Define happy for me.

**Howie** · 03-05-2008 01:48 PM

Originally Posted by Stephent91

Howie, it depends on what you call happiness.

Temporary happiness could be bought with money. Giving money to homeless could make you feel good about yourself, and thus you are content and happy. Buying a new game can make you have fun, thus resulting in happiness. The only problem is that it is not permanent. In the end, you will not remember all of the little spurs of happiness that you have every day. You probably won't even remember them for a week. Subjective methods to induce happiness does not result in a sustained euphoric perspective.

Subjective events bring about emotional responses. The emotions that bring a happy feeling cause temporary happiness. Happiness isn't an emotion, but a category of emotions that are all relative to happiness, yet happiness is not constrained by emotions.

Anything subjective that results in happiness is temporary. This means that something objective that creates happiness will result in permanent happiness. This is because it is objective, so it is always there while security, contentment, and enjoyment will not be.

If this is true, then we are always happy for various objective reasons, and sadness is only brought about by subjective, temporary events. If there is a subjective side of happiness, then there must be an objective side though, so we are also always sad.

So we are always in balance, until the subjectivity of reality distributes happiness.

It seems like this post brought me nowhere.

As far as the objective/subjective -that always baffles me. Two things that seem to be opposites in the end look the same.
I can see what you mean though

Although I understand this concept, I do not believe it.
In fact I have recently read a Book by Byron Katie, "Loving what is." This in effect says what you say except that you will ALWAYS be happy.
If this is obtainable then it can certainly go either way. It seems unrealistic.

My point was giving to charity make >you< happy. But if you read the entire post you can see a tier of money makes the amount or money itself worthless.

**StephenT** · 03-05-2008 10:54 PM

Originally Posted by Howie

As far as the objective/subjective -that always baffles me. Two things that seem to be opposites in the end look the same.
I can see what you mean though

Although I understand this concept, I do not believe it.
In fact I have recently read a Book by Byron Katie, "Loving what is." This in effect says what you say except that you will ALWAYS be happy.
If this is obtainable then it can certainly go either way. It seems unrealistic.

My point was giving to charity make >you< happy. But if you read the entire post you can see a tier of money makes the amount or money itself worthless.

That post was me typing a trail of thought.

The end result that I got was that yes, there are objective things that make us happy, and we are always happy because of those... but there are also objective things that make us sad, and we are always sad about those.

So the final bit of objectivity was that it balances out, making that part useless. Although there seems to be a happiness that is relative to the happy person, where they are generally always happy, even for no apparent reason. (Like me!) The objective argument doesn't hold true for me either.

You buy those kinds of books? I always thought that they were 99% worthless.

Yeah, I read the part about money amount. About that, I don't believe that it really even makes you happy. It makes you feel like you have accomplished something or done something good which is a pseudo-happiness. It is material, and won't last. Whether you do give $4 or $4000, it won't bring happiness. Yes, it is good, and it may make the recipient happy for a bit, or make their life easier, which is great, but it doesn't do much for you (which is isn't intended to do!). This argument isn't valid I think because of that.

My final thoughts as of now is that there in nothing to make you completely happy 100% of the time. (Of course.) There are ways to give yourself a pseudo-happiness, which usually involves buying it. There is happiness, which can be brought about many ways, but it can't be forced.

Maybe happiness and sadness is on a scale. We have periods of euphoria and periods of depression which tip the scale either way. Happiness is the ratio of the good/bad, happy/sad, etc. Instead of it being a feeling or a momentary thing, it then becomes a general summary.

**Abra** · 03-07-2008 03:16 AM

True happiness is not an unsatiable lust for more [money, love, social status, etc], but a contentment with what you have.

**Grod** · 03-09-2008 12:52 AM

Originally Posted by Howie

But since happiness can't be defined, apparently, then it is merely subjective. So I can't say money will not buy you ultimate happiness and you cannot say money can always buy happiness.
Yes in most cases money can crate an easier path to achieving happiness. That could be said about a lot of things in life, but it does not make you happy.

I'm with you here, sort of. This brings to mind Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Basically, before you can have self actualization(your perfect job) you need to fulfill all of the other levels of the pyramid. Physiological needs(food, water, etc.) safety love and affection, and need for esteem come before self actualization. This is like the original point of your thread.

Before happiness can come, you have to have the other levels filled out. Which most can be accomplished with money. This is the easiest route to happiness, where you can find your calling and what you were "born to do" - what will make you happy.

