Ok let's get this rollin'
Just c'mon in and RP it's a bar but there are rules.
No killing inside the bar take it to the curb.
You can get K.O.ed by the drinks in here so beds are readiy available.
NO DESTORYING THE BAR!
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Ok let's get this rollin'
Just c'mon in and RP it's a bar but there are rules.
No killing inside the bar take it to the curb.
You can get K.O.ed by the drinks in here so beds are readiy available.
NO DESTORYING THE BAR!
Man in trenchcoat walks in, Sits down at the bar, orders the strongest drink, tosses it back, and sits on the barstool drunk
(i liked the old one with lost soul ruling the world) :cry:
Another man, much shorter, wanders in looking confused, he asks "wait, isnt this suposed to be an arcade?" he glances around for a bit, then resigns himself to sitting in a corner booth, pulling out a gameboy.
there's a rumble outside the bar. the sound is from a black 1964 buick riviera. the engine cuts out and a door slams shut. a few moments later a man walks in the bar. he's tall and well built. he's wearing dark sunglasses, a black suit, and a black fedora. the stranger walks up to the bar and orders a pint of guinness. while waiting for his drink he turns to the man in the trench coat that's now staring at him in a drunken stupor. the stranger says to the drunk, "keep staring bud and you'll be breathing through a hose by the end of the night." the drunk's attention wanders back to his drink. the bartender slides the stranger his drink. the stranger goes to a booth to wait. as he's turning to sit down his coat opens just enough to show the 9mm berretta strapped to his side. this man didn't come here for the guinness. he came for something a little more dangerous. -- the stranger takes his hat and sunglasses off, takes a swig of the guinness, and lights up a cigarette. he's waiting for someone...
the bar falls silent again, except for the occasional rapid button pushing coming from the guy in the corner and his gameboy.
Don't you guys talk?
note please mark actions with * * thxs
O |)347|-| no stealing drinks ask me r someone who works here thxs
and i work here so ask me
*lifts his eyebrow at anima's comment*
*taps out cigarette in ashtray, lights another*
*remains silent, but deep in thought*
*Wasup walks into the bar*
*Everyone shushes as the almighty paces throughout the bar*
Wasup: I want beer.
Bartender: It's on the house.
*Wasup takes his free beer*
*Someone comes up to start a fight with him and one punch from wasup and WADDAWOWEE CA BOODLE DO FAKA LAKA SHOOBABBY SHIBBIDY SHAW WICKER WOWA!! HE'S DOWN.*
A man that has been sitting at the bar sees the whole thing
*he stands up from his seat*
*Goes up to wasup* "Sweet moves kid, how 'bout goin' up against me"
(This should make things interesting :D )
*wasup looks down upon the midgit*
"Well I suppose im up for the challenge"
*they both walk outside and put their backs up to each other*
"Walk thirteen paces forward and draw"said wasup.
*cue western dueling music*
*they walk thirteen paces, turn around and pull out supersoakers*
(This should be even more interesting :))
*Psh plash!!*
Midget: AHH MY EYES WHAT THE HELL IS IN THERE!!?!?!?!
Wasup: Sperm, bitch.
Midger: THAT'S FOUL PLAY!
Wasup: Piss off.
*Wasup flashes his muscles*
*The midget is disgraced*
WTF??? I ain't a midget!!! :mad:Quote:
Originally posted by wasup
*Psh plash!!*
Midget: AHH MY EYES WHAT THE HELL IS IN THERE!!?!?!?!
Wasup: Sperm, bitch.
Midger: THAT'S FOUL PLAY!
Wasup: Piss off.
*Wasup flashes his muscles*
*The midget is disgraced*
lol :rolllaugh: :rolllaugh: pretend that the midgit isn't you, create another character. :DQuote:
{alma}[]WTF??? I ain't a midget!!! :mad:[/b]Quote:
Originally posted by wasup
*Psh plash!!*
Midget: AHH MY EYES WHAT THE HELL IS IN THERE!!?!?!?!
Wasup: Sperm, bitch.
Midger: THAT'S FOUL PLAY!
Wasup: Piss off.
*Wasup flashes his muscles*
*The midget is disgraced*
*the stranger, angered by this insolence, slips on some brass knuckles and walks outside to the duel. he sees wasup standing there with some sort of water pistol in hand. the stranger then walks up to wasup*
before wasup knows it he's on the ground. his head is throbbing. he doesn't know where he is. all he knows is that there's a pistol aiming to give him some "reconstructive" surgery. the man with the pistol gives wasup and ultimatum. he says, "either you can cut the shit and walk back into that bar to have a good time... or i'll put two in your chest and dump you in the east river. it's your choice... choose wisely. i’m the fastest gun in town and i can hand your ass to you in a fight, don’t make me prove my words.”
it’s deadly quiet as wasup weighs his options. somewhere in the city a siren wails...
DAMMIT!!! I wanted to fight...
*A man with shifty eyes walks into the bar from a backroom and sit down at a table, looking at everyone*
*I'm just walking by*. IP addresses are not hidden from veiw.
as the cabaret commences, the man with shifty eyes stats to tap his foot:
shifty eye "hey man this is good stuff"
*with that he slings off his jacket, pulls out a trumbone from his back pocket and gets down on it*
the barmaid looks decidely disturbed.
*Man walks in. Long black trench coat sways after him.*
* he sees the fight out the corner of his eye, but keeps on walking without so much as moving his head.*
* sits at a stool and orders a tallboy*
.. By now everyone can see that he has 2 katanas equipped. One on each side.
*pulls out his Desert egale and blows the bartenders head off his shoulders*
I knew that bastard was ripping me off.
*steals bartenders tip stash*
Ok so what'll you guys drink?
*starts picking up bartenders body*
*hears the gunshot from within the bar*
*knocks wasup out with the butt of his pistol*
*gets in his car and drives off*
*A Moogle walks into the bar.*
*He sees everybody with guns.*
:shock:
*Moogle runs away*
Kaniaz runs in and blows up the bar.
Kaniaz Er, sorry, I just couldn't resist. Forget that ever happened.
Kaniaz drugs everybody, stuffs them back in a time machine before the bar exploded and the RP continues as if Kaniaz hadn't run in, blown up the bar, drugged everybody and stuffed them back in a time machine.
Blowing stuff up??? I thought you were a known admirer of the IMPLOSION!Quote:
Originally posted by Kaniaz
Kaniaz runs in and blows up the bar.
Kaniaz Er, sorry, I just couldn't resist. Forget that ever happened.
Kaniaz drugs everybody, stuffs them back in a time machine before the bar exploded and the RP continues as if Kaniaz hadn't run in, blown up the bar, drugged everybody and stuffed them back in a time machine.
*finally done with bartenders body*
Oh well...
*Now Hiring*
*stuffs bartenders corpse into wasup's car*
Yo Naruto here's ya drink, enjoy.
A man comes in with white hair, a red trenchcoat, and bright blue eyes.(looks exactly like dante from "devil may cry and dmc 2)
*looks around slowly*
*spots the guy in the corner playing the gameboy*
ffx-dreamzWell, what have we here?
*gameboy guy looks up suddenly terrified*
ffx-dreamzI think your playing that a bit to loudly, perhaps I should turn the sound down for you.
*unsheathes sword*
*The gameboy drops his gameboy and runs out of the bar*
ffx-dreamzW0ot I got me a gameboy..Works everytime!
*suddely everyone in the bar is pissed at ffx-dreamz*
ffx-dreamzfuck...
*anima steps up..ready to fight ffx-dreamz*
animaWhat I did to the bartender was nothing compared to what you did to the gameboy dude..For that you will pay!
ffx-dreamzBring it!
*anima unsheathes his/her sword ready for battle*
*A big sword fight follows but in the end it is a draw*
ffx-dreamzGood fight, I guess were even.
animaYes, and as long as you don't steal anymore gameboys it will stay that way.
*ffx-dreamz sighs*
ffx-dreamzOk, I suppose.
*anima and ffx-dreamz shake hands and become best friends*
(I hope I didn't kill you all with my horrible story telling)
His
Looks out the door and begins shooting at gameboy guy.
