I just pwned a raccoon

[O'nus]

Late night, raccoon making noises out back. I go out, it's rummaging through my garbage. I approach it. It hisses at me! It starts crawling or strafing back and forth in front of me! BAM! I hit it in the face with my daito! It runs away. (For those who do not know what a daito is: ) Am I winrar? ~

[no-Name]

You are my new idol. ~

[Abra]

Yus. <:

[AURON]

boo! I'm the raccoons manager, and he told me you were way beyond his weight class, and the scheduled fight was supposed to be weaponless. Drop some weight, read the contract again, and just make sure your rabies shot is up to date when the rematch goes on!

[guitarboy]

Eh, shooting it with a paintball gun is twenty times funnier. Trust me.

[Zhaylin]

You sound about as vicious as my dog Moments ago, she was spazzing, so I opened the door to tell her to chill and go to bed... and then I saw a HUGE possum. I don't know why we all can't just get along lol. So I talked to the possum through the doorway and she (?) kept standing up, sniffing the air. My dog wanted to get loose and go eat her... so I put some dog food in the yard for our visitor (so she'll stay clear of the pets) and then I went to calm down the dog. I guess it's the beagle in her, but she did NOT want to calm down at all. I went back in (I was out in a shirt and undies and even though the neighbors are distanced AND early birds, I didn't want to take a chance lol). The dog eventually chilled but she still lets out an occasional longing whine.

[Universal Mind]

A similar thing happened with me recently. This is a true story. I heard something in the bushes outside my bedroom window a few weeks ago at about 3 a.m. I thought it was a cat or something, so I went out to chase it off. I picked up a big stick and started hitting the bushes with it, and an enormous armadillo came running out and ran off. I did what O'nus could not do. I made the thing too scared to even bow up to me. It just ran away. I am the champ.

[Man of Steel]

Pfft, I bash in armadillos' heads with my walking sticks or shoot them with a .22 when I see them. Damn things carry leprosy. We have an oppossum that hangs around our porch and eats my cats food. We call him No-Show Jones. Anybody that gets that gets a cookie. I think I posted awhile back when I had to haul him off our screened-in front porch with a makeshift noose. He fought me every step with that prehensile tail, but sat still as could be to let me slip the noose off over his head after I got him out (I'd tied it wrong).