How do you really soothe yourself?

Sometimes I really need to feel peaceful, I really need that feeling of security and relaxation. But I'm always worrying about something. I need something that really works, some way I can just loose myself in tranquility. I don't even care if it's a false tranquility (whatever one of those is) just so long as it keeps me sane. I have to have a sort of 'time out' state.

Meditation usually just presses the reset button, so that I can focus on something I need to do, but it hasn't so far given me any deep feelings of relaxation. I'm starting to feel like I need it, because I'm just too paranoid all the time. Nothing else: computer games, music, socialising, bathing, reading, sleeping, cannabis or alcohol... none of it does the trick properly because although it can make me feel somewhat good there's always that little nagging guilt in the back of my head that there's something fearful I should be thinking about. I think if I don't get these peaceful time-outs I could go a bit off the rails like I did earlier this year.

What do you guys do to really 'put yourselves out', if anything?

Sexual healin'.

I just face reality. Not so 'soothing', just peaceful/nothing.

Ah... you see, that was one worldly pleasure I completely forgot to mention!

Yeah, nothingness is cool...



No seriously; just getting on with it is the most desirable tactic. However, I am talking about general paranoia. It's not actually 'addressable', you just need to find a way to calm those fear sensors in your brain. Smoking pot helped at first but that's just for appreciating my sensuality. But it doesn't help get rid of the guilt associated with it (I fear that this means I'm becoming 'dependant' on sensuality).

All the same I could feel guilty being too relaxed; but the idea is that I recognise the guilt as being fake. So if something can just sedate me, I wouldn't mind it because logically I know I need it.

Oh, and; my sexuality is probably the last place I would turn because that's sensual just like the rest.

But so is simply relaxing... oh goddammit I'm so confused.

Masturbating with a cheese grater while listening to megadeth.

Meditating by a flowing stream after drinking some green tea.

Just turn me loose in an old woods. I tend to lose all connections with my present problems in the "outside world" if I'm in a large, diverse wooded area.

First, an explanation of why you feel worried or anxious.

In our minds, we are never present. We are either living in memory of the past, or we are living in anticipating of an imaginary future. There is a time gap between the present moment(now), and the past and future, and it is in this time gap that pyschological fears arise. Guilt, remorse, regret, bitterness, is a result of too much past. Worry, anxiety, stress, is a result of too much future.

Be present, close the time gap, end past and future, and you will be free of psychological fear.

The meditation techniques I've presented in this thread, will help you to become present.

masturbation with anal stimulants.

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Originally Posted by grasshoppa

masturbation with anal stimulants.

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That's not very relaxing.

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Originally Posted by ClouD

That's not very relaxing.

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oh...was it a good try at lest?

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Originally Posted by grasshoppa

oh...was it a good try at lest?

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The example is a stimulant of an experience, not a peaceful one.

Or at least it would be if my prostate gland worked properly.

A coffee, and apple with a quiet fan and music... the only thing that keeps me sane any more.

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Originally Posted by Idolfan

The example is a stimulant of an experience, not a peaceful one.

Or at least it would be if my prostate gland worked properly.

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TMI my friend, per usual.

Seriously though, Tai chi is great for calming down and relaxing.

not sure

Tai Chi helps me relax and helps clear my mind. I also do Yoga. ^.^

Pillow hugging.
Hugging or caressing my dog.
Lying down on the floor and looking up at the sky.
Heavy (as heavy as possible) metal.
Making sculptures with any objects I find around me.
Expressionist dance.
Expressionist dance.
Expressionist dance.
Yoga.
Youtube for deep music.
Staying underwater for as long as I can (sea or pool).
Drinking a full bottle of soda in a gulp.
Masturbating properly (taking more than just 2 minutes).

Call of Duty MW1, provided that I do well. It backfires once in a while.

Resting my head on my cat like a pillow is soothing. He's like a warm heat generating, furry pillow, and the purring is so loud up to your ear that it's all you need to think about. I try not to rest there too long or be too heavy on him, though.

Firstly I try to face the problem and see how I can resolve it. If it is unclear what makes me worry and feel anxiety I speak to a friend about it and have a time together; that usually resolved the problem. A consolation and soothing words from a close to you person is priceless and irreplacable. Or else, I listen to the music, and I really concentrate on it. You can also watch some funny videos @ utube...

masturbation and music can be very soothing

especially when mixed.