LOL that's hillarious! uhh, anyways back to me..Quote:
Originally posted by Lunarian Moogle
*A Moogle walks into the bar.*
*He sees everybody with guns.*
:shock: *
*Moogle runs away*
*Reaches over and grabs a bottle of whiskey and drinks straight out of the bottle.. ( oooh badass.. :roll: )
*Needs a drink and, since the bartender is dead, goes behind the counter and takes a glass of milk*
Have any muffins? *he asks no-one in particular*
Death hands Stalker a muffin. It's chocolate with chocolate chips in it.
"SIGH" "WELL I GUESS YOU'VE DECIDED TO RE INTRODUCE ME AT LAST" death smiles and nods at Anima. "THANKYOU FOR THE BUISNESS" he notices the sign. "SINCE I'M NOT THAT BUSSY WOULD YOU MIND IF I TAKE THE JOB?" without waiting for his reply death walks behind the bar, ready to work.
* Xisdence gets out of his car across the street..........walks over to liquid nitrogen tank
* clicks nozzle to -on- position
* steps into bar, cocking handle on nitrogen hose, stopping all actions in bar and bringing all noise to a hault
* defies conscience and releases trigger to soak every member in bar besides bar tender and Anima
( silent frozen bodies positioned in animated styles stand all through the bar, Xisdence walks through..his boots slicing the icy frost remnants)
Xisdence- "ahhh could i grab water thanx mate"
Bar tender- " dont fancy an ale mr........"
Xisdence- "nah ill wait till the others cool off......im happy here quitely thinking to myself....besides...arnt theyre stange facial expressions enough of an entertainment for now"
Bar tender- "hehe yeh funny that........thatll be $2.50 thanx mate"
IM BACK!!
Sry for not posting in ages but i've been on AT a lot.
*Wakes up after a long sleep and immediately start to cough because of all the dust*
Where did everyone go?
*Goes and opens a window to let the air clean the place. Unfortunately the window crashes (to the floor)*
*Tsubasa walks in slowly and looks around*
"Hello? My name is Tsubasa...excuse me, sir, are you still serving? I'm awfully thirsty..."
Leo walks in and then asks for a drink.
Leo: Do ya hav a drink?
Bartender: Yea sure wat so ya want?
Leo: Coke, and make it cold, with ice.
Bartender: Sure thing.
*Bartender makes drink and then passes it to Leo*
Leo: Thanx
*Leo drinks drink and spits it out*
Leo: THIS AIN'T COKE! THIS IS PEPSI!!!!!!!!
*Blows up Bartender with his brainwave powers*
*The replacement bartender walks in and gives Leo his right drink*
Leo: Thanx
Bartender: No prob.
*Leo drinks his Coke*
Leo: Thanx again mate
*Stays there, waiting for someone to come in and talk*
*Tsubasa spies Leo enjoying a long sip of his Coke*
"Oh, Mister Leo, please -- could I have a small sip? I'm so thirsty, but I just realized that I have no money..."
Leo: Hmmmmm *reads mind* yes u seem like a nice person, here ya go
*Hands Tsubasa coke*
Tsubasa: Thank you sir :)
..........
*Tsubasa takes a little birdy sip and hands the glass back to Leo*
"I feel better now...so Mister Leo, what do you plan to do today?"
Leo: Well i'm hoping to go out on a quest to rid the world of all evil..... wanna join me? Together we can start a whole new thread and rid the world of all evil :) But we musn't do it here or else we will disrupt the very fabric of space and time that this thread was meant to be! In other words: Join me, start new "quest", and kill evil. You decide :)
*Tsubasa blushes*
"Well, Mister Leo, I am already on a quest to defeat the evil Ebru Labadon from destroying all of heaven and earth -- so I suppose I wouldn't be abandoning my mission by joining with you. Besides, I believe that Ebru and his minions have everything to do with all of the evil that is everywhere now. Yes! I would very much like to join you!"
*Tsubasa smiles*
Leo:Hmmm well i haven't seen much evil lately so far, so i would like to join you on you're quest to defeat Ebru and his minions! If that's OK with you of course?
*Tsubasa blushes again*
"Oh, I would be very grateful if you did that, Mister Leo! I need all the help I can get...Ebru is very crafty."
*Suddenly, another bartender appears before them*
"Can I get you gentlemen anything else?"
*Tsubasa shivers; the bartender notices*
"Can I get you a coat, sir?"
"Well, I -- I suppose."
*Tsubasa whispers to Leo*
"Mister Leo, I got a chill from that bartender -- I think he may be somehow evil!"
*The bartender walks out and returns with a long coat*
"Here you are, sir..."
*He puts the coat over Tsubasa*
"Thank you --!"
*Suddenly, the coat wraps itself tightly around Tsubasa and begins electrocuting him*
"IIIIIIIIITAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!"
*The bartender laughs dryly*
"Now, I have you, angel boy!"
Leo: Oh damn it!!!
*Leo sends brainwaves at the coat and unravels it from Tsubasa*
*Leo runs for the Bartender and jumps for him but just as soon as he wraps him around his arms he disappears*
Leo: Are you alright Tsubasa? That was quite a shock. I think Ebru has attacked. We must fight back! Come now Tsubasa! Follow me to the land of the Demon Age and we will get rid of Ebru! Once and for all!!!!!!
*Tsubasa coughs*
"Yes, I'm OK Mister Leo...thank you so much for saving me! Yes, let's go! We haven't much time, now!"
*Tsubasa runs out of the bar*
HEY!!!! Demon age is my topic! woot!
*on topic*
*a man walks into bar, slips on ice*
wow, what happened hear?
*uses powers to unfreze everyone*
there you go. hey bartender, have scotch?
*pulls out cigar and lights it*
thanks.
*sips*
well, back to Demon Age. goodbye! ill be back soon........ maybe
*Leo returns back from quest*
Leo:Hey there peeps!
Everybody: Hi!!!
*Walks over to bar*
*Bartender quivers*
Leo: Hi!
Bartender: Arggghhh!
*Bartender runs*
Leo: Um ok :|
*Tsubasa enters* "Sorry I took so long, Mister Leo!"
*he walk in and sits down, leaning back* "Ahh..."
*notices a glass of icewater on the table* "Hmmm...well, I am thirsty...and no one seems to have drank from it..."
*happily sips water*
"I wouldn't do that if I were you" Stalker says from the dark corner where the window used to be.
*Goes to a table and sits down by it, crushing some glass from the broken window on the way muttering something about "stupid" and "windows"*
"That's not ordinary water"
*Suddenly falls asleep*
*takes glass away from lips*
*looks over at the sleeping Stalker curiously*
*stares at glass*
"Then what kind of water is it?"
*Blorgulox appears out of nowhere*
Says to bartender: Gimme a gin and tonic
Bartender: I'm sorry sir, this bar has no alcoholic beverages
Blorgulox: WHAT?! :mad:
*The Bartender's head blows up*
Blorgulox: Woops...
*Replacement walks in*
Bartender: Sorry about that sir, here is your gin and tonic
*Takes a sip out of his drink and spits it out*
Blorgulox: This drink tastes like someone came in it!
Bartender: Sorry sir, I got a little excited, it's my first day
Blorgulox: Oh... I do that sometimes too, well, get me another one
*A while later*
Blorgulox: Shit... Did you get excited again?
Bartender: Sorry sir, I couldn't help myself...
*Bartender's genetelia disintegrate*
Blorgulox: I guess I'll be the bartender for now...
Tsubasa turns his head and observes the exchange between Blorgulox and the bartenders. He grimces at some of the things mentioned. He smiles nervously at Blorgulox as he takes his place behind the bar.
"Hmm...maybe I won't order that Cherry Coke now -- oh wait, I don't have any money, anyway..."
*sighs, leans back*
I'll get you a drink Tsubasa :)
What would you like?
*Blorgulox reads Tsubasa's mind*
Blorgulox: Stop picturing my wife naked Tsubasa...
*Uses Orgazmo skill and Tsubasa drops to the floor*
Blorgulox: heheheheh.... :lol:
*Suddenly wakes up again*
"Might be heavy water. Or some acid. Then again it might just be normal water after all. You can never be sure"
*Looks suspiciously at the people over at the bar*
"Be nice now"
*Falls asleep again*
#1: Tsubasa is not like that
#2: Tsubasa is homosexual; he is in love with a young man named Jomei -- and if you cared to read my RP, you'd have known that
Edit: Oh, hullo Mister Leo! Could you get me a Cherry Coke, please? Thank you very much.
