a lot of strangers, almost like a kind of waiting room for a train station, about to leave for either training or some kind of active combat. I was wearing a green uniform and looking at my military ID card in my wallet when I realized I didn't want to do this - I was doing it to impress a girl, I think. I started to reverse my dream, watching earlier sequences go in reverse like a movie being played backwards. I wasn't aware it was a dream, I just knew I could undo my life at that point. I stopped just before applying for the Air Force, and I don't remember doing anything besides before the dream ended.

    Updated 10-20-2011 at 10:58 PM by Clyde Machine


    Resisting Conversion from Morgan Freeman

    by Clyde Machine on 10-18-2011 at 04:51 PM
    I am in an unfamiliar house with many other people. It's clearly some kind of social gathering for older adults, with whom I somehow blend in. While mingling I come across the host, a black man in a white robe who looks like Morgan Freeman, but younger. He is addressing the whole room and although I don't hear all his words, I realize he's about to go around the room asking what everyone's spiritual beliefs are, and it becomes apparent that it is a move to single me out as the only non-believer in the room.

    Of course, he goes straight to me and places his hands on my shoulder, smiling wordlessly, expecting me to profess my beliefs. I tell him uncomfortably that I'm atheist, which leads the whole room to let out an awkward laugh. The host turns to the crowd gathered around us and mentions that I am in need of saving and that I need to accept their God, clearly assuming I'd simply not been exposed to it. I correct him in his assumption and say, "I was born Catholic, raised Christian, and chose to be an agnostic atheist." This was more disturbing to them, which produced an even more awkward laugh. I laugh myself, feeling less uncomfortable than before, and am left alone.