Music can get me back from a bad mood, or just w/e

I like music

Video games.

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Originally Posted by Kromoh

Pillow hugging.
Hugging or caressing my dog.
Lying down on the floor and looking up at the sky.
Heavy (as heavy as possible) metal.
Making sculptures with any objects I find around me.
Expressionist dance.
Expressionist dance.
Expressionist dance.
Yoga.
Youtube for deep music.
Staying underwater for as long as I can (sea or pool).
Drinking a full bottle of soda in a gulp.
Masturbating properly (taking more than just 2 minutes).

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Lol, so you're a metalhead as well! \m/

Not exactly soothing though...

You'll have to pitch me up on what 'deep music' is.

Meditation, of course, the simple breathing exercises we all know and love :D. Gets me less anxious, for sure.

Then there's the practice of mindfulness, in which I just try to let things come and go as they are, without predicament. Emotions are there for a reason, they're your body's alarm system, so to say, so I never try to completely ignore them or try to get rid of them, as I think that'd be counter productive. You always hear of severe traumas and heart-related problems to the stresses you face when you do that, so in stead, I just accept whatever I'm feeling as they are.

Then there's myouuuuusic ^^, the awesomest thing in the world. The problem I get sometimes is that I just get too depressed that no music can cheer my up, and I actually get pissed when I listen to happy music XD

Oh, the irony... :P

That's when I just let my emotions flow, and I just try to surf on my emotional waves as much as I can, so to say.

And then, of course, there are the people I love and like. The people that quite literally make you "forget your troubles". I have the suspicion that being social really could be the cure to all stress. XD


Have a great day! ^^

-Tim

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Originally Posted by Idolfan

Lol, so you're a metalhead as well! \m/

Not exactly soothing though...

You'll have to pitch me up on what 'deep music' is.

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Lul yep.

And by deep music I mean ambient music, videogame music, some classical or electronic music. Stuff you could meditate to.

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Originally Posted by Kromoh

Lul yep.

And by deep music I mean ambient music, videogame music, some classical or electronic music. Stuff you could meditate to.

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You like trance?

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Originally Posted by LucidFlanders

You like trance?

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Hmm yep, but I get tired of it quickly.

- listen to relaxing music
- talk to my mommmy.
- play/cuddle with my cat.
- write
- meditate/ yoga.
- drink lots of water/ tea
- take some vitamin C, and sleep to dream.

= )

Well, some stress relieving things I do are definately draw, write, and vigorously dance the shit out of my apartment. Sometimes the music just gets to me so well that my body starts shaking and I get the shivers, now that's a good feeling.

The stuff I write when pissed off is definately not for the light of heart, though, but getting a good image of it is very satisfying.

It depends entirely on what's stressing me out.
I know it's not "politically correct", but self-injury helps when I'm at my very worst (when I'm in an internal "rage" or overly depressed). A couple little "cat scratches" is usually enough to "ground" me. Now-a-days, I usually work on one of my tattoos instead (x-acto knife and cigarette ashes).

If my mind is just too cluttered and rambling, binaural beats from my iPod Touch does the trick (Mind freek and MindWave are best IMHO).

If I want to disassociate (usually for creative purposes), the Musical "Jekyll and Hyde" usually does the trick.

If I'm feeling paranoid or angry for no reason, hard rationalization and delving deeply into my subconscious normally works.

Not to sound too intrusive, but where do you inflict the scars? On your wrists, thighs, where? I do it on my chest, but that's just because it feels good when aroused.

Also, who's seen Saw 3 where Amanda takes that hunting knife and digs deep into her thigh? FAPFAPFAPFAP

Meditation.

Me? When I was a kid, it was always my upper thighs, then my calves. Eventually, I moved to my upper arms.
Now that I'm "tattooing" myself, I have a butterfly on my thigh, a crescent (sp!) moon and star on the inside of my wrist and the other half of my "symbol" on the outside of that same wrist, and I have three lines that look like scratches at the very top of my "thigh" (?) along the top corner of my bikini line.

