Why are some people almost ignored despite being "very good-looking", and vice versa?
I am a 28-year-old male, and I wonder what it is that make some people make such a powerful sexual impression at parties and other social gatherings?
I have heard stories about guys who "look good" and because of this "are constantly approached and noticed everywhere" - and sure, I guess this could happen - at least if they have a great charisma or appear "available" and "inviting" - but I have also seen "average-looking" people who somehow manage to make a lot of people interested, just by "being there" and perhaps making some conversations.
And I have personally always been considered "very good-looking", and some people have even gone so far as to say I look like people like Brad Pitt and James Dean, and some Spanish woman once told me about two years ago that I was "so beautiful", but I don't notice anything like this in everyday life (I rarely visit parties though, and when I do, I tend to stay for a rather short time; maybe that's part of my own problem) - a lot of girls even seem to be afraid of me and have a very serious body language, or simply don't notice me at all (although I am kind of asocial myself and rarely spend time with other people, I spend most of my time and school and at home, so that could of course also be a problem) - and I even know some girls like this, those who look really really good but still often tend to be ignored.
I find this very confusing, what is it really that gives such a powerful impression?
It doesn't seem to be all about looks, since I know several people whose degree of popularity is vastly different from their attractiveness, whether they have actively pursued that popularity or not.
I am particularly confused about the whole thing that "attractive guys constantly get approached just because they look good" - I have never heard of anything like this before, aren't women usually very focused on a guy's charisma and self-confidence as well?
I find it hard to believe that a guy with model looks would get anywhere if he went around by himself at some party and looked insecure and stiff, no matter how attractive he was - especially when average-looking guys sometimes seem to be treated the same way.
I don't mean to be obsessed with looks or anything, I just find this whole thing very confusing and contradictory in many ways, and I would like to understand it.