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    17 Visitor Messages

    1. View Conversation
      I've had many pretty dreams! Like ones that focused on my dresses before~^w^ I remember, in one, I used my dress as a parashoot...x) and i've dreamt about flowers! Do you have a favorite kind of flower dear?


      Yeah, not feeling good stinks lol I should walk my dog right now before i feel to icky to walk him again xD;
    2. View Conversation
      I've had many pretty dreams! Like ones that focused on my dresses before~^w^ I remember, in one, I used my dress as a parashoot...x) and i've dreamt about flowers! Do you have a favorite kind of flower dear?


      Yeah, not feeling good stinks lol I should walk my dog right now before i feel to icky to walk him again xD;
    3. View Conversation
      Hi! I'm back on! I might eat/walk my dog soon, though. Also, I might sleep more, cuz i feel kinda sicky today from sleep deprivation.....DX dumb insomnia xD

      One dream I had last night did have a lot of snow and it snowed in our house, though.....it was pretty.

    4. View Conversation
      I hope you get to play it soon! Its a very good one^^ *curtsy(swy)*

      Wow! Your dog sounds awesome. Our dog likes to act like he know nothing just to spite us...xD;

      I should go see them soon!^^

      I'm gonna try to rest more now. TTYL
    5. View Conversation
      I hope you get to play it soon! Its a very good one^^ *curtsy(swy)*

      Wow! Your dog sounds awesome. Our dog likes to act like he know nothing just to spite us...xD;

      I should go see them soon!^^

      I'm gonna try to rest more now. TTYL
    6. View Conversation
      I LOVE BEAUTY AND THE BEAST!!! Its soo romantic X'3 I also really like Alice in Wonderland. And Pinnochio is awesome too!

      I wish my ps2 still worked so I could play kingdom hearts one and two again. xD Ahhh...I have 358/2 days though and beast's castle is in there, too!^^ I love it x3;

      What kind of dog is your family dog?

      You live on your own? Awesome....i am SOOOO not ready to leave my mommy yet T~T;;; heck im still rather dependant on her in some ways..(i have autism btw)

      I've been starting to look at pictures of cats to help with my axiety about people (that i suggest we never talk about^^;; ).
    7. View Conversation
      I LOVE BEAUTY AND THE BEAST!!! Its soo romantic X'3 I also really like Alice in Wonderland. And Pinnochio is awesome too!

      I wish my ps2 still worked so I could play kingdom hearts one and two again. xD Ahhh...I have 358/2 days though and beast's castle is in there, too!^^ I love it x3;

      What kind of dog is your family dog?

      You live on your own? Awesome....i am SOOOO not ready to leave my mommy yet T~T;;; heck im still rather dependant on her in some ways..(i have autism btw)

      I've been starting to look at pictures of cats to help with my axiety about people (that i suggest we never talk about^^;; ).
    8. View Conversation
      Thank you, please do avoid it at all costs. You almost brought back my former axiety that toke me like ages to get over....(and has nearly droven me to suicide one too many times)(i'm sorry for the dark dark truth but its true now not another word about your 'friendlessness'... )

      I made a picture with fairy dusted kittens! Sadly, its not allowing me to post it to you.....T~T

      Whats your favorite disney film?

      Your Harbor Seal sounds adorable <3

      I have a dog so I guess dogs are my favorite animals but I really love cats too...
      ^_^
    9. View Conversation
      Ah. Yeah, I don't like hearing about lack of friendships from other people much because of my autism....soo, please try to stay off topics like that one, okay?

      Namine is so awesome <3

      Uhhh...do you like kitties? :3

      I had an imagionary friend, but she was like, an evil one so i don't like to remember her....

      My best friend irl, i'll admit, is my riku plushie. ^w^ I should totally show you a picture of him sometime you will love him. xD (isn't riku just soo HOT??!!! xD <3)
    10. View Conversation
      Ah. Yeah, I don't like hearing about lack of friendships from other people much because of my autism....soo, please try to stay off topics like that one, okay?

      Namine is so awesome <3

      Uhhh...do you like kitties? :3

      I had an imagionary friend, but she was like, an evil one so i don't like to remember her....

