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The 9 Most Badass Bible Verses
Aah, this is great. I didn't place it into R/S since...well, I doubt it makes room for debate, just some humour...plenty of humour, really. I'm still laughing. >.<
Every year in Israel, divine-bear attacks kill over 500 children.
:rolllaugh:
Note: Child death isn't funny. Child death that never happened and would never happen under hilarious circumstances is.
"God listened carefully to their complaints, weighed their points, then made the earth eat them alive. The text does not make it clear whether or not the earth made that "OM NOM NOM" sound, so scholars are forced to speculate."
LOL
This is fucking awesome. Great link.
http://cdn-www.cracked.com/articleim...g/badass5b.jpg
Such pornographic filth should be BANNED!!!! :mad: At least that's what the Baptists keep telling me.
Hahahah, it's like Marvel Comics from two millenia ago. :lol:Quote:
There was also Anath in Judges 3:31, who "struck down six hundred philistines with an oxgoad." An oxgoad is a sharp stick you used to poke oxen. That started the Israeli tradition of killing large numbers of their enemies with farmyard tools, which continued through Samson and onto modern times, where the Six Day War of 1967 was won by a crippled Israeli peasant wielding a watering can.
Either way, the Philistines almost certainly remembered Samson as the worst thing that ever happened to them.
I got a chuckle out of it. However, they left out one of my favorite stories. I don't remember the names of the parties involved, but essentially what it boiled down to was:
Bad guy represses people.
Bad guy finds himself in trouble.
Bad guy hides in tent of woman (of people he repressed).
Bad guy falls asleep.
Woman takes a spike and places it to bad guy's temple.
Woman nails man's head to floor.
Bad guy dies.
And people say the Bible's boring...
Holy crapper of DOOM that is hilariousness incarnate...
I LOVE Cracked.com. It's freaking awesome :)
:D This is hilarious!
I saw those statues while on vacation in Egypt.
lol
I couldn`t finish it because it`s not a good place to laugh hysterically right now (the bears did me in)...
That was awesome. There is no other word to describe it than biblically awesome.
before i stopped believing in god i've read most of these but how you say them is :laugh:
"What did Saul (the king at the time) want with 100 foreskins? Was he going to make a scarf?"
haha, truly.
I agree. That must hurt.
Just goes to show how hillarious the Bible is!