Tsubasa: You bastard! I'm gay!
Blorgulox: ...You mean... you are a flaming homosexual?
Tsubasa: Of course I'm a homosexual! I have a boner just from standing next to you!
Blorgulox: ... I was just kidding
Tsubasa: It's not funny! Now you shall eat my wrath!
*Tries to hit Blorgulox*
Blorgulox: *Word of God* Quick it! Now you will laugh and admit it was quite funny
Tsubasa: Heheheh... heh... good one!
*Tsubasa tries to hug Blorgulox but he gets out of the way*
Blorgulox: Get your hands off me! *Word of God* And lose that boner!
*Tsubasa goes limp*
Blorgulox: Now... this has been a traumatizing experience for me... nothing can ever fix this for me... except alcohol!
*fixes up a rum and coke*
Blorgulox: This is still quite incomplete though... To the Red Light District!
*Blorgulox leaves for the moment*
Narrator: And so, Blorgulox left on his quest, and would only return once his quest would be completed... This is the shittiest script in the world...
Revised Edit: If Tsubasa were really like that, that's probably what he would have done -- pretty funny stuff there ^_~
Thankfully, I have not read the RP rules, so I have an excuse. I won't use your char...sorry. Won't happen again... much. But I did play him well, all you had said was that he was a homosexual, nothing about his attitude though heh
Unfortunately, you're right...T_T;
I forgive you -- THIS time...
Edit: OK, I give you permission to use [b]Dark Tsubasa -- Tsubasa's flaming, horny, streetwise counterpart from some other dimension ^_~
*Leo walks up to the bar*
Leo: Hey can you get me a cherry coke please?
*Bartender gets a cherry coke*
Bartender: There ya go
Leo: Thanks
Bartender: No prob
*Leo walks to Tsubasa and hands coke*
Narrator: Meanwhile, blorgulox had gotten to the Red Light District and tried to get into a night club called the Bald Weasel.
*Blorgulox walks up to the guy at the front entrance*
Guy: Not so fast, are you on the list?
Blorgulox: Yes
Guy: What is your name?
Blorgulox: It is not important
Guy: Holy shit! It's Lord It Is Not Important! We thought you were coming later on tonight! Please, come in!
Blorgulox: Uh... ok
Guy: So, what are you looking for tonight m'lord?
Blorgulox: Is there a brothel nearby?
Guy: M'lord, those whores aren't good enough for you! Go into that room and take your pick
Blorgulox: Ok
Lord It Is Not Important: What the deuce is that bunny doing at my table? It isn't easter!
Guy: Shit! Get him! He's an imposter!
*Four guys with guns show up outta nowhere and start shooting at Blorgulox*
Blorgulox: *Word of God* Shove those guns up your asses
*The gunmen shove their guns up their asses... Including the one who had the rocket launcher*
Narrator: And so, Blorgulox defeated the gunmen by making them anally rape themselves with their weapons and he went and retrieved the whores... What a heroic moment... His quest accomplished, he was on his way back to the bar. But, on his way, he encountered something quite strange...
*Blorgulox farts*
Whore: god dammit...
*The whores sufficate*
Blorgulox: ...Shit
Narrator: Blorgulox proceeded back to the bar... whoreless.
O_o
:chuckle:
LMAO! LMAO!
Tsubasa: Who are you?
Dark Tsubasa:I'm your streetwise, flaming, horny counterpart from some other dimension, featherhead! *sighs* Damn! Where'd that bunny go? Wish he'd do that sex-zap on me again -- that was possibly the best orgasm I ever had!
Tsubasa: *eyes pop, jaw drops, makes incredulous gagging noises*
Dark Tsubasa: Hey, featherhead, I don't even have it in there yet and you're already gagging! What gives?
^_^
NiGHTS, Reala and Jackle walk in.
NiGHTS: So this is DV, I'm glad Reala stopped using me as a nick, now I can rule in my purple glory
Reala: Now he's using me. How can I be t3h red and black sex0rz now
Jackle: Fishsticks.
NiGHTS: What are you doing here?
Jackle: To RP, idiot.
Reala: Lets go to the red light district!
Jackle/NiGHTS: K
on the way there, they start a fight with Dark Tsubasa
Leo is drunk: FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!
*Without raising head from the table*
If you're going to fight then do it quietly.
Hey! Who ate my muffin? :mad:
*Blorgulox just gets back from the Red Light District*
Blorgulox: I'm quite sorry everyone... I am whoreless...
*As Dark Tsubasa and Reala are fighting, Blorgulox sits down at a table near them and starts weeping*
Blorgulox: God dammit.... he was so young... I think I killed him
Anonymous Voice: Yeah, I mis the whores too
Blorgulox: No! I'm talking about my dick! And I was clearly saying "he"... unless...
Anonymous Voice: Uh... you didn't know those were crossdressers?
Blorgulox: ...no... Thank God I killed them with my mega-gas!
*Dark Tsubasa and Reala are still fighting and kind of push Blorgulox's table*
Blorgulox: Hey hey! Clam down! Have some dip...
Dark Tsubasa: Hey, Bugs! My dick's starting to go limp around all these fugly straightboys! Work your magic, eh!? *sighs* Wish there was a district for me -- hey, maybe if I piss enough people off I can get sent to the slammer! Heh, that's not a bad idea! I hear the sex is like clockwork in there!
blorgulox: Hey Dark Tsubasa, can I have permission to be you?
Dark Tsubasa: Meh... yeah sure, why not... I'm an anus! look at me! I LOVE YOU MOM!
Blorgulox: Excellent.... muahahahahah....
Dark Tsubasa: Damn you Rakkantekimusouka! How could you give HIM permission!
Blorgulox: Silence! Now, get on four legs!
Dark Tsubasa: No!
Blorgulox: *Word of God* Do it!
*Dark Tsubasa gets on four legs*
Blorgulox: Now, I am going to ride you, my little horsie
Dark Tsubasa: What!
*Blorgulox rides Dark Tsubasa*
Dark Tsabasa: Heheheh... what part of me are you going to ride?
Blorgulox: you bastard! I'm the guy who makes the sexual jokes around here!
*Blorgulox slaps Dark Tsubasa on the face with a glove*
Blorgulox: I challenge you to a duel!
Bartender: Now now guys... We don't want any...
Narrator: Before the bartender could finish talking, Dark Tsubasa had already shoved his head up his ass*
Bartender: Gaaah!
*The bartender runs through a window*
Dark Tsubasa: Bring it on bitch!
Blorgulox: indeed... but before we start.. .pull your pants up
Dark Tsubasa: No! Never!
Blorgulox: Alright then, I guess I'll take mine off too... pants are so overrated!
Bartender (After getting his head out of his ass): Could you spare me some preperation H?
Blorgulox: All I've got is anal lube, sorry pal
Dark Tsubasa: I've got some, along with anal lube... I always carry some on me in case of emergency anal sex!
Blorgulox: I like anal sex, it feels good don't it?
Dark Tsubasa: Yeah, although my ass does get sore after a while...
Blorgulox: ...Seriously, you need help
*A girl walks in*
Girl: Who ordered warm apple pie?
Dark Tsubasa: Oh oh! I did! I did!
Girl: That'll be five bucks plus tip
*Dark Tsubasa hands her a 7$ bill*
Dark Tsubasa: Keep the change
Blorgulox: DEAR GOD!
*Dark Tsubasa inserts his @#!$ into the pie*
Dark Tsubasa: Now that's American Pie!
Blorgulox: Get your fingers out of there!
Dark Tsubasa: Sorry, I like putting my fingers into the pie before eating it...
Narrator: Heheh... I got yeh! I wonder what you thought the censored word was you naughty little boys... Oh yeah, and they put their pants back on... don't get any ideas.
:laughtillhurts: :bravo:
Tsubasa: *stares at his streetwise, flaming, horny counterpart in awe, eye twitches*
O_o this is just getting dirty, i'm outta here.............
Strange Voice from the Abyss: O_o This is just getting dirty... I'm outtah here
Blorgulox: ...Was it something I said?