Obviously I'm not saying simply grabbing a fistful of bills will give you instant happiness. Working hard and money will make you happy for the most part, but I'll go into that later.

Originally Posted by Howie

When you ask, Why is this happiness? -- who the hell knows. winning makes some people happy and anything falling short of that fails to make them so.
...or so they think.
So I listed a bunch of stuff that details examples that money does not make people happy. You did the same, however your list is an attribution to being happy, not BEING happy.

I don't see how losing would make you happy, but to each his own, I suppose...

Originally Posted by Howie

If these things made you truly happy then they should make you happy at any level.
I have $4 dollars and I gave it to the salvation army. I am happy or am I not happy? I need $400.00 to make up their goal for today. I would be truly happy if I had four million dollars to fund the salvation army.
Do you see what I mean? Any one of your examples is the fallacy really. It is what you or others have eluded yourself to believe would, could and should buy you happiness.

I see what you're saying. Like if I gave a homeless man 5$(I don't give the homeless money btw

would I be happier if I gave him 300$ instead? That's what you're saying, right?

Isn't a little bit enough? Suppose you were feeling a lot of stress approaching taking a huge exam. That 5$ you gave him could relieve part of your stress; and drive you closer towards happiness.

Originally Posted by Howie

How much education would make YOU happy? How many homeless would you have to feed for you to be happy? Ten, fifty, millions, or only all of them!?

As Stephen said, just the little things help. If you(or I) gave a dollar to a homeless man, you might feel content, or maybe a little relieved, like you did your part.

Originally Posted by Howie

I do know where you are coming from grod. For you to ask me if I had won the lottery if that would make me more happy. I can't imagine that anyone would not be more happy (aside from what you and I agree to be an illness, or impossible to obtain) more happy? Happy? or just more.....
Can money can make you happy|PERIOD| You can buy happiness?
~ or more happy?

Yeah, there will always be an exception. I've met people on here that have told me and shown me that money could not get them happiness, like those intangible things you mentioned.

Originally Posted by Howie

The point I had tried to make is the things money cannot buy, not billions of dollars. Nothing.
Do you disagree?

No, I agree with you. There are things that money cannot buy. I think most things that make the majority of people happy can be bought, but yes there are things that money can buy. I liked your example of giving your all to beat an opponent in an even match, and losing. If you just gave them money, it wouldn't be a "fair" match, and you wouldn't feel the satisfaction of evenly winning. Hard work gets you everywhere else, right?

Originally Posted by Howie

Actually Grod, I have an altogether different human analysis on charity, philanthropy, etc.
That is for another day I guess. :smile:

I'm looking forward to it.

**Howie** · 03-09-2008 11:40 AM

Let's just say we are both unhappy.
In an attempt to try to prove money can buy us happiness we will both graciously except $500,000 in donations from the Dream View's members.

This way they feel happy for giving and we can prove or disprove.

$500,000 probably isn't even considered rich.

aaawell, it is a start.

**Grod** · 03-09-2008 04:38 PM

Hahaha. Of course they will be charged if the payment is not prompt in 3 easy installments.

It's all good.

**StephenT** · 03-09-2008 11:11 PM

We need more experiments to prove you both aren't flukes. I'll also take a $500,000.

**Howie** · 03-10-2008 03:23 PM

Originally Posted by Stephent91

We need more experiments to prove you both aren't flukes. I'll also take a $500,000.

If I outright admit I am a fluke, would you still give me anything?

I think that this has some irony to it. Money just as the same thing in everyday life has taken our eye off the ball. Everything revolves around money. If nothing else is proven that certainly has. What would ...I won't even use the word money again in this thread.

I have misworded the entire thread from the beginning. From that I have not seen my question really addressed. Everyone has had great answers and input on exactly what I asked. A definition.

Let's say for the sake of argument that we can all achieve some level of happiness and not try to describe what that is.
Just as some people will always be smarter than you or more athletic than you it only stands to reason that people are generally happier than you.
I think because this is a mentality of sorts that a lot of people feel that everyone can be at a very similar level of happiness.
Is this right?

One of the main reasons I have poses this question in the first place is my examination of several people I know.

