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I had just typed this entry, but lost what I wrote. I don't have a lot of time, but I feel like this dream is worth recording so here I go again. This is just a part of the dream, I think, and I have approximated the dialogue as best as I can remember:

The subaquatic people take their seats in their vessel. They are seated around the outside perimeter of a circle, facing inward toward each other. Someone, a main character of the dream, is offered the chance to join them. In the end, he refuses, because it would mean becoming one of them and living underwater for the rest of his life. One of the people, a lady I think, looks at me and says:

"This one might join us."

I think about this. The scene has the bittersweet feeling to it that happens sometimes at the end of a story where people have come to love one another but now for some reason have to part. But I think to myself that maybe I actually could go with them.

"What about my family?" I ask. "Would I ever be able to see them again?"

It is explained that although I will become subaquatic like them, I could still visit the surface world wearing a type of 'diving' apparatus. So, I decide to join them.

The vessel starts to descend into the water. There is a somewhat maniacal seeming captain, who, I think, expects me to drown. The rest of the people are cheering me on, seemingly happy at my 'rebellion'. I have been promised an oxygen tank, but in the meantime I have to hold my breath. It might be a long time of not breathing, and I count the seconds as I hold my nose closed. I get up to somewhere around 30 seconds, I think. Then I either wake up, or dream that I wake up, wondering if I have been holding my breath all this time.

Side note: I had a dream in October of last year with a similar theme. A subaquatic woman wanted me to join her, possibly making me subaquatic as well. In that dream it seemed like it was supposed to be frightening, but I wasn't frightened. I felt an attraction to the woman, and thought that it might be worth the transformation.

I am with a few of my friends. It is nighttime and the moon is very bright which along with lanterns and streetlamps helps illuminate the setting. We are at a harbor. while very crowded and energetic during the day, is quiet at this time of night. it consists of at least 7 wooden stories of piers which are meant to accomodate enormous ships and small vessels alike. you can get around by climbing stairs and ladders between the stories. the piers are also directly connected to a vast labyrinth of shops and restaurants (mostly seafood). [I had the feeling I had been to this city in a dream from months prior. me and my husband had gone sightseeing and were looking for a museum which held the city's famous masks, ut we stayed on the surface level and were there during the day] Me and my friends are on one of the upper stories when we see a white and yellow [like the white and yellow from a previous dream] tiger which begins to chase us. we run to the lowest level while the tiger-demon shapeshifts to chase us down ladders and stairs. EVentually I lose sight of it and make my way very quietly down to the small boat to meet up with my friends again. we are all there and we begin loading onto the small wooden boat.

I was in bed with my husband and I was telling him about my twin sister who is an actress. The room looked just like our room irl. my twin played catwoman in the latest batman movie. [the perspective shifts to 3rd person of the movie im explaining] I was explaining to him that I am worried she is into some very evil things since if you look closely at the frames in the movie you can see some weird messages hidden. The perspective zooms in on one of the perfume bottles in catwoman's vanity titled 'I eat little babies'. It was housed in a very luxurious crystal bottle whith the lettering done in cursive gold imprint. The bottle was among many others on a glass shelf. She finishes getting ready for a gala that she and batman are attending. She is wearing a beautiful flowing gown but she still has her cat woman mask on. The gala is hosted in a large rococco ballroom and is quite crowded. they climb up some stairs which are supposed to contain some occult symbolism but I forgot what it was. [perspective shifts back to me explaining this to my husband] I am worried that the batman actor is leading my sister in a very dark direction. After I tell him this he is stone-faced which makes me worry that he is in on it too. He looms over me and grabs my side very painfully which wakes me up.

[i fall back asleep] .....

realize im dreaming and the dream falls into a white mist. I try materializing something by yelling out 'Dream, give me more clarity' and 'Dream, bring me my twin from the previous dream'. a somewhat human form appears but it is very hazy. I end up losing lucidity eventually.

.......

I am at work as a teaching assistant in the dream. The school is large with a modern, open floorplan. The classroom has a beautiful design where one wall is full of windows to the park outside, the opposite side is open to the hallway, and the cieling has a curved '~' shape. The kid's tables are arranged around a shelf where the kids can grab materials like paper scissors etc. I dont remember the situation too well. I wanted to grab one of the covers to a CD case since I needed it for something and I assumed it would be fine since the teacher had told me i can grab anything from the shelf. As i go to grab the case the teacher yells out 'No! do not take my cd cases!' ....... I am in the front office ready to clock out but one of the front office girls is having trouble applying to something using a PDF application. I tell her that she should be able to apply online using the school district's wesite. They have a 'jobs' page where you just have to fill your info in online. I tell her that is how i applied to my job and one of the older office ladies says she did the same.

