its exactly 3:24 am.. and i just had the worst dream and i want to write it down b4 i forget,,but first ill tell you that i had a big fight with my mom b4 i went to sleep and i really love her and i hate myself for hurting her all the time..
ohhk..i cant remember the beginning...i think i was coming from the trac banquet the sAME as we really did last night and i was with my friend kellen and maybe someone else i dont knoe...and we were driving and it was a curvy path turning left and i dont knoe how but i was making street signs...the white and black ones like speed signs but i was thinking like really thinking in my head and in the dream of what to write..i made one say "hi." and whats up..and i remember i was writing i like the technic thing that was makling is appear because i help it away so kellen couldnt see what i made them...im not shure who was driving..but we were driving really fast from one of are coaches, mrs. egan.
and i remember on this swirvy curve there was a car to the left bhind us and my egan had a car that i can picture in my head but i dont know what it is..looked like a submarine and she put her blinkers on trying to catch us and everything but she didnt...and all of a sudden we're in this neighborhood..and we park the car really fast and jump out into this lawn. and run into this house...theres cowble stone paths and orange flowers on the sides..and dark dirt/multch and the house is being painted orange because i remember running past orange paint cans that were opened with paint brushes...and there was this guy chasing after us in the house...a boy who i didnt recognize with short brown hair and acne. brown eyes..and all through this him chasing me through the hallway of the house and outside past the flowers i think i was yelling to my mom on the phone..and told her whree i was and i cee her car as i run up..and i open the door but no ones with her ..she was on the passengers side though..sitting up..and i open it and she crumbles over crying..and i can see the pain on her face and shes wearing her peach shirt and comfy shorts she does,,and i can see blood on her shirt..like a big inch wide hole but covered my the shirt making it a maroon color..and shes crying and hurling over and i go "mom, im sorry i love you so much"..and i touch her shoulders...and i wake up.
i hate myself for how i am..i killed me mom..i have the feeling in the pit of my stomach,,im almost afraid to go to bed again..but im really tired and its uncomfortably hot in here.[img]