      My best friend irl, i'll admit, is my riku plushie. ^w^ I should totally show you a picture of him sometime you will love him. xD (isn't riku just soo HOT??!!! xD <3)
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    About DarkKiky0

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    Age
    28
    About DarkKiky0
    LD Count:
    Crap ton
    Biography:
    I am a unique individual who suffers from many different brain problems. I have a best friend who I consider to be my sister, an actual blood related brother, and I had a cat but I let him stay in the place where he was raised, with my neighbor who has a barn, so he could live the rest of his days in cat heaven. My parents still have the family dog, who proceeds to whine like a baby when he sees me or my brother after so long.

    About lucid dreams. My brain taught itself how to lucid dream as a way for my nightmares to not be as terrifying, I never even knew lucid dreaming was a thing for people to try to achieve. It's always just been who I am, I'm glad I now I have a name for it. I have struggled to become the person I am today and that's still not completely normal, but hey I'm not trying to be "normal", I'm trying to be myself which is by no means normal. I'm just trying to be myself without all the mentally draining problems.

    In my spare time I read, write, watch anime, play games, and drawing, I am also a vegetarian. I have a deep passion for all these things and will talk for as long as you let me about any of them :P I also enjoy just about every type of music there is, with the exception of some country and rap music. My most prominent favorite music types are pop, rock, dubstep, celtic, and classical, Beethoven being my favorite composer next to Chopin. Ahhh, now I miss my cat. His name was Chopin :(

    I plan on getting another pet because I am finally in a place where I can get a pet. It's only a matter of time. Anyway, thanks for taking the time to read about me, and remember, there can only be one! (if you knew my last name you would get that joke lol)
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    If more people actually tried or learned about things before dismissing them, then the world would be a happier, more open minded place.

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    Recent Entries

    10/21/14- pending nuclear apocalypse

    by DarkKiky0 on 06-22-2014 at 08:31 AM
    It's been 7 months sense I last posted so I will do a lot of updating

    This dream had a lot going on but the part I remember the best is the last part. I returned to my home where I lived with my parents, brother, and his fiancée. (The home was a complex that housed multiple families and it was raised above the ground) when I got back I found that this stranger was trying to steal my money, but I managed to run him off and get my money back. When I returned to my room afterwards I found that my stuff had been stolen. I became furious and went about looking for the criminal when I found they returned to the scene of the crime. It was two teenage girls. The blonde had been the mastermind, and I got her to confess by pinning her to the ground via holding her neck and waist down on the ground and I started trying to stretch her when she finally agreed to bring my stuff back. They left after showing me everything was back in my room when a pretty African American woman came to our place. She asked to speak with us in private, so my parents and I followed her outside. She told us that she worked for the government and they discovered that missiles were going to be launched at America wiping out half the population and we were in the spot that was going to be in the center of the explosion. She wouldn't say who was launching them, but she said our family had the option of buying tickets to a train that would take us to an underground bunker. We only had enough for 4 people and my dad agreed to stay behind. My parents went inside to start packing essentials while I looked up at the sky to see a solar eclipse. I became very frightened and shook my head then looked back up to see a normal moon in the sky, so I calmed down a little. I started packing my stuff, then went with my mom to put our things with my aunts because they said they'd let us put our stuff with theirs. I noticed that everyone in the complex was packing, but there wasn't a panic. It was a very intense calm, the air was heavy with fear. The sky started flashing red and my aunt told me it was practice for the people who had to stay behind, so they would know when to brace themselves. It was a very dark night even though the moon was full. As I finished packing, the speakers came on and said it was time to board the train. We got our stuff and filed down the ramps to the station. As we stood about to board, it finally sunk in that my dad wouldn't be coming. I could tell my family cared but they wouldn't show it. They stood on the train waiting for me, but I couldn't board. My dad and I don't have a close relationship and it's like this dream made me realize how much I cared. He insisted I get on and I finally did. As the train pulled away I couldn't take the pain and shouted "I love you!" With teary eyes. He shouted it back before he got out of ears reach and the train descended underground. This is where I woke up.

    This dream was very emotional for me. I felt such an intense mixture of fear, pain, and anger that I was genuinely glad that it wasn't real when I woke up. Any help with interpretations are appreciated.

