Writings

[Shaelyn]

I am a, maybe what you could call a developing writer and I would love it if some of you could critique and edit some of my work. Now don't be too harsh please, keep in mind these are only rough drafts. Thank you and I really hope you like it or at least aren't too annoyed with it.

[Shaelyn]

I have never been in love. I have never had to expierence giving someone your everything, and putting your heart and whole in thier hands then having it taken away as if it never existed. I have never felt so strongly for a person that I would give up my life and my world just to never see them cry. I have never put my dreams into one future with one person and made everything I did a plea to make that future better then have to find out that the one that had my heart in the palm of his hands decided to burn it all down to the ground and drown the future we had. I have never had to wonder what it would have been like if he wouldn't have let go of all that we had and worked for, leaving me with burning wet cheeks and a hole in my chest where my heart dropped to the bottom. I have never had to work everyday to bring my heart back up to where it belongs knowing that it won't ever come all the way back up because it is blocked by an agonizing wall that won't let go, that throws images into mind everynight and day of the memories, only reminding me of what I can't have, torturing me with nightmares that not even the most wicked of monsters could top. I have never had to wake up crying because I saw your face in my once pleasureous dreams that have know become sorce of my neverending pain. I have never had to live with this kind of hurt everyday ... because I have never been in love.

[Shaelyn]

Insanity An insane man can write things of no meaning, yet still be an inspiration. I think... think that the world has no true meaning, so with his meaningless words, that insane man was holding the world in the palm of his hand. I must admire his senseless beauty. In truth he is more sane than any of us. We are just repeatative, only become what society needs us to be. What a brave fool, insanity is.

[Shaelyn]

Glass The cold statue like object thats left in my chest, is pure glass, and when you came from the pits of hell itself, to make my life a miserable mess, I questioned my sanity, because at every moment you weren't by my side, I heard the piercing screech of cracking glass, fill my body, and tear me limb from limb, but when you spoke your last goodbye, and I knew it was time to let go, that inanimant glass thing that was already still inside my lifeless chest, shattered into a million pieces.

[Shaelyn]

Fake Trust You lied when you said you trusted me? Thats why we ended up in this unforgivable position? Doesnt that defeat the purpose ... lieing about trust? You think your words have no effect on me but your wrong You think I was the one who was hiding things but your wrong you said that I could just move on but your oh so wrong. I have given up on life itself because you broke me to the point of shattering. Now Im the one who got the short straw because while your off with her I'm here ... neverending waiting for that message thats never going to come. Hope is what kills me every second hope that you might regret leaving what we had and as much as I try to destroy that innocent hope... it comes within my dreams... it tears at me with every closed eye. Thats why I spent so many sleepless nights cursing you and the gods above because I knew ... if I slept... my once pleasent dreams of you would become nightmares. Now I have come to understand that these dreams,hopes,and flash backs are all I have left of you so Ihave learned to love this bitter sweetness. I have forgiven you for taking my trust and throwing it back at me and realized that what we had wasen't fake ... what you had for me was.

[Shaelyn]

god? Innocent children die in the arms of thier mothers, Men cry out for what they cant provide, Young boys are taught to kill, Girls scream for the many loves they've lost, Hopes are killed dispite the reluctance, so where is your god now?

[Man of Steel]

Very nice, Shaelyn! Good emotion, though I would suggest working on shortening some sentences in "I Have Never Been In Love". Some are too long, and need better structuring.

[nitsuJ]

Very nice, Shaelyn! Good emotion, though I would suggest working on shortening some sentences in "I Have Never Been In Love". Some are too long, and need better structuring. I agree. How long have you been writing? You should definitely post once you've finished them all! Keep up the good work.

[ThePhobiaViewed]

Wow I really liked them, especially Insanity. They remind me of the philosophical wanderings that go on in my own mind lol. I don't believe in judging writing or music on what isn't there, people make what they want and put it on display so I'm not gonna tell you that you should have done this and that differently. I really like your thoughts and style. "An insane man can write things of no meaning, yet still be an inspiration." ^That line has far more meaning than I think a lot of people realize.

[Shaelyn]

Very nice, Shaelyn! Good emotion, though I would suggest working on shortening some sentences in "I Have Never Been In Love". Some are too long, and need better structuring. I agree too at the time I couldn't figure out how to do shorter sentences without it becoming too repeating. It was only a quick ten minute jot down I plan to work on it tonight or tomarrow.

