Dreams of failure

:( I was diagnosed 8 yr. ago with bipolar, & took all the appropriate drugs, although they never seemed to help much. Finally I connected with an excellent pdoc who diagnosed me as having toxic anger syndrome. I have since come, mostly, to grips with my anger issues & have stopped bottling up my frustrations & anger, & learned to express my emotions in a more appropriate manner. I have gained a measure of self-esteem, something I have never had before, & I have much more faith in myself. However, I have recently been having very disturbing dreams. I find myself in situations where I have committed the same embarrassing behavior that I displayed in the past - losing my temper over unimportant incidents, being laughed at for inappropriate responses to situations, & generally losing all my hard-won self-esteem. I find these dreams very disturbing, as they are displaying a part of me that I feel no longer exists. I have not yet been able to remember my dreams with any great detail, it takes me such a long time to fall asleep that it is hard to keep telling myself that I must remember my dreams for such an extended period of time. However, I continue to try! In the meantime, I would like to know why I am having this dream of failure at a point in my life when I feel I am doing so much better. For the first time in 8 years, I am working, making new friends, initiating conversations & generally being much more outgoing than I ever have in my entire 57 years of existence! Any ideas?

I wouldn't get too upset about these dreams if they aren't affecting your life too badly. It time for the back to school dreams (3 dreams about the first day of school in the past week) and all of them are about me being late for classes and getting in trouble. I am a straight A student in real life, never get in trouble, and am never late for classes. I act so weird in these dreams and not like I would in real life. I probably act like this because I'm afraid that someday I will be late and I dream about it. Maybe for you it is the same in that you have finally got your life in order and are afraid that you will slip to your old ways that you hate. I would just continue with your life and keep making it better.

well dreams show our preoccupations. You are working hard at controlling your behavior and that comes across in these dreams. You are reminding yourself just how bad things used to be and how you have to keep working at this

Think of it this way. The very religious have dreams about being sinners who should be punised. The dreams do not show an objective reality instead they show us what our concerns and preoccupations are

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The father of modern dream interpretation is not Freud or Jung but rather Jon Winson. But he never made a single dream interpretation. Instead he conducted research into the mind and established that certain brainwaves (theta waves) only appear during the night time. During the day we store up all new experiences and feelings in short term memory. Then at night we start to work through what happened the previous day and we integrate these into long term memory blocks. Then finally we clear short term memory blocks ready to start the process again the next day. Its likely that any dreams we have are linked to these brain functions. The weird images and feelings once deciphered capture our own feelings and new insights into the world around us. So the dreams then will often link to specific events from the day before and to new ways in which our world has been reshaped. It may simply link to our paranoias and fantasies. If we are focused on something about to happen in the near future then the dreams may link to that. Each dream captures one specific feeling or thought process.
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I think that personally you should just take it easy, try not to let your worries bother you, clear your mind, and i know whilst saying this now that its easier said than done, maybe you could try laying down on your couch and just concentrate on your breathing, get into a tempo and repeat these words "i am relaxed, calm and collective" and truly mean it when repeating them. The problem you seem to be having is that you are worrying alot and these dominating thoughts of worry are showing up in your dreams, don't be worried about what the dreams are, you may have had something embarassing happen in the dream but at the end of the day it was a dream, it wasn't real.

You should try and not let worries bother you by trying to keep your mind clear and positive. Don't worry about what happened in your dream, analyse it and see what it shows. Say you killed someone in your dream and you felt really angry in the dream, this could show that you carry alot of anger in your thoughts throughout the day, just stay calm and analyse these thoughts, a good idea is to clear your mind before sleep and this will push away these dominating thoughts and worries thus hopefully giving you a nice restful night of sleep. Even by clearing your mind and pushing in positive thoughts can give you some pleasant dreams which may even boost your confidence.

I hope things become clearer as you tackle this obstacle in life.

Best of luck to you! :)

:)Thank you all for your kind words & good ideas. I now feel less disturbed by my dreams & will not dwell on them so much!