zhineTech
learning. making. doing.

9.4.11.WILD.muffinBattle.txt

this is after a night of gigging, coming home, then getting up a few hours later to do a photoshoot / album cover thing. i napped later, but still felt totally sleep deprived.

i almost accidentally wilded into this. as soon as i closed my eyes there were intense purple swirls, so i decided to count and stay alert. i probably only got to 15 or so... i cant recall the beginning but i was lucid for a while before deciding to do a RC.

i am in the corner of a blue-green painted room. like a baby's room maybe. i look at my hand, its all wavy and electric. at one point i am what i think is under a bed, but now it seems like i was actually looking out of crib railing. i rub my hands together. i am still somewhat aware of my body in bed as i do this, but it feels pretty solid.

i remember to look at myself (i have on striped pajamas?) indeed, i remember to think about my goals and waking life, but the only one i can recall doing is asking dream characters what they represent, and ive forgotten many of them as well.

... i am at a party, in the kitchen, feeling confident and curious about the dream. there are lots of loud girls. im talking to a really drunk blonde about working at the christian academy. the girl is telling me to take the job, implying that there would be lots of willing co workers.
shes trying to get me, i think. then she jumps on my back and when i grab at her my hand brushes her vagina and she makes a moan. this happens when there is dip in the volume of the conversation and everyone starts laughing.

here things get fuzzy, i remember asking characters at the party what they stand for and getting some enlightening answers, but its all very fuzzy. i do recall asking a portly young lad in a booth who was eating what he represented, and ruminating on his answer, but i can't remember it now.

also, my good friend and former trumpet player was there, but he was simultaneously like the Conan O'Brian Triumph the insult comic dog. i found his presence like this amusing and asked what he represented. he said "when you stick to your dreams you can go far." (Our trumpeter had just completed his undergrad and moved to Florida for his masters, while traveling and playing shows with some good sized bands. So this answer makes total sense.")

...

me, dad, and another younger kid go to this fancy hotel / spa / resort type place. dad thinks he has a good plan to somehow get all kinds of free stuff.

we go in and this server woman brings a big pot of coffee, some candy, and some kind of black USB thumb-drive. i know this is a bad idea. the thumb-drive has something to do with how yo pay for stuff. i was ripping the place off a little bit, but dad is wanting to totally not pay for anything. i refuse the coffee and sweets and decide to change the scene.

i wake up and move a bit then go back into the dream.

... i am in a compound / mansion type place, almost like a hospital or mental asylum. its sort of late Victorian, but i have all manner of futuristic technology, like a small hover ship. the place is bad.. not quite evil, but there is a bad dark haired man in charge. i play tricks and pranks on them. there is dark haired kid, as if he is my young doppelganger or is getting blamed for all the stuff i do.

these two girls / nurses are trying to catch me but i keep moving this black bag they put out to catch me. i keep draggin it through the walls. one girl comments on it. then another guy shows up and says, its time we consider this is something else, like im a ghost or something.

at one point i pass through this courtyard and tied to a tree is a big hagrid looking type monster / giant, swinging a club at me. i ask him what he represents and he growls "your fear of the unknown!" all the while trying to get me. (right before bed i had watched some history channel thing on Sasquatch being a primitive human.)

the dark haired man is chasing me in the grocery store, floating and then firing various foods at me, muffin / cupcakes in one scene. i am able to deflect them. then he has some secret configuration that i cannot stop, i decide this is enough and decide to show them power they have never seen before. i forcefully stop everything and wave my hand in righteous fury, dissolving the scene and fading it into something else.

... i am driving up a tiny road, at a ridiculous incline. its almost like i am driving up the side of an obelisk. i seem to remember this road and how dangerous it is, so i have to be careful. here, i lose lucidity, because i am worried about the fall if i don't make it. i am not properly on the road and when i reach the top my way is blocked by a black cable. i reach out and grab it, moving it aside so i can pass and i end up hanging off the edge of the road / tower. i pull myself up and there is a tiny, grey, foot high mailbox. i think this is odd.

... i am riding in a car down the freeway, talking to guy who looks like spy. i say i will be going to Addison virtual academy and he says i will be working for him. i awaken.

7.30.11.GLD.movieTheater.cloudBattle.txt

i woke up and took:
G+C+1 Ltheanine + kril oil + 1b6

i couldnt get back to sleep, my gf and daughter kept waking me up. i took another l-theanine later.

i am trying to fall asleep and sort of passively wilding, watching the lights behind my eyes. a dream starts to form, but its very dark and doesnt feel 3d, it feels third person-ish. i let it go, but i keep my wits about me and every so often i try to move off, to separate myself, to feel or see my body, but i feel stuck.

... im at a huge outdoor concert, but my perspective is that of a video camera surrounded by heavy cloth looking out onto the drums. one of the TOTMs was to play an instrument in a lucid dream. i have being trying to incubate this by focusing on it before bed, either playing a huge concert or playing the piano (which i succesfully did non-lucid last night.) but i cannot move, i am frozen in the camera perspective. when i try to move again the scene shifts.

