16 Reasons Why God Never Received Tenure at a University

**InTheMoment** · 11-09-2005 07:14 PM

1. He had only one major publication

2. And it was in Hebrew

3. And it had no references

4. And it was not published in a refereed journal

5. And some even doubt that He wrote it Himself.

6. It may be true that He created the world, but what has He done since then?

7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.

8. The scientific community has had a very rough time trying to replicate His results.

9. He never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to use human subjects.

10. When one experiment went awry, He tried to cover it up by drowning the subjects.

11. When subjects did not behave as predicted, He often punished them, or just deleted them from the sample.

12. He rarely came to class: He just told students to read the book.

13. He had his son teach the class.

14. He expelled His first two students for learning too much.

15. Although there were only ten requirements, most students failed His tests.

16. His office hours were infrequent and usually were held on a mountain top.

**scorpifly** · 11-09-2005 07:27 PM

And his "know-it-all" mentality is somewhat annoying

**kimpossible** · 11-09-2005 07:35 PM

That's awesome!

Originally posted by scorpifly
And his \"know-it-all\" mentality is somewhat annoying

Yeah, but it would have made him fit right in at the universities I attended. . .

**Ex Nine** · 11-09-2005 07:56 PM

I'm going to play Devil's advocate and defend God.

Originally posted by InTheMoment
1. He had only one major publication

2. And it was in Hebrew

It's the most popular book in all humanity. It's been translated into the most languages.

But that doesn't mean it's any good, obviously. Okay, I have truly stopped supporting the Devil now.