Don't we all have people like this in our life? Don't you ever compare yourself to them? Do you wonder where you are as a level of happiness or what you should modestly wish to be?
There are men and woman that happiness seems to come natural to. They can throw judgments to the wind. Each experience is taken in stride, they rebound from tragedies easily and I could go on. Some will say that I or you could achieve this too. Others will say you don't truly know how happy that person is.
Whatever. I have heard all that again and again.
I just want to know what is a realistic goal for me to obtain as far as being happy. I obviously don't expect a direct answer from a post. It's all inquirery, curiosity.
Don't you guys also strive to achieve happiness or more happy or whatever. Or are you content with what is, complacent, pissed off and don't care, So happy you would not wish for more, so high that you really don't give a damn?

**oleander** · 09-28-2008 07:17 PM

Happiness - Not that hard to define really. I have felt all these emotions and it feels like this: Excitement, laughter, euphoric, intangible, infectious, warm, priceless, belly aching, silly and priceless.

When: I have felt it with friends, family, employees. Never planned.

How: I chose to feel that.

Just a thought: Try smiling when you are mad and say in your head "I never did mind the little things."

**Howie** · 09-29-2008 01:44 AM

Originally Posted by oleander

Happiness - Not that hard to define really. I have felt all these emotions and it feels like this: Excitement, laughter, euphoric, intangible, infectious, warm, priceless, belly aching, silly and priceless.

When: I have felt it with friends, family, employees. Never planned.

How: I chose to feel that.

Just a thought: Try smiling when you are mad and say in your head "I never did mind the little things."

Chose?
You don't think that it was a response or product of the environment you were in?

**oleander** · 09-29-2008 02:14 AM

Nope - I chose it. I can honestly say I like to have others feel my happiness. Do you know what happens? You are lost for five ten minutes in nothing. Right down to making out. For those few moments of bliss (hopefully a good kisser) your mind is endless. I believe in what I typed. I wouldn't trade feeling happy for all the money in the world. I like to keep things simple. Sure we could talk environment (Jung) and all that crap. Why? I like those moments and I like to share my smile. When you smile you don't think. You just smile back - and have happy thoughts. You could probably solve world peace with a smile. I think people forgot to just feel.

**Tombe** · 09-29-2008 09:33 AM

being happy is a mood, being in a mood is a way in which you relate to your surroundings and the world. in many ways it's how you view the world.
lot's of people say that when your happy all the colors are brighter, hence if you were sad all you would see is shity things around you.
if you want to know why people get happy, i guess you could say it trace's back to a line of course and effect.

**ClouD** · 09-29-2008 10:16 AM

Does happiness exist aside from a word?

Light-brimming to the top with energy-ecstasy, perhaps?

I can't remember happiness, am I happy now?
Giddy? Excited?

Who is there to be happy?

**really** · 09-29-2008 12:47 PM

And what's if the true happiness cannot be defined? Will you deny the ecstasy while being it - does it not exist?

Not deniable, and if so, that's absolutely ridiculous.

**oleander** · 09-30-2008 12:50 AM

Hi tombe. Yeah i would agree with that statement. Course and effect sure. Would you also agree that your mood effects others? For instance, if I am sad; are you sad? If I am happy; you are happy? I thought a person could chose to be happy or sad. Could you cognitively change your mind?

**EchoSun13** · 09-30-2008 01:15 AM

Happieness in my eyes is when you are feeling good, when everything is good..When nothing can ruin it.

Happyness may seem like a dream to some, but others it is an every day thing.

**ClouD** · 09-30-2008 03:07 AM

Originally Posted by EchoSun13

Happieness in my eyes is when you are feeling good, when everything is good..When nothing can ruin it.

Happyness may seem like a dream to some, but others it is an every day thing.

You spelt happiness in two ways, and didn't get there either time.

< :

**EchoSun13** · 09-30-2008 03:09 AM

I couldn't care less....

Happieness is over rated...Why not try joy..

**ClouD** · 09-30-2008 03:40 AM

Not the same thing, are they?

Call O'nus, we need a semantics eggspurt.

**EchoSun13** · 09-30-2008 03:41 AM

Well no happy and joy arent the same thing..But everyone is "happy"..
Why isn't anyone joyfull?
Happy is boring, how long can one person be happy?
And how long can one be happy...?

**really** · 09-30-2008 06:09 AM

Happy is not boring, being bored is boring.

Being happy is happiness. Joy, smiles, whatever.

**EchoSun13** · 09-30-2008 06:11 AM

Well happy gets boring after awhile for me..I looked at it like.."why am I happy about this..." and I change it could be good or bad...

But I am also quite depressed so my view on feelings is out there...