... and i am out in an impossibly huge concrete skatepark, again in third person. the concert is happening off in the distance, which i think is pretty cool. there are two guys on a longboard, but one of them has one foot on another longboard, and they are carving the huge banks. (just like me, half-asleep, still aware of my body, with one foot in the dream world) <there is no way, they are gonna make it, how is he still standing?> they head straight for me and the scene shifts again...

... i am in a movie theater, sitting along the wall with my gf, waiting for the movie to start. this scene is another step towards the dream. there has been some kind of technical problem and we are all impatient. (i find this to be a reflection of me WILDING and waiting on the dream to start.) i see my friend danny over by some tables and go to talk to him, still feeling my body and not quite "in" the dream, but getting closer.

he has been on a trip, as our recent (imagined) messages have indicated and we talk for a moment. my gf comes over, grumpy and pregnant, and impatient. (this whole time she is sleeping next to me, occasionally moving and making noises.) we find some seats, but i have to force another guy to move so we can sit together.

the image on the movie screen is too small (another comment on the WILD transition) and a guy's voice starts droning. now its more like a class auditorium. he is expounding on the virtues of some scientist, all his accomplishments. i focus on his voice. it gets louder and louder. i try to contain my excitement because i know the real show is about to start! his words starts to blend together and get louder and rumblier and more jumbled together. soon it sounds like a jet engine...

... and i am in!i feel a shift and suddenly motion. i am in a fighter at a tremendous altitude. i look out the window and see full color, 3d, lifelike clouds. i hear machine gun fire as we zoom close to a cloud bank and i see that it is actually some kind of enemy turret disguised in the clouds.

<how am i going to get out? i know, i am a paratrooper and they will "fire" me into the mothership! i can then have some fun before i teleport / fly out and take care of the TOTM or one of my other goals.>



i look out the window again and see a huge floating fortress come into view. it is brown and has long tentacles floating, there are other ships battling around it. just as they are about to lanch my "pod"...

my gfs phone rings and i hurtle back to my body with almost painful force.

ahhh life is so beautiful.

6/29/2011.F.hs.paulasMissedRC
5:30 AM

... I'm in hs rushing between classes. I don't have time to smoke and I'm pissed.

Stairwells. Hitler? Secret books? Escaping by eating our way through a giant pancake?

Later, after waking up and trying to mild...

Paul and I are looking into a doorway, watching his mom (Paula) look at her hands to see if its a dream. Her hands are huge. Paul doesn't seem to care. The dream continues and I soon wake up.

I can't believe that I missed such an obvious sign...

6/27/2011.bulletTime.gig.hotel

1st Dream
5:50am
... I have super powers and a group of us is escaping some kind of prison. I am pretty conscious and excerpt a lot of dream control, but never go lucid. I drop off the roof, hanging by one arm to a brick building and tell everyone to meet up at this secret spot, like two tunnels or a cave.

<should they bring friends? We'd be better fighting back, but someone might reveal our secret location...> as I think this I'm sneaking across a field to the hide out. I see we have been betrayed, they have set up cannons to attack us.

I start yelling for everyone to get inside, I will hold them off. The base is an entrance into the hill, it seems to light up with a white cross type waypoint. I turn back around to face the cannons and everything goes bullet time.

I notice there are hundreds of projectiles, like chunks of concrete coming towards us. There are many more than I expected and some of them are about to hit me. I wake up.

....

I am waiting around before playing a gig, sitting on a brick wall at the entrance to the venue (its like a fairground) across from the door guy. He's got on a black tshirt and has a long gray beard, typical roadie / door guy look.

This other guy tries to go in, but the door guy stops him. Other guy points at me and asks why I don't have to pay. I tell him I'm in the band and make piano fingers at him. The door guy gives me bracelet w pictures of all the bands on it in black and white. My band's picture is hard to see cause there are so many people on it.

I go walking thru the grounds. There are all these booths set up. There is a black girl singing and joking. Later there are white, redneck type people bitching about all the black people dancing. I shake my head at them.

...I'm back in the hotel room w dave and tim. I turn around and walk down the hall past the showr which has an angled long black tray for soap, similar to something you'd see in the nissan plant. It has food residue on it, from earlier, which I think is gross.

I walk down to the end of the hall and its like I'm looking into a bamboo forest and these eyes are staring back at me. Dave comes up and says "there's an ocelot in the room" then quickly hightails it out of there.



i wake up shortly after that.

