LBC forums , its like being in hell but on the interweb

I recently discovered a site called Landover Baptist Church , and it has a public forum here - http://www.landoverbaptist.net/forums/inde...dex.php?act=idx .

So me , being a nonbeliever of God , thought it would be fun to cause some trouble there and throw some science and Physics at them . They created a topic where they claimed that Gravity doesn't exist , and God controls which objects will fly and which shall fall to the earth . They used birds as an example . So i went on to explain to them the theory of flight , and how it all works , but it just wasn't sticking in their brains . They would simply not accept what i had said . In fact anything i said they would say is false , then they would proceed to call me a 'homer' or homosexual repeatedly .

Needless to say , this frustrated the hell out of me . I did some reading up and apparently that site is actually a parody , or a play on religion according to wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Landover_..._Baptist_Church, but the members of the forums seem like they are actual fundamentalist christian , but they have such extreme views it is just astounding . Its almost like they've been brainwashed and reprogrammed by a godfearing person . Now even if they are just putting on an act , they do it so well that one would be led to believe that they actually have those views .

So , im sending a call to all atheists and nonbelievers to back me up on that website , because we need your help to pound some sense into these zombies minds . They have been brainwashed and their minds need to be freed so join me .

Anyway , if there are some christians or believers here who are reading this , i in no way set out to attack you , or your religion , infact officially im still a christian , just that i never accepted what the bible said to be true cos i knew all along that it was just stories . I just had that gut instinct . But if you still dislike me for making this thread maybe you should pop into that forum and just say one thing and prepare to be flamed from hell and lucifer himself , because if there is a devil he is present on that forum .

I think that the Landover Baptist Church is supposed to be a joke. Come on, man. None of that stuff could possibly be real. It's definately a joke.

http://www.landoverbaptist.org/

Go to their main site (See link ^). Then tell me (with a straight face) that you believe they're really serious.

What I saw looked serious. I live in America's "Bible Belt", and I know first hand that there are plenty of people out there who think like that. Is that church supposed to be in Mississippi or Alabama? I think I might get their take on my theory about God's penis up their asses.

EDIT: Okay, I read the posts. When I left the post I am now editing, I had only read the topic titles. I now think it is a joke, but one where they are ready to jump on other people who post. I can't wait. This is going to be a riot. I will be posting under the name "Jesassgasm".

EDIT #2: They won't let me register! :?: I fill out the registration page and hit the necessary button, and then I just go to some page that tells me I can't read the shout box and am not logged in, and I have no email from them.

LMFAO Universal, that is the BEST DAMN NAME I've ever heard.

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Originally posted by Tsen
LMFAO Universal, that is the BEST DAMN NAME I've ever heard.

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Thanks. I hope any possible members of the fundamentalist community will like it too.

I tried five times to register, and it wouldn't let me. But I went to the live chat room and left some food for thought. Nobody else was there. I don't know why it won't let me register. I tried other names and made sure I filled out everything. :?

I think you cant register because of ur email , i used www.Shinyfeet.com , just so i could post there . That email seems to work .

Anyway , probably the second or third day i was on that forum i realised they were just joking , but as i continued to post they didnt let up , like they actually do believe in that stuff . They are as stubborn as mules and blind as a mole . You cant each them anything , its just in one ear and out the other . But nevertheless , i still go there and try to convince these fake Christians that they're full of crap . But its hard , theyre very strong and stubborn , they just throw endless bible versus at you , expecting you to "see the light , and become a TRUE CHRISTIAN®" as they call it .

And watch out , they'll ask you to start something they call "titheing" , basically for you to goto heaven you have to send them atleast 10% of your earnings . I asked them if i earned $.1 if i could send them $ .01 and goto heaven but they just called me a homer . Thats there standard response - "you homeristic sissy , your Hellbound" or "When lucifer is raping you i will be laughing" . Its actuallyy quite funny .

Anyway , i hope some of you make it in there and run amuck . :wink:

I like the way those guys think.

Hey guys , i saw some of your comments on the LBC forum today , real nice work to Rahulol and Niko , but i was a bit dissapointed you lasted only 6 posts but atleast you made the most of them . I think youve riled them up a bit so good work there .

I myself take a less full on approach and prefer to contaminate their subconcious mind subliminally by feeding them evil thing such as science and logic , and maybe some of them will see the light someday . Though its a challenge , i almost got banned yesterday for saying how rediculous they all are , but when they threatened to ban me i thought id better cool it so i can contaminte their minds some more .

I liked the thing you said that got u banned -
'Don't you find it odd that two heathens such as myself and Niko would show up here at the same time? If I had to guess, I'd say that we're probably soldies of Satan sent here to destroy you all, but y'know... thats just a guess'

But it really is like bashing your head against a brick wall with those crazy Christians .

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Originally posted by Darkmatic+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Darkmatic)</div>

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I liked the thing you said that got u banned -
'Don't you find it odd that two heathens such as myself and Niko would show up here at the same time? If I had to guess, I'd say that we're probably soldies of Satan sent here to destroy you all, but y'know... thats just a guess' [/b]

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:rolllaugh:

<!--QuoteBegin-Darkmatic
But it really is like bashing your head against a brick wall with those crazy Christians .

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Yep, so true... :shakehead2:

They have a banner that says "un$aved not welcome."

What does the $ mean? Do I have to donate money to be saved?

lol what a sick shit.

I can't register eighter btw. Don't know why.

Those people are crazy. They really are a bunch of fags. They are fucking Evil. Not even muslims are THIS crazy.

Lmao!! I have to get that bumper sticker on the ad of the main site...

"Who would Jesus Bomb?"

I might get that Christian thong for my girl too. The holy Bible gun camp doesn't sound bad though....

"Accept Jesus and get a New PS 2!!"-Ad.

LOL! I just had to bump this... Here is a quote from the forums on "How to tell if you're child is GOTH"

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-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this.
-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe
this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be
stopped immediately.)
-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media
sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may
watch.)
-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.
-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.
-Masturbates
[/b]

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http://www.landoverbaptist.net/forums/inde...topic=5680&st=0

These guys have to be joking... masturbates? cable? computer? Role-playing games? drinking BLOOD? COUNT DRACULA!?!?!?

Almost every teenager masturbates, uses the computer, watches TV, plays video games, and eats breakfast...



EDIT: HAHAH! On that thread, I'm about to post a photoshopped image of me with an energy-sphere-like thing!

EDIT2: I MESSED UP AND THAT DAMN GUY INSULTED ME!!! GAH!

I was banned... they really need to know what they are doing before they hurt someone...

I thought it was just a sick joke... but... now.... I can't believe this... They have twisted God's words around...

Anyone can see God as long as they have faith...