Why am I so afraid? A beginner's views.

First off, I have introduced myself on this site a while back when I had a much stronger desire to lucid dream. Since then, I found it difficult to stay motivated, tried to convince myself that I would never have an LD, then read up on people's scary lucid experiences to further forget about even attempting it.

Believe me when I say that I would like to experience lucid dreaming. I have never had one before, but I've read enough to know that the benefits outweigh the cons. I feel like I'm letting something as powerful as lucid dreaming go to waste just because of my irrational fears. I know that you cannot be harmed in a lucid dream. I used to make it a routine to follow standard DILD methods such as affirmations and reality checks, but I never stuck with it long enough to see results. I think I just got tired of it and doubted my ability for success.

More specifically, I pursued DILD because of my fear of any SP associated with WILD. Again, I let any scary experiences that I've read persuade me to avoid WILDing. Furthermore, I think DILD fits my style more and would be happy to bring the habits into my day to increase my waking awareness so it will carry over into my dreams.

Overall, I have strayed away from lucid dreaming simply because I am afraid of the unknown, and I have always been that way. I tend to think negatively of new experiences, no matter what they may be.

A few questions: Can you experience SP somehow after you awake from a DILD, or is that very unlikely? (this is a stupid question because I'm aware that SP is something that is normal, safe, and our bodies go through it every night but we're not aware of it)

Secondly, are scary dream experiences going to be brought on by lucid dreaming? Because if I'm not lucid and I have a scary dream, then it's just a normal nightmare. But if I am lucid in a dream and something scary comes about, shouldn't I be calm and rational and understand that I am the one in control and that I cannot be harmed?

Why is it that I feel like I should avoid lucid dreaming just because I have let my fears get the better of me?

I really don't want to waste more experienced lucid dreamers' time with my own problems, but I just wondered if anyone here has ever felt even a single bit like me. Thank you all so much!

I never had SP.

It may only occur (but doesn't happen in most occasions) with a WILD. With a DILD, you don't go through the process of falling asleep while in a conscious state of mind.

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I used to make it a routine to follow standard DILD methods such as affirmations and reality checks, but I never stuck with it long enough to see results. I think I just got tired of it and doubted my ability for success.

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Give DILD another try. Here is a tutorial you may not have read yet. Collection of techniques for DILD.

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Can you experience SP somehow after you awake from a DILD, or is that very unlikely? (this is a stupid question because I'm aware that SP is something that is normal, safe, and our bodies go through it every night but we're not aware of it)

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If you don't experience SP when you go to sleep normally, (you have a disorder), you are quite unlikely to experience it during WILDing.
What you may/may not experience are some normal sensations of your body falling asleep. These sensations were incorrectly labeled SP. True SP is when you can't move no matter what.

So these sensations and hallucinations (HH) may get scary, mostly because you have no idea what's going on. But if you read this, they will not surprise you and you will be able to stay calm. They don't last long and a lucid dream is a great revard you will get after HH are over. More about different sensations you may/may not get.

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Secondly, are scary dream experiences going to be brought on by lucid dreaming? Because if I'm not lucid and I have a scary dream, then it's just a normal nightmare. But if I am lucid in a dream and something scary comes about, shouldn't I be calm and rational and understand that I am the one in control and that I cannot be harmed

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If you lucid dream turns scary, you just simply change it. You don't have this option in regular nightmare. But in LD, you can make the scary disappear just by waving your arm, or by changing the dreamscene.

It is advisable to go to bed with happy thought. Dreams are made by thoughts, so if you scared, have dark thought, watched a horror movie before bed, all those can reflect in your dreams. Watch something pleasant. Find something nice on youtube and then keep those images in your mind as falling asleep.

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Why is it that I feel like I should avoid lucid dreaming just because I have let my fears get the better of me?

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I was also scared, really didn't want to have a scary lucid or scary HH. None of them happened for me. As soon as I get lucid, all fears are out the window, as if they never existed. It's a different world out there. Just think positivelly, you will be ok. If despite everything, a unpleasant thought creeps in while you trying to WILD, you can interrupt the process and return to it later or next night.