Dark Tsubasa: The strange voice was right... I'm gonna go take a shower
Blorgulox: Yeah... I think I will too, that strange voice said it with so much awe...
Dark Tsubasa: Why don't we shower down together?
Blorgulox: Never... but I assure you, whoever does shower with me will need a cigarette right afterwards...
Dark Tsubasa: There seem to be less and less people showing up at this bar lately... only that Stalker guy who's sleeping and those three that hang around Reala... and Tsubasa, are here
Bartender: You are right... I think it's closing time
Blorgulox: I disagree
Bartender: Oh yeah? what time do you think it is then?
Blorgulox: Happy hour!
Bartender: I just realised something... no one here has actually paid for any of their drinks
Blorgulox: What are you talking about? *Secretly whispers to Dark Tsubasa* Get the tranquilizer...
*Dark Tsubasa shoves a horse tranquilizer right into the bartender's chest*
Bartender: Woah... My hand... It's so big.... wooow deeewwd
Blorgulox: That's he stuff... What's your name bartender?
Bartender: It's Steve dewd...
Narrator: The gang had made a new member... but what journey would they go on next? Unfortunately, none, because Steve decided to put his hand through a paper shredder and chopped the other one off with a chainsaw, he then fell off a cliff into a ditch, eventually having his legs eaten by a wild pack of leopards, he managed to crawl up a tree... little did he know that it was only 2 meters high... the leopards were scared away by a pack of satan worshipping cannibals that then attempted to dismember the rest of him, they managed to get the rest pof his arm, but he escaped by pouring boiling soup on them... long story short, a few days later he was found with a gorilla... doing stuff... yeah...
:shakehead2:
Please let's get this out of all the sex stuff?
please?
I agree, this was somewhat fun in the beginning, but noew it's just me being an immature bastard... not that there's anything wrong with that :mrgreen: But I think we should make a new game, and not some ripoff of Cheers that only takes place in a bar, something different...
Reala: Reala is t3h ub33r s3x0rz.
NiGHTS: Quiet you! We don't do sex here anymore.
Jackle: Then what can we do?
Reala: Go round killing inocent people?
NiGHTS: Sounds cood to me.
Jackle: HEY, EVERYONE! WE'RE GOING TO KILL INOCENT DV MEMBERS! WANNA COME!
NiGHTS: I thought it ws inocent people, not DV members.
Jackle: So sue me.
"This place is getting way to immature for me. I'm going to sleep until it improves"
*Goes upstairs and falls asleep in one of the small rooms there*
Tsubasa: *looks around* I don't feel right sitting here -- and I'm so very tired, a nap would be wonderful now.
*goes upstairs and enters a small, empty room, lays down* This bed is so fluffy! It's so comfy and cozy! Mmm...
*kicks off sandals, and gets under covers, wiggles toes* These sheets feel so nice and clean...
*mumbles as he drifts off to sleep*
*Leo feels tired too, he walks upstairs and accidentaley walks into Tsubasa's room and wakes him up*........
Blorgulox: Hmm... It seems that everyone is going upstairs...
*Blorgulox goes upstairs, suspecting everyone was having an orgy and then he walks into a small room in which Stalker is on the floor and Leo is in the process of awakening Tsubasa*
Hmmmm.... did't i burn this place, ah no matter.
AS the owner of this extablishment, FREE BEER FOR EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tsubasa: Whaa -- who's there? Oh, it's just you, Mister Leo...
*sees Blorgulox, shrinks down a little in fear* Oh, h-h-hello there, Mister Blorgulox...
Dark Tsubasa: *walks in behind Blorgulox* Hey, it's the featherhead! *grins* Let's all teach my wimpy counterpart the meaning of orgy! I call his ass first!
Leo: O_o Oh God not again! *exits*
EDIT: On second thought, i might join in :D
*Blorgulox sees Dark Tsubasa coming towards his anus*
Blorgulox: Hey hey hey! One at a time fellas...
Dark Tsubasa: Don't mind if I go first!
Blorgulox: I was just joking, weren't you?
*Dark tsubasa blinks constantly at Blorgulox for a while*
Dark Tsubasa: Uh... maybe
*Blorgulox steps back slowly and runs right out the door*
Leo: Finally now Blugorox has gone we can party!!
*dances*
*Blorgulox hears that and slowly coems back in, he then sneaks up on Leo and kicks him in the ass just to piss him off*
Blorgulox: You shouldn't mess with me! ruh roh... I shouldn't've done that...
*Blorgulox uses his mind powers to move time back and then he sneaks up on Leo and makes him shove his head into his ass and then shit his pants*
Blorgulox: Bon appetit!
Dark Tsubasa: Haha -- serves the little pisser right! Hey, Blorgy, can we get to the orgasming now? I haven't had sex in over ten minutes! *in playful tone* Open wide!
Blorgulox: Dewd... quit the gay stuff, I don't swing that'a'way!
Dark Tsubasa: Well... what if I get a vasectomy?
Blorgulox: ... No... but I'll perform a free vasectamy for you if you want, just that I dunno where the tube is and I'm all outta horse tranquilizers.
Dark Tsubasa: ... I'm a massochist
Blorgulox: No problem then
*Several pain filled hours later*
Blorgulox: Found it! This pizza slicer is pretty good for cutting...
Dark Tsubasa: ...... gahvsvd....
Blorgulox: Alright, lemme just cut the tube
*Blorgulox cuts the tube and then blood start wooshing out of his crotch*
Dark Tsubasa: GAAAAACCKK!!!?!???!!!!!!
Blorgulox: woops.... I forgot the tube was inside your body, not outside...
*BLood squirts all over Blorgulox*
Blorgulox: Oh well, you'll just have to do with this, I don't think you will have any problems with pregnancy now...
*Blorgulox quickly exits through a window and re-enters the bar from the main entrance while Dark Tsubasa is still there, squirting like a little prick*
Blorgulox: Excuse me, bartender, can you sharpen an axe?
Bartender: ...
Narrator: His mission accomplished, Blorgulox was satisfied. Although he completely forgot about Leo... and he's still in the room...
*Leo draws his sword*
Leo: I have shit on my head! That's it he's gonna die!
*Leo runs towards Blorgulox and drives his sword through his neck, slicing it apart*
Leo: Hehehe :D
Dark Tsubasa: DAMNIT! Oh wait, I'm a demon, I can heal myself *heals up wound* There. Hmm...oh well, I guess Bugs is a no go after all. *looks at Tsubasa* Hey, I've still got the featherhead! C'mere, featherhead! *walks toward the bed*
*Blorgulox starts bleeding all over the place*
Blorgulox: Ow... that hurt, you are so mean Leo!
*Smears the blood all over Leo*
Blorgulox: Anyone got a tissue?
Blorgulox's neck: Spluuurrrttttt squirt
Dark Tsubasa: Narly!
*Starts to walk around uncontrollably and then falls down the stairs*
Blorgulox: ow! d'oh d'oh d'oh....
Dark Tsubasa: Don't forget your heavy stick!
*Dark Tsubasa throws the heavy stick down and it enters Blorgulox's chest*
Blorgulox: God dammit!!!
Dark Tsubasa: Sorry...
*Gets up and walks to the bar*
Blorgulox: Gimme a whiskey sour
Bartender: Coming up... you need some help with your bleeding?
Blorgulox: Nah, I'm ok
*Trips and falls on his chest where his stick was sticking out, it goes through his body, flies up in the air and enters his arsehole*
Blorgulox: aaaaahhh!!!! Get it out! Get it out!
Dark Tsubasa: Don't worry, I'm cuming!
Blorgulox: No! Not him!
*Dark Tsubasa goes downstairs and tries to take out the stick, after several tries, he gets tired and leans on the stick*
Blorgulox: God dammit!
*Takes Leo's sword out of his throat and uses his mind powers to teleport it into Leo's rectum*
Blorgulox: Have fun...
Narrator: I think I shit my pants!
O_o owch! *taks out his sword*
Leo: OK this needs some cleaning
*goes to bathroom and washes it*
Leo: Done! :) Now thats ot Blorgulox, you're goin' down!.... wait a minute you should be dead?
*Blorgulox dies*
Leo: :D Yay!!!!
*dances*
Leo: OK then lets have a partaaaay!!