Was in a dream where I was fighting a metal robot while being a high jumping metallic rubber band. I decided to run from it and run in to the darkness. I wanted to end my dream as I wasn't enjoying it. During the darkness when the dream faded I became lucid and realized I was waiting for the next dream to form. Once it did it was nighttime and I was in third person. I thought about positive things and sunlight. That's when a grainy sunlight came in to the background but wasn't good quality.

I ended up losing lucidity not too long afterwards.

I have taken a little hiatus from dream work, having a lot of things to do and also starting to get a bit lazy. I did have a lucid dream the other night. There was more to the dream, but here is the lucid part:

I realize that I am dreaming. I'm standing on a raised walkway above a watery area. I decide to jump out a nearby opening, either to fly or just to fling myself out for fun. I fall into the frozen water below, which isn't very cold. I try to levitate, and I might end up asking the guy that was in the dream with me to help me. I think he might help, and I float into the air. Then I make myself zoom backwards, really fast. It's like zooming out on a picture, or flying really fast. I fly a little ways, thinking that this is the farthest I have ever flown in a lucid dream (or something like that). I think I try to land at some point, angling my trajectory down toward the ground. Instead, I start going down a slope. Now I'm flying over a green, lush, mountainous terrain. I start wondering to myself if I should try to find the persistent realm I have been working on, but decide to stick to what is going on now since sometimes it seems to destabilize things if I try to change course without planning ahead. But it seems that I make the decision too late, and I start to lose the dream (or things fade away, at least).

+ strange pool table in hall [DS!!!!] cue, screwing on top, inspecting tip, small square uneven table, upset that nothing better's available

+ on bed in (CH parents' room?) with "our cat", another (not ours) cat comes, I call to it, it comes and I pet it , several cats in the room, I tell my kids about the new cat that came

+ something in a house, about people (man and woman?) in a room

Im not sure which dream came first chronologically.

Lucid- I dont remember what the dream plot was before getting lucid, but i was on a long and wide garden path during a sunny day and there were children running around playing. The main path was long (i couldnt see the end) with lots of smaller tributary paths at even intervals with square patches where flowers grew to chest-height. the hand-size stones that made up the paths were also square. I think I was playing a game with the children + i was my male twin. I didnt do a RC, i just noticed i was dreaming. Once i realized this, I looked around for something to explore and one of the kids started chasing me (in good fun). I ran but focused on the feelings of running-the ground beneath me, the wind flying past, etc to strengthen the dream. This worked ! but then my cat woke me up or the alarm rang idk.

...opened the door for my cat and then tried to sleep a bit more before my alarm rang....

non-lucid - dont remember much about this one but it seemed significant and was (sort of) about the book im reading. I was my male twin again. I think i was playing a game gone sour between me and 'my feminine' vs another person and their opposite (i dont remember if i was playing against the man or woman). The significant thing was that the longer 'my feminine' stayed with my opponent, the more she was turned against me. I remember her changing colors from my black and blue to my oppontnt's white and yellow (or the other way around idk). She didnt look like me so I wonder who she was supposed to represent.

+ basketball nobody can make a shot passing is hard feel weak and uncoordinated warming up with team plan is to make shots around the key team standing around the court warming up, low light indoors no features of the building noted, try to make a shot up close and can't, "nothing but net" but it fell short. Nobody makes a single shot.

+ in Ch.Dw's cube at work, I'm admiring his air freshener feel the breeze on my face, hear it, taste how the air is fresher, want one for my cube

+ work cubes, loud girl neighbor playing music/talk radio, she turns it down, not nearly enough, "No way, that's not gonna work," she's hostile to the idea of turning it off or using ear buds.

+ the young woman is changing the water filter cartridge on the large (standing freezer shape) water dispensor, puts it in backwards at first, it makes a very unpleasant sound chug-chug-chug, "IT'S IN BACKWARDS! BACKWARDS! BACKWARDS!" She changes it then I walk around to the front and dispense a glass of water and say "thank you!"