    Cheating is not fun

    by DarkKiky0 on 11-14-2013 at 08:18 PM
    I had this dream this evening about cheating on my husband. We recently got married a month ago on the 12th, and his dream really disturbs me. The dream starts where I'm with my family and my husband at this Summerhome. There are a few other people there that are not related to my family, and I have no idea why they were there. We're standing outside talking about something when I see this little girl and her father. Something I was talking about caught his attention, and we start arguing because he thinks he knows more about the subject than I do. I start saying how I definitely know more about the subject because I've had three years of classes on it and since it's been a while since I've had the classes, I have had years and years of experience on the matter. He asked me if that is true, and when my mother backed me up he seemed impressed. We start getting along a lot better after this and his young daughter and I become quick friends. We hang out throughout the rest of the day and things keep happening that needed me to resolve them and he seems like he is becoming more and more impressed with me. Suddenly, he gets serious and asked if he can see me inside alone to talk with me. His daughters watching like she's really excited and knows what's going to happen, and I follow him out of curiosity wondering what's going on. We go into a room where he stops and admits to me that he is falling in love with me. I realize that I'm falling for him too, and he becomes very happy that he has finally found someone that he could be with after his wife passed away. That's when I realize something: I can't be with him because I am married. He can tell that I have become incredibly sad and asked me what's wrong. I show him the ring on my finger and tell him that I am married. He seems taken aback and becomes upset telling me that should not have let him on. I did nothing of the sort! I was hanging out with him with every intention of just being friends and he was the one he was interpreting something out of nothing. We go our separate ways, but I cannot take my mind off of him. I suddenly become very sad that I had to be married and cannot be with him and realize that I may like him more than my husband. This thought upsets me because I'm very deeply in love with my husband, and henceforth become very confused about everything. I start wondering to myself why me and this man can't have an affair? He seems much too honorable for something like that, but I keep wishing he will come to me and tell me that he wants that. I go back outside when my husband arrives From wherever he was beforehand. We walk around, hanging out, all the while realizing that the guy who likes me is watching me from a distance. I realize that the only reason I am hanging out with my husband is because I feel obligated to. We go into a room and start talking when the man enters because he needed to get something out of that room. My husband starts talking with him, because he's just one of those people that likes to be friends with everybody. The entire time me and this man are looking at each other with heavy intensity and I suddenly send my husband out of the room to get something for me that I know will take him a while to get. As soon as he leaves, the man and I start making out until my husband returns. He said he could not find what I wanted and continues the conversation with the man. I start talking to my husband to distract him from the looks that I'm giving the man which indicate that I want him and me to have an affair. The man nods and I realize that it would be hard because we live so far apart but it can still be done, and I get him to give me his number without my husband knowing. I feel incredibly rotten about everything thats been going on and the arguments with myself inside my head never seem to cease. suddenly, my husband wants to go to the park and the other guy asks to come along, so we take separate cars and start driving to the park. When we get there we meet an old dream ex of mine. She keeps talking about her lingering feelings for me and the only thing I have to say to her is I don't know who you are over and over again. My husband is becoming upset that she's there when suddenly she sees the look that the man is giving me. She asks me if the man and I are seeing each other, and of course I deny it, but she keeps insisting so intently that finally everything becomes revealed. She gets upset and leaves and I realize that my husband now knows everything. I am so ashamed of myself that I can't even turn to look at him, but I know that he looks very betrayed. The man, seeing how I treated my ex so badly, decides that he doesn't want anything to do with me. So him and my husband get into their cars and leave me stranded at the park. I don't know how I got back, because I'm suddenly back at the Summerhome, but I got the feeling my mom picked me up. I am incredibly upset realizing how much of an idiot I was and that the only reason I wanted to be with the man was because I wanted to be a mother to his daughter and felt sorry for her being so young to have lost her mother, and that I should never have tried to cheat on my husband, when I see his mother sitting down against the wall looking at an iPad. I ask her if she knows where he is and my mom says that he went to one of my old hometowns and is going to live with another woman who has the same name as me. I ask if he is going to be involved with her and she says no, the woman already has a boyfriend. I feel relieved but then I suddenly become very intent on getting a hold of him and ask his mother if she has had any progress finding him. She says not yet and I start freaking out, screaming find him! She smiles and says that she has found a number that she believes is his and calls it, handing me the phone. Somebody answers and I realize that it is him. I say his name and he suddenly becomes very hurt sounding and says he does not want to talk to me. The rest of the dream is me begging him over the phone to forgive me and trying to explain to him the situation, when I wake up. I become incredibly relieved that it was all a dream, but this really confuses me because I know I would never ever do this in real life and I'm wondering why I had this dream.