*turns on music and starts dancing*
Tsubasa: Ohhh...*faints, falls back on the bed*
*turns off music*
Leo: Tsubasa? *walks to bed* Are you alright? What happened?
Blorgulox: Um... I'm not dead
Dark Tsubasa: I've already called the morgue, their cuming for you
Blorgulox: For me? Oh great... the girls I wanna fuck don't cum for me, but the morgue people will?... I'm not dead!
*Two guys from the morgue enter*
Guy #1: Alright sir, lie down
Guy #2: Yes, we wouldn't want you to be damaged goods, were gonna take out your organs
Guy #1: Yup...
Blorgulox: But I'm not dead!
Guy #1: now now sir... you can't talk, you are dead, we'll just pretend that that was air escaping from your body
Guy #2: Yup...
Blorgulox: But I'm not dead!!!
Guy #1: Yes you... hey waita minute... he really isn't dead!
Dark Tsubasa: I'll slip you a twenty if you just admit he's dead
Guy #1 and #2: Done
Blorgulox: No! I refuse
*The two guys take out their tasers and use them on Blorgulox*
Guy #1: Alright, put him on the table, were gonna take his pancreas
Guy #2: Yup...
Blorgulox: No! No!!!
*Takes his stick out of his body and hands their asses to them*
Guy #1: Hmm... alright, let's fight!
*Long kung fu scene here*
Guy #1: Crap... the good guy always wins...
Guy #2: Yup...
Guy #1: I mean... when will we ever win?
Guy #2: Yup........
Guy #1: I agree
Guy #2: Yup..................
Guy #1: My mom's gonna be so disappointed...
Guy #2: Yup.............................
Guy #1: And my dad will spank me...
Guy #2: Yup............................................... .................................................. ............................................
Blorgulox: *Word of God* You two, go and perform bukkake on Leo... and do that thing they did to him in Lethal Weapon 3...
Guy #1: One of those ass search things?
Blorgulox: *Word of God* Yeah... and maybe some goatse... Try to turn him into a fag too
Dark Tsubasa: Like Tsubasa?
Blorgulox: Yeah... that fag
Dark Tsubasa: Oh...
Blorgulox: You showered with him didn't you...
Dark Tsubasa: yeah... but it doesn't matter because we fucked for 4 hours straight afterwards
Blorgulox: Geez! Homo's get around!
Leo: O_O Crap.... *runs*
Leo: Hey wait a mo, i have powers :P
*shoot brainwave powers at the 2 Guys, Blorgulox and Dark Tsubasa, throwing them out of the bar and crushing them on a field, and then they bounced up into a pylon, electricuting them. Then they go flying off a cliff. They then get caught by a pack of hungry wolves and some cannibals. They are then eaten and killed. The rest of their bodies eventually rot and disintegrate in the hot sun*
Leo: Ooooo :D Yey!!!
*dances*
*Blorgulox uses his mind powers to go back in time to the part where Leo is about to use his powers and does that to him*
Dark Tsubasa:, you freakin' jerk! *gasps* Whoa! Hey, if you don't, I sure do! *Groans contentedly*
Query: How can you go back in time if you're dead?Quote:
Originally posted by Gezus
*Blorgulox uses his mind powers to go back in time to the part where Leo is about to use his powers and does that to him*
*ontopic*
Leo: O_O Oh God that ... that.. that, feels good :D
>Off-topic<
...because he's Blorgulox, and he's the closest thing to god this forum ever saw. Hehehe, how's that, Gezus?
Anyway...
<On-topic>
Dark Tsubasa: *Moans contentedly, repeatedly* Damn, you're like silk! *Moa* Wow! I should have been bugging you this whole time, instead of old Bugsy! *Moan* Damn! *whispers in Leo's ear* I'm a demon -- I can do this for the rest of eternity if ya like, heh...
Tsubasa: *Twitches and mumbles something, but doesn't wake up*
*Realises Tsubasa, uncoscious and releses himself from Dark Tsubasa's clutches and then goes to Tsubasa to see if he's alright..*
Leo: Tsubasa? Tsubasa? Are you alright??
Hello strangers! My name is Truthbea....*dies*
:laughhard:
roflmao
EDIT: *100th post*
Dark Tsubasa: *Stares at Truthbearer's corpse, shrugs* Hey, I'm not a necrophile by nature, but hell, as long as I can keep my lil' trident stiff...*goes down on Truthbearer*
Tsubasa:*eyelids flutter, mutters in low voice* M-Mister...Leo? *opens eyes slowly* Oh, it's you...*smiles* I'm alright -- I just got a little dizzy...
Leo: OK ^_^ I'll just go and fight them lot...
*Goes off to fight*
*Comes slowly round the corner and makes police noises*
Leo: Put your hands up in the air!!
*revives just in time to eat himself before he became damaged goods*
Leo: *Walks round the corner and grabs Dark Tsubasa*
Leo: Bitch! *slaps round face* :P
Leo: I shouldn't have done that. *steps back*
>Off-topic<
Grabs him where? Wait -- nevermind, I'll take care of that ^_~
<On-topic>
Dark Tsubasa:! *slaps Leo's hands away from his waist*
Tsubasa: *sits up, shakes himself awake a little, looks up* Oh, Mister Leo! You know that my Dark self and I are opposites, right?
Dark Tsubasa:
Tsubasa: *looks into Leo's eyes, winks*
Leo: so all we have to do is make him...... laugh?
"Or cut off his genitals" Says a voice from above
...or not :P
Dark Tsubasa: I ain't laughin' and I ain't getting my nads cut, neither! I'm outta here!
Tsubasa: *lowers eyebrows* I don't think so! *grabs his tail*
Dark Tsubasa:!!!
Tsubasa: Now, Mister Leo!
*Starts dancing around funy like and then advences up to him and tickles him and then gets some scissors and cuts his...you know... off :P*
>Off-topic<
Scissors? :eh: Um...you have one of those, don't you? I don't think scissors would cut it -- literally.
<On-topic>
Dark Tsubasa: GAAH! *falls to his knees, snarls at Tsubasa* DAMN YOU!!! *chokes and spasms, falls over, twitches*
Leo: yey! now all we have to do is get rid of Blorgulox :D
Voice from above: "HA HA"
*dies*
Leo: Hmm i guess Borgulox has gone, PARTAAAY!!!
*A dimensional rift opens out from nowhere and then Light Leo comes out from nowhere*
Leo: Who are you?
Light Leo: I am Light Leo. You're good oppsite in everyway from another dimension :)
Leo: I'm evil?
Light Leo: No it's just I'm better than you
Leo: h......
Light Leo: See, you miss out everything and I am perfect :)
Leo: What did I d?
Light Leo: You missed an 'O' out.
Leo: hhhh... My '' keys stuck ¬_¬
>Off-topic<
Ummm...OK, WTF?
<On-topic>
Tsubasa: *Stands up* Oh, hullo there, Mister Hikari Leo! *bows* Pleased to meet you! *laughs*
*Stares blankly into the sky and has been for the past ten minutes, wakes up*
Blorgulox: I am a new bunny! I am not bad anymore!
*Sees Light Leo*
Blorgulox: ...
Dark Tsubasa's genitals: Flop Flop
Blorgulox:........
Dark Tsubasa's genitals: Flop FLop Flop
Blorgulox: .............
Dark Tsubasa's genitals: FLOP! FLOP! FLOP!
*Dark Tsubasa's genitals explode, resulting in a big shower of a sticky liquid*
Dark Tsubasa: God dammit...
*Other weird portal to another dimension opens and Light Blorgulox jumps out*
Light Blorgulox: Hello there Blorgulox, I am your opposite in every...
*Blorgulox shoves Light Blorgulox back into his protal while it is closing*
Blorgulox: Oh no you don't!
*Kicks him a few more times to make him fit and the portal closes*
Blorgulox: That sucked... Light Leo sucks... and Dark Tsubasa isn't Tsubasa's opposite in every way, their both homos
Dark Tsubasa: Damn right, but I also fuck chickens
Blorgulox: That's great...
*Takes a shite on Light Leo*
Blorgulox: You deserved that, your aura clensed my soul for a moment there... that was so scary... Get off my leg Dark Tsubasa!
Dark Tsubasa: Sorry... I couldn't help it...