6.25.11.GLD.skydive.islandCastle

<thoughts>
non-lucid
lucid

my goals:
WILD X
stablize X
incubate a beach dream ?
fly higher / faster than i have before X
talk to a DC X
repeat june TOTM

i laid back down on my back for a while, repeating a mantra of something like "i will remember im dreaming" while visualizing being on the beach, hearing the ocean, and draggin my hands through the sand. i have a hard time getting back to sleep. i rub my jaws and try to keep my focus on dreaming. i turn over and start listening in to the tinnitus in my ears. flashes of light and images start to form.

i am standing behind the couch i am sleeping on. i also have a mixed memory of being in a bathroom looking in a mirror. these are hypnogogic images and very unclear. i can feel that my hands and parts of my body can move away from the other parts, sort of like im swaying in the wind. i remember NOT doing a RC from the previous dream so i look at my hand. ive only got two fingers. sweet! i keep pushing forward and waving my hands but the couch is in the way. i do a forward roll and i am free! i am on the floor in front of the couch like i have just flung myself over it. i believe i have just forcefully separated myself from the hypnogogic imagery into a 3 dimensional dream.

my vision is the classic fuzzy gray and purple. i have on a sleep mask IRL, and it seems i am sort of peeking under the corner of it but i dont want to mess with it just yet, in case i move my physical body and wake myself up. any<that shouldnt really make a difference.> i start rubbing the carpet and my vision improves. it is my living room pretty much as it is IRL. i crawl forward to where some of my rocks are and i pick up a hercamer diamond ive had since i was a boy and start rubbing it. i recall someone on the forum talking about picking up some dirt and i decide to keep it with me and continue to rub it.

i walk to the door and open it. things are fuzzy but somehow i see. i walk down my steps outside and to the sidewalk. i decide im going to ride a skateboard, i imagine myself dragging it along the ground and kicking off and then im skating! i ride down the set of steps and into the parking lot. at first i only do tricks i know and have done IRL. i ollie, then i do a kickflip, then i barely pull off a 180 backside kickflip. then i start doing more complicated things (360 flips) that i cant do IRL. i have on black shoes and it feels kind of overcast (as it is IRL.)

i decide im going to fly now, as ive had a goal to fly higher and faster. i can usually only get about 20 ft in the air. the skateboard has already dissappeared. i lift up my hands and start raising into the air. at first i am just slowly floating up, then i start swimming and pulling myself because im not going fast enough. <i dont have to do this. i can just fly!> once i realize this i rocket way up into the air. my vision goes dim. i hold my hands out in front of my face until they come into focus. i realize i am up in the clouds and i cannot even see the ground. i am a little freaked out by this and start to fall.

at first i am alarmed by the fall, then i think <if royer can jump out of plane, i can at least do this> and i let myself feel all the sensations of the falling, the weightlessness, the wind and clouds rushing by me. it is very realistic and feels exhilerating! my vision fades again and i repeat the hand peering trick. as i do this i see an island fade into sparkling, colorful view, like a swipe cut on video starting at the center and moving to the top and bottom at the same time as i move my hands away from my eyes. it is a vivid green and brown tiny island with a single huge stone building on it.



(i had been trying to incubate a dream of going to the beach and i also wanted to try the TOTM by sitting on the beach and summoning a treasure chest so i guess this was as close as i got, heh. ive also been imagining this elaborate castle / dream home thing that sits overlooking the ocean and this actually could have been my first glimpse of it.)

i am falling fast and i try to level out so i dont hit the water but i do. i splash and land in the water, looking at the apt building. i feel this tremendous force sucking me down. at first i panic and hold my breath. then i relax, knowing no harm can come to me and i breath in the water like its air and make my way towards the island. one of my goals was to talk to a DC so i decide to go and see who i can find.

there is a small rectangular entrance at the base of the gray stone wall that the island sits on. its tiny, or at least it looks tiny. it does something weird to my vision like its in a small window surrounded by black. i go in, but i barely fit in the opening. it seems like im in a cardboard box. i stretch and push on the walls until the area is a little better fit for me, but it's still pretty tight. there are several characters there, and i know they are some kind of covert operations team preparing for a mission. its like a secret tunnel beneath the island. but they are like lego characters and it all seems very "8-bit" so to speak. i remember that i am supposed to talk to a DC and i ask them what they represent. they reply as one "your need for adventure!" which i find very amusing.



then i hear noise IRL and i sense that my gf has come out into the living room to find me asleep on the couch (i had told her i would be getting up and taking the G+C and probably end up on the couch.) suddenly i am sitting in a cardboard box in my living room (there is one there IRL that has a new baby stroller in it) that is all done up like my daughter has been playing in it. i hear my gf moving around and talking to me so i get out of the box and walk around behind the couch.

she is sitting on top of me and she has pulled her shirt up and is putting her breast in my mouth. i smack her on the ass, but she cant seem to feel it. i try to make my body tell her that im dreaming, but i just hear a muffled sound "out there." finally i get right up next to her ear and whisper "im out here." she falls off the couch in surprise, but laughs a bit, knowing about the LD. i decide to get back into my body and take her up on the breast offer. i direct my focus to my body and wake up, facedown, on the couch, no gf, and certainly no breasts in my mouth.