Thread: Being You

The problem is that sometimes people don't want to sex with you if you're just being yourself.

HA HA HA AH!!!!!

that was just tooo funny...
just goes to show, sex is rather a shallow thing when you think about it..
meaning there is a definite difference to loving someone, and simply sleeping with them...
*i feel like i'm digging a hole...see you later!*

Some religons seem to want you to destroy the self.(Buddhism) This is so that you crave nothing.This may be peace but listen to this.

"A man who makes no mistakes is a man who dose nothing.And that is a mistake."


the peace may be claming but where is the fun the joy in it?

I do not want to be just content with myself

I want to be happily content with myself.

I still want lifes joys and (to a lesser exctent) life sarrows

I want inner peace but I dont want to give up my hummanity. Therefore I must be connetnt with me as a person.

I understand the good intention that you're trying to tell everyone here, but you may be limiting us a bit. Some people have arrogance even as a heartfelt trait, and to express that is being themselves. Being ourselves should be the easiest thing in the world to do...hence, BEING ourselves. We just have picked up really bad habits of other influences that don't necessarily go harmoniously with our real personalities.

Originally posted by eyeofgames
I think the only way to have inner peace is to be at peace with your self.Stop trying to be like every one else.Be You.Dont like somthing about your self change it and move on.Love yourself even your faults.Be aware though to not be arrougent or selfish but just be you and like yourself. Understand your self.Know yourself.Be free and take no orders form anyone but yourself.Be cool with you.This is actually harder than it sounds.When I am like this I'll come back and tell you if I have found ture peace.But in theroy if you are at peace with yourself you are at peace with the universe.

There is a poem i read a few years back i think you might enjoy:-

[IF]

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,
If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son!


--Rudyard Kipling

I'm not sure if it has any connection, but reading what you said reminded me of this poem.

Originally posted by Mystical_Journey
[
There is a poem i read a few years back i think you might enjoy:-

[IF]

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,
If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: \"Hold on!\"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son!


--Rudyard Kipling

I'm not sure if it has any connection, but reading what you said reminded me of this poem.

I read this a long time ago...i'm not sure how old i was, but i remember thinking of the imperfection of the human state, and how in many ways, that was a very tall order...because we all get hurt, lied to, cheated on, suffer pain, grief, loss.
And sometimes, it's really hard to keep that smiling face on. Sometimes, you have to give in, and accept how something makes you feel...
To me, it almost sounds like this poem is saying that in order to be a man, or perfect, you have to be a martyr to other's faults and failings...
Who wants the earth, if, by supressing themselves, they don't have the means of expressing the joy that owns it???
I'll be content with all my emotions, good or bad.

Originally posted by irishcream


I read this a long time ago...i'm not sure how old i was, but i remember thinking of the imperfection of the human state, and how in many ways, that was a very tall order...because we all get hurt, lied to, cheated on, suffer pain, grief, loss.
And sometimes, it's really hard to keep that smiling face on. Sometimes, you have to give in, and accept how something makes you feel...
To me, it almost sounds like this poem is saying that in order to be a man, or perfect, you have to be a martyr to other's faults and failings...
Who wants the earth, if, by supressing themselves, they don't have the means of expressing the joy that owns it???
I'll be content with all my emotions, good or bad.

Thats really cool what you just said

I dont really understand what that poem is trying to say but i thought it was in the style of what he wrote.

I don't think you can destroy the self, that is impossible. If anything, you can only destroy and dismantle you current beliefs about the self. And a genuine selfless attitude is what empowers one to really be themselves, because they're not focused on themselves, therefore not focused on trying to be anything and would be best at being themselves when "selfless."

It's better to try and make mistakes than to never try and not know what would have happened. At least, this is a learner's attitude. By no means does it encourage mistakes, but the unwillingness to experience them is exactly what surpressing personal growth.

One thing I hold in reservation about this topic is that being ourselves....a lot of our conceptions about being ourselves is based on what others do in trying to be themselves, or in turn, what they want us to be. It's merely a learned response or attitude. It's natural for us to want harmony, and the basis for self-fulfillment is the same for all humans when it comes to being ourselves. I'm not sure if that it ever came to be that being myself would harm others, would I want to stay that way. this is one of those fallen philosophical debates that never seem to be answered, and are probably better off without answers.

I definitely agree with that sentiment about mistakes...

Was it Einstein who said 'a man who never made a mistake, never made anything?'
Or it might have been my grandfather... A very wise man...such a shame he's no longer with us...

[two cents]

To live is to suffer. This is not to imply that to live is to suffer only pain, or greif, or regret. To live is also to suffer pleasure, and joy, and pride. The suffering from wich one on the path to enlightenment attemts to elliviate is the unending desire of the self to be a certain way. In trying to avoid pain, we collect pleasure, but this is still a suffering, a strife, an effort. To find inner peace is to let go of the self and all the grasping and aversion that comes with it. Continued survival depends on certain allowances.

When hungry, eat your rice, when tired, close your eyes. Fools may laugh
at me, but wise men will know what I mean.
--Lin-Chi [/b]

To loose one's self, to awaken, to become the dreamer -- the Buddha -- is the ultimate goal. This is enlightenment. This is freedom from grasping and aversion. To avoid it is human nature. To desire it is to undermine it. To simply seek it, to follow the middle path between deprivation and gluttony, to move forward without hope of reward or fear of punishment, to simply be, is to be on the path to true enlightenment.

[/two cents]