Blorgulox: You're getting blood all over my pants!
Dark Tsubasa: I guess I'll start menstruating now...
Blorgulox: You do that...
*Steps back and runs out the door, he then uses his mind powers to make time turn back and make him reappear in the room, he does this several times*
Blorgulox: Weeee!
Dark Tsubasa: Godamnit! *opens portal* I'm heading back to my own dimension to heal -- but I'll be back! *shakes fist at Tsubasa* I'll be back, and then I'll make you pay, you little --! *portal closes with him inside*
Tsubasa: *blinks* I hope it takes him a while to heal...
Five minutes later
Dark Tsubasa: I'm baaaaack! And now you're gonna get it, you little jerk! *lungs at Tsubasa, grabs him by the wing and wrestles him to the floor*
Tsubasa: Yaaaah! *fights back*
Dark Tsubasa: *pins Tsubasa on his belly, maniacally grabs the waist of his pants and yanks them down*
Tsubasa: Noooo! Leave me alone!
Dark Tsubasa:! And when I get pissed, I get horny! And when I get horny, I get pissed! And when --
Tsubasa: ¬_¬ Enough already!
Dark Tsubasa:*blinks* ¬_¬ OK, featherdick, you just got yourself a redbelly!
Tsubasa: Noooo! Not that! Anything but that! Mister Leo, HELP!
Dark Tsubasa: *pushes Tsubasa over on his back and lifts up his shirt, and starts forcefully slapping his stomach with the palm of his hand* Take this! *slap* and this! *slap* AND THIS! *really hard slap*
Tsubasa: Itai! Itai! ITAIIII! *eyes well up* MISTER LEO! ANYONE! HELP MEEE! *tries to kick DT off of him, but DT is kneeling on his shins*
Dark Tsubasa: You're not getting away this time!
Tsubasa: *his stomach grows hot and looks darker where it's been slapped, a tear escapes his eye, then the other, then he begins to cry*
Leo: Oh NO!! He's crying Blorgulox ¬_¬ I can't believe i'm saying this but help!!
*Leo walks up to DT and Tsubasa and tries to push DT away*
Leo: Blorgulox, make Tsubasa laugh!!!!!
Leo: Seriously, I can't wait any longer.....
Light Leo: I'll help!
Leo: No!
*Light Leo swoops down and tries to knock over DT but instead knocks over Leo*
Leo: Shit..
*portal opens*
Hi, I am the light truthbear... *dies*
*eats himself pre-emptively*
Blorgulox: Dark Tsubasa... get off of him
Dark Tsubasa: Fugoff!
Blorgulox: *Word of God* Get off of him now!
Dark Tsubasa: no!
Blorgulox: What? But I used the word of God!
Dark Tsubasa: I wasn't listening! I have a short attention span!
Blorgulox: Noooo!!!
*dies*
Dark Tsubasa: Muahahah!
*revives*
Dark Tsubasa: Shite...
Blorgulox: *Word of God* Get up Thruthbearers!
*revives Truthbearer and his light self*
Blorgulox: You bloody bastard...
*Takes out heavy stick and beats the shit out of Dark Tsubasa with it*
Dark Tsubasa: Gack!
*Dark Tsubasa tries to break the stick, only to find out it broke his nuts*
Dark Tsubasa: I thought I had lost those previously...
Blorgulox: They regrew...
*background music by Rammstein suddenly starts playing*
Blorgulox: Du hast me?!
*rams his stick into Dark Tsubasa's scalp, going all the way thourgh, cutting him into two pieces*
Dark Tsubasa: Shite!
*Dark Tsubasa climbs to his legs, up his body and tries to smack Blorgulox in the face, only to hug him*
Blorgulox: Du riechst so gut!
*A protal to another dimension opens and Light Light Blorgulox steps out*
Light Light Blorgulox: I am the even more opposite of Light Blorgulox! That means I'm exactly the same as you because I'm the opposite of your opposite!
Blorgulox: Prove it...
Light Light Blorgulox: ... No... Go fuck yourself sideways with a splintery wooden dildo
Blorgulox: Holy shite! It really is him! But there can only be one...
*Shoves Light Light Blorgulox into Dark Tsubasa's gaping anus*
Dark Tsubasa: What a colourful enema!
Truthbearer and his light side get up and look at each other.
Truthbearer: Hey, I was happy being dead!
Light Truthbearer: I'm off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz!
Truthbearer: What the fuck, dude? Could you be any gayer?
Light Truthbearer: For the last time, I am not gay...I am just light
Truthbearer: ...and by light you mean you like to get humped in the ass?
Light Truthbearer: What the frick? How dare you...I shall....spite you with my magical dust!!!
Truthbearer: Magical dust....right... *shoots light truthbearer in the head*
Have that bitch!
*light truthbearer dies, and is immediately eaten by a squirrel*
Truthbearer: ok, time to go spread the truth around for a while... and by the way, dark tsubasa or whatever the fuck you are called, stop trying to hump my dead body, please. I mean, can't you find any lonely sheep that want to play with you? Next time that happens I will have to come back to life just to make you eat your own genitalia, eventhough I see you don't have any anymore....
Oh, and Leo... you should go, I hear that your mother is about to crap herself and she needs someone to change her diaper...
And Blorgulox...what the hell kind of name is that? Was little Ms Pony already taken? Ack...I am deeply annoyed by everything and everyone...I will just go and try to defy the laws of gravety and fly for a couple hours
*a couple of hours go by of Truthbearer just jumping with his arms up like an imbecile*
*Stares blankly at Truthbearer*
Blorgulox: You are right... This name is quite lame... Miss Pony was taken actually... Globulox might've been a better choice...
*An armadillo randomly jumps out of nowhere onto Truthbearer*
Dark Tsubasa: Yay! Another animal to sodomize!
*Dark Tsubasa comes up to the armadillo and...*
Leo: Oh God, please don't do that, no.. no NO!!! God that doesn't look a good sight *noises in the background*
Leo: *looks away*
Dark Tsubasa: What?
*Dark Tsubasa continues to pet the armadillo*
Blorgulox: You dirty little boy Haz... I mean... Leo...
*Truthbearer eats soup*
Leo: T_T; [b]Dark Tsubasa? I wanna fight, lemme fight! Fight!Quote:
Originally posted by Gezus
Dark Tsubasa: What?
*Dark Tsubasa continues to pet the armadillo*
Blorgulox: You dirty little boy Haz... I mean... Leo...
*Blorgulox steals soup*
*Dark Tsubasa takes a piss in some random lady's perfume and then she puts it on*
Dark Tsubasa:! *grins evilly* And once my horny batteries recharge, I'll fuck your brains out and use your hide for soup! *sniffs the air* Yep, nothin' like a litle eau de Yami Tsuba to spruce up the place!
Leo: *throws sword at [b]Dark Tsubasa* Tee hee :D Did that annoy you?
Dark Tsubasa: *catches sword without looking up, throws it back at Leo* Is that the best you can do, you little Pond Brat?
*Leo's sword hits Blorgulox, causing him to fall and drop the boiling hot soup onto Leo's crotch area*
*Dark Tsubasa gets some instand fondue and starts dipping*
Dark Tsubasa: I thing this armadillo is lonely...
*Dark Tsubasa's eyes light up in an evil way as he winks at the armadillo*
Armadillo: The fuck I'm getting anally raped by you!
*The armadillo spills the fondue into Dark Tsubasa's anal crack, lights up a cigarette, and leaves*
Blorgulox: ... This is awkward
*Dark Tsubasa licks the soup off Leo*
Leo: O_O Stop licking me! *hits DT aroung the head*
Dark Tsubasa: Did I ever tell you that you're mighty tasty, Liono? Heh! Hey, now it's your turn! *grabs Leo by the scruff of the neck and holds his head up to his ass* Lick me, Pond Brat!
Leo: Why would I wanna? :P
Blorgulox: Heheh... hey Leo, are you being forced to lick a tunnel? I thinlk the train is coming.
Dark Tsubasa:! And hurry up! I won't be able to get off if I'm taking a shit, ya know!
Leo: :chuckle: *hits DT around the head and then runs to the other side of the room*
Leo: Can i have a drink please?
Bartender: Whaddya want?