    Updated 11-14-2013 at 08:28 PM by DarkKiky0

    Categories
    nightmare , memorable , non-lucid

    9/20/13 dream- school and toga

    by DarkKiky0 on 09-21-2013 at 07:06 AM
    I had this dream last night that I honestly don't know what to make of. Lots of stuff happened, but this is the gist.

    I was living in a live in school (it was not college because we lived in the class itself and learned whatever the teacher felt like teaching us) that was located in a town build onto the side of a mountain. I believe the town was called New York except it was not. We were doing stuff in class and I remember that I was sitting next to a girl that I used to sit next to in high school that I really don't like. We were looking at papers and she kept doing stuff that annoyed me. Then everyone got up and we walked around the class. People were eating and then I noticed that I had a lump in my throat and I had a feeling that it was a chunk of something caught in there. I started coughing, trying to bring it up and couldn't. A few people from class started offering advice as how to cough to bring it up and my coughing turned into hacking. After a minuet of that, I suddenly got the urge that I was going to throw up. I dropped suddenly on my hands and knees and coughed up a wad of paper and a small chunk of something. I looked closer at the paper and found that it was a fancy folded paper plane. I felt like that the girl I don't like had something to do with it, but then someone in class came in wearing a toga and everyone else wanted to follow suit. We all put on togas and agreed to wear them for the rest of the day. Some girls who weren't in the class came in and my friend and I started talking about how skanky they were because they would go out and find random guys to do it with. I started feeling self conscious because the girls were dressed slutty and it made me feel unattractive. Everyone suddenly wanted to go outside and walk around town so we all filed out the front door and I decided to watch one of the skank girls to see what she does. I noticed she started walking around all slow and absent mindedly, then a guy came up and asked her if she wanted to go somewhere. I suddenly had a need to feel prettier, so I started walking along the guard railing that kept people from falling off the mountain the way she had and soon enough a guy stopped me. He had a dark air about him and talked like someone who knew what to say to get people to do stuff. He asked if I wanted to go somewhere with him and I noticed that a few beefy guys started to slowly circle around. I suddenly felt very uneasy and wanted nothing to do with any of this, I mainly just wanted a boost in my self esteem. I asked if I could think about it and he told me I could, so I went back to the school. I was hanging around outside and the school janitor came up talking about how he knew a cop who did set ups. I asked if what the guy that stopped me was doing something illegal by asking random girls to go with him and he said yes. I asked if he could set up an arrest so he texted his cop friend and set it up. I went back to the guy after some time, and before I said anything I noticed the cop behind him making a gesture that said "Is this him." I nodded yes and they arrested him. I watched them taking him away and ignored all the insults he was throwing at me, then I went back to school. I was talking to my friend about how I might need to flee the country because being here made me feel unsafe seeing as I just got a sex peddler arrested when I got a text from the cops saying "oops he got out." I called them and asked what was going on and the guy was talking in circles and stammering, then I noticed one of the things he said sounded familiar so I asked "Is this him..." and he said "Of course this is me, who did you think it was??" I was working on convincing him that I just got scared when I noticed a pikachu smiling up at me, then I woke up.

    I felt incredibly relieved that it was all a dream when I dozed back off and had a brief dream about him telling me he would find me, so I jerk woke myself up. I stayed awake after that.
    Categories
    non-lucid , nightmare , memorable

    9/5/13 lucid dream- sexual vendetta

    by DarkKiky0 on 09-05-2013 at 04:28 PM
    This dream is incredibly long so I'm only going to type up the lucid part.

    I was walking through a dark field with black dirt and dark grey brown twisted trees with occasional rundown stone buildings when I realized I was dreaming and went lucid. I suddenly decided that instead of doing anything with super powers, I wanted to...well... So using lucid means I made a guy appear from around a building and using even more lucid control, managed to get his and my pants off, because apparently this guy didn't want to do anything, but I only managed to get a few minuets of doggy style action before I woke up. I did not give up. I went back to sleep, trying as hard as I could to go in lucid, and It worked. I was in a dark run down building this time when I called the guy lucidly and repeated the same steps and got the same results. I woke up again at the same spot. I realized I must have been trying too hard and would try something different. I managed to go back to sleep a third time, this time I didn't really pay too much attention to my surroundings, but I think I was in the woods. I went into the dream lucid again and called up the guy a third time lucidly. This time I took things slower, using half lucid influence and the other half letting him do what he wanted. We only got to our cloths getting taken off, and before anything happened he said he wasn't in the mood and walked away. I probably gave him too much independence and not enough lucid control. I gave up and went along with where this dream wanted to take me.