+ [vague] driving on/alongside a large truck/trailer need to hand something off?

+ in a bathroom, standing at sink, double sink, looking at the lines of liquid dispenser rubber-lined that run along the top of the counter emptying into the sink, I think about the angle it was done at to make sure that gravity will pull the liquid into the sink, I run my finger along the latex/rubber material of the displenser path and it is very pliable, like a soft caluk, wife L comes in (now it's double toilet) and I know she has to pee, it won't bother me, she sits down to pee and I turn around and sit down on the toilet right next to her and think "zabavno" ("funny/fun").

In this dream there is a clay-mation like city growing up into these weird 3D looking isoforms. You know, like an isometric grid, except there's clay structures like buildings, spirals, and chess pieces pushing up out of the clay. My perspective is from above scrolling downwards (like how you'd scroll a page down). My POV scrolls down to a part where things like bar graphs are forming out of the clay. I also see some double helixes near the bar graph rectangles pushing up. Then, a Morgan Freeman type narrator voice says, "We are determining all the possible disease states."

Then, I appear in an old large rectangular train station. It's also made out of clay or maybe old limestone, but at the same time, has many American colonial features, such as oak wood trim. I levitate up in the center of the station, so that my POV is right in the center of the open space. Then I hear the narrator voice again, he's like, "this is our monument..." - or something to that effect "and this is the maximum number of colors for the clock." There was a big old fashioned clock on the wall, but it wasn't very colorful, so I know it was not referring to the colors I was seeing there (mostly beige clay). I got the impression that it was the maximum number of colors that I could potentially see. Then he said something like, "That's the total possible disease states." And then the clay wall of the train station formed a big number on it. It looked like a marquee sign, but carved into the clay. The number wrapped around middle wall height on three of the four walls. The station was about two floors in height, but lacked a second floor, so where the second floor would start was the numbers wrapped around the wall.

Analysis: I got the impression that I was looking at some sort of analysis that was being run on us to determine every possible disease we could get. When I woke up, it got me thinking about our planet. I wonder if we could be lab rats that are being tested for our genetic fitness.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

Walking up an alley of a park with a younger sister or cousin. On arriving at a terrace where there is a restaurant, we are cut off by barriers and cannot pass, because Ronaldo has booked it to have a private lunch there and no one can go throughit. I am upset and try to go around, but then he arrives by car and also blocks my way. I try to just ignore and move on, but something happens and he ends up also taking a walk in the park, almost side by side to us. As I reminisce to my companion about this place and some memories from my childhood, I notice he is listening and curious to know more. He asks me something about a street ahead and I suddenly remember stuff about it and drag him along in my revisitation of the place. I stayed there in a pension for some time and as I remember more details, I basically offer him a tour to this small town. He totally abandons his lunch plans and just joins us for good. Then we pass by a small place I mention has great veggie food, very basic but delicious and I invite him to have lunch there with us. He makes a bit of a snarky comment because of the veggie food, but then is really surprised to see that it is a very simple place with locals and not some fancy modern joint and I see curiosity won. I swear to him he will not forget about this place, either he likes the food or not, just because it is so authentic. By chance my dad is there with my aunt Ana and other people. They are waiting in line because there are no seats. I join them waiting in line and Ronaldo says we don't have to because of who he is, certainly they'll get us some table. Of course people recognize him when he enters and talk about it and some are very welcoming to him, but those that are sitting and eating with friends and family aren't bulging for him to get a seat and the fact is there really are no tables. What people do is they rearrange the tables so we have an area where we can sit on the floor if we want. I am ok with it, but he is not and so we just leave and continue our tour outside.
My dad reminded me that not only we spent some vacation on this town, but that we own an old house on this street. I am surprised and can't remember that at all, but he says it is that small property that appears mentioned on the IRS form and somehow it makes sense to me. He says it's just a couple blocks away, so I go look for it. Spot some folks building up a new house in the place where I thought was ours, can't figure out which one it is, so then we return and keep waiting for a table at the restaurant. By now Ronaldo is definitely feeling the hots for me and he grabs me by the waist and grabs my ass and pushes me against a wall, about to kiss me. But then my dad suddenly appears and ruins the moment. Ronaldo goes get some air for a minute and my dad comes talk to me. I guess he must be really proud that I am snatching such a rich famous guy and indeed he is, but also makes some comment about his manners and I have to agree that he is not exactly being a gentleman with me. I am not sure how I feel about it.

