The past two nights have yielded interesting dreams, more or less likely due to the fact that I've begun to sleep earlier and get better sleep. The dream I had the night before last I'll keep to myself. Do you ever experience those unique modes of existence in some other dimension that it almost feels better to keep it secret? Like a treasured piece of information. It was on that night, I'm pretty sure, that I had written in my journal that I am alone, and that you are alone, and that everyone is alone, and there was something in that idea that made me really happy. I was listening to music in the dark and dancing by myself, writing down one liners and short paragraphs whenever I felt the inspiration come. It's good to have something that only you are aware of. At least, that's the way I feel, comfortable in my by-myself-ness. And at the same time no person is truly alone. Everything is connected, and every one thing influences every other thing. But those private thoughts and feelings.. They can be pleasant in their own way. And they are.
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The second dream, the one from last night, was a different story. It was another one of those that coalesced into a nightmare setting over time. Nothing changes physically, and even with a brilliant sun above I began to feel like I was sharing the space with another mind. After running into my fair share of foul mouthed, negative people (some crazy, it seemed) I ended up in a room walled with old wooden panels and linoleum floors. There was a desk of darkened wood close to a window on the far end, and on that sat a clock with multiple displays for rows of digits that shone in red. It was upon messing with the digital clock that the other presence began to enter, and the clock displays all buzzed with 8's that vibrated briefly as if to deny my attempt to alter the settings. I tried again, and the fully lit digits buzzed as before. The presence grew stronger. I thought to myself that I might be dreaming due to the odd behaviour of the clock, and immediately thought back in response that the idea was ridiculous. This place was real. Nevertheless I plugged my nose and was able to breathe effortlessly. I was in shock.
The presence remained, as happens to be the case in this particular brand of dream. I knew I wanted to be on my way, and again hadn't had the benefit of experiencing a vivid lucid in a while. Bad sleep does that, you know. So I flew through the glass window like a ghost and over the town that bore a strong semblance to London, England. At around two hundreds yards from the fifth story that I flew from, I began to feel the other mind work against me as I slowed in midair and got dragged back towards the room. Alarms were screaming in my head. I decided to work with the force and flew right back through the building to the other side, but the other entity that remained invisible to me (and all around me) was going to tug me right back. I focused as best I could and tried to "fall sideways" through the air, as opposed to regular flying. I was tumbling erratically and had little sense of which way was up and down for a while, but I knew that I was getting progressively further from whatever haunted that tower (or this entire world). As my orientation in the air stabilized I remained in a southward drift. I was over the ocean now, and dotted below me were hundreds of islands with large stone battlements and fortifications being fired upon by large, modern warships. I could hear the thunder of the cannons and rat-tat-tat of the shore guns firing back. The vividness of the naval battle was striking. This world was torn in war and reeked of negativity.
I kept adrift for awhile.
After waking I was still aware of the other mind watching my own. I was aware of it, and it of me.
It's puzzling. Does the presence exist as a fragmented part of my own mind, or do I unintentionally walk into other worlds with their own slew of dark deities? The "other" in these kinds of dreams do have a locality in that they exist in a part of the space and not all of it, but they also occupy a lot of the space at the location they exist at. This means that if one is to approach me and get close enough, it surrounds me and feels very much as if it's looking at me from all sides.