Leo: Anything, quickly
Bartender: There ya go *hands Leo drink*
Leo: Thanks :)
*walks over to DT and pours it over him and then throws the glass at him, causing him to bleed*
Blorgulox: He's right... hey, why the fuck am I sitting here watching this shit?
Dark Tsubasa: My ass gets you hot
Blorgulox: Don't ever speak to me about your ass getting me hot ever again... now I'm gonna go get loaded up on alcohol... go put your clothes on... go putr alot of clothes on infact...
*Puts popcorn down and shoves hit foot into Dark Tsubasa's anus*
Dark Tsubasa: You have big feet...
Blorgulox: Yes, but now you can't shite so you'll blow up
*Dark Tsubasa's guts start gushing out of his mouth*
*Uses his mind powers to make time turn back*
Blorgulox: There... now we're back where we were before
*Takes a shit into Leo's mouth and makes him swallow it by following it up with a shower of.... mouthwash, yes, mouthwash
Gezus can you delete that post please and do it according to mine please?
Thanks!
~Haz
Dark Tsubasa: cloeca.
Leo: O_O no! not me! oh god! *runs around in circles*
*Uses his mind powers to make time turn back for Dark Tsubasa too*
Leo: N..no...now look DT old pal lets just talk this over a drink.. he..heh? :undecided:
Dark Tsubasa: *blinks* Whoa...did everything just taste purple for a second? Meh...*looks at Leo* A drink, eh? Sounds good...*walks up and sits at bar* Bartender! Buffalo Sweat, and make it quick!
>Off-topic<
Buffalo Sweat is a shot that is 4/5 bourbon and 1/5 tabasco sauce
Leo: *hits DT over the head with a glass*
Dark Tsubasa: Hey! What the hell did you do that for!?
Leo: well, you said i should piss you off i wanted to fight.. so...
Dark Tsubasa: *blinks* I said what now? *blinks some more*
Bartender: Buffalo Sweat up! *slides glass across bar*
Dark Tsubasa: Well, whatever. *picks up shot and gulps it down* Yeaaahhh...love how it burns! Another! Another!
Bartender: *slides him another shot, and another...*
Dark Tsubasa: *gulps down twenty more shots* Whooooo....*wobbles on his stool* I feel like a baked iguana! Hehehehehe....
Bartender: You say you want an Iguana? *slides him another shot*
Dark Tsubasa: Cooool...*gulps it down* Fwoooooom....*laughs and babbles drunkenly*
>Off-topic<
Iguana is a shot that is 1/6 Kahlua, 1/6 Vodka, 1/6 Tequila, and 1/2 Sour Mix
Leo:*soliloquy* Hehehe now i'll be able to attack him when he doesn't notice
*attacks DT*
Leo: That must hurt...
*DT's head falls off*
Leo: :D
Dark Tsubasa: *bends over and picks up head, puts it back on his neck and seals the skin, turns to Leo and speaks slurredly* Listenman...youreallygottaloosenup...Imeanwhatwith allthistryingtokillme...nstuff...justnotrightman.. .whatsyerproblemanyway? Imeanyougottaproblemwithme...yougottaproblemwithme you...youtakeitoutbytalkinrwhateveryougotit? Imean...Imeanyougottalightenupman...Idontmeananybo dyanyharmyougotit? Nowlemmehaveanotherdrink...*turns back toward bar* Bartendergimmeanothershot! Makeit...whateversthebestyougot! Idon'tcarewhatyougot...itsallgood...youknowitsallg ood...
Leo: ok then :P friends? *holds out hand*
Dark Tsubasa: OkayI'mcoolwiththatletsbefriendsokaythat'scool...* reaches out several times before managing to grab Leo's hand, shakes it vigorously* CoolIgottanewfriend...ohmygodIamsodrunkrightnowheh ehehehe....
*Has a drink and eventually gets drunk*
Leo: Whhooaaa duuude lets have seeexx! liike deeewd!
Blorgulox: Amen to that! It's the first time I'm not drunk... *sob* Bartender! Give me a Sex of the Beach!
Bartender: Sure *Slides the drink on the bar, but Dark Tsubasa drinks it*
Blorgulox: Hey! Gimme another, and don't drink it DT!
Bartender: Coming right up! *Slides it, but once again, DT dirnks it*
Blorgulox: Gah!!! *Pushes DT out of the way* Another one!
Bartender: Coming right up! *Slides it on the bar, only for it to fall on the ground*
Blorgulox: Shite! I forgot to catch it! Another one!
Bartender: Coming right up! *Slides another one, only for DT to drink it again*
Blorgulox: GGGAAAVVVK!!!!! Alright, this time take a shit in a bowl of spinach, freeze it, un freeze it, cum in it, pour some of that liquid that'[s part lube part shit from anal sex into it, put some absynth in there, and gimme one of those!
Bartender: Coming right up! *Slides it down, only for DT to drink it...*
Blorgulox: Heheheh... Now give me a glass of Absynth
Bartender: Coming right up! *Slides it down and Blorgulox drinks it*
Blorgulox: mmmm... good stuff
Bartender: Woops, that was actually the spinach contraption...
Blorgulox: ... Fuck!
*Vomits all over DT and Leo*
Leo: Whoooaaa! Dewd!! like go have sex or sumthing!
Blorgulox: *after drinking several shots of Absynth and Bailey's* Wooahah! DEWD! Ride the vomit waves man!
*Uses his heavy stick as a surf board to ride the puke waves*
Blorgulox: Wow dewd!
*Penetrates through Leo with his stick*
Blorgulox: Sorry dewd... hey, blood waves!
*Uses his heavy stick to ride the blood waves now*
Blorgulox: Wow dewd!
*Penetrates through Dark Tsubasa with his stick*
Blorgulox: Sorry...
*Dark Tsubasa vomits*
Blorgulox: Tchah! More waves dewd!
*Continues riding*
Leo: *Revives himself* Whoah dewd?! do u love me or sumthin?
Dark Tsubasa: Ohhhman...Ihavegonethroughsomuchshittoday...Ikeepl ikebleedingandallthisshit...Igottagetoutofhereorso mething...butIdon'twannalosethebuzz...shitshitwhat doIdo? AhIdon'tknow...screwitman...justscrewit...*heals himself for the nth time that day*
*Gets off his stick/surf board*
Blorgulox: Hey... no one's having fun... did I ruin the party?
Dark Tsubasa: aw... donn wohrri aboot eet!
Blorgulox: That's awesome dewd... The Human Instrumentality project kicks ass... *vomits on Dark Tsubasa*
Dark Tsubasa: Aye!
*Vomits on Leo*
Dark Tsubasa: Queet eet!
*Vomits on the bartender*
Bartender: *smoking marijuana* Wow dewd... my hand... it's so big... It can touch everything in the world except for itself... *his hand trouches itself* Wooooooooooooow
*Vomits on Truthbearer and runs out, retrieves the armadillo from before, vomits on it, runs out, puts it back and comes back to the bar in a flash*.
Armadillo: .... did I just get laid?
*Suddenly, a pink camel wearing sunglasses and smoking a cigar comes in*
Pink camel: I am only a figment of your imgination, here to help you find your Personal Legend... You must go to the Pyramids of Egypt and find a...
*Vomits on the pink camel*
Pink camel: Narly! Screw you, I was gonna tell you about a treasure, but you got Paulo Coelho pissed, fuck you!
*Vomits some more on the pink camel*
Pink camel: ... *walks out*
*Truthbearer dodges the vomit Matrix style*
*Truthbearer gets a a crocodile which mauls on Blorgulox's genitalia*
*Truthbearer wonders who will pick up the bill*
*Truthbearer goes off to plan the fall of the capitalism system*
*Truthbearer is an ego maniac*
*An old looking man enters the bar quietly, noone notices as he sits in a table in the far corner of the bar. He has a glasseye and a long white beard, he seems to be wise... He suddenly takes out a small book and starts reading. His lips slightly move as he reads the first page... A waitress approaches him*
Waitress: What can I get you dear?
Leo: Huh, what? Nothing, thanks
Waitress: I wasn't talking to you
Leo: k.
Waitress: What can i get you (to Amaru)
Leo: NOTHING!
Waitress: *slaps Leo*
Leo: BITCH!
