I don't know if I can describle this clearly, but I'll
try..
I was dreaming about all my friends at a party, it seemed
real.
All of a sudden I was standing outside, the sun wasn't
out but, it wasn't dark. It was just yellow and the
trees were so green. Then I realized that I was
consciously thinking. I felt like my eyes could move in
any direction and I wouldn't wake up. I had a although of
how beautiful it was and realized I could do anything I
wanted except move my head, so I didn't lose it. I kept
myself there for as long as I could. Then it turned dark
almost purple night and then yellow, very yellow with
orange leaves falling. it was like space and time and
season didn't exist they just were and blended so I
continued to try to go with it even though I was scared
of what i was seeing. Mind you I was thoroughly conscious
and didn't understand how I had been seeing this with my
eyes closed. When it turned what seemed to be autumn my
ears were ringing and in felt like wind was going through
them fast. My body was in a state of falling and my mind
was terrified. So I started breathing really hard to get
out of it, I was so afraid. I felt I was going somewhere
and I didn't know where and if I didn't get out I would
know how to later. My body was paralized and I couldn't
move it at all. I tried and tried. then when my minded
turned black, my body felt like it had slammed back down
on my bed. My brain was tingling on both sides. left and
right. I had used both sides of my brain at the same time
for a moment and as I write this I truly regret getting
frightened and wish I had gone with it. It was the most
intense experience I have ever encountered. I remember
getting scared while it was happening, because it
reminded me of the butterfly effect. And in this state of
enlightenment I was thinking of that superficial movie
and wondering if I was going to end up some place else
and not be able to return. So I let go of this wonderful,
intense, beautiful, scary feeling all because I was
terrified and was conscious through all the most intense
emotions and colors and mind boggling movements and gazes
all because I was too afraid to continue. it was
something I hope will happen again and hope that I will
have enough courage to stay through. I don't know where
my mind was going and wish I did.
