WILD attempt feels like raging river

So, to WILD I kinda follow BillyBob's breathing method. But I turn on metronome on my phone and make it count 150 beats, because I am hving hard time focusing. Then it stops and I continue on my own. Then white light appears. And this might sound ridiculous, but then I kinda grab it and I mustn't let go, otherwise I will lose it. It feels like swimming opposite of raging river flow. Then I start breathing differently and counting automatically. I've experienced paralysis for the first time, but it wasn't full paralysis, just my hand and legs, but they felt incredibly heavy xD So how do I win against that raging river and become lucid? Any advice? Until now, I have only managed to hold it and not let go. I've tried sivason's technique, to lay on side in my usual sleeping position, but that just woke me up. So I need something else.