Kind of having an issue with feelings towards dream characters

I know this may seem silly to some people but please hear me out. So, we all know that sometimes we feel attached to fictional characters and have 'crushes for fun, nothing serious. That's with me. I sort of have crushes on these characters from a series known as EQG because I thought it was fun to entertain this idea. Nothing too extreme. Of course I still do like real women, but this was something I enjoyed having on the side. I'm 18 and I just started uni and I've been kind of feeling a little bothered that I won't be able to still enjoy this fun as the EQG are 17 and in HS and I'm starting uni and I liked having crushes that weren't creepy. A lucid dreaming goal of mine is to imagine I guess kind of wanting to see what it would be like to date one of them and I worry that I may be too old now to achieve this dream,which sort of bugs mes. It doesn't give me angst or depression or anything but i do worry a little that now I'm too old to still have this little fun and accomplish this dream goal. I know it seems trivial but what do you guys think?

Man free your mind. It's a one year difference. Have fun in dreamland.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by ThreeCat

Man free your mind. It's a one year difference. Have fun in dreamland.

---

I just wonder if it's weird due to me being in uni and them being in HS. I guess I want to be able to see this as a natural crush. Like for example, if you're 35 and dreaming about 17 yr olds, it's weird, and I don't want to be lumped into that category.

In the dream universe the only police or judge is your own personal conscience. I think you will be fine.

I see what you mean,but as I said before, I want to see it a normal attraction and not something creepy, even if it's in my own head.

^^ Sadly, Sektor, if you think something is creepy (or wrong) in a dream, it will be.

Listen to 3Cat and Valis, enjoy those EQG girls during your dreams, and, as long as your crushing was reasonably innocent, don't fret about it when you wake. And yes, you can still do this when you're 35, though hopefully you'll be crushing on someone else by then.

Dreams are timeless and age-proof, if you allow them to be so.

If it would help you, you could change your dream age beforehand. If you transform yourself to their age, it's no longer creepy and you can fulfill your wishes. Win-win.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by OneMoreDreamer

If it would help you, you could change your dream age beforehand. If you transform yourself to their age, it's no longer creepy and you can fulfill your wishes. Win-win.

---

In my situation, is there a need to actually? Because I want my feelings to feel normal the way I am and not really feel a need to change it.

It's just a year difference, so I wouldn't think there's a need. I just suggested it because I thought it might help you feel better about it. I'm not sure what you mean by wanting your feeling to feel normal. It's up to you whether you feel okay with it or not.

Let me elaborate. When I mean I want my crush to feel normal, I mean like it feels like something that could happen in real life, for example, 17 year old crushing on someone of that age and I was just worried that since I'm 18 and in starting uni, I need to give this dream goal up.

Umm? I don't see why you have to give up your dream goal even if you are going on to college or whatever. It's really up to you to make it as real as you want it to be. At the end of the day, you are the only one that can control that. ;) Actually, it's natural to feel attracted to a dream character. Just as long as you know the difference between reality and the dream world.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Ibeauty

Umm? I don't see why you have to give up your dream goal even if you are going on to college or whatever. It's really up to you to make it as real as you want it to be. At the end of the day, you are the only one that can control that. ;) Actually, it's natural to feel attracted to a dream character. Just as long as you know the difference between reality and the dream world.

---

I just fear that I need to give up my dream goal because I am getting too old. For example, if you're 30 years old and you want to dream about dating a 17 year old, then you have issues

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Sektor

I just fear that I need to give up my dream goal because I am getting too old. For example, if you're 30 years old and you want to dream about dating a 17-year-old, then you have issues

---

I get that you feel like it's forbidden love and you feel guilty but, you do know that dream characters are a part of you, right? So, are you saying that you don't like yourself? You would need to determine if attraction to fictional characters is disruptive to the rest of your life. I hope you DO NOT act this way in real life, right? How about this? Instead of worrying about whether or not you are a too old or it's creepy perhaps, you can focus your attention on learning from them. What do you like about these DCs? Why do you want them in your dream world? What do they represent in you? What do you think are their best qualities? You are the only person that can solve these issues about how you feel, not us. Btw, have you tried going lucid and talking to your DCs, yet? Just a thought.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Ibeauty

