if/then game

I was looking something up in a dictionary and noticed that the definition for sodomy was "unnatural sexual intercourse." I promptly checked the publication date, which was '95. I thought, if that's the definition for sodomy in your dictionary, then it's probably time to get a new one.

and then I got the idea for this "game." (if it has already been done, then...shut up.)

very simple: the only rule is that your line must start with "if" (unless it has an "intro," see no. 1) and it must be followed by a conclusion. the conclusion does not have to start with "then" (see 4).

(1) Railroad crossing, railroad cars: if you can spell "that" without any Rs, then you realize this riddle only works verbally.

(2) if you've already heard that bird is the word, then I need not repeat myself.

(3) if you are a blue-eyed boy with a great body and perfect features, then can I have your phone number? :D
(3.5) if you can see this, then you've highlighted this text. why?
(4) if hell freezes over, some crazy shit's gonna happen.

anyway, I'm sure you guys can come up with cleverer/funnier lines, and I look forward to your replies.

If I played this game, then I'd be the first poster!

(couldn't think of anything funny, maybe something will come to mind... later. interesting game too, id like to see what comes of it)

If I can see 3.5 without highlighting the text, then nerve didn't use f3f3f6 like a bro. There's no hidden text here. Also The Game.

If i didn't know what you meant, then i would use google.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Abra

If I can see 3.5 without highlighting the text, then nerve didn't use f3f3f6 like a bro. There's no hidden text here. Also The Game.

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...

still don't get it. google failed me

yeah... google knows all...

NOT WEB SAVVY ANYMORE AHHHFUOAWHETR8I943560 +BANGING ON KEYBOARD LIKE MONKEY+

I'm getting old and technology is moving too fast for me, PLEASE FIX IT +freaking out+

If you're getting old, then technology is probably difficult for you.

what? hold on while I get my reading glasses...

wait...what was I reading? what is this? where am I?

If you're getting old, then...

Wait...I forget.

you guys ruined my fucking thread.

If you guys fucking ruined his thread, then I shall fucking ruin it as well!

No wait, I failed.

If at first you fail, then try and try again. Then stop. No point being a bloody fool about it.

If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.

BAM!

If this thread has failed, then what of the other failed threads that continue to fail?

If someone posts below me, they will die peacefully. Just kidding, it's going to be full of torment and overall bad stuff. If you caught this message, the torment does not apply to you and instead will go on the next unknowing poster, and so on and so forth until someone has the curse.

If I die peacefully, then I'm dragging Invader down with me.

If you'd paied attention, then you'd have noticed that he didn't say when you died, essensially promising that your death will be "pleasant" when it comes.. hardly seem to be something to drag someone down over.

if mario wasn't such a smartass, then DV will be a much more boring place.

that goes for everyone... *stares at YOU*

if (Dreamviews.Language == SPANISH) then
{
Dreamviews.Status = screwed;
}

If Desert Claw wasn't so awesome, then he'd be less awesome.

if you guys don't stop flirting with each other people might think you're gay.

^ I feel like I'm being sucked into that signature every time I see it.

If you stare at my sig, it will steal your soul.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by nerve

I was looking something up in a dictionary and noticed that the definition for sodomy was "unnatural sexual intercourse." I promptly checked the publication date, which was '95. I thought, if that's the definition for sodomy in your dictionary, then it's probably time to get a new one.

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Yes, because asses were made to have blunt objects stuffed up them right?

sure, just like people were made to watch television and eat genetically altered food made with chemicals out of plastic packages and wear condoms and send text messages and eat with forks and wear makeup and drive motor vehicles!

don't argue with me about what is and isn't natural, ok? you do plenty of unnatural things.

If you try to ruin this thread, Soros, then I will sodomize you.

Also, if someone highlights the text of my previous post, they will see that the joke was on Mario.

If I die a horrendous death full of torment, then I'm still taking Invader down with me.

If Invader sodomizes me then him and his family will die mysteriously in a unexplained fire (and i will donate a million dollars to the victims of the earthquake in Haiti.)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by nerve

sure, just like people were made to watch television and eat genetically altered food made with chemicals out of plastic packages and wear condoms and send text messages and eat with forks and wear makeup and drive motor vehicles!

don't argue with me about what is and isn't natural, ok? you do plenty of unnatural things.

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don't change the subject. Asses aren't made for having shit stuffed up them, that's just as unnatural as anything else. The dictionary/thesaurus was correct.

alright, we will look at it from another angle (and within the thread rules!):

if anal intercourse is unnatural, then why. do. we. find. it. in. nature?

(by the way, oral sex is "unnatural" too. do you have a problem with that?)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by nerve

alright, we will look at it from another angle (and within the thread rules!):

if anal intercourse is unnatural, then why. do. we. find. it. in. nature?

(by the way, oral sex is "unnatural" too. do you have a problem with that?)

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I really like this guy.

If I continue to post invisible protest messages, then the staff will continue to ignore me. (Quietly protesting the 10-character limit)

If Mario does not post if/then posts in this thread then nerve will sodomize him.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by nerve

alright, we will look at it from another angle (and within the thread rules!):

if anal intercourse is unnatural, then why. do. we. find. it. in. nature?

(by the way, oral sex is "unnatural" too. do you have a problem with that?)

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I dont have a problem with you people doing you thing, get married, kiss w/e i dont care u guys can have your rights. I just don't agree with pcing shit up and saying that it's natural.

Tell me did evolution design asses so things should be rammed up them?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Soros

If Mario does not post if/then posts in this thread then nerve will sodomize him.
I dont have a problem with you people doing you thing, get married, kiss w/e i dont care u guys can have your rights. I just don't agree with pcing shit up and saying that it's natural.

Tell me did evolution design asses so things should be rammed up them?

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If Soros continues to try and defend his shaky position, then Mario and nerve will ultimately defeat him.

You might have some difficulty explaining the prostrate gland....and bonobo monkeys. (Quietly protesting the 10-character limit)

If mario thinks asses were made to have shit stuffed up them, then he will be raped by a guy named Buba.

If Soros does not cave, then the entire gay community will stone him to death and/or sodomize him. Quietly protesting the 10 character limit.

If Soro belives that asses were made at all, then he's wrong.

^ beat me to it



Soros: if you don't gtfo my thread, then I will kick you so hard in your tight little virgin asshole, you won't be able to sit for a week! report your sorry trolling ass to the staff! :'D

If THIS shizzle is for real Then its FAIL!

If you give a mouse a cookie, then he will ask for a glass of milk
Favorite story evar <3

If HHH posts the title of an awesome book, then it will fill all of us with nostalgia.

Still protesting 10 character limit.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mario92

If HHH posts the title of an awesome book, then it will fill all of us with nostalgia.

Still protesting 10 character limit.

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Quote:

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Originally Posted by hellohihello

If you give a mouse a cookie, then he will ask for a glass of milk
Favorite story evar <3

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10 character my ass!

if you open your mouth and close your eyes, then you'll be in for a big surprise! :'D

I know this game didn't really take off but

if you eat fishsticks for dinner more than never, then you're white trash.

If I make a new avatar and sig, then people will have a tricky time identifying me.