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Tommo - Thing is, my involvement with that girl lasted two dates, I had to find my own resolve after that. I couldn't just say fuck it and smoke the moment I realized she wasn't that interested in me. So I figured out something else. Realizing someone you want doesn't want you has an effect. You're humbled but embittered, steadfast, finished. You gain the opportunity to look at yourself and say you don't want to be that person. If that person can't find acceptance, there's no point in being them. You can turn a corner, but smoking's still ingrained in habits, the body still clings to it. Every unconscious thought serves the body, and the body wants nicotine. My disgust of rejection pushed me forward part of the way, but the method I keep referring to is super-consciousness, bringing full awareness to the compulsion. Problem is right now I really don't care enough. I'm grateful for the power to be grateful for the little drops of relief I get.
Zhaylin - I don't know if comfort is the problem. Perhaps distraction, I enjoy doing anything except what I ought to be doing. I'm sure however I frame it, though, I'm wrong.