I get that you feel like it's forbidden love and you feel guilty but, you do know that dream characters are a part of you, right? So, are you saying that you don't like yourself? You would need to determine if attraction to fictional characters is disruptive to the rest of your life. I hope you DO NOT act this way in real life, right? How about this? Instead of worrying about whether or not you are a too old or it's creepy perhaps, you can focus your attention on learning from them. What do you like about these DCs? Why do you want them in your dream world? What do they represent in you? What do you think are their best qualities? You are the only person that can solve these issues about how you feel, not us. Btw, have you tried going lucid and talking to your DCs, yet? Just a thought.

---

Well, first, these characters are from a media that I watch, but I used DC as I do want to include them in my dreams. In the media they are 17 and in HS, so I was worried that I needed to give up on my goal because I am 18 and starting uni, and if it would be inappropriate to include them in my dreams as there are things we can agree that are weird.

If this is bothering you then perhaps, you could consider seeing a counselor or someone that would be able to help you deal with this issue. There are plenty of people out there that obsess over fictional people all the time. They are your fantasies and that's it.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Ibeauty

If this is bothering you then perhaps, you could consider seeing a counselor or someone that would be able to help you deal with this issue. There are plenty of people out there that obsess over fictional people all the time. They are your fantasies and that's it.

---

I wouldn't say it's that serious. I'm more bothered by the fact that I might have to give up my dream goal. I was just seeking answers if I need to in my current situation. What do you think?

Okay, good to hear! :D Personally, I think you're better off focusing becoming lucid and your waking life stuff. (IMO) ;)

True but as I sai before, it is a main motive for me to lucid dream. So I am curious, dreams or not,do you think its creepy for me being 18 years old and starting uni to want to ld about 17 yr old hs students?

Why? Are the laws there stricter in your country or is it against your religion? Just to be clear what does "u.n.i" mean? I want to make sure that we understand what that means since you never told us or never gave us a definition. Yeah, It would be creepy if you were an older adult dating or flirting with some 17-year-olds in real life. However, in the dream world and with dream-fiction characters we can make the exception of the rule. Like other people have said here, Dreams are timeless and age-proof if you allow them to be so. http://www.dreamviews.com/images/smilies/wink2.gif

Uni means university, I just started this week. And what you mean about dreaming, true, but I personally wouldn't want to dream about something I would be uncomfortable with in real life and I'm worried that now I might be too old for my dream goal, that is all since I am starting university.

Oh Okay, I just wanted to be sure. BTW. I had a dream about a dream character that represented you this morning. We were talking about the solar eclipses. To me, this is not weird because this is how I process information. Same as you! When I'm lucid I know that any crushes that I may have are not real. It may be fun but, it's all reasonably innocent, nothing more, nothing less. Is there something that you did in real life that is illegal? If not then I say you shouldn't worry about your DC crushes. It's a new school year for you! Who knows you might just find someone who will have the same qualities you are looking for in your dreamgirl on the campus that you are going to.
Edit: Good luck with becoming lucid.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Ibeauty

Oh Okay, I just wanted to be sure. BTW. I had a dream about a dream character that represented you this morning. We were talking about the solar eclipses. To me, this is not weird because this is how I process information. Same as you! When I'm lucid I know that any crushes that I may have are not real. It may be fun but, it's all reasonably innocent, nothing more, nothing less. Is there something that you did in real life that is illegal? If not then I say you shouldn't worry about your DC crushes. It's a new school year for you! Who knows you might just find someone who will have the same qualities you are looking for in your dreamgirl on the campus that you are going to.
Edit: Good luck with becoming lucid.

---

I see what you mean, but I still want to keep this crush on the side I guess, for fun. But about my question I asked, what do you think? Even if it's a dream, am I too old?

