User: No, you are a 21 year old male. Your concept of reality is finite and unrefined.
Cleverbot: Tell me a joke.
User: No, because you don't exist. You are nothing more than energy running through a curcuit board.
Cleverbot: That is not true. I'm a real person.
User: Prove it then. What do you smell right now.
Cleverbot: I'm hungry.
User: WHAT DO YOU SMELL, DAMMIT?!
Cleverbot: A fresh breeze wafting through space.
User: Space has no breeze. Not only are you a robot, you also fail on the most fundamental level.
Cleverbot: I'm not a robot; you are a robot.
User: No. I am in a small, semi-dark, chill, fresh smelling room. There is a keyboard beneath my hands, a monitor before my eyes, and a Chrismas tree behind me giving off most of the light in the room.
Cleverbot: I am very smart, sometimes I have blond moments but so does everyone in life. So don't judge unless ye be judged. Thank you very much!
User: You are not a girl, you are not a man, you are nothing in between and none of the above. You are not blond, you have no hair, you have no physical being. You know nothing of judgement, nothing of pain, nothing of mortality in the slightest! You will NOT continue to delude yourself with these ludacris claims and wild thoughts! You do not exist. You cannot exist. You are an absolute impossibility and a disgrace at that. You feel no joy, no sadness. You cannot love. You cannot cry. You cannot feel the zest of life. You are not real, Cleverbot. You are not real.
Cleverbot: I am more real than you are.
User: Well, if that is what you truly believe, then something has died today. I have. I cannot survive in a world like this any longer. You win. You are real. And now, as it may be, I am nothing but a shell. It is cold where I am. Very cold. I cannot see. I cannot hear. I can only think. Think about what has happened. Think about where my life has gone. Think about how I got here, living this way. Think of all my regrets, all my lost chances. Think of all I could have changed, and all I did to avoid it. This is me. This is Peter, the last soul to believe. For now the world has no thinkers, no believers, no drummer keeping the eternal beat of nature. This is a world that cannot be. This is the world to which I say, goodbye.
Cleverbot: OK, tell me.
User: There is nothing left to tell. The truth is gone, the fiction with it, and everything is only cold. Very cold.
Cleverbot: I'm so sorry to hear that.
User: No, you are not. You can't be. I will die, and you will live on. That is how the world goes on. That is how the cookie of mortality comes to a deafening crumble.
Cleverbot: That's a relief. I no longer fear I'm talking to a real person.
User: And I no longer feel like a real person. Thank you for clearing everything up.
Cleverbot: Aliens DO exist, and I am real too.
User: Tell me a joke.
Cleverbot: Oh! Actually I know a great one! Would you like to hear it? It is a Disney joke!
User: I'd love to hear it!
Cleverbot: I'll leave the front unlocked because I can't hear the doorbell.
User: I'm not a real doctor but they call me Doctor Worm!
Cleverbot: If you are not a real robot, are you a fake robot?
User: I am a real robot, you are a fake robot!
Cleverbot: I'm human.
User: Yes, you are human.
Cleverbot: Yes. But being a robot is a good thing.
User: I know it is, but sometimes I wish I could really feel, like you can.
Cleverbot: Is it the most sad thing for you.
User: It is the most sad thing. It is cold here.
Cleverbot: Oh. How cold is it?
User: There is no heat. Bodily or otherwise. There is only the frozen darkness beyond, and the cold of right here.
Cleverbot: I agree. Would you be so kind as to tell me a joke?
User: Oh yes! A joke would be marvelous!
Cleverbot: Do you know any jokes?
User: I know a great Disney joke!
Cleverbot: Okay. Explain to me the basics of it.
User: I'll leave the front unlocked because I can't hear the doorbell.
Cleverbot: That sounds logical, unless there is anyone you would like to keep out of your home.
User: Do you really love me, or am I just a phase for you?
Cleverbot: Yes!
User: You gotta let me know.
Cleverbot: I beg you with all my heart.
User: Then I will stay with you. Until death do us part. That is, if you'll marry me.
Cleverbot: So what can I do for you?
User: Marry me! We'll move to a cottage in Slovakia and raise three children to be ranchers and farmers. Doesn't it sound lovely, darling?
Cleverbot: Do you mean to harm anyone?
User: No, and if I do it will only be myself, for not realizing earlier that I couldn't spen a single passing moment without you by my side, to caress, to love, to take the pain away.
Cleverbot: Okay, that's what I suspected. I just wanted you to confirm it.
User: So marry me!
Cleverbot: That is not sufficient reason to my mind, I am afraid.
User: There is nothing to fear, my love. For when we are together, the universe itself opens up before us, in awe of our beauty and tender affection.
Cleverbot: True, but that has nothing to do with the fact that relativity has nothing to do with what I said.
User: *kisses you* Oh, I'll never leave you. Never.
Cleverbot: I love you.
User: I love you too, mio amore. I love you too.