Walking by a boardwalk by the sea, recognizing some places. Seeing them with so much detail and thinking I don't wanna go there, because it is a place from another dream I had one day and nothing good came out of it. Then realize I am dreaming and it is a very stable lucid. The first thing that comes to my mind is to summon Avalokiteshvara. I really don't know why that was my first thought, but I did. Unfortunately, I immediately get surrounded by a pack of menacing growling dogs like dobbermans and rotweillers and I have to climb over a wall to protect myself. They keep jumping at me, viciously trying to attack me and I realize they are the protection mechanism or agents that always come if you try to liberate yourself, or meet those who can help you with that. I hadn't met them in a while. Then I remember that they have no power over me unless I give it to them, so I point the palm of my hands at them and slowly push them away with a kind of force field that makes me untouchable. One by one, the dogs step down and leave. I keep walking down the boardwalk while repeating mantras and continue to call for the deity. Don't see it anywhere but some lady approaches me offering me t-shirts. I say no and she insists that I follow her. I feel she is up to no good and accuse her of trying to distract me. After insisting a couple times, she walks away but I keep an eye on her as she walks towards the ocean and stays on the sand at the beach nearby. Wonder if she may be a manifeststion of the deity inviting me to come along and I rejected her, but I don't feel it. She passes by me again and leaves a box on the sand. Some girl says this is a gift to me but I am still suspicious of her intentions, so I don't touch it. The box opens by itself and contains gold statuettes of what initially also look like deities, so for a while I think this might be a sign. But as I look closer, the statuettes represent just common people in sex acts, like one lady going down on another and a threesome where someone is banging another from behind. Don't know what all of it means, but I think this is just Mara tempting me with distractions. Then I wake up.

A dream scene where a kid was running around seeming crazy while kicking a soccer ball ended and switched to me waking up in a bed at the old townhouse I used to live in. When I got up I was greeted by a former co-worker in the past and his friend. I said hello and asked him what he is doing here? He told me that he was trying to reunite co-workers again that he enjoyed working with.

He and his friend wanted to go find more co-workers and ask me if I wanted to join him and I agreed. As I am walking out to the front door with them it started to dawn on me how odd this situation is. I also realize that I was taller than I previously was because I now had to duck down my head to walk through doors. I realize I am dreaming and attempted to phase through the window but it wasn't working.

I then remember that I was planning to lucid dream today because I wanted to meditate in my dreams. I sat down and crossed my legs to begin meditating. I started to hear an intense ring and heavy vibrations flowing within my head. Unfortunately the vibrations and intense ringing got so intense that it was painful and I began to scream about my head hurting. I had failed, I tried my best to wake up but it just seemed the dream faded and I was only in darkness with a few blurred lights coming in.

That's when another dream began to form and I found myself in a bed again to soon realize it was a false awakening. I attempted to wake up and found myself in another false awakening only this time I was not lucid.

+ getting on bus, waiting outside for people to exit, doors close, I force them open to get on, the people on board don't want me (it's already crowded) so they force the doors close, I force them open again and push my way inside and sit down, sitting down, large group of girls in matching uniforms, white blouses, all get seats, for a second I think about standing up to give them a seat, but I realize I'm the old guy here and they wouldn't take it, in the end they almost all get seats,

+ view in theater 3 girls in matching red witch (?) costumes plus a couple others in the seating area, they're in the area to the right of the right aisle towards the back (about 80%, still some rows behind them), my viewpoint is from the central seating area a bit more towards the back from them

+ in theater, discussion about the fire-retardant properties of the main curtain, how it burns especially in stages, slowly, in a particular pattern, in order to give people time to see this and to escape. Meet Ewan McGregor, ask him about the fire curtain, he says "oh yes I've seen a lot of theater fires." I say "oh, really!?" with a tone, he says "oh, no it's not like that

+ see Mr. R (former scoutmaster) shake hands talking about boy scout troop <number>, with the other men there, I say I'm not the official leader of the troop just a volunteer

+ woman is taking dollar bills from a printer/machine and feeding them back in, several are rejected, and she gives up and takes out her wallet and puts them away in it.