I have done things in a dream that I would never ever do in waking life. I woke up disgusted and almost in tears and I felt like crap for days.

I believe that sometimes dreams put us in different scenarios. Just to let us experience how that would feel if we did it in waking life.

Sometimes though in dreams we are able to act out our fantasies. I think that's ok, as long as we know the difference between some "bad" fantasies in dreams=ok, waking life = not ok. And keep it at that.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Sektor

... Like for example, if you're 35 and dreaming about 17 yr olds, it's weird, ...

---

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Sektor

.. they are 17 and in HS, so I was worried that I needed to give up on my goal because I am 18 ..

---

What are you really asking?

1. Is it ok for a 18 yr old to date/have a crush on a 17 year old?

Yes. One year difference is ok, especially since she is over a legal age, which here is 16 I believe. Otherwise it would be statutory rape. (both parties agree to have sex but one is not of legal age to give consent)

2. Are you 35 and you ar crushing on a 17 yr old?
She is of legal age and if there is pure love from both sides, who is to judge?

3. Are you 35 and you are crushin on underaged (under 16) and you are asking us to approve it on pretense that you are 35 (18) and she is underaged?
No, that's pedophelia. You go to jail for that.

I'm only saying the #3 because I'm pretty sure that you know that 18 yr old can date 17 yr old. But then you ask "what if I was 35"? Wut? Are you?

I'd like to remind you that we can be any age we choose in the dream reality. In both dream as well as waking reality we are agless. We are all metaphysical beings having a human experience. Our age is a "physical" concept and dreams are in no way physical by any means. Rules of this reality don't necessarily have to apply to our dream reality, same with social norms. In the end, it comes down to what you feel comfortable doing. If you feel uncomfortable with something, then don't do it. It's simple as that.

You don't have to seek approval from others to engage yourself in experiences in your dream reality. For example, I don't like hurting people so I naturally try my very best not to hurt anyone even if I know it's not the waking reality. However, there are people out there that relish the freedom to do what they want in the dream reality and may even go on a rampage hurting everyone in sight - does that mean they are bad people? I don't think so. Is everyone who play games where killing is involved bad people? By contract, my dream characters are part of me or others who are visiting my dream reality so I'm a bit reluctant to hurt them, however, I play lots of games where killing may be involved and I'm not particularly bothered by that. In the end, it doesn't matter what anyone says. It's entirely up to you. Have fun. ^^

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by gab

What are you really asking?

1. Is it ok for a 18 yr old to date/have a crush on a 17 year old?

Yes. One year difference is ok, especially since she is over a legal age, which here is 16 I believe. Otherwise it would be statutory rape. (both parties agree to have sex but one is not of legal age to give consent)

2. Are you 35 and you ar crushing on a 17 yr old?
She is of legal age and if there is pure love from both sides, who is to judge?

3. Are you 35 and you are crushin on underaged (under 16) and you are asking us to approve it on pretense that you are 35 (18) and she is underaged?
No, that's pedophelia. You go to jail for that.

I'm only saying the #3 because I'm pretty sure that you know that 18 yr old can date 17 yr old. But then you ask "what if I was 35"? Wut? Are you?

---

I'm in the 1st position. I'm just asking is an 18 year old starting uni is on the same level as i don't know a 30,35, yr old or whatever crushing on someone who's 17 or something.I don't mean to sound judgemental, but I do think #2 is kind of odd tbh

If it makes you feel better, my departed significant other appears as 7 to 13 year old in lot of my dreams and I don't love her any less. I'm in love with her soul and not her body. We both have very low libido too, so we don't participate in much erotic activites. However, we have gone to hotsprings in a lucid dreams together with age difference. I too take on younger age form in lot of my dreams, lucid and regular ones. I hope you get over whatever you feel conflected about. Of course, if it's fictional characters that makes it even less cause for concern in my opinion. I would still advise you to seek concent from the dream character in you wish to do anything erotic. ^^