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I really don't want to waste more experienced lucid dreamers' time with my own problems, but I just wondered if anyone here has ever felt even a single bit like me. Thank you all so much!

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It's not a waste of time, don't worry. We all have different hang-ups and DV is the best place to ask for help in sorting them out. So just go for it. If you had just one lucid, you will know that you have nothing to worry about. Start with MILD/DILD and go from there. Happy dreams:alien:

Wow! Thank you for the genuinely caring response. I'm so glad there is a site like this where people can get help where they need. I will try to take what you said to heart and hopefully initiate a successful DILD. I do believe that when I have the first LD I will feel more confident about it. I know you've responded to me before in the DV academy some time ago. It's great to hear such relieving thoughts from an experienced lucid dreamer like yourself. I am determined and hopefully I'll stick with it in order to reach my first lucid. Thank you for addressing my inividual concerns one by one. That really helps. Wish me luck!

I would like to provide my own feedback on this one.
When i started getting into lucid dreaming (not long ago), i also had that irrational fear of the "unknown". Especially the hallucinations.
I was affraid to lay still for too long fearing i might snap into paralysis and creepy hallucinations.
One day i simply said: "F**k it, i'm gonna try this out and experience it for myself".

"Whatever you experience, remember, it's not real" <---- That sentence alone would freak me the hell out.

Whenever i read that, it was like getting told that it would happen, you just needed the "balls" to overcome it.
Even though i haven't become lucid with a WILD yet, i have been so close i could move parts of my "dream body" and during the whole process, i experienced nothing creepy.

I know that this is a vague answer, and you most likely can't draw much help from it but i haven't experienced ANYTHING scary. :)
I just don't care anymore, scary things should not keep us away from lucid dreams.

Regarding the whole lucid/nightmare scenario, i haven't been able to feel any fear in my 2 lucids. As soon as i am lucid, my brain just knows that i am the boss. To give you an example. In my first lucid i grabbed a man by the throat and ran away with him, dragging him behind me at a very high speed and at this point i "feared" that someone would chase me and try to help the guy. Soon after i was chased by 4-5 guys who threw axes after me and the ONLY thing that came to mind right there was: "Cool, more meat for the grinder".
So while i "fear" some scenarios, i haven't felt real fear, only excitement and adrenaline.

Anyway, hope you can draw something from this. ;)

Actually, Buhl, that does indeed help. I think it's important for me to remember that I should not give up lucid dreaming just because I'm afraid. Hearing your experiences helps because it comes from someone who kind of had the same issue as me and got through it. I like your attitude in the fact that you take everything carefree and know that you are the boss. Thank you for your input, it is appreciated. Now I think I need to read up here on DV in order to get some serious motivation so that I'll stick with my efforts. My biggest downfall is that I give up too easily sometimes and I think if I succeed in getting a lucid dream, I will realize that it is worth the work.

If I can truly get excited about LDs, I hope I can motivate myself to keep at it. Thanks for your help!

Beat the crap out of it. You may think I'm joking but if you tell it youre not scaredm it'll usually be scared of you. Plus its your dream, you can do what you want with your nightmare.

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Beat the crap out of it. You may think I'm joking but if you tell it youre not scaredm it'll usually be scared of you. Plus its your dream, you can do what you want with your nightmare.

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Not a very good advice, I'm affraid.

Most of the scary stuff in your dream is just a representation of something you don't like about yourself (maybe your looks, your weight, or anything like that). You rejected this part of you and now it's scaring you. You already beat the crap out of it once (figuratively), when you pushed it away from you. Now it's time to accept, that you have it, make it part of you again, so you can work on it. Offer it love and watch it change into something not scary.

If you fight it, it may come back. And you don't want to end up an astral bully. You never know what higher entity is watching you.

I sorta had the same thing as you, after my first few lucid dreams, I realised there was nothing to worry about. Confidence is key, have some belief in yourself that you will lucid dream, and you will have good dreams, its your mind, you control it, remember that :)