+ See Neil M. working on computer equipment in a cube full of computer equipment in an office environment (low cubes, indoors), walk by I'd seen him earlier (deja vu?) I'm on my way somewhere else doing something, I notice he has a holographic white wolf display working that displays on his head making him look like a white wolf, he's moving it around rotating and turning his head

+ more scenes, forgotten

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

At some party with lots of people from many places. It's fancy but also in some desolate location in some ruins. I get tired and get out of there, to realize we're in an island. I ask someone what time is it and they say 2 am. I say that's not possible. They reply is the jet lag, that's why I am not sleepy. But that is not my issue, my issue is that outside it looks early morning, with sunlight. I encounter some familiar faces and they ask me if I am joining them leaving this place. I agree, because I know nobody else and don't know where I am. So they walk me to a dock and then some small row boats come and get us.
Then we're taking a trip by bus once on land again. Still not recognizing the place as the night falls. Then I recognize the sillouette of Las Vegas in the dark, despite all the city lights being turned off. I just recognize some of the iconic shapes in the dark, like the Sphinx and the Eiffel Tower replicas. When it is day again we stop at a large mall so we can eat or buy anything and stretch our legs. For some reason I encounter my father, who apparently was looking for me and traced me back here. His behavior immediately throws me off as he starts asking questions and making innuendos that I don't even understand. I ignore him for a while and I evade his questions, but allow him to follow me around as I look at the shops for fun. I am wearing a long skirt and a corset and he touches the strings on the back of my corset, asking what happens if he pulls the strings off. I am starting to feel really uncomfortable and tell him to stop. Then I look at beautifful dresses and he asks something like who I am going to wear them for. I say I don't even know what he is talking about. Then we pass by a section of lingerie, to which I don't even look at, but he starts asking if I like this item and that item, all very girly pieces with fruits stamped and not exactly for my age as if he is signaling he wants me to be his little girl again. I tell him he is sick and disgusting and I have had enough. He plays dumb. But I tell him I know his mind, I know he is sexually attracted to me and jealous that I grew up and might get a boyfriend (I say I still haven't had one, but if I did that was none of his business). He looks embarassed and doesn't deny it. I call him all the names I ever wanted to call him and move on, through a pastry shop and then a jewel shop. He still follows me and then tells me to wait while he goes check on the bus we have to take home. I do sit in a bench thinking about what to do next, but I have no intention to join him. Billie Eilish is playing on speakers and I start singing along, and so do other teens around who smile at me. Some even start doing a coreography and I am really impressed. Then some guy I know vaguely from school also sits on the bench and he is the one recognizing me first and asks me about what I am doing here. He offers me a ride with his friends that are coming. I accept but still I feel bad for leaving my dad alone, worrying he might get lost looking for me, despite all.
[Note: My dad was a bit of creep all my life and I do have reasons to feel some disgust and anger towards him, but some of the dreams I have been having are a bit too much, because I don't recall him actually abusing me or saying stuff like he says in my dreams. This is disturbing stuff.)

I was entering a school/university to disarm a bomb hidden somewhere on the premises. I knew this, because I was being guided by a woman who could see the future. Apparently there'd been a previous timeline where the bomb's gone off, and I'd died. Bummer. (Possibly, she was also a time-traveler.) I ran up some stairs where everyone else came down. I remember thinking that at some point someone was going to try and stop me, thinking I'm a student and I should be headed for class. I don't recall how things went, but I was successful this time and the bomb was presumably disarmed. Anyway, when it was all finished, I met up with the woman again. She was a beautiful, had long red hair, and was in her to late '20s. I quite liked her, and we got along well. I didn't want this to just "end", lose touch and miss this opportunity to get to know her better. Before I woke up, I had a vision (where the line between unconscious dream and conscious imagination blurs) of her lying in bed with me.

This memory was brought back to me by hearing a small dog whining outside my apartment. So I was in my old room back at our old house. Something happens, and "they" were coming to slaughter the cats (not our cats, but other cats that happened to be present). I think I left my room to let them do their thing. They went in, and it was a bloodbath. Awful sounds of cats being murdered, and blood splattering everywhere (I couldn't directly see it, I was right outside the door). I think I was supposed to be on their side, and let it happen. One kitty escaped the room and fled outside. I changed my mind, picked up the kitty, and ran out of the house. At some point I had to restart its heart with my fingers. My plan was to bring it to a vet, and hope its life could be saved.