Insomnia kills my dream recall because once I finally do get to sleep, I am too shot to remember any dreams the next time I wake up. As oppose dto if I sleep normally I wake up from a dream, think of it, write it, go back to sleep.
I hate insomnia and none of the advice about emptying your mind works for me. Nothing works. I feel very hopeless and in despair about my insomnia. I can see why so many people drink and drug themselves to sleep but I don't want to go that route.
Insomnia can be such terrible suffering on nights like tonight and so can forgetting dreams
I would say acceptance would be my answer for now. I have no other choice but to accept that I am unable to sleep and that my dream life and dream recall are suffering. And so then if I accept that, no technique, no tricks, no meditation, no life style change, is going to make any difference, I am just stuck with insomnia no matter what I do. I can't resist the insomnia. I can't fight the insomnia. I just have to accept the insomnia.
I have to accept the bags under my eyes. I have to accept that I feel like crap. I have to accept the frustration. I have to accept that I hate my life. I have to accept that dreaming and lucid dreaming is like the most important thing to me but I am being deprived of it for no good reason whatsoever.
If I look at insomnia in a more positive light it makes me reach out to others and try to get help. It forces me out of isolation. Maybe a big reason for my insomnia might be emotional isolation and unmet emotional needs. Like when a baby cries throughout the night to see if there parent is there for them. Especially if the parent gets sick of it it teaches the baby that no one cares which isn't the right message.
The night is one of those times it amplifies the emotional experience that no one is there for the insomnia sufferer. So I guess it is a part of them which is drawing attention to that experience of no one being there. When I have insomnia, I imagine every other person in the world is sound asleep when in fact insomnia is very common. Its the mental chatter and the wi fi and the over stimulation by synethtic technology and light and the stimulants and the IBS and the crappy processed food. And the artificial stress from school and work which are artificial constructs anyway. Money is an artificial construct anyway. Lots of social stress is all an artificial construct anyway. But it keeps me from sleeping all the same.
So sometimes wen I have insomnia I have to just accept it, like now, and go on an insomnia forum like this. But I wouldn't glorify insomnia like some of these TV programs. I don't think insomnia is something to be celebrated and I think some people take it too far, almost using insomnia as an excuse to stay up on purpose, when really they could sleep. Like right now, there is no way I could sleep. So I am up. but, I wouldn't be like, "WOO HOO! INSOMNIA! LETS BINGE ON CAT VIDEOS AND HAVE A CUP OF COFFEE!!!"
Another thing about insomnia is that it has an effect where if you are up in the middle of the night, with less going on, it gives you a chance to think through things that you can't think through effectively during the day. The day is too busy with too many demands. So it might leave too much day residue that isn't done being worked out. So the insomnia is like your survival mechanism being like, okay, here is the middle of the night when you can actually put your undivided attention on an issue. Let's make you be awake so you have to deal with it.
Unfortunately I can't seem to really do any constructive thinking when I am sleep deprived. So it is a faulty survival mechanism. Why are our survival instrincts going astray and haywaire? It has a lot to do with the technocratic and industrial complexes many mistakes at trying to control every aspect of life. It is much more a collective problem than an individual problem. Its almost like the world tries to set us up for insomnia with all the synthetic stimuli during the day and then sell us sleep pills to sleep at night, making money off us at both ends.
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