Whenever I've signed my name since a young teen I always make a mark something like a long curvy "Z" with an almost "U" shape in the middle of it, then I add the moon and a little * . It means more to me than my name lol. But it's concealed beneath a wrist watch most of the time (my hubby is NOT a fan of body modifications to say the least!!)

I also pierced my naval 14 years ago and my lip recently. I'm *thinking* about piercing my nose next. I do my piercings when I'm angry or in an otherwise "bad place" and I don't feel a thing (until afterward of couse :roll: )

Instrumental music and being in great outdoors [preferably combined] usually does the trick for me.

Stretching really helps at the end of the day too, as long as it's done slowly and with the conscious effort to relax; different from the kind you'd do in the morning. There's nothing better.

Sometimes I write haiku too. It slows me down; puts me in a quiet and reflective mood.

Whatever makes you feel the most at ease [the most yourself] I suppose, and quiets excess noise.

this is odd but when i get ready to sleep i rub my foot back and forth on my sheets very slowly... i don't do it on purpose just sometimes i catch my self doing it.

I can't believe nobody has mentioned exercise!! A good hard workout... get the endorphins flowing, and afterwards you feel blissed out completely.

Yeah, back before the operation on my arm, I used to work out alot. It's very satisfying when angry, etc. Especially when listening to pumping music. It just became a chore to me, though, and I had more fun NOT doing it after a while.

VILD...kinda fun to try and place yourself in an entirely different setting, down to the exact sensory experiences.
Music...I'm always plugged into it.
Chillin' to custom isochronics.
Makin' custom isochronics.
Browsing the net.
Eating...which I can get away with, due to my epic metabolism.
Sleeping...derp.

...although really, I'm a pretty naturally chill dude. I don't need to consciously relax...I just am, all the time. It is very rare that I should ever encounter stress, and when I do, it is often fleeting. Guess I'm just lucky. :content:

mostly when i want to relax I just breathe deeply and clear my mind with meditation. That's clinically/therapeutically proven to be the most effective way to relax and relieve stress/tension



and of course masturbation/sex...in fact, I think I might do this right now lol

EpicDreamer!! I do that too lol!!! But I usually rub one foot against the other. After awhile it starts to hurt though lol.
It gets on my hubby's last nerve, but seeing as I only share his bed once every couple months, it's not a real problem :?

*Eidt*
Oh yeah, I pierced my nose. I did it with a thick/large/disinfected safety pin, then I forced a 16 gauge snapable lip ring in it. But *GRRRRR*, I got the angle wrong. I bought a real nose ring and it sets in the whole perfectly, but it doesn't go all the way through oddly enough.
When my hubby sees it, I'm going to have to find a way to relax ASAP lmbo.

Whenever I get frustrated and edgy, usually after a large bout of studying, I like to just lay down on the floor. Seeing things from a different perspective and feeling the cool floor makes me less tense.

I like looking at shapes on the wall, carpet/flooring/ceiling and making mental images from them (like seeing forms from clouds).
My kids say I'm weird for it lol but it is oddly relaxing.

I honestly feel that music is one of the best ways to tap into/express/affect your emotions. Like if I'm ever feelig angry I just blast whatever metal I find appropriate through my iPod, and it's like the anger just dissapears. Likewise I find just picking up my guitar and thrashing out a good metal jam will deal with whatever negative emotions I'm feeling. By the same token, playing the right music can really chill you out (the first song that comes to mind is "beyond The Grey Sky" by 311. I also find that song good when I'm just feeling kinda down, helpsto pit thongs into perspective).

For me, its playing a videogame, smoking a blunt and popping heads off in a fps shooter.

For me I practice the Option Method in these turbulent but fertile moments to find acceptance of myself and my feelings, identify & release limiting beliefs.

Theres also EFT or the Emotional Freedom Technique. You can go to thier website at www.emofree.com.

There's also Mantra Meditation. I like to use the 108 beads to count. I think it helps deepen the practice

My favorite is the Option Method by Bruce di Marsico. It is amazing and profound.

Happy Trails =0)

Haha, Zhaylin, I like to watch the clouds too. I get lost for ages just watching them move into figures and break apart, it's great. I like to try and get into the little details, too; they give me a lot of ideas for creatures in my books. That's some good shit, right there.

...dabble with Photoshop. I suck at expressing my artistic side in the physical world, but programs I can handle.