Suicidal thoughts

Latly ive been having serious thoughts of suicide for no reason. just last night i was writing a theory about the unexcapable paradox and for no apaerant reason i started playing with my pocket knife, twirling it and making stab motions simply out of boredom. Then out of nowhere my perspective on the whole situition fliped, i could feel it, my breathing got heavy, i grasped the knife real tight and closed my eyes to invision myself taking my life and feeling as though im on the brink of loosing control. These intense emotions have been following like a shadow and if my mind strays for a few moments they take hold. a few days ago it was accompanied by phosphene imagry of some sort, sort of like when one meditates. now it wouldnt be bothering me that much but last night when i went to sleep i had this dream that i was attempting to destroy myself, outside of myself, and when i did i felt a feeling of satisfaction and great joy, insanely great. I was screaming "YES YES, YOU BASTARD!!! HOW DO YA' LIKE THAT SHIT!!! AHHHH HAHAHA" then the dream replayed. anyone have some insight/comments/suggestions?

-Peace.

Well as my very trustworthy friend always says, "Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem". That applies to someone who has a problem... if you are just having random visions of suicide for no reason, then maybe theres more involved. Ive always thought of suicide as a way of getting back at the people who made your life miserable, but then in the end, youre the one who gets the most punishment. Loss of existence... its really scary to think that one day you will cease to exist but the world will continue on as it always has. Unless of course that there is in fact, an afterlife (not quite sure if there is.... hrm). When holding a knife, one time in ones life, they have thought how easy it would be to thrust it into their heart. Some view this as a sefety issue, like they could trip and die, and others view this as a eject button thats so easy to pull. Thats just the way some people think, though you may think somewhat differently. I dunno... alls i know is that i will never suidide up myself.

Sorry for the long article, i think a long post deserves a long reply.

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Originally posted by p00p
Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem

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I agree with p00p.

I don't think there's anything in existance that would warrant the need to take one's own life. Up until the moment that you die there is still hope that life will improve and things will get better. Those that commit suicide don't see that and end up causing grief to those left behind. I myself had suicidal thoughts from time to time, but luckily I have family and friends to keep me going. Don't think that hope is lost. It isn't.

If you're just thinking on suicide but have no real inclination to go through with it, I'd say limit those thoughts as much as possible. Find other things to occupy your mind or your view on the subject may change itself into something undesirable.

Sorry for the motherly words, but I've known ppl who've committed suicide and I take it very seriously.

-Amé

I was thinking that maybe winter light deprivation could cause a small depression, could be the cause. whatever the matter, i do NOT have any intent of suicide, but the menacing memonts are often frieghtning. thank you for your insight.
Peace.

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Originally posted by Amethyst Star+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Amethyst Star)</div>

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<!--QuoteBegin-p00p

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Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem

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I agree with p00p.[/b]

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I second that motion sire, and dare I say it, it's an excellent thing to quote! Jove. By. Hollyhock.

"Can they hear us calling,
calling them, from those rooms
where they've gone to be alone
for all time, alone in suicide,
which is deeper than death,
and where we can never find the pieces
to put them back together."

My own view is, whatever you believe, suicide will not leave you in a better position, and wherever you end up will be much harder to escape.

I rarely ever have impulses like those, though I have had them many a time. Last few times what I did was just recite Hamlet's "To be or not to be" soliloquy(which I know by heart) and it seems to help clear my mind a bit. It is a most excellent arguement and the way in which it is written and thought out is truly perfect....