    This dream was very interesting. I won't go into details but the gist of it is my dream character was trying to find a husband and had to choose between four different guys. In the end, she ends up with no one and my dream does a 30 or so years later bit about how she sees the guys again and finds out how happy they are with their spouse and kids, and she is sad that she never found anyone for herself. Then she sees that one of the guys in on his death bed and visits him before I wake up to my alarm.
    Anyway, I can't believe I was able to go lucid in so many dreams in the same night progress.

    9/3/13 lucid dream- bunch of stuff

    by DarkKiky0 on 09-03-2013 at 04:35 PM
    I had this lucid dream this morning.

    It starts out where I am standing in a field, watching over my flock of sheep monsters, when a giant black mechanical dog as big as an elephant comes and starts attacking them. I looked over to see if the defensive tank I build in a previous dream was working to stop it, but it had been left on stationary mode, so I ran up to it and flipped the switch to defensive mode. I jumped on the top and had to hold on as it started charging the dog. The dog fought back with both teeth and guns as my tank like machine rammed at shot back. The fight took us all over the field, and at some point my parents had come in through the north gate (for anyone who has ever played Oblivion or Skyrim, the gate looked like the gates you use to enter in the cities. Yes, I have been playing too much Oblivion lately) and were watching everything go down. The fight got to the other end of the field, behind a gray stone barn, when I realized I was dreaming and went lucid. Suddenly, becoming very tired of a fight I knew would last a long time, I made the dog machine and my tank disappear, and replaced them with a friendly, normal sized, brown dog. The dog was a little too friendly however, and proceeded to push me down and dry hump me until finally my parents came over and the story of the dream continued. My mom was taking me to a church for sunday service, and for some reason we had to wait in an incredibly long line before we could get in. The church was on top of a hill and the line led all the way to the bottom of the hill. We finally made it to the top, and I noticed this teenager, about 16-years-old, kept looking at me on the way up. Before we went inside he offered me a sip of his drink. We got inside and I was ushered into this room, then found myself alone. I went back out of the room and saw an old friend from high school sitting in the next room. She said something to me and after we talked a bit, then I left. I went back outside and left my mom to whatever she was doing, when my fiancé showed up. We walked around where everyone was now standing in groups, talking. The teenager came up to me again and this time he let me have the rest of his bottle of tea. I said thank you and walked around a bit. I took a sip of it, then threw it away because I got a strange feeling that he did something to it. I went up to a tree and stood under it while my fiancé sat down to my right. I stood there, watching the teenager walk around staring at me, and every now and again he would come up and say something to me, making my fiancé look not very happy. Suddenly, the teenager came up to me again, but this time he was wearing a red super hero costume and a helmet, and he tried to kiss me. I turned my head away and said "No, I don't want to kiss you." so he stopped, but he kept standing there smiling at me, when my fiancé got up and shoved him away from me saying "Don't you ever get near my girl again." The teenager came back with a "If she was happy with you I wouldn't keep seeing her standing around looking depressed." I just stood there, listening to their back and forth, then decided to take a walk down to the road at the bottom of the hill. They both followed me and when we got there their spat continued. I was looking at the teenager blankly when three tan creatures that looked like human sized versions of the monster I created in a previous dream, except without the purple spots, and they were wearing armor and were wielding weapons, popped up and started heading for us. I grabbed my sword and announced their presence to my fiancé and the teenager, who proceeded to pull out their weapons and help me fight. The battle didn't last long, but after defeating one of them I turned around and saw them strike down the teenager. I charged it and slew it quickly. My fiancé took down the other as I ran up to the teenager, dropped to my knees, took his helmet off, and held him up in my arms. He was saying how I should never give up against the evil one and defeat her no matter what, then started saying his goodbyes with tears building up in his eyes. I just watched and listened, feeling very helpless and sad, when he closed his eyes and died. I looked at him for a little bit longer then put him back down. The scene of me taking off his helmet, and him saying his last words, started to repeat itself over and over until I finally woke up.

    I don't know what all that about the evil one was, but in the dream I got the feeling it was her that sent the black mechanical dog and the three guys to kill us. Maybe she will make an appearance in another dream, that happens with me sometimes. I really like it when my dreams are continued in other dreams like that.
    Categories
    lucid , nightmare , memorable