[Shaelyn]

Wow I really liked them, especially Insanity. They remind me of the philosophical wanderings that go on in my own mind lol. I don't believe in judging writing or music on what isn't there, people make what they want and put it on display so I'm not gonna tell you that you should have done this and that differently. I really like your thoughts and style. "An insane man can write things of no meaning, yet still be an inspiration." ^That line has far more meaning than I think a lot of people realize. Thank you ... and yes, insanity is one of my favorites also. It was based on Edgar Allen Poe at first then it evolved into more.

[Shaelyn]

I agree. How long have you been writing? You should definitely post once you've finished them all! Keep up the good work. Thank you very much. I have been writing for about three years now. In between doing other hobbies that is.

[Shaelyn]

My Hell The hell that makes me cry, Is the same hell you put me in, The pitch black death that fills my heart, Is the death I wish you shall have. If you could only lose everything you have, everything you ever cared about, ever wanted, ever loved, and burn with each decieving remark you make, maybe just maybe, you might be in the same hell you put me in.

[Shaelyn]

The five Five steps overwhelm each of us … whether out of order or perfectly sequenced we all face each phase with an overpowering sense of emotion. Parting, for the time being, with you takes something out of everyone … some more than others. Believing is what keeps us strong…together we can not fail. Grief- webs of water glide across flaming cheeks, the swelling knot in your throat seeps ever so slowly into your heart leaving it empty as you cry out to the open sky. Clutching at the world and trying not to let go but in the same instant wanting to relieve your grip. Anger- building up like tsunami, ready to slaughter anything it its path. Clenched teeth, numb limbs, thudding to floor as you screech in the dead of night … ripping out every strand of hair and every inch of room inside your mind. Bargaining- spare her and take me, my soul is gone without that life anyways. Hushed tones deep in secrecy … I won’t tell. Vortex of time turn it around and return her to this empty world and take me to make it less agonizing. I beg on hands and knees for her just to be. Denial- it’s only a mere falsity … a never-ending nightmare. Dry the sodden eyes because the reason behind them is a lie. She’s here somewhere … it’s only a conspiracy or a cruel, wicked joke. I can not trust anyone because they are all lying through their teeth. Not real. Acceptance - I can not understand but I must see that she was not only taken from me. She’s better there than here. War and plague does not spread where she has gone … only bright and loving light that matches every fiber of her being. Her uniqueness was needed somewhere else. She’s there … but still here engrained forever in our hearts. We haven’t let go or forgotten but we will eventually come to realize that your beauty isn’t gone just moved for the moment. ( This was wrtten after my friends passing at age thirteen and revised when my aunt passed at age 23 ) RIP Christina Priest and Suzy P.

[Shaelyn]

Vacant Gone, like the birds that flutter inside me. My soul hasen't got any room left to stay. Vacuous interior. Only a disaray of muddled thoughts, without so much as a hint of emotion. Tears are worthless with nothing to cry over. So why do they keep seeping through my once dry eyes?

[Man of Steel]

Again, very good! Also, moved to Artists' Corner where it belongs. I guess I didn't notice it wasn't there last night. No big deal. Keep up the good work!

[Shaelyn]

Again, very good! Also, moved to Artists' Corner where it belongs. I guess I didn't notice it wasn't there last night. No big deal. Keep up the good work! Yeah I didn't notice .. hmm thank you.

[Shaelyn]

Wow, its been awhile since I have posted anything here. Might as well add some of the recent. Warning: It seems I have digressed a tad. Clouds Dissipating, when needed the most. Reengaging across a sky, letting the brightest darkness fall. An intangible haze, filling a beyond vast volume. Covering creatures, creeping continuously, conspiring below beings. Rolling, far past anyone’s expectations. Gone with the wind, nowhere to be found. Beautiful yet dangerous as the fog sets in. An irrevocable cycle, necessary for survival. Clouds... Like love in so many ways, reminds me of us.

[Shaelyn]

Beat Within I beat to a beat unlike any other, I pound like death, knocking on your door. I sing like sin, slithering silently through. I can't help but to vibrate, from pulsations of pure panic. I whisper like souls kept still for centuries. I hum like heavens, hovering above harmonious hell. I breath nothing but beauty into bustling boulevards, but it gets me nowhere because I dream like demons within and end up beating to a beat unlike any other.

[Shaelyn]

Blessed Burden Daunting prematurity, taunted with giddy confusion. Begging god to contravene, relieve me of my burden, but to isolate me from my minds escape, from my dreams only diversion, in the same instance the blessed creation of beautiful aspirations, would as well eradicate my bitter bliss. Delayed recognition of true desires, Too late to go back. Think always on what can never be. Try and try again. Fail. Wonder which one of us is at fault. Play a lonely blame game, with fear at the forefront of faith. Until life do us part from our minds trepidation.