*Waitress tries to slap him again but he dodges, matrix style*
Amaru: Give me the strongest thing you've got
*Goes get drink*
Waitress: There ya go :) Anything else?
CRAP!!!! PENA HAS BEEN TAKEN FROM US!!! HE NEVER EXISTED! HE NEVER CAME TO BE!!!
I think this may just be an opportunity that was given to us to start over and erase Javier Peña from our mind...as sad as that seems. We had such great times together. Like, remember that time that he jumped out of Leo's stomach? Or when he ate Amaru's leg and kidney? Or when people tried to continually murder him unsuccesfully? Or when Amaru made that very reprehensible comeback to haz's statement that it was the most disturbing thing he had ever seen, by responding "Well, you should see him naked"
We had good times, but now we can take the plotline to somewhere completely different....or not.
Here's looking at you, Peña...
http://img159.exs.cx/img159/610/tombstone5mi.jpg
Rest In Peace, Javier Pena. We will never forget you
We had such great times together, even though they were painful..... oh well
Suddenly they fell back to the ground. They had been through a timeportal, and were right back to where the old man was.
All: WTF?! What happened?
Leo: It appears we went through a time portal, to an hour before? *goes up to old man and tries to pull mask off*
You need serious help man... way 2 obssesed with Peña :shakehead2:Quote:
Originally posted by Truthbearer
CRAP!!!! PENA HAS BEEN TAKEN FROM US!!! HE NEVER EXISTED! HE NEVER CAME TO BE!!!
I think this may just be an opportunity that was given to us to start over and erase Javier Peña from our mind...as sad as that seems. We had such great times together. Like, remember that time that he jumped out of Leo's stomach? Or when he ate Amaru's leg and kidney? Or when people tried to continually murder him unsuccesfully? Or when Amaru made that very reprehensible comeback to haz's statement that it was the most disturbing thing he had ever seen, by responding \"Well, you should see him naked\"
We had good times, but now we can take the plotline to somewhere completely different....or not. *
Here's looking at you, Peña...
says the guy with his pic as a wallpaper :roll:
anyway, it just wasn't meant to be...
*haz pulls off the old man's mask to reveal that he was indeed......an old man!!!!*
Old man: OUCH!!! Just cause my skin is old and soggy doesn't mean I have a mask on, you young hoodlum!
*starts to beat Leo with his cane slowly and weakly, till he falls asleep*
Leo: *wakes up* huh? wha?
[b]Dark Tsubasa: *looks up with his hand still down his pants, looks around, then closes his eyes again and goes back to masturbating casually* Mmmm...yeah...you like that, don'cha Blorgy? Ohhhh...
Tsubasa: *still lying under table, giggles in his sleep, rolls over*
(OT: whats up with you and your characters masturbating all the time? :shock:)
CT walks in, and orders a beer, and sits in a secluded corner away from all the commotion.
Leo: Hey! I know you, but I can't remember........................ hmmm......
>Off-topic<
DT is always horny like that...
Tsubasa: *talking in his sleep* Tickle him...Mister Leo...Tickle....CT...sides...
Leo: What? urm ok, wait... isn't that your turn on?
>Off-topic<
So...what? :D
<On-topic>
Tsubasa: *snores*
>Off-Topic<
:lol:
>On-Topic<
Leo: *tickles CT*
off-topic
we are all really immature in here
on-topic
Blorgulox: wazaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!
Dark Tsubasa: wazaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!
Random person: wazzzzzzzaaaaaaaaa!!!!!
Leo: *while tickling CT* wazzaaaaaaa!!
>Off-Topic<
What's it like when Tsubasa's horny? :hrm:
You know, even though Javier Pena no longer exists, I still didn't get my cat back..... That makes me kind of sad.
*starts to cry and soon the entire bar is covered in water*
*off topic*
here's my wallpaper... NEO
http://www.lexus.cz/images/wall-future-1024.jpg
*on topic*
Bartender: HEY HEY HEY STOP CRYING!!!
Leo: man these where new shoes, they're ruined now!!!!
>Off-topic<
Tsubasa's never horny -- that's why DT always is. Not to say that Tsuba couldn't be...aroused to say the least... ;) :D
Chris, is your last name Taylor?
no, it's tucker :lol:
P.S CT :goodjob2:
Funny, CT didn't look black when I saw him last...Quote:
Originally posted by Truthbearer
no, it's tucker :lol:
^_~
Edit: OMG is that really you, CT?
No no, wait -- the T stands for ticklish! Woo! ^_^
Yeah...I'm a tickle-fetishist...no point in denying it...
OK, now that we've had a moment of randomness for Javier, can we please get back to the on-topic senslessness?
Leo: Ame please stop crying *pats back* :)
Blorgulox: Stop crying Ame... I said stop crying! I guess I'll have to roshambo you to stop, I kick you as hard as I can in the nuts, then you kick me as hard as I can in the nuts, and the first one to fall loses, I go first
*Kicks ame square in the nuts*
Blorgulox: Huzzah!
*Leo goes to explore Dream Views Bar*
*Leo finds a door*
*Leo walks inside*
*Leo finds a finds restaurant*
Leo: O_O I dodn't know it was Dream Views Restaurant!!??
*Calls everybody*
Blorgulox, those were my pistachios! *stalks away angrily*
*sits down in a private booth and orders a slice of hawaiian pizza*
*Agent Smith comes into bar*
He copies himself into everybody and that is the end of the story
Agent Smith orders a coffee.
The other agent Smith orders a coffee too.
All the Smiths order some coffee. Black coffee.
THEN, ALL OF A SUDDEN, A VOICE FROM THE CROWD BOOMS "I'll have a latté please"
All the Smiths turn their heads towards in the general direction of which the voice seems to originate from, and gasp in terror
Its one of them, its an agent Smith.... IN A PINK SUIT!
Agent Smith: WTF?
Agent Smith: You are not one of us...
Agent Smith: What went wrong
Agent Smith: Purpose...
Pink Agent Smith: This was inevitable...I was the one that copied over Leo
Agent Smith: Not a problem...
Agent Smith: Your purpose
Agent Smith: ...is elimination
Pink Agent Smith: Never!!! *runs away like a girl*
:laughhard:
*looks around from her private booth and sees all the Smiths* Does that mean no one's bring me my pizza? Gosh!
*takes out a gun and shoots some random Smith* Stupid Smith.
*An unkempt cleric of indeterminate denomination enters a bar in the early nineteen-eighties. Subgenius pamphlet #1 is sticking out from behind a pack of Kool cigarettes in the pocket of his faded black buttondown shirt. As he waits for his mescal, he mutters to himself about the day he'd had, counseling first graders who's teacher had gotten into HIS private sacraments, and proceeded to read to them from William Burroughs. Still waiting for his drink, the padre takes out a tiny wooden pipe, fills it from a black leather pouch hanging around his neck, and disappears shortly after hitting it with a small torch lighter. He reappears in the Dream Views bar, his mescal in front of him, the way he likes it, worm & salt. The scene in the bar is surreal, to say the least, which is also the way he likes it. He lights a Kool.*
Hey Pinkie! Suit in the cleaners?
*Drinks mescal, orders another*
Leo: Hello there, unkempt cleric of indeterminate denomination! How are you?
I'm turning agave worms into butterflies. It's God's work.
*drinks a shot of mescal, blows into the glass, a butterfly climbs out of the glass & sits on the bar*
*offers Leo a go at the sacraments*
*One of the Smiths blows up and Blorgulox appears*
Blorgulox: I had to make a come-back somehow!
*Beats the other Smiths with the blown up Smith's arm*
Blorgulox: Take that you bastards!
*Reaches into a Smith's stomach and suffocates him with his pancreas*
Dark Tsubasa: What are we gonna do with this Smith?
Blorgulox: I dunno... he's all yours
Smith: Noooooooooooo!!!!
Dark Tsubasa: This is gonna be fun... come on up to my room
Smith: Never!
Dark Tsubasa: It is inevitable... blah blah blah
*Dark Tsubasa drags Smith up to the room, the bar then shakes madly and sawdust rains down on the first floor*
Blorgulox: I sort of regret it now...
Leo: What's that-....
*Sees DT come down with a happy expression*
Leo: Actually, I'm afraid to ask.