Thread: Make your own prayer

Spam is Shiny Spam is Bright

It Shines with Everlasting Light

I Wish I May I Wish I Might

Have a Spork of Spam Tonight

The mods are such fucks -_-. I was hoping christians would feel comfortable putting their prayers in. It wasn't supposed to be a fucking joke thread. It was supposed to be a fucking olive branch.

God is real awesome
He is not a total bum
Thank you God oh Lord Almighty
For accepting prayers that don't rhyme

Mighty mosquito in my table
May your omnipotence make you able
To dodge this incredible swipe
That would grant me your blood like that jesus guy
Oh mosquito across the sky
Make my atheist father to comply
To your religion that has taught me
That rather a mosquito than freaking a bee
If you see me sin just look away
Cause I saw you reading 50 shades of grey
Give strength against my psychiatrist
That big idiot that says that you don't exist
In the night I pray to the mosquito lord
Cause an anti-insect spray I can't afford
Now that I'm done with this prayer to y'all
Back to work while my god is crushed into the wall.

Originally Posted by Original Poster

The mods are such fucks -_-. I was hoping christians would feel comfortable putting their prayers in. It wasn't supposed to be a fucking joke thread. It was supposed to be a fucking olive branch.

I thought the religion subforum was unmoderated, and that was the point? I'd bring up your case and try to get it moved back.

Here is my prayer:

Reality, continue dancing forward,
your laws immutable,
as they transform you,
and I within you.

Let me forever learn,
so that I may become closer to you,
and see truth as beauty.

Amen.

As I lay me down to sleep
I pray to the Lord other days like this one to keep
And should I become crazy before I wake
I will pray to the Lord to bake me a cake.

You know I could really use some comfort food right now, perhaps I won't wait until I am crazy after all (assuming it has not happened already, which is in doubt), and I will work on the premise that God is even more likely to help us if we help ourselves.

Thank you Lord, for seeing Adam through this last illness. I know... I'm selfish in wanting him here with me, and one day You'll take him Home before its my time to rejoin him there. Thank you for giving us each other, and for keeping us safe through everything thats happened. Thank you for the income and the job that is coming soon. Love, Carolyn.

More of a poem than a prayer, but I'll run with it.


When you wish upon a star,
The act itself is quite bizarre.
Isn't there some strange delusion,
In praying to a ball of fusion?
Do you seriously expect a reply,
From that glowing dot up in the sky?
If you do, I think you're crazy,
But here's my number, so call me maybe.
Though stars are big and kinda pretty,
Their wish granting powers are really shitty.
So abandon faith in this foolish myth,
And put your trust in the Sith.

Originally Posted by Abra

I thought the religion subforum was unmoderated, and that was the point? I'd bring up your case and try to get it moved back.

It actually follows the same rules as the rest of the forum.


A Mod's Prayer

I pray each night for wisdom's light
Though I'm often in the dark
I know what's wrong and I know what's right
Though my detractors are quite stark

"You're a Nazi!", "You're an ass!"
And all of you mods suck
I do my best, I try real hard
But I don't get paid a buck.

So if you're reading this right now
Please try and understand
I just want to have good dreams
And offer some a hand.

I pray today for peace on Earth
And kindness on DreamViews
It would be nice to have a day
Without any "Fuck you's!"

Alas I know it just won't be
Every day I see new tricks
Some people post some odd ideas
And others call them dicks.

I do not pray for holding hands
And singing happy songs
I merely hope we all can post
And simply get along.