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    1. #1
      Member Bruho's Avatar
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      Seinfeld Standup

      JERRY: I swear, I have absolutely no idea what women are thinking. I don't get it, OK? I, I, I admit, I, I'm not getting the signals. I am not getting it! Women, they're so subtle, their little...everything they do is subtle...men are not subtle, we are obvious. Women know what men want, men know what men want, what do we want? We want women, that's it!...It's the only thing we know for sure, it really is: we want women. How do we get them? Oh, we don't know 'bout that, we don't know. The next step after that we have no idea. This is why you see men honking car-horns, yelling from construction sites. These are the best ideas we've had so far...The car-horn-honk, is that a beauty? Have you seen men doing this? What is this? The man is in the car, the woman walks by the front of the car, he honks: [imitates horn]

      e-eeehh, eehhh, eehhh, this man is out of ideas. How does it...? [imitates horn again] e-e-e-eeeehhhh, "I don't think she likes me"...The amazing thing is, that we still get women, don't we. Men, I mean, men are with women. You see men with women. How are men getting women, many people wonder. Let me tell you a little bit about our organization. "Where ever women are?", we have a man working on the situation right now. Now, he may not be our best man, OK, we have a lot of areas to cover, but someone from our staff is on the scene...That's why, I think, men get frustrated, when we see women reading articles, like: "Where to meet men?". We're here, we are everywhere. We're honking our horns to serve you better.

    2. #2
      Member Bruho's Avatar
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      I find this to be very true... we have ran out of ideas. I had a grand idea at school today, put your # and "Say baby, you wanna lay down with me?" on a piece of paper and shoot it with a rubberband at babes.

    3. #3
      Member bradybaker's Avatar
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      "Let me ask you this question in regards to the skydiving....what is the point of the helmet, in the skydiving? I mean, can you kinda make it? You jump outta that plane and that shute doesn't open, the helmet is now wearing you for protection.

      Later on, the helmet is talking with the other helmets going, "It's a good thing he was there or I would've hit the ground directly."

      There are many things we could point to as proof that the human being is not smart, the helmet is my personal favorite. The fact that we had to invent the helmet...now why did we invent the helmet? Well, because we were participating in many activities that were cracking out heads. We looked at the situation, we chose not to avoid these activities, but to just make little plastic hats so that we can continue our headcrackin' lifestyles."

      I love Seinfeld's standup....funny, funny